Sunday, June 22, 2014

They are good people and I worry

Both my Oldest Friend and my Best Friend are on my mind a lot these days. Their lives are not going well and since they aren't sharing the details with me, l am left to worry.

Oldest Friend. She has money trouble. She has kid trouble. She has health trouble. None of that is new. Her life has been a disaster since she moved to California. What's new is the complete lack of joy in her life. She claims to be a rabid Black Hawk fan, and yet she paid no attention to the Stanley Cup play offs. She claims to love Mad Men, but missed several episodes of the short season. She became obsessed with Michael Jackson after his death, but has not listened to the latest CD. She claimed to move to California to be near her cousin, who lives 90 minutes away in the mountains, but hasn't visited in weeks. Each of us needs something to make us happy each day. I'm lucky: no matter how bad my life gets, no matter how much I worry about career or finances, I always have The Lads and the Cubs and my cats and another book about JBKO. I wish her the same dependable joy.

Best Friend. We used to talk several times a day. Then we morphed to emailing several times a day. Then every day. Then every few days. Now it's sporadic. The thing that bugs me about this is -- he always sets the pace. He always has. I sent him a birthday gift and he let a week go by without acknowledging it. Then he wanted to know why I didn't respond to his email right away. AARGH! I know how hard his protracted period of unemployment has been on him, both financially and on his ego. I know that he can get to feeling low and, remarkably, worries when that happens that he has nothing to share with me. (As if feeling low isn't something to share with a friend!) But I hate that I don't know about his life anymore. Makes corresponding that much harder. And I hate feeling like I'm at his beck and call. I realize now, after a decade, that I've always resented this.

I feel better now that I've gotten this down. For while I'm pissed at both of them right now, I love them, too, and seeing it all written out reminds me that loving them is all I can do.

Sunday Stealing

90 part 3

61. Do you like current pop stars?  Don't know many of them. The last one that captured my imagination was Amy Winehouse, and she's been gone for three years.

62. What is your least favorite chore? Vacuuming

63. Last place you drove your car? Never, since I don't have a car

 64. Ever been out of the country? Yes, though not in decades

 65. Where were you the last time you used a public bathroom? Yesterday, at the movie theater

 66. Could you handle being in the military? No. I'm a fat, out of shape old lady with a bad attitude.

 67. What is your average cell phone bill? $65. And not worth it. I really need to shop around when my conract is up.

 68. Who or what are you thinking about right now? My tummy hurts

 69. When was the last time you laughed REALLY hard? Friday

 70. How many pairs of shoes do you own? Countless. Literally. I've never counted and don't intend to.

71. Are your toes always painted? Yes. Well, the nails at least. The current color is Revlon Optimistic.

 72. How many piercings do you have? Two. One in each ear.

 73. What are you doing today? Not much on the schedule

 74. Have you ever been gambling? Yes. I like slot machines.

 75. When is the last time you updated your blog? This morning.

 76. Do you like roller coasters? Yes

 77. Have you ever been to Disneyland or world? Yes, both

 78. Do you have a favorite cartoon character? Mr. Magoo

 79. Last thing you cooked? I made a bowl of cereal yesterday

 80. How's the weather? Humid and about 80ยบ

 81. Do you e-mail more than snail mail? Yes, but I miss snail mail

 82. What's the funniest picture you ever took with your cell phone?  I don't take pictures with my cell

83. Last time you were sick? I'm battling a tummy ache right now

84. What states have you lived in? Just Illinois

 85. Do you wish you could move? Not really

 86. Do you take a lot of quizzes? No

 87. What is your dream car? One with a chauffeur

 88. Have you ever wanted someone you cant have? YES!

 89. If you could be anywhere right now where would it be? At the Spa in Colonial Williamsburg

 90. Are you happy with your life? Happy but not satisfied

Are demographics destiny?

Went to see the film version of Jersey Boys, surrounded by a theater full of bald spots and dye jobs. I can't recall the last the time I saw such an exclusive collection of baby boomers. I'll be interested to see how the movie does at the box office. I wonder if there is a real market for movies aimed at my age group.

I saw it on stage a couple years ago and then the audience was more mixed. I don't know why. Maybe it's the combination of Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons and director Clint Eastwood that makes the movie For Boomers Only.

It's an OK movie. Not great. The stage production was more engaging and displayed more imagination. But John Lloyd Young (who won a Tony for the role) as Frankie and Christopher Walken as gangster Gyp are completely charming. And I love the music.

I'm unhappy that it went so well

Went to a new dentist yesterday. Less than 5 minutes away -- on foot -- from my home. He accepts my insurance. He didn't do any unnecessary procedures. He found no cavities and gave me tips for improving the condition of my gums. He cleaned my teeth efficiently and painlessly. I was in and and out in less than an hour.

So why am I sad?

I began going to my mother's dentist at least 15 years ago. He took me as an emergency over the 4th of July weekend when my own dentist was incommunicado. He was warm and funny and a Cub fan. Consequently I have been very loyal to him.

But he's several towns over and it takes at least 90 minutes for me to get there. And another 90 minutes to get back. And then there's the time spent coordinating the public transportation. Or I could spend $40 in cab fare. It's a huge hassle to get over there if there's an emergency.

Over the past decade plus his practice has grown and I never see him anymore. The dentists he works with have done good work, but it's not him. With their success comes the problem of how few and far between their Saturday appointments are.

So this is better. But I feel unfaithful. And I know I have to contact my now-former dentist so that office can send my records to my new dentist, but I'm dreading it.

I need to suck it up. This is a professional decision.