Thursday Thirteen #327

The 130 Million Club. Accounting could be the most creative art form in show business. Which is why lists like this are hard for a layperson like me to compile. Billboard's lists are different from Rolling Stone's are different from the Guinness Book of Records'. But, when it comes to record sales, these are the women that appear atop everybody's lists. They have all sold more than 130 million records. Now the actual order of these names depends on whether you're looking at Billboard, or Rolling Stone, or the Guinness Book of Records.

1. Madonna. Dear God, I cannot stand anything about her! But there's no denying her success.

2. Taylor Swift. Isn't she adorable? (I know, I sound like my mother talking about that nice Marie Osmond back in the 70s.)

3. Rhianna. I think of her every time I say "um-bur-ella."

4. Beyonce. It's her world and we just live in it.

5. Mariah Carey. I read that she makes more than $3 million every holiday season, just for "All I Want for Christmas."

6. Whitney Houston. I really wish her story had a different ending.

7. Celine Dion. I feel bad about not liking her, since she has lost her husband and faced serious health problems. So I'll just keep my opinion of her performances to myself.

8. Britney Spears. Hearing her and Elton's duet at the beginning of an episode of And Just Like That reminded me I'm so happy she seems to have her life back on track.

9. Barbra Streisand. My queen. Long may she reign.

10. Shirley Bassey. I'm surprised to see her on this list, but apparently she's far more popular in Europe than she ever was here.

11. Katy Perry. With such solid record sales, I wonder why she bothers with American Idol.

12. Lady Gaga. The only one of her songs I know is "Shallow," but that's OK. I'm old and not expected to be hip anymore.

13. Pink. "We're not broken, we're just bent. We can learn to love again." Now I have "Just Give Me a Reason" running through my head. Which is fine.

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

 

One Cub's brush with greatness

I was downtown this morning, heading from The Loop to the theater district, where the Secretary of State's office is now located. Since I needed to renew my Real ID, I was naturally wearing Cubbie blue because that's how I want to be memorialized. I donned my official 2017 NL Central Champions shirt, which was next up in Cub shirt queue. 

As I was walking over the bridge I noticed a tall young man with reddish hair and very well-groomed facial hair looking at my shirt with something that resembled -- but did not quite qualify as -- a smile. I thought he looked kinda like Cubs outfielder Ian Happ. I tried to make eye contact because obviously we're both Cub fans and that makes us part of a brotherhood and all, but he assiduously avoided looking me in the face. I shrugged and kept walking. It was a block later that I realized it: he looked like Ian Happ because he was Ian Happ.

2017 was Happ's first year in the majors. He went to the playoffs as a rookie ... six years ago. He probably doesn't stumble upon that 2017 NL Central Champions artwork on the street very often anymore. Oh yeah, and his name appeared on my shirt. 

Tonight he hit a grand slam home run. Clearly meeting me was inspiring.

See it here.

You're welcome, Ian. 

Yeah, Biden is the one who's too old

I know many MAGA supporters only get their news from outlets they agree with, so they may not be aware of what their leader said Friday.

Ageless and evergreen 77-year-old Donald Trump claimed onstage that:

1) He beat Barack Obama in an election "everyone said couldn't be won." Um, that's because he ran against Hillary Clinton.

2) Joe Biden is "cognitively impaired" and will lead us into "World War II quickly." Psst! World War II has been over for nearly 80 years. Who wants to tell him?

Watch for yourself here.

This was no gotcha interview. He made these statements on stage at a pre-arranged event in Washington DC, less than an hour from Bedminster via that plane he loves. 

"You spot it, you got it." That's what I hear whenever Trumpers go on about Biden's acuity. Or when I hear them complain about Hunter Biden without acknowledging that Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump received billions from the Saudis when working on the taxpayer dime in the administration of their Oval Office relative. Or when I hear them insist the 2020 election was stolen, even though FOX agreed to pay Dominion Voting Systems $787 million over false claims. Or when they make fun of Biden for telling hurricane survivors about his kitchen fire and remind me of when Trump threw paper towels at Puerto Ricans who needed federal help.

