I Say We Nuke Them

I'm only joking a little:

Sir Paul McCartney was left shaken but unhurt when his tour bus reportedly came under attack from a group of youths in Mexico during the early hours of Saturday morning, May 29, not long after finishing his second and final night at Mexico City's Foro Sol arena.

According to reports in the Daily Mirror, the incident occurred in one of the city's tourist no-go areas when a group of "thugs" forced McCartney's tour bus to stop in the street. The mob then climbed the bus before proceeding to jump up and down on the roof.

"At first his security team thought it was just swarms of fans but when people started scaling the bus, the situation changed in a flash." a source was quoted by the newspaper.

Clean Me

Every day I am going to do something -- no matter how small -- to improve my standard of living at home.

Tonight I went through the boxes of presents I have tucked away in the closet. Since my sister decided that we weren't exchanging gifts anymore, I winnowed through what I already had for her and her husband. Since my mom and brother-in-law are close, I'm handing off the four new shirts I bought for him to her. They're nice shirts, still with tags attached, and giving them to my mom will save her the time and expense of shopping for him. Best of all, it will get them out of my home.

The health/beauty items I bought for my sister will either be regifted or, in the case of the smaller or unbreakable bottles, will be sent to Operation Shoebox. I like thinking that female soldiers in Afghanistan or Iraq will enjoy the vanilla-scented body lotions and shower gels. These days I appreciate them far more than I do my sister. And, once again, it will get stuff out of my home.

I also discovered that I have so many gifts for my oldest friend that I may not have to buy anything for her until 2015. And while I still can't find handmade denim wine bottle tote for my friend Barb's birthday, I found a picture frame I forgot I'd purchased for her in Key West last year. So it all works out.

That's how this started, you see. Whenever I come upon the perfect birthday or Christmas gift for a friend -- ideal either because it's unique or because it's at an unbelievable price -- I pick it up … put it in one of the boxes in the closet and then promptly forget about it and buy something else, thereby adding to the congestion in my closet. I realize that it's that last part of my plan that I have to work on.

You Were Warned

This is Susie Essman. She is a comedic actress and, right now, a guest on The Joy Behar Show. She is not funny.

The Queen's Meme

When was the last time you ...

rolled your eyes? Probably this morning. I had a meeting this morning and one of my coworkers always inspires eye rolling on my part.

tied your shoe? In the locker room. I wear tennies when I work out.

reorganized your bedroom? So long ago I can't recall.

took a walk in the park? Easter weekend. And shame on me, because I both live and work near some beautiful parks.

chewed gum? Mid-March. I remember because I was on-site, visiting my client, and was worried about my breath.

drew a stick person? So long ago I can't recall.

activated something? A new credit card early last month.

took a photograph? So long ago I can't recall.

drank a milkshake? May 8, right after I had dental work done because my dentist recommended it and I was so stoned I just blindly followed her orders.

ate orange jello? February, 2009, right before my colonoscopy. Shudder. I shall never eat orange jello again!

google mapped an address? Last Thursday.

sang your favorite song? My favorite song changes with the wind. However, I was able to sing my favorite Diana Ross song ("The Boss") with Miss Ross herself last Thursday night.

made a peace globe? (Please show us!) November 4, 2009. I only wish it wasn't still relevant.

threw a baseball? So long ago I can't recall.

fumbled with a button? Button? I'm not so sure. But last Friday I did fear I was being held captive by the clasp on my necklace.

answered the doorbell? Last week when the grocery delivery service arrived.

spilled your drink? Over the weekend. This is not a rare occurence. My poor, poor carpet.

administered CPR? Never.

looked in the mirror? Last time I washed my hands. There’s a mirror over the sink.

testified in court? Never. I’ve been a juror, but never a witness.

made a sarcastic remark? Moi? Never!

offered someone advice? 4:30 today. My oldest friend is wrestling with some big decisions.

watched a sunrise or sunset? Sunday.

were jealous? Every damn day.

smiled when you didn’t feel like smiling? When dealing with people I know only superficially, like just now in the hallway here at work.

loved when you didn't feel like loving? Never.

ironed an article of clothing? I don’t remember when, but I do recall what. It was slacks. Is this really interesting to anyone, my Queen?

noticed you didn't give a damn? I care too much about too many things. I was even upset to hear about Al and Tipper.

had a mammogram? July

read your horoscope? This morning. I’m a Sagittarius. ”Remember, your attitude is more crucial than your actual choice, so don't diminish your power by feeding fantasies of self-doubt.”

moped? After lunch. Someone had the temerity to point out that my work isn’t perfect!

held someone’s hand? Don’t remember.

crossed a bridge? When I came to it. Tee hee.

threw away a candy wrapper? Monday night. Mournfully.

