Friday, June 19, 2015

Yesterday's mail required a glass of vodka

Thursday evening, I opened my box and retrieved four pieces of mail:

1) Coupons from CVS (yea!)

Thanks, Lisa!
2) A package from the always awesome Snarkela, who surprised me with a pair of my very own, officially MLB-licensed Cubs sunglasses.

3) A summons for jury duty. Yes, it's my patriotic duty and I'm very willing to do it, but I'd be lying if I said I was happy about it.

4) A registered letter. Gulp.

It was #4 that had me mixing booze in with my orange juice. I couldn't pick it up until this morning and I had no idea what it could be. None. And, me being me, I was sure it was bad news. From a lawyer. Probably about my mother's estate. Which would precipitate spending money I don't have and dealing with my sisters -- which is always a galling experience.

I got to the post office and had to both sign/print my name twice while the mail clerk was holding the letter. I was so agitated that it actually took a modicum of self control to keep me from ripping it from her hands.

As I walked away from the counter, I saw it was a letter from a law firm in a far off suburb. Bleh. What could it be? I thought the crap about my mother's house was behind us! Ripping it open I saw my village mentioned in the first line. Condo association drama? I was so nervous and upset, my heart was beating out of my shirt like a Warner Bros. cartoon character.

Oh, for pity's sake! Turns out I live within 300 feet of a proposed ATM that's being built to be especially handicap accessible and I have a legal right to "cross examine witnesses about the appearance of the unit."

All that worry over a piece of paper that's going to go into the recycling bin as soon as I publish this post!

I do this to myself all the time. Will I never learn not to borrow dread?


  1. i really had to is typical of not only you but the whole human race...
    very happy to hear it wasn't anything!
    have a great weekend

  2. When you figure out how to conquer dread, give me a lesson!

  3. I love that last line.

  4. We all do it, so take heart. And also, if anyone deserved to wear those Cubs glasses, it's you, Gal. It's you! Try not to leave them in a cab but if you do, maybe another Cubs fan can use them. :)