Friday, November 28, 2014
Playing catch up
I can't believe how long it's been since I've updated this blog! Part of it has been that old demon sloth, part has been that first I was busy and then I had the blues, part has been that I've been working fiendishly on my Nanowrimo, and part has been that I haven't known where to start. That's how I am when things get too far away from me -- once I finally pick up the shovel I don't know where to start digging.
So let's consider this post a bit of spadework.
At the beginning of last week I was battling the blues, and it's always easier to write about that once it's past.
Birthdays tend to be a time of reflection, and when I was reflecting I didn't like what I saw. I'm broke, my home is a mess, my career is stalled, I felt unappreciated by my friends ... once things started looking bleak, it spun out of control.
Looking back, there were four catalysts:
1) My poor Joey. He's fine now. Today he's affectionate, a little bit thinner, playing (even able to jump onto the bed on his own!) and eating. But my senior citizen kitty had been very ill earlier this month and, as I was preparing to go away to Las Vegas, I was worried about leaving him.
2) Financial woes. Not only are my personal finances a mess, it's come out that our condo association is broke, too. Like me, the board has been guilty of laziness and poor choices. I believe my dues are going up more than $40/month in 2015.
3) My cousin Rose. I love her, but if I spent more than 4 hours with her at a crack (really, I've timed it) I want to kill her. Since her divorce more than a decade ago, and then menopause, she's been judgmental and inflexible and more than a little angry. Last summer, I lied to her about the extent of my bathroom renovation because I didn't want her staying here. Well, guess what! She's coming back -- in March, maybe sooner! AAAARGH! Now I've got to get my bathroom done pronto or be caught in the lie. I don't want to hurt her, so as soon as I file my taxes I'll call Cute Handyman. Even though I resent doing it before I'm ready. And I don't want her staying here. And I feel guilty about how I feel about someone who is so dependably good to me.
4) My bedframe broke. I was getting into bed on Wednesday night and bam. I felt so helpless, like such a loser. Here I was leaving for Vegas Friday morning, and I was going to be in the Loop all day Thursday (try to find a hardware store in the Loop), plus I had to no idea how to fix the thing anyway. Well, I figured it out (duct tape, wood glue, and c-clamps).
Well, that's it for now.
Birthday and Thanksgiving updates to come.