sat on a bench? While waiting for the train.

turned a page? While reading Girls Like Us as I pedaled the exercise bike.

tripped over your own 2 feet? That’s quite a regular occurrence.

dialed the wrong number? I don’t recall, but last week I did give my brother-in-law the wrong number. Does that count?

ignored a phone call? Whenever LifeSource calls. I just gave blood on 5/20. Leave me alone for awhile, you vampires!

kissed a bride? Never.

tweeted? Yesterday, as I alternated between the NCIS marathon on the USA Network and the Cubs game.

rode a roller coaster? Too long! I love roller coasters.

you were really you? When I was enjoying alone time over the long holiday weekend.

cried yourself to sleep? I’m not much of a crier.

were speechless? Ha!

rode a bus? Friday.

went to a funeral? January, 2007, when my uncle’s icky wife died. (Sorry, but death doesn’t make her more noble, it just makes her dead.)

were right? Around 11:00 today during an internal presentation at work.

smoked? Never.

were left? Sorry, I’m strictly, prohibitively right.

googled? This morning.

bent over? While taking off my tennis shoes, way back in question #2.

sent a text message? Saturday. It was to my niece. She’s the only one I text on a regular basis.

Lit a candle? Can’t recall.

Lost your temper? Haven’t really lost my temper in a while. I have gotten pissy a couple times today.

fell off a horse? Never.

changed the oil in your car? Never.

added a new FACEBOOK friend? Ages upon ages ago.

went bowling? Some time in 2009.

laughed uncontrollably? Friday night, while watching Valley of the Dolls with my oldest friend.

felt guilty? Hmmm … can’t think of anything recent.

looked up a word in the dictionary? Last week. It was the correct spelling of “raison d’etre.”

returned from the point of no return? When I sobered up Friday morning.

couldn't remember your name? Never. I know, as sure as I’m standing here solidly on my own two hands, that my name is Mrs. Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

surrendered to temptation? Monday night, and the aforementioned candy wrapper.

felt genuinely happy? I try every day.

saw a famous person? The aforementioned Miss Diana Ross.

kissed in a car? Too long! I love kissing in cars.

sent a greeting card? Last week – a graduation card for a friend’s daughter.

used your passport? Not since the Carter Administration.

yelled at your television? During the Cubs game Monday.

confided a secret? Nothing springs to mind …

changed your blog template? Last year sometime.

danced like no one was watching? Thursday night with Miss Ross. Since everyone was watching her, I’m confident no one was watching me.

wrote in cursive? About an hour ago.

took a driving test? About 25 years ago.

backed up your computer files? I’m supposed to?

when was the last time you said this was the last time? I’m tempted to make a smart ass remark about ever completing another Queen’s Meme, but I fear the dungeon.

To avoid the dungeon, play along by clicking here.

Too Much!

I have too much fat, too much clutter and too much debt. I realize I am not unique in this, but I am also slowly accepting that the remedies are in no one's control but mine. You may be saying, "duh!" but to me, this is a lightbulb idea. No more excuses.

Auf Wiedersehen

Tomorrow is June 1. I return to The Daily Plate and go back to tracking calories and exercise. And that means that my first Dark Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup will also have to be my last for awhile.

Clean Me

Every day I am going to do something -- no matter how small -- to improve my standard of living at home.

What was so great about October 2009? I don't know, either, yet for some reason I hung onto a lot of unused bank solicitations that all expired then. Welcome to shredder, bank solicitations! I also recycled dozens of train and bus schedules that were either expired or duplicates. It didn't make a big difference to the way this place looks, but it was a good use of my time -- spent watching the ball game, anyway -- and as I ran the bag of papers down to recycling bin I felt as though I'd accomplished something.

Movie Monday

This week's movie topic is all about Soldiers ...
Share your soldierly choices, linking back here at the Bumbles.

Lt. Doug Roberts -- Mr. Roberts. Henry Fonda stars in a movie that is known as a comedy but breaks my heart every time I see it. Doug Roberts is assigned to a cargo ship in the Pacific during WWII. He longs to see real action, to get into the fight, and keeps requesting transfers. The commanding officer (played by James Cagney) selfishly refuses to approve his requests because he realizes all the commendations he receives are really because of Roberts' talents and leadership ability. What we understand is that Roberts is already a hero, right there where he is on the cargo ship. If he doesn't do his job well, the soldiers at the front won't have what they need to wage war. "They also serve who stand and wait." Roberts may not be fighting the Japanese but he's fighting for his crew, making sure they toil away in appropriate conditions so that that their productivity and morale stay high. Roberts does his thankless job with humor and integrity. At one point, near the end of the movie, his crew finally appreciates the full measure of his quiet heroism and they salute him, one by one, sailor after sailor, saying, "Good Night, Mr. Roberts." And this old Gal chokes up every time.

