Monday, June 29, 2020


Since early this month, I've had high hopes for the sleep study my new doctor recommended. She believes sleep apnea could be the culprit behind my ongoing fatigue. I'm so tired of being tired, so tired of dozing off easily during TV shows and movies or with a magazine on my chest.

So you can imagine my disappointment when I was told today that my insurance company refused to pay for the study in a clinic.

I heard from my doctor's office that they are resubmitting, with the request for an "at home" study. Those are less expensive and more likely to be approved, I'm told.

I just hate that I have to wait even longer to get the answers to my problems!

This was unexpected

Last night I was upset. I was being hassled and blamed for something related to the condo deconversion and it wasn't fair. My heart was racing, my thoughts were bouncing and I couldn't concentrate. I was uncomfortable being alone.  

I called my oldest friend. She didn't pick up.

I called John.  He didn't pick up.

I called Joanna. From my movie group. We're friends, yes, but we're not that close.

"Hello, darlin'," she said. She was out on her evening walk but promised to call me back within 20 minutes. She did. We talked for more than two hours.

Her advice didn't really help, to be honest. She told me to stand up for myself a bit more, which I can't do without throwing someone else under the bus. I'm really conflicted about doing that. But she helped me feel less alone, and that's what I needed.

We spent a lot of time on her rotten week, too. I'm not sure my advice helped her, either, but I know it helped her to vent.

It can be difficult for me to reach out and ask for help (except from my oldest friend and John). I'm grateful that Joanna came through for me.

Not unexpected

My remaining blood test results have arrived. They're not great, but they're not dire.

My cholesterol is under control. Of course it is. I take medication every morning.

I'm pre-diabetic. That's not a surprise, either. I first learned that in October. I was going to move more and eat better, but that was before the corona virus changed all our lives. I've been hideously sedentary since mid-March.

Disrupted sleep can have an impact on both my cholesterol and blood sugar. I have a sleep study scheduled for late July. I look forward to hearing the results and getting on this.

Most of all, I'm looking forward to the mammogram in late July. I won't really be able to relax until I hear that result.