Keep talking, MAGA Nation. Keep reminding me of Trump's negatives.

Sunday Stealing

FROM PINTEREST

1. What is your favorite book? Saving Graces: Finding Solace and Strength from Friends and Family. I should reread this. It's Elizabeth Edwards' achingly honest look at the loss of her boy, Wade, and how sharing her grief and asking for help actually helped strengthen her personal relationships. Sometimes I try too hard to be strong. It's not necessary. No one expects it from me; I expect it from myself. I should follow this gallant lady's example more often.

2. Are you afraid of the dark? Nope

The GWTW girls; I try to be more Melly.

3. Are you mean? I can be. It stems from my impatience. I am not proud of this, and it's part of why my goal every day is to be less Scarlett and more Melanie.

4. Is cheating ever OK? It depends on how you define "cheating." Yesterday I took the train. The station was closed so I couldn't buy a ticket. No conductor came through my car so I couldn't purchase one on the train. Now, when I got off I suppose I could have sought out one of the conductors and given him my fare, but I didn't. I don't feel bad about this. It felt like I won something.

5. Can you keep white shoes white? I don't have any white shoes. But if I did, they'd be dirty.

6. Are you currently bored? Not at all.

7. Would you change your name? I would if I'd gotten married. My surname is confusing to pronounce and it would be a relief to unload it.

8. Do you like the subway? We don't have much subway here. This is "el" country. But on those rare occasions that the train travels underground, it doesn't bother me.

9. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? My nephew. We discussed everything from Ernie Banks' swing to the future of the Democratic Party.

10. Dumbest lie you’ve ever told? It was in high school. I don't remember the details, I just remember how awful I felt when I thought I was about to be found out. I got away with it, whatever it was, but the fear of exposure hung over me like an oppressive fog, and that was quite a deterrent.

11. Do you sleep with your door open or closed? Open.

12. Favorite month? November

13. Dark, milk, or white chocolate? I love them all! I had white chocolate most recently.

14. Tea or coffee? Tea. I hate, loathe, despise, and abominate coffee.

15. Night or day? Day, I suppose, but you can't have one without the other, can you?

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Got My Mind Set On You (1987)

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

 

1) In this song, George Harrison tells us he's willing to devote his money, patience and time to his girlfriend. Of those three things, which can you most easily spare? These days, my time. I'm on a fixed income now, so I'm being more careful with my money. Unfortunately, I can be very impatient.

 

2) This song had long been a favorite of George's. He first heard it in 1963 when visiting his sister in United States. He couldn't get the tune out of his mind and bought the record by James Ray. Do you have an earworm -- a song that, once you hear it, keeps repeating in your head? "I take once daily Jardiance at each day's start ..."

I do not have diabetes and have never had to consider medication to lower my blood sugar. I have no opinion on whether it works or not. I just know I dance around the kitchen singing about the little pill with a big story to tell.

 

3) Months later, in February 1964, the Beatles made their first appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show. 73 million viewers saw them, and an astonishing 45.3% of the TV sets in America were tuned in to the show. In addition to the Beatles, Ed Sullivan used his show to introduce Elvis, The Rolling Stones and The Jackson 5. The Ed Sullivan Show ran for 23 years and reruns are now shown in syndication. Have you ever seen it? Oh, yes! My mother loved to tell the story of little me in front of the TV that night in 1964 when the Beatles appeared. She recalled that when Paul McCartney came on, I said, "He's so pretty, it hurts to look." I still feel that way.

Sigh

4) While most of the best loved and most recognized Beatles songs were written by John Lennon and Paul McCartney, it was George who penned "Something." Frank Sinatra called that song "the greatest love song of the last 50 years." What's your favorite love song? I don't know why, exactly, but this is the first one that popped into my head as I came upon this question. I guess maybe because I love that first line: I spent a lifetime looking for you.