Emmett Smith -- In Country. Bruce Willis is a revelation in his best movie role (and it should be noted that I love just about everything Bruce does). He's a Viet Nam vet who went home to Kentucky after the war. Suffering from post-traumatic-stress-syndrome, he just sits around the house and smokes pot all day, socializing with a small crew of fellow vets. He is supervising -- and lavishing love on -- his teenage niece, Samantha, the daughter of his brother, who died in Nam before his daughter was born. Emmett and his buds don't talk about their heroics "in country" very often because they don't consider themselves heroes. But when, at the end of the movie, Emmett and Samantha visit the Viet Nam Veterans Wall together, he finally seems to be able to appreciate the courage he and his fellow soldiers exhibited and perhaps put the past in its place and get on with his life. As a niece herself who understands the impact Viet Nam had on her own beloved uncle's life, I really appreciate this film.

We love our teams

I wouldn't disrespect the loyal and long-suffering Black Hawk fans by jumping on the bandwagon and pretending I have been with them all along. I haven't been a fan since the long ago days of Bobby Hull, Keith Magnuson and Tony Esposito.

But I am enjoying their success, and how the city has rallied around them.

Here we have the Art Institute Lions, the MJ statue at the United Center, the Daley Center Picasso and the Field Museum Dinosaur all ready to help out at center ice, as need be. I love it!

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: The Just Because Meme

1. Make a list of 5 things you can see without getting up. My dark blue sandals, my light blue sandals, my green sandals, my black sandals, and blue sandals with the black buckles.

2. How do you style your hair? How often do you cut it? I wear it short, parted down the side and brushed away from my face. I never cut it, but instead pay a very nice man $80 to do so every 4-5 weeks.

3. What are you wearing now? A Lucy Vitametavegimen nightshirt

4. What's your occupation? Do you like it? I am an advertising writer, and I enjoy the work part of my job very much. The politics of office life in a volatile industry weigh on me at times, but I do like writing.

5. When was the last time that you took a nap? Was there a special reason? Saturday morning, when I returned from an early morning vet appointment with my dear old tomcat, Joey. It was just his annual checkup, but at his age things can go bad very fast so I was apprehensive. He never goes outside, so he was terrified. Fortunately, it went very well. But when we got home, we were both exhausted!

6. Who was the last person you hugged romantically? Ha!

8. What was the last full meal that you ate? Pizza and beer

9. What was the last email that you received? A Chicago Tribune alert announcing that the Black Hawks won Game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals.

10. What one website do you always visit when you go online? This one!

11. What was the last significant thing you bought? My tomcat's exam and shots. Significant in expense but also in value, because Joey's health is my responsibility.

12. What musical artist did you not get at first, but then became a fan? Amy Winehouse

13. What do you think about before you go to bed last night? How dog-ass tired I was.

14. What was the last CD you bought? Simply ... Dusty

15. What is your favorite weather, and why? What's the weather like today? Today it's sunny and 88º. I'd prefer it about 20º cooler.

16. If you could have a special artistic talent, what would it be? Sing!

17. Did you watch the Idol 9 finale? If yes, what are your thoughts? Yes. I love Lee and I'll miss Simon.

18. What's something you'd like to say to someone right now? I'd tell my niece, once more, that I'm so proud of her focus, her work ethic, and her sense of humor.

19. Any special plans for this (holiday in the States) weekend? Anything I do has to be planned around Cubs-Cardinals.

20. Besides your current S/O, who was the last person that you loved romantically? His voice sounds just like Robert Downey, Jr.'s

In my prayers

Yes, I know it's Memorial Day and I agree that it's appropriate to hold fallen heroes in our hearts today. But my heart is expansive enough to include everyone involved with this natural disaster, too.

The clean up workers. Two contract cleanup workers were airlifted to West Jefferson Medical Center in Marrero, La., on Friday night after suffering dizziness, headaches and chest pains on boats operating about a mile south of the coast. (Read more: http://www.bnd.com/2010/05/29/1275187/gloom-grows-as-bps-top-kill-effort.html#ixzz0pQOHhpyu)

Our neighbors in the Gulf, who are on the verge of yet another economic disaster. I don't know how much more these poor people can take. First Hurricanes Katrina and Wilma, then the same Recession that slammed us all, now this.

The environment. It's sad and unnatural and simply wrong for birds, turtles and fish to die in freaking sludge.

My country. This appalling photo speaks volumes on our dependence on oil and what it's gotten us. But it can't illustrate everything we're losing, every moment that blown out well keeps gushing ... and gushing ... and gushing.

President Obama. It's BP's well but it's our coastline and we're trusting you to do right by it and us, Mr. President.

