Friday, May 17, 2013

Yenta, heal thyself

I can be very bossy with my oldest friend. Life overwhelms her at times and it's hard to resist the impulse to tell her to move over, gimme the keys and let me drive. And ok, often I don't resist the impulse at all. Like I said, bossy.

One of the things I've been bugging her about is Since moving to Los Angeles she's become more isolated. She needs friends! She carries on a tepid online flirtation with Archie Bunker and has been Facebooking with people we went to highschool with (back when Robert Redford was Gatsby). Other than that, she has the troubled son who sleeps on her sofa and her physically nearby but emotionally distant cousin to talk to. Period.

A coworker of mine here in Chicago used Meetup a lot last summer and expanded her independent, post-divorce circle of friends. She found foodies to eat out with (Chicago is a great city for dining). But there are plenty of LA-area Meetup groups that enjoy books and movies. My friend once loved her Chicagoland book club and hell, LA is the movie capital of the world. So I've been nagging and cajoling and being all pushy.

Then it occurred to me -- I haven't made a new friend in years. While my circle of friends is loving and diverse, there's no reason not to add to it, is there? And so, this past Tuesday, I attended a Meetup my damn self.

It was a screening of Mildred Pierce for about a dozen of us. The moderator, Will*, and I really hit it off. He appreciated my enthusiasm. Quite a few of the people in the room never saw the movie before, so it was fun to experience it with them. One of the women there was reserved but really bright and recommended another film noir classic, Leave Her to Heaven.

This group meets once a month. Next month is The Postman Always Rings Twice. I'm going to make an effort to go.

Now if only my oldest friend would get off her sofa and give Meetup a try!

*Will's path very nearly crossed with my friend, Ed. Will is an independent contractor for the company that laid Ed off. Chicago can be a small community.


  1. Meetup is great! I attended some when I lived in Chicago, and some when I moved to Providence, just to get acclimated. I haven't connected with a group in awhile, mostly because I can't keep up with all there is to do... but I met one of my best friends out here through Meetup.

    Of course, you have to be ready to go out and make friends. That's a huge part of it...

  2. Sounds like you had fun--that's cool!

  3. One of the reasons I adore you is this level of self-awareness. I can tell you (from having worked in various ways with a buttload of peeps) most do not have this. My mother was the queen of "take my advice, I'm not using it" so when I see someone give AND take the advice, I love it all the more.

    Sounds like a fun time for you! :)

  4. Anonymous10:34 PM

    Meetup is a great resource. I do not use it that often these days but it is a great when one is new to an area and need to meet like minded folks.