5) This praise represented a big change for Frank, who predicted in 1964 that the Beatles would be "of no lasting importance." Tell us about something you have changed your mind about. Conspiracy theorists. I used to believe they were dumb, silly and dangerous. After reading more about this phenomenon, I think they're gullible because they likely feel isolated, confused or vulnerable. These baseless theories help them cope with a world they feel is changing too fast or just doesn't make sense to them. So if someone extolls QAnon, is convinced the Clintons kill their enemies or swears Dr. Fauci lined his pockets with every Remdesivir/Paxlovid prescription, I'll try to find pity in my heart for them. (But they're still dangerous.)

6) Tom Petty, who went on to have more than 25 hits on the Billboard Hot 100, credits George Harrison as a major influence on his music. Tell us about someone who influenced your professional life. Ed was my first really good boss. He didn't tell me what to do, he explained  why I was doing what I was doing. He made it more about the end result -- making a sale -- than about my ego as an advertising writer. 

7) In 1987, when George's recording of "I Got My Mind Set on You" was popular, a squirrel unexpectedly made headlines. The furry fellow closed down the Nasdaq Stock Exchange when he chewed through a phone line. Do you often see squirrels where you live? All the time.

 

8) Also in 1987, third generation race car driver Marco Andretti was born. Naturally the skills required by a race car driver are unique. For example, while we know he can control a car at upwards of 230 mph at Indy, we have no idea if Marco Andretti is good at parallel parking in front of the local post office. How about you? Do you struggle with parallel parking? I was a terrible driver. Parallel parking was just another thing I was awful at.

9) Random question: When you woke up this morning, were you ready to face the day? Or do you wish you could have rolled over and snoozed a little longer? I usually wish I could snooze a little longer.

Thursday Thirteen #326

Thirteen websites I visit all the time. I admit I borrowed this idea from Kwizgiver.

1. Facebook. It's how I stay in touch with people and how I inflict my Cubbie/Rizzo love on them.

2. MLB.com. Because it's baseball season.

3. MLBTR.com. Because it's baseball season.

4. Chase.com. Yes, I bank with the monolith. They have a real monopoly on ATMs here in Chicagoland. (Yes, I still use cash.)

5. Twitter. I refuse to call it X. It's where I live tweet with my TCM buddies when my favorite movies are being shown, and get my latest New York Yankees news and rumors. (I must know what's up with my forever Captain, Anthony Rizzo.)

6. TCM.com. Sometimes I want to know my favorite channel's lineup far in advance.

 

7. Amazon.com. Everything is there. Really. They have literally everything.

8. Goodreads.com. I keep track of what I've read and get ideas for what to read next.

9. Letterboxd.com. It's like Goodreads, but for movies.

10. My local pizza place. They often offer coupons online and I'm a pizza slut. Go ahead, judge me. I won't change.

11. USPS tracking. This one annoys my oldest friend because she says it encourages me to worry about something I have no control over. She's right, of course. But I won't change.

12. Petco.com. My big tuxedo, Roy Hobbs, likes the Purina Pro Plan Salmon and it sells out quickly. I order it online and pick it up at my local store.

13. Blogger. How else can I keep up with you lovely people?

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

  

Dollar Tree Find

I found this little metal prayer box at Dollar Tree. It contains a tiny pad of paper and a pen, and printed on the inside lid is a passage from Proverbs: "She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future." It's such a perfect little gift that I bought two.

I gave the first one to Joanna on Monday. We celebrated her birthday at a French/Latin fusion cafe that was new to both of us. I was happy to fuss over her because she's had a tough run lately. She's been self-employed for the last 15 years and has been investing and reinvesting in her business rather than her retirement. Now here she is, turning 70, with no savings. 

Her clients have been giving her grief. One has been having her do revision after revision outside the scope of their agreement, so it's costing her money. Her other client is refusing to implement Joanna's suggestions, and then complains that her efforts haven't worked and now won't renew the contract. She's been in love with Sid since 2019, but his health and cognition are failing and she knows she's in the midst of a long goodbye. So I was happy to buy her a chicken salad sandwich on a very fancy plate.