The right ending to a good day

First Joey and I went to the vet. He hasn't lost any weight, but he hasn't gained any, either, and for a big, 14 year old cat, he's doing fine.

Then I took a nap.

Then I watched the Cubs kick St. Louis Cardinal ass. Yea!

Then I heard from my niece, who was such an asset working my oldest friend's garage sale that she's been invited back tomorrow for apres sale cleanup. Win-win. Good for my friend (who is working toward cleaning out her house and moving to California) and my niece (who is squirreling away money for college).

Then I did a little "Bob Vila work" on my bathroom (see post below).

Then I worked out for the first time in almost a month! Didn't do much -- just a half hour on the stationery bike -- but 30 minutes with my heart rate at 129 bpm was good cardio and maybe even burned off a bit of fat. But best of all, it felt good so I'll be back tomorrow.

So now I'm celebrating.

Clean Me

I touched up even more cracking grout between my tub tiles and realized, yet again, that my bathroom is a mess. I have lots of ambitious plans for it -- but that will cost me thousands upon thousands. So today I decided to get off my progressively fatter ass and do something incremental about it today. I left a message with a contractor who specializes in tub and grout cleaning and replacement. If it's affordable and won't take too long, I'm going to have that done now and leave the more glam, intricate and expensive work for later.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Midnight Confessions


1. Have you ever had to confess something to a lover or friend? Of course. Many times. I think it's just part of being in a relationship.

2. How well do you handle rejection? Personally -- not well, especially not at first. Though I admit that sometimes I have been relieved by rejection, secretly certain that I've been spared something that wouldn't have been right for me anyway. Professionally -- I'm fine with it. For every major project we present multiple concepts and the client usually only chooses one. So rejection is built into the process.

3. What makes you feel old? Last weekend my niece -- a junior in high school -- admitted she had no idea who Joni Mitchell was.

4. What makes you feel young? Partying and laughing with my friends.

5. What’s something you are old school about? Baseball. I'm a Cubs fan and at Wrigley Field there's no jumbotron, no mascots, and no designated hitter.

6. What TV show's seasons would you buy on DVD? Tell us why it rocks. NCIS. I love team members and their camaraderie, I love Gibbs and learning more about his rules.

7. If you could create your own TV channel, what would it be? I'd take the premise established by Chicago's Me-TV and show nothing but reruns of shows I loved the first time around. Only my lineup would include 80s shows like Kate & Allie, Moonlighting and thirtysometing.

8. Where do you like to go for a day trip? Chicago's Museum Campus. It's been too long since I have visited The Field Museum and the Shedd Aquarium.

9. Name some things that you still want to do in your life. Get my bathroom renovated.

Oh, but I'm a crafty one!

I had Friday off and spent it doing my chores. But I put aside one load of laundry (my darks, to be precise). Then I contacted my oldest friend -- who had to work on Friday -- and asked her if she wanted any help preparing for her garage sale. She said no, she'd hired a consultant to help with that, but she was happy to just hang around. I asked if it was OK if I brought my darks -- which would save me the time and quarters it would take in my building's laundry room. But really, it gave me the opportunity to help her make a dent in that overwhelming pile of dirty clothes at her house. After all, she worked all day and her household is completely disrupted by the garage sale and she's wrestling with whether or not to move to California. My little ruse enabled me to do three loads of her wash, along with mine, without compromising her dignity.

That's why I gave myself a break from "Clean Me" for Friday. Now I have to get back on the stick and take care of my own damn housework!

Behold my wake-up call

Thanks to The Chicago Tribune for this terrific photo from one of last night's opening numbers at the Diana Ross concert. While I don't especially agree with the review (her voice was deeper than I expected, but not necessarily weaker), this pic serves my purpose here perfectly.

For this is a 66 year old woman. Who has had 5 children. While not the waif-thin girl she once was, it was still sobering to realize that one of my thighs weighs more than she does.

To make the message even clearer, my friend John's 80-year-old aunt came with us. Wearing a suit, stockings and 2" heels and looking better -- head to toe -- than I do. Really. At first I hoped I could look that good when I'm 80. Then I was honest with myself and realized I wished I could look that good tomorrow. I know Aunt Marie is blessed with exceptional genes, but still. She's 80! I have no excuse.

I mentioned yesterday that Miss Ross was one of my role models growing up. Today she is one again. While I still can't work out (vein treatment) until Sunday, I can resume eating better TODAY. And I must shake the self loathing I have let permeate my personal life! It is, after all, my life. I can change it.

I know the meds I have been taking, as well as the physical maladies I have had this year, have taken their toll. But God gave ME this body and this spirit and it's up to me to rehabilitate them. He expects nothing less.

And besides, it's what Diana would do!

