Monday, February 17, 2020

Tuesday 4

Toiletries and Cosmetics 


1. What brand of shampoo do you think works best for you and what does it do for you? Four days/week I use Nizoral. At my dermatologist's recommendation. The bottle says it's a dandruff shampoo, and I wish I had dandruff, because there are far cheaper alternatives out there! Nizoral is the only OTC shampoo that contains ketoconazole, which helps control my scalp oil and irritation.


2. Do you have a favorite brand and shade of lipstick and blush? Nope. I don't wear them anymore. I think they age me. But when I was younger, I never left the house without wearing blusher.

3. Is soap your favorite for face washing or do you use other products? I use Aveeno Face Wash.

4. Do you have an all time favorite perfume or scent that you wear? If you don't wear perfumes, is there a scent that you love in general? I'm with Liz. Black Pearls, to be exact. It's been discontinued, but I have a secret stash

Introducing Darius. Or maybe not.

My OneWord for this year is MORE. I chose MORE to remind myself that's all I need to do. Not "everything," not "all," just MORE. Save more, be more productive around the house, move more ...

I fell off the bandwagon in mid-January when I got sick.  Instead of doing MORE, I was happy to do ANYTHING. But now in mid-February, I'm breathing without coughing, going hours without napping and ready to for MORE.

Inspired by my niece, I RSVP'd "yes" when my church asked for volunteers to be prison pen pals. My congregation is very involved with prison reform. And how hard could it be? After all, I write for a living.

What I didn't take into account is that prison is full of very not-nice people.

I was matched with Darius. He is serving a life sentence for a double homicide. GULP! He has already been in prison for 25 years.

I know we shouldn't judge a person's entire life by his worst moments.

I know that when we help the least among us, it's as if we are helping the Lord.

And so I wrote to Darius. I didn't use my last name and am using the church as my return address.

I am hopeful that he answers and that we begin a correspondence that enriches us both. Megan, a fellow congregant, has experience writing to inmates and will help me if I feel uncomfortable. And this is only a six-month commitment.

I am hopeful, but skeptical. We'll see how this unfolds.

"This is what I'm meant to do with my life"

So said my niece as she explained her foster parent training to me.  She and her fiance are beginning by becoming respite caregivers. If foster parents need a break, for a day or an evening or overnight, they can leave the kid in a safe place, with people who have been checked out by the authorities and are trained in CPR, etc. 

Then, after doing this for a year (and after their wedding and honeymoon) my niece and her new husband will become foster parents themselves.

They want to be parents, but they don't want to have a baby. They want to open their hearts and their home to a child who needs them. 

I am enormously proud of her.

Bad days down south

Henry's weekend got off to bad start. Patrick -- a lifelong friend of Reg's who stays with them each winter -- came home Saturday to find him sitting naked in the living room, talking to himself, and impervious to Patrick's being in the room. A seizure? A hallucination? Who knows?

Sunday, while shopping with Reg for tires at Sears, Henry had a full-on seizure. He lost consciousness, bit his tongue, the full 9 yards. He was taken away in an ambulance.

In the ER, Henry was stabilized with intravenous medication and sent home to rest.

I've heard all this from Patrick and Reg. I don't know why I haven't heard from Henry. Maybe he's still mad at me, maybe he's embarrassed, maybe he's still disoriented.

This all serves to remind me that Henry cannot help his condition. There are thing he can do to mitigate the damage, things he's not doing, but that's a quibble in the scheme of things. He rode his bike into a van. He has a traumatic brain injury.

So now I'm back to where I was, when my weekend began. I have to learn how to integrate his injury into our relationship. I'm still tossing counseling around in my head.