The cool thing about Joanna, though, is that with all this going on she is worried about my adjustment to life in retirement. It's kind of a fact of life that no one worries about me. Or, as John says, "Everyone turns to you." So Joanna being concerned that I not have to walk too far in the rain, or that I'm drinking enough water, or that I'm incorporating my yoga into my at-home morning routine ... I admit it: I like being fussed over every now and then.

I'm going to send the other prayer box to my oldest friend, with a note explaining how she should write her worries on the little pad and tuck them away, leaving them to the Lord. It's perfect for her. But she will just toss this package to the side along with the other three she's waiting to open until she's miserable. I can't tell you how much this still annoys me. But the gift should be about the recipient, not the giver, and this is (I'll say it again) perfect for her. Somehow I have to trust that the positive vibes I'm sending her way will reach her.

Sunday Stealing

Magical Journal Prompts 

1. What’s the best beach or lake day you can remember? I'm breaking rules and answering about a river. My uncle had a cabin on Rock River in Fort Atkinson, WI. I was having trouble with my then-boyfriend and escaped up there. I remember a lovely, peaceful day, drinking santgria in the sun. 

2. Describe your ideal picnic lunch. Cold fried chicken, potato salad, watermelon, Coke. 

3. What flowers are in your bouquet? I like carnations. It makes me sad to watch flowers die, so hardy carnations are my favorite. They come in so many colors and last so long. 

4. Silly ways to pass the time during a snowstorm. Games are good. I remember a snowy day with my nephew when he was very young, playing Yahtzee and Clue (which is really silly with two people but he was little and it kept him amused).

5. The most beautiful house you’ve ever visited. I don't know that it's the most beautiful, but I really enjoyed touring the Peyton Randolph House in Colonial Williamsburg. It gives you a very good idea of how well-to-do Americans lived at our nation's inception. George and Martha Washington and Thomas Jefferson all hung out here. The Randolph family prided themselves on being good and benevolent owners because they taught their slaves reading and math. However, there was also no missing the difference between the glorious big house and the humble slave quarters. Once the children became of age, the Randolphs had no problem selling them, thereby tearing families apart. It gave me a sobering lesson about slavery's effects and how the slave owners deluded themselves about what they were doing.

6. Best place you ever dined. Last winter I had a completely awesome slice of prime rib, a baked potato and a bowl of onion soup. I remember it well because the restaurant itself was so deceptive. Lots of dark paneling and a neon Old Style sign over the bar. The tables were too close together and waitresses call you "honey." Very old-school Chicago. When you come in, you have no idea you're about to enjoy a genuinely sublime meal.

7. How many layers to your ice cream sandwich. Three. Cookie/ice cream/cookie.

8. Pretty things which are faux patent leather. When I was a little girl I had a black patent leather purse with a gold clasp that I carried to church. I kept cough drops and Kleenex and a comb and my quarter for the offering plate in there. I loved it, but it cracked and got icky pretty quick. 

9. What is the best way to eat chocolate. I can't think of a bad way to each chocolate.

10. Describe your unicorn’s special magic. I have a unicorn? Well, maybe I will if the Cubs sign Shohei Ohtani in the offseason, but right now, to my knowledge, I am unicorn free.

11. All the fruits in your fruit salad. Watermelon, bananas, apples, grapes, raisins. (Are grapes and raisins redundant? I'd like both because of the different textures.)

12. Describe the soil, grass, trees, flowers and rocks in your magical forest. The soil is rich, the grass is green, the trees are leafy, the flowers are colorful and the rocks are big enough for me to perch upon when I come here to read.

13. The lyrics which move you the most are: "I'm ready to grow young again," The Boss, No Surrender.

14. What are the best sauces in the world? I like marinara sauce, barbecue sauce and mild sauce -- though not together, of course.

15. Write a haiku about nature.

Don’t be so bossy

I don't perform on demand

I don’t like haiku

Saturday 9

 Cheeseburger in Paradise (1978)

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here. (This is my favorite Buffett song, quintessential Jimmy.)