Baby's First Group-on

I just bought a $220 hot stone massage for $55 through Groupon.com! That's 90 minutes of luxury at 75% off. (It's always easier for me to enjoy luxury at a discount.)

If you're a Groupon virgin (as I was until very recently) here's an explanation from their website:

1. Each day we feature something cool to do at an unbeatable price.
2. You only get it if enough people join that day… so invite your friends!
3. Check back the next day for another awesome Groupon!

Still have questions? Check out the FAQ

God, I love the Internet!

New Clean Me

Every day I am going to do something -- no matter how small -- to improve my standard of living at home.

For Thursday I only deserve the dust pail. I don't think I did enough to earn the broom, too.

I have boxes of gifts in my closet -- birthday and Christmas gifts purchased for family and friends while I was on vacation, or when I happen upon just the perfect thing at an unbeatable price. Anyway, last night when I couldn't sleep (it was after midnight, so it counts as Thursday) I started digging around up there, looking for what I already bought for my two June birthdays.

It was good to organize and take inventory, but the exercise revealed that a couple items are missing -- which means I never put them away up there in the closet. Where are they? Those birthdays are almost upon us, so I better track them down. Something else to do over Memorial Day!

The"fan girl" in me is so happy for them!

Here's a Chicago Tribune photo of the Mount Prospect American Idol viewing party at the moment their hometown hero, Lee DeWyze, was named winner. Look at those faces! They are TOO adorable. Why, you'd think he was Bobby Sherman or David Cassidy or somethin'.

It's One Night Only -- And I'm THERE

I grew up on Diana Ross. I can still recall The Supremes' appearances on The Ed Sullivan Show and the impact they had on me. It wasn't racial -- though she does deserve to be lauded as one of the first crossover performers (yes, after Lena Horne but decades before Michael Jackson) but that wasn't what made her special to me.

She was one of the few young female stars who came into my family's livingroom through the magic of television and dominated. No wussy Leslie Gore. No hippie/dippy Michelle Phillips. Miss Ross was always front and center, always dripping in jewels, high atop the coolest shoes, always looking as though this was about her, and she was seizing the moment.

Diana Ross was the first emblem
of female empowerment I encountered.

I didn't discover Babs until much later. But just as I felt liberated when I saw Fanny Brice steering a tugboat while belting "Don't Rain on My Parade" or Katie Morosky speaking her mind in The Way We Were, Miss Ross showed me that women can unashamedly love what they're doing and revel in their own success.

So tonight, I'm thrilled to be paying homage to the old girl. Rumor has it she's opening with my favorite song, "The Boss." Yea!

Congratulations to MY American Idol!

Did you see all those cheering suburbanites in the Mount Prospect Village Green? I'm so happy for them ... and Lee DeWyze ... and me, because he was my favorite all season. I loved Lee's spontaneously sweet reaction at being named American Idol for Season #9.

And I loved that I didn't turn the TV on until 8:54. The last ten minutes of the results show is really all I needed to see.

"I Want" Wednesday

I want to catch up my housework. (Duh.) I especially want to regrout between some of my shower tiles. The thing of it is, it's a messy job and I must actually sit in the tub to do it. Also, I have only one bathroom so it's hard for me to coordinate the need to bathe with the need to keep the regrouted area dry. So odds are good I won't get to it this weekend. Still, handling that would make me feel more caught up.

What about you? What do you want to catch up on?

You're bugging me, Bud

I'm a fan of Obama's. I want him to succeed and am pleased with much of what he's accomplished in a tremendously complicated world. But his laissez faire approach to the BP spill is getting on my last nerve.

He went to San Francisco and attended a fundraiser for Barbara Boxer last night, playing politics while the Gulf is polluted, businesses are destroyed, the ecosystem is threatened and seafood is contaminated.

Oh, I know he cares. But then, I also believed that George W. Bush cared about Katrina. Concern doesn't necessarily equal competence.

I want more action. Smart, targeted action. And I want leadership. While Bill Clinton didn't personally take off and find Timothy McVeigh himself, we were reassured daily that he was on Oklahoma City. I want similar exhibitions of conviction from my President now.

C'mon, Barack!

New Clean Me

Every day I am going to do something -- no matter how small -- to improve my standard of living at home.

This morning I took inventory of my watch drawer. Perhaps it's crowded because at least five of the watches require new batteries. At approx. $10 a pop, I can't afford to handle this all at once, especially not this late in the month/pay period, but I did slip a couple into purse and will drop them off at lunchtime. (After all, I can't exercise at all this week -- sclerotherapy -- but that doesn't mean I can't be productive.) Then I'll look them over, decide which stay, and put the others aside for Goodwill.

At any rate, I'm organizing the drawer and removing any temptation to buy another watch!

