Tuesday, September 20, 2011

I Want Wednesday

I want Jackie. I pre-ordered Jacqueline Kennedy: Historic Conversations on Life with John F. Kennedy from Amazon as soon as the project was announced. Long before I knew I was going to have surgery. So now the book and 8 CDs are sitting on my desk at the office! How I would love hearing her voice here at home during my convalescence, when I could really concentrate. Oh well, it is what it is. I've waited decades to hear these tapes. I can wait a few more weeks.

Sleepy time!

I was feeling so good, so strong on this warm, sunny Tuesday. I left at 2:15 for my 4:00 dr. appointment -- stopping at Trader Joe's for English muffins, the eye doctor's for new contact lenses, and my favorite coffee shop for lox benedict. It was wonderful to feel as though I was back in my own life again!

Then my doctor checked out my troublesome incision and deemed it just fine, but expressed concern about the tenacious rash surrounding it and phoned in a prescription for me. That's gonna have to wait until tomorrow. For right now, all I see in my future is a nightshirt and a nap before the season premiere of NCIS. (Sigh. I could really use me some Gibbs right now!


My pain pill only covers me for six hours, so no matter how I time it, every night there comes a time when it wears off when I'm asleep and I wake up in discomfort.

And every night I recall the gruesome nightmare I was having right before my eyes open.

They all have to do with my helplessness in a rescue situation, and I conclude that in dream symbolism the one I'm trying unsuccessfully to save from harm is ME. My subconscious is saying, "Wake up and take the damn pain pill."

The worst dream had me saving a tortoise shell cat and a black and white dog from the Chicago River, only to have them race into Wells Street traffic and get squished.

Another had me searching for my mother, who had slipped away from me in a crowd, and I knew she'd never be able to figure out how to get home on public transit without me.

And tonight, the one that awakened with a start in time for this latest dose, had me all miserable and panicked because I was in love with Charlie Sheen. I am not kidding! The codependent's Mission: Impossible. Even when I'm asleep, I crack me up.