1) In this song, Jimmy briefly attempts a healthier diet, which included sunflower seeds, carrot juice, zucchini and bulgur wheat. Do you pay attention to your daily consumption of vitamins, minerals, dietary fiber, etc.? I have a history of gut trouble, so I try to make more fiber-wise choices. I also have to look out for oxalate content because of my predispositition to kidney stones. As an old broad, I just can't eat like I did in my 20s.

2) Jimmy sings that he'd like french fries with his burger. Do you prefer to dip your fries or drizzle the ketchup over them? I dip.

3) Which cheese would make yours a cheeseburger in paradise: American, cheddar, Swiss, bleu, Muenster, or Monterrey Jack? I like the visual of yellow cheese on my burger, so I'll have cheddar or American, please.

 
4) Buffett fans call themselves Parrotheads. Concert attire for a well-dressed Parrothead often includes a Hawaiian shirt and a foam fin hat. What will you be wearing tonight? I'm doing this Friday night, but I can predict what I'll be wearing Saturday night: my pjs. I've got a busy week coming up and am keeping my Saturday and Sunday clear for chores and lazing about.

 

5) For someone with such an easygoing and laidback vibe, Jimmy is a very busy man. His business ventures include liquors, restaurants and hotels. He's also published eight books. All this in addition to making music! On a scale of 1 to 10 -- with 1 being lazy and 10 being highly motivated -- how would you rate yourself this morning? 1. But that's only because I don't think the scale registers negative numbers. I'm a slug.

 

6) Jimmy has some very famous fans. Paul McCartney asked him to play at one of his parties, and Barack Obama invited him to perform at a fundraiser. If you could invite anyone -- anyone at all! -- to play at your party, who would you ask? Sir Paul would be nice, certainly. Strumming and singing and telling stories. Sigh. That would be a dream come true for me.

7) Jimmy was born on Christmas Day. Does your birthday fall on a major holiday? If yes, do you mind "sharing" your special day? My birthday often falls on Thanksgiving. When I was a kid and through my 20s, I hated it. But now it just seems convenient.

8) In 1978, the year this song was popular, the Susan B. Anthony Dollar was first minted. The initial design was not a hit with the public because vending machines could not accept it. What's the last thing you bought from a vending machine? I used a $20 in the self-pay kiosk at Target. I had to wait forever for the machine to spit out my $12.22 in change. I don't think many customers use cash in those kiosks ... and now I know why.

9) Random question -- If today's your birthday, your zodiac sign is Virgo. When did you last check your horoscope? I used to check it every morning on the train as I read the paper while riding the rails to work. But now that I'm retired, I don't check it all anymore.

Well, that's a relief!

Yesterday I spent two hours at an ophthalmology center having (I believe) four different tests. I wasn't looking forward to it. Back in June, when I got my new glasses, the optometrist thought she saw evidence of glaucoma and recommended a more detailed exam. It took me this long to get an appointment at this ophthalmology center. 

It's been weighing on me. I'm at an age when my original parts are wearing out and breaking down.

The ophthalmologist didn't rule out glaucoma, but he said he couldn't diagnose it, either. Since I don't have high pressure on my optic nerve, he thinks what he's seeing is just the results of decades of near sightedness. But, since glaucoma can sometimes exist alongside normal eye pressure, he wants to see me again every six months for a year. He told me that he sees nothing -- nothing at all -- that leads him to believe surgery should even be considered, and if in six or a year my condition warrants it, he would likely prescribe eye drops.

I like this approach. We are being careful and vigilant, but we aren't jumping to act.

I also appreciate that the eye center is going to communicate with both the optometrist and my primary care physician. 

I am fortunate that I live in a metropolitan area where this care is available (though the 90 day wait for a new-patient appointment was worrisome) and I'm grateful that Medicare and my Medicare supplement plan make it affordable. I'm glad that 48 years of payroll deductions are paying off!

