Monday, December 03, 2012

Holidailies -- Day 3

Today's prompt: Which holiday song do you think should be banned from the airwaves, and why?

It was outrageous and funny when I was a teenager … and I haven't been a teenager for decades. I suppose every year it gets played because every year we have a new crop of teens. But that doesn't make me any less sick of it.

Still, for the sake of those turning 13 this year, here it is. Let's just get it out of our collective systems and move on! (Damn you, Elmo and Patsy!)


Grandma got runned over by a reindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas Eve.
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.

She'd been drinkin' too much eggnog,

And we'd begged her not to go.
But she'd left her medication,
So she stumbled out the door into the snow.

When they found her Christmas mornin',

At the scene of the attack,
There were hoof prints on her forehead,
And incriminatin' Claus marks on her back.

Grandma got runned over by a reindeer

Walking home from our house Christmas Eve.
(On her way home)
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.


Now we're all so proud of Grandma,

He's been takin' this so well.
See him in there watchin' football,
Drinkin' beer and playin' cards with cousin Belle.

It's not Christmas without Grandma.

All the family's dressed in black.
And we just can't help but wonder:
Should we open up her gifts or send them back?

Grandma got runned over by a reindeer

Walking home from our house Christmas Eve.
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.



Now the goose is on the table

And the pudding made of fig.
And a blue and silver candle
That would have just matched the hair in grandma's wig.

I've warned all my friends and neighbors.

"Better watch out for yourselves.
They should never give a license,
To a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves."

Grandma got runned over by a reindeer

Walking home from our house Christmas Eve.
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.





He doesn't hug anymore

My nephew, that is. I suppose it's not surprising. He is, after all, a man of 13 now. But it did make me sad to see him climb into the car without giving me a goodbye hug.

We went to see Lincoln at my local movie theater. I am impressed by how well he followed it and how interested he was in it. Then we went to Five Guys for burgers and hung around at my place for a while so he could play with my cat, Joey. My nephew and my big old tub of guts have always had an affinity for one another, even when my nephew was a baby and unknowingly a little too rough with cats.