Now it's time for kidney tests

I spent all day at my mom's house because I wanted to be there to welcome her when she finally came home. We were going to celebrate Mother's Day early.*

Between 9:00 and 6:30 I busied myself by watching the Cub game, sorting her mail for her, cleaning out her refrigerator and running to the corner store to replace the yogurt, milk and cottage cheese I had to dispose of.

Then I got the call: the results of her most recent bloodwork lead her doctors to believe she has kidney trouble. Because of the meds she's