Photo by CDC on Unsplash

Thursday Thirteen #325

 

In Memory of Jimmy Buffett. Yes, I was sad when I heard Jimmy Buffett died this past weekend. Not only because I enjoyed his music, but because we loved the same places: Chicago's Wrigley Field (where he performed multiple concerts and sang "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" and The National Anthem) and Key West. If you watch the parade Conchs held in his honor Sunday, you'll see a Cub W flag. Warms my heart. He was one of us.

 

And so this week I celebrate him with a countdown of my 13 favorite Jimmy Buffett songs. Thank you, Jimmy. Putting this list together was fun, and fun is important.

 13. Mele Kalikimaka. Hawaiian for Merry Christmas. It makes me smile because my friend Kathleen loves to sing along with it. This was her late father's favorite Christmas record. Jimmy created happy memories. (And let's say a prayer for our fellow citizens in Maui.)

12. Barefoot Children. There's something magic about summer storms. I love that line, "The sound of the weather is Heaven's ragtime band." If my dad were here, he'd grumble and say I talk like someone without a yard who doesn't have to pick up the leaves and big branches after a storm. My late father was in no way a Parrothead.

11. Son of a Son of a Sailor. "Read dozens of books about heroes and crooks and I learned much from both of their styles." Love that because Jimmy the Beach Bum was also Jimmy the Author, Jimmy the Environmentalist, and Jimmy the Businessman. There were many facets to this Renaissance man.

10. Changes in Latitude, Changes in Attitude. "If we couldn't laugh we'd just all go insane." I am grateful that I find most things funny. To the extent that I am, indeed, sane, I credit my sense of humor.

9. Boat Drinks. "20º and the hockey game's on." Sometimes in the dead of winter -- on those days when 20º feels warm! -- it helps to order a tall drink in a funny glass filled with rum and coconut.

8. Grapefruit - Juicy Fruit. I love songs that sound happy but have melancholy lyrics. This one reminds me of when I was in a long-distance relationship. The agony of parting and knowing we wouldn't be together again for weeks. "It's so damn lonely when you're on a plane alone ..."

7. Wonderful Christmastime. I heard this the first time in the Margaritaville gift shop in Key West. I was far from home and my mom had recently died, but it was sunny and I had Sir Paul and Jimmy Buffett and my dear friend Henry so I could still have Christmas.

6. Pencil Thin Mustache. I adore the romance and honky tonk nostalgia, and movie geek in me loves the shout outs to Erroll Flynn, Boston Blackie and Andy Devine.

5. Why Don't We Get Drunk and Screw? "I really do appreciate the fact that you're sitting here." What a great closing time pick up line! This song cracks me up, and it takes me back to a more innocent time when this was considered naughty.

4. Come Monday. Jimmy didn't do many straight up love songs, but this is a good one. It's so authentic and relatable. (It helps that I don't much care for Los Angeles and glitter rock and roll, either.)

3. Fins. This is how it felt when I was cute and partying at the bars. "Can't you feel them circling, honey? Can't you feel schooling around? You've got fins to the left, fins to the right, and you're the only bait in town." 

2. Margaritaville. Of course. But why do I love this one? Because it's more than a celebration of Key West life. It's the story of a man who has had his heart broken, which is a painful and confusing experience for all of us.

1. Cheeseburger in Paradise. Because it's freaking awesome. It just is. I love that when my nephew was a little boy he chose to perform this on his first karaoke night while on vacation. Blood will tell.

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

PS I can no longer participate in WWW.WEDNESDAY via that link because her blog won't accept Blogger comments. I mention this only to save you the frustration I experienced trying to link up.

1. What are you currently reading? The Big Fella: Babe Ruth and the World He Created by Jane Leavy. This year I've been reading about people I've heard about all my life but really knew little about: Winston Churchill, Aristotle Onassis, Dwight Eisenhower ... Now, since I'm all baseball all the time right at the moment (the Cubs are on the verge of clinching a playoff berth), I'm turning to The Babe. All I really know about him is that he called his shot at my beloved Wrigley Field, he loved hot dogs and hookers, and he was the first baseball superstar and the game's greatest player ever.