The Subconscious Doesn't Lie

While I have often admitted my abiding fondness for George Clooney, I didn't realize how graphic -- and I do mean explicitly detailed -- my fantasies about him were until I woke up blushing this morning. That dream last night shows George to be very imaginative indeed. Oh, my! Good thing I had a cold shower to dive into.

Lovin' Lee & Crystal

I could be watching the NCIS finale on CBS -- an episode sure to pack an emotional punch. Or I could be watching the Cubs take on the Dodgers within the Friendly Confines. But I'm going with the American Idol finals. And I'm not sorry.

Crystal is really in a special place tonight. Lee DeWyze is my sentimental favorite, and I wish he'd sung "That's Life" instead of "The Boxer," but he's redeeming himself right now with "Beautiful Day." Touch me … teach me ...

Crystal is in the zone. Can't wait to hear what she sings.

I'll switch to the Cubs game at 8:00. (4th inning, maybe?) Comcast On Demand should begin showing the NCIS finale tomorrow. (All I have to do is avoid Googling for spoilers.) And I'll continue thoroughly enjoying Crystal and Lee.

And Simon. I can't imagine Idol next year without him. I'm getting a little sloshed on Pearl Pomegranate Vodka in his honor. Here's to ya, Mr. Cowell! You will be missed.

10 on Tuesday -- "The Peanut Butter Cup Break" Edition

As I sit here at my desk, filling my face with the Reese's Peanut Butter Cups I got out of the vending machine, I will list the

TEN THINGS I'D RATHER BE DOING
THAN COMPLETING THE PROJECT AT HAND

1. Finishing Girls Like Us, the bio I'm oh-so-close to being done with.

2. Starting a new book (I can't decide which one from my daunting TBR list)

3. Listening to the amazing, exhaustive 4-disc Dusty Springfield anthology I just received yesterday

4. Writing to my friend in the Keys, letting him know that for his birthday this December, I already have a reservation for us at Jimmy Buffett's Margaritaville Restaurant. As a local, he doesn't get to do many of the more fun, tourist-y things unless I'm visiting.

5. Drinking pomegranate-laced vodka on ice. (Jimmy Buffett makes this gal's mind turn to booze, in more ways than one.)

7. Petting a cat. That's the glory of having three at home -- one of them always needs a little attention.

8. Sending a little something to an old neighbor. Back when I was in high school, I cared for this woman's sons and daughter. She has been very good about keeping in touch with me over the years and across the miles, and I want to let her know that the house she lived in -- way back when -- is for sale again. I think she'd really enjoy seeing the flyer.

9. Getting out of these freaking support hose and in touch with my feminine side by reading the latest issues of Glamour, Allure or More -- all of which are home, just waiting for me!

10. Looking back on the project at hand, satisfied that I have done it well!

New Clean Me

Every day I am going to do something -- no matter how small -- to improve my standard of living at home.

Today it was the medicine chest: I disposed of three tubes of ... stuff. First aid for cuts and rashes. It was all expired. I also removed four individually wrapped bars of bath soap -- two were gifts and two are souvenirs from the Marriott. Those are going to soldiers via Operation Shoebox. But first I have to send off the condiment packets I have been saving in the kitchen. I'll do that TODAY.

Thank you, Carole

I am reading Girls Like Us, the biography of Carole King, Joni Mitchell and Carly Simon. "You've Got a Friend" figures prominently, since Carole wrote and recorded and James Taylor (Carly's soon-to-be bridegroom) had a hit with it. I learned from the book that music executives weren't crazy about the song because it was too long -- but both Carole and James insisted on recording it. Millions of people were glad they did.

Like everyone else I knew, I bought Sweet Baby James' 45 back when I was 13. I loved singing tunelessly along with it. But lately I have listened to it, really listened to it, again and it means more to me than ever.

My best friend and I are bonded. No matter what happens to one of us (and much has been happening to both of us!), we know the other one is there. Out there. Somewhere. I mentioned it yesterday and he agrees: this says it better than either of us could.


When you're down and troubled
And you need a helping hand
And nothing, whoa nothing is going right.
Close your eyes and think of me
And soon I will be there
To brighten up even your darkest nights.

You just call out my name,
And you know whereever I am
I'll come running, oh yeah baby
To see you again.
Winter, spring , summer, or fall,
All you have to do is call
And I'll be there, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You've got a friend.

If the sky above you
Should turn dark and full of clouds
And that old north wind should begin to blow
Keep your head together and call my name out loud
And soon I will be knocking upon your door.

You just call out my name and you know where ever I am
I'll come running to see you again.
Winter, spring , summer, or fall,
All you got to do is call
And I'll be there, yeah, yeah, yeah …

Hey, ain't it good to know that you've got a friend?
People can be so cold.
They'll hurt you and desert you.
Well they'll take your soul if you let them.
Oh yeah, but don't you let them.

