Monday, May 06, 2013

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 6

Day 6, Monday: If you couldn't answer with your job, how would you answer the question, 'what do you do?'


"The Gal Worries." That's what a friend likes to say, and it's true. What if I lose my job? What if the company that holds my mother's reverse mortgage sues? What if my oldest friend can't overcome her Depression? Why is my oldest friend so quiet? However will my friend in the Keys move with that unsellable house hanging around his neck? What if I can't find a futon store that delivers and will take away this filthy sofa? What if I never lose this weight -- will I become diabetic? What's up with mole on my back? What if John and Ed never get new jobs? The list goes on ... and  on ... and on ...

My mother believed in the prayer she learned when her mother was in AA. You know, the one by St. Francis. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference." And I get that -- in theory.

But I find that by (as my best friend refers to it) "awfulizing," I help myself prepare and withstand. If I worry, think it through, imagine the worst possible outcome there can possibly be, I then recognize that, "HEY! I can handle that." It doesn't paralyze me. It helps me go on.