A couple years ago I read Leavy's book about Mickey Mantle and found it both clear-eyed and affectionate, so I have high hopes for this one. After all, The Babe is still the gold standard, the player even Shohei Ohtani is measured against. It's time I learned who he really was. 

2. What did you recently finish reading? Murder at an Irish Wedding by Carlene O'Connor. Kilbane, the Irish village at the center of this series, is the site of a destination wedding. A famous fashion model, daughter of wealthy and prominent parents, is the bride. Not only is the village abuzz, a magazine photographer is snapping away for the Irish Enquirer. To complicate matters, someone gets dead. Our heroine, Kilbane resident and amateur sleuth Siobhan O'Sullivan, can't resist investigating.

 

I admit I didn't like this one (Book #2) as much as I did the premier effort. The mystery itself just wasn't as tight this time around and Siobhan acts foolish more than once. But I was charmed nevertheless. Siobhan's young siblings are a delight and I learned a lot about how Irish lore has influenced our weddings here. For example, the period immediately after the wedding is called a honeymoon because the bridal couple supposed to spend a month drinking honeyed ale. 

 

3. What will read next? I don't know.

 

 

No Joy in Mudville

 

He was in the dugout tonight with his teammates and he continues his post-concussion rehab in the Yankee Stadium facilities but, with a month to go, the specialists just don't think Anthony Rizzo will be ready to take the field again before the season is over.

I know from my friend Henry that brain injuries require diligent aftercare. I am glad they are being careful with him now. Now. I am still beyond pissed that it took the Yankees medical staff two fucking months to diagnose this.

I don't know how much of my impotent rage is tied to Henry. But I am not okay with this. Not by the longest shot. 

Sunday Stealing

STORYWORTH

1. Did you ever have a commercial you really liked? I don't have diabetes but that happy woman makes me want to take "once daily Jardiance at each day's start." Really, I heard myself singing about "the little pill with the big story to tell" the other morning while I was feeding my cats.

2. How did you learn to ride a bicycle? My first big girl bike was a pink and white Schwinn. I wish I remembered more about learning to ride it because it was my dad who taught me, and I don't have lots of good dad memories.

    

3.How did you celebrate your 21st birthday? The other secretaries took me to Pago Pago, a nearby Tiki bar, for lunch. I ordered my first legal drink: a Singapore Sling. It makes me a little sad that I can no longer remember any of their names. 

We went to the Jackson location; they're all gone now.

4. What fascinated you as a child? The Beatles. They still do. They're the soundtrack of my life.

    

5. What was one of your favorite playground games? Freeze tag.

    

6. What things matter most to you in life? Every day I try to do good. That matters most to me. I find that when I concentrate on living my faith, other things fall into place.

    

7. If you had to go back in time and start a brand new career, what would it be? I enjoy using my writing skills for causes I believe in. I wish I had become a full-time writer for a not-for-profit.

    

8. What do people get wrong about you? Everybody thinks I'm tough. Maybe because I say "fuck" all the time. I'm more sensitive than most people realize.

    

9. Do you believe that people can change? Why or why not? Yes. I know I've changed. That's what the therapy is for.

    

10. What is some of the best advice your mother ever gave you? Whenever we went clothes shopping together she'd remind me, "If it has to be dry cleaned it's like it costs double."

    

11. If you could see into the future, what would you want to find out? How long it stretches before me.That's the thing about saving for retirement: you don't know how long retirement is going to last.

    

12. How has your life turned out differently than you imagined it would? In some ways.

    

13. What is the longest project you have ever worked on? Me! I'm still a work in progress.

    

14. What have been some of your favorite restaurants through the years? My favorites have been restaurants that serve breakfast all day. I love sitting alone in a booth with my book while eating eggs and wheat toast.

    

15. What is one of the best shows you've ever been to? Wings Over America, the first time I saw him.