You just call out my name and you know wherever I am
I'll come running to see you again.
Don't you know that
Winter, spring , summer, or fall,
Hey now, all you've got to do is call.
Lord, I'll be there, yes I will.
You've got a friend.

Introducing "New, Clean Me"

Every day I am going to do something -- no matter how small -- to improve my standard of living at home. And this blog is going to help keep me focused. Here it is, not even 8:00 AM yet, and I've already accomplished my Monday task:

Disposed of an expired tube of insect repellent and expired Gyne-Lotrimin, as well as body mist that I never really liked, from the shelf in the bathroom.

Movie Monday

This week's movie topic is all about Brothers...

Share your selection of movie brothers, linking back here at The Bumbles. And don't forget to visit your fellow participants!

Love Me Tender. This Civil War saga is about one woman who loved two brothers -- first Vance, and then, after Vance was presumed dead in battle, his kid brother, Clint (portrayed by Guess Who in his movie debut). When Vance comes home, the love triangle nearly destroys the family. The brothers end up realizing how strong their bond is, fortunately before one of them dies doing the right thing in a subplot about stolen money. I won't be a spoiler and say which brother dies, but he does ascend to heaven with his guitar. I know Toby Macguire and Jake Gyllenhaal did a movie that had basically the same plot with the Afghanistan war as a back drop, but it couldn't possibly be as impossibly, CinemaScopically glorious.

The Godfather, Part 2. "I'm your older brother, Mike, and I was passed over!" and "I know it was you. Fredo, you broke my heart." Those Corleone boys gave one another an operatic level of grief.

She's a good kid, & I have nothing to be ashamed of

It's becoming a weekly thing -- My niece pulls up in front of my place and work begins. Last Sunday she helped me organize my paperwork, this week we helped my oldest friend prepare for her mega-garage sale next weekend.

My niece was like a machine -- plugging away at the task at hand, working hard until she was done. She cleaned away dust and nail polish and then waxed a butcher block table, sorted four shelves of books, and tirelessly hauled cartons out to the POD in my friend's driveway -- even though it was the first 85º+ day of the year. In nearly 4.5 hours she took only two breaks -- one for lunch and one to drink cold water and catch her breath. The second one was at my insistence because I thought I caught a quaver in her voice during her trips in and out of the heat with the heavy cartons.

"I'm fine," she insisted, rolling her eyes. "And I'm the boss of you," I countered, pressing a mug of ice water into her hand. I can't believe I actually said, "And I'm the boss of you." Teenagers bring it out in us, I guess.

Anyway, I was terribly proud of my niece. My friend was so impressed that she gave her a check for $40 and invited her to make even more money next weekend, working the garage sale. I'm going to pass on the garage sale.

While my niece was handling the physical exertion, I boxed some photographs, sorted some books, and did three loads of my friend's laundry. I devoted myself to moving clothes from washer to dryer and then folding ... and folding ... so that my friend would be able to concentrate on preparing for the sale when she comes home from her day job every day this week. (She still has lots to do.)

The three loads of wash barely dented the trail of dirty clothes that ran down the stairs and into the laundry room. I did jeans and socks and sweats and t-shirts and towels ... enough to keep my friend and her kids dressed this week. But I never got deep enough into the piles to find the bed sheets or underwear. If my niece hadn't needed to get home to do homework and prepare for school tomorrow, I could have and would have stayed on and continued doing wash for hours more.

So aside from reaffirming what a hard worker my niece is, I learned I'm not the only lazy housekeeper around here. Yes, my home could use a thorough dusting and vacuuming. Yes, I need to go through my own books and get the den in order. I admit that all that has to be done before I can begin changing the window coverings and repainting and decorating (and my bathroom and kitchen both need work -- like new caulking and grout -- desperately).

But my friend's laundry room was a real mess, and it went beyond the daunting amount of clothes that needed washing. A thin layer of laundry detergent covered her washer and dryer, and attracted dust and lint. These surfaces were so "gunked up" I didn't want the clean, damp clothes to contact them. I cleaned away what I could, using disinfectant wipes I found upstairs in her bathroom. An old kitchen curtain was actually stuck to the dryer lid. I didn't want to draw too much attention to what I was doing -- ostensibly I was sorting books with my niece and I didn't want to embarrass her about the mess I'd found.

My shrink has often told me that while it's not good that clutter has taken over my life, I need not beat myself up over it. I should just slowly but surely work toward the remedy.

I have known my friend since we were in kindergarten together, and yet I had no idea how messy her basement was, with all the dirty clothes and the pervasive smell of litter box. I still love and respect her; in fact, I feel a little closer to her now that I have seen for myself what we have discussed, that our homes have gotten away from us.

