Sunday, October 10, 2010

Being honest with my blog

I'm not proud of this, but it's true. I realized today why I've been so angry at my mom lately: I'm mad at her for getting old, which she's been doing rapidly this year. I don't want her looking so wrinkled or becoming so ditzy. I don't want her to be mortal and I hate that she's going to die. It's not imminent, but it's sooner rather than later. And I hate it.

4 comments:

  1. Very powerful. The health scares my dad's had in the past few years are putting me in the same position. I don't want my only parent to be so vulnerable to age.

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  2. About six years ago, I remember watching my mom make her way down the hall using a walker, wearing an old gray tattered sweater and it hit me like a ton of bricks - she's old. My mom is old. So, I understand some of what you're going through. Coming to terms with our parent's mortality is hard.

    Be gentle with yourself, okay?

    (Always much love)

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  3. my dad is 84..i am 64...sometimes i wonder who will go first! crazy!
    to think of losing him makes me sick. i have been blessed...as you!

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  4. There's nothing wrong with that strong emotion. My mom turned 68 last month and my step dad turned 72 in August. They are both in excellent health, but I know they are so much closer to the end than the beginning.

    I hate that. It's hard to accept that death is a natural part of life. I just don't want to be without them.

    Forgive yourself for hating it. We all do.

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Sorry about adding Comment Moderation, folks. But look at the bright side, at least I've gotten rid of word verification!