I got home and took a shower. After all, even though I was indoors her house got warm because the doors were open and I was baking in these damn support hose. So I didn't get to my own laundry tonight. But this weekend, I will do something to improve my standard of living.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: The Voice Post Meme

1) What's your middle name? Gal

2) How old are you? 52

3) Where are you from? Are you living there right now? I have lived my entire life in the Chicagoland area. Where I live now is about 40 miles from the hospital where I was born.

4) Is it cold where you are? It is currently 66º.

5) What's the time? Almost 10:30 PM on Saturday

6) What are you wearing? An oversized t-shirt emblazoned with a photo of Robert the Doll, my favorite demonic talisman, and support hose to prevent clotting (see post below). Yes, it's a good thing you aren't here because I'm sure I'm damn near irresistible right now.

7) What was the last thing you listened to? Something from my Dusty Springfield playlist. I'm seriously into Dusty these days.

8) What was the last thing you ate? A tossed green salad topped with slivered almonds, raisins and French dressing. I made it myself!

9) What was the last thing you watched on TV? George Clooney's exceptional Good Night and Good Luck is on right now.

10) What's your favorite tv show? Why? NCIS. Because Gibbs is my TV Boyfriend. If you see Mark Harmon, please tell him I love him.

11) Quick! Find a book, or something with text on it! Flip to a random page and post the second paragraph's first sentence. "Throughout the romantic whirlwind, Carly continued to write songs -- not just 'Anticipation' about Cat Stevens but 'Three Days' about Kris." From Girls Like Us by Sheila Weller.

12) What was the last movie you saw? How was it? I believe it was Shutter Island. Leo was very good, but I'm disappointed that I was able to figure out the surprise ending long before we got there. That took a lot of the fun out of it.

13) Do YOU think you have an accent ? Where do people in your country do people speak with strong accents? No, I don't have an accent. But Southerners do.

This is not the bad part

This is a photo of the sclerotherapy treatment I had on my veins today. About 15 injections on each leg over 30 minutes. Each site is covered with gauze and tape, which makes it appear as though I have suddenly spouted goiters. While unpleasant, this is not the worst part of the treatment.

I have to wear fucking support hose for a week. I hate support hose.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Upside Down

1. When was the last time that you felt your world got turned upside down? In a good way, my world was completely rocked on 11/4/08, when I found myself part of an enormous, peaceful, joyful celebration in Chicago's Grant Park when Barack Obama gave his victory speech. For all that it amuses some to mock the President's "hopey-changey thing," the spirit in the park was empowering, transformational and real. YES, WE DID!

2. Should the United States do more to help its own citizens before helping people in other countries? Let me rephrase that to "as we help people in other countries." I've posted about this before. I am stricken and saddened by the dichotomy here -- we generously opened our hearts and wallets to Haitians but there was no similar outpouring to those who suffered through the Nashville floods. Often I hear the homeless on our own streets described as "lazy," when in fact I think a majority are ill. So I wish we would extend the same compassion to our own that we show those overseas.

3. What was something you memorized for school and still can recall? "By thine rivers gently flowing, Illinois! Illinois! Over prairies verdant growing, Illinois! Illinois! There's an echo on the breeze, rustling through the leafy trees, and its mellow tones are these: Illinois! Illinois!" (Bows deeply.) Thank you, thank you.

4. With what types of people do you tend to associate? I am fortunate in that I don't think there's a single, simple answer to that question. My friends are a very diverse group, and my life is much richer for it.

5. Besides blogging what is the last creative thing that you've done? Since I'm a writer by trade, the people who pay me like to think I do something creative every workday.

6. In nature, what outdoor activities do you enjoy the most? Walking, preferably alone. I notice more when I'm by myself.

7. When was the last time that you had a great belly laugh? This past week a coworker showed me a photo of a State Farm agent who gave her customers piggy banks. It really had nothing to do with the woman in the photo -- it was the piggy banks and it's part of a long in joke and you really had to be there. But the important thing to note is that it made me laugh so hard I had to catch my breath.

8. What kind of fashion-sense attracts you? Clean lines. When I was a very little girl, the icons were JBKO and Grace Kelly and I think that's why I'm drawn to that "style of simplicity."

9. What traits in others turn you off? Space hogs. It's so selfish! Taking up space on the locker room bench with your iPod and water bottle so others can't sit; puffing away right in front of the building entrance, ignoring what the signs say, so I have to fill my lungs with fresh air and run through your smoke, just to get to my office; giving your backpack its own seat on the train; scolding your kid via your cell phone and in my ear ... You know, acting as though it's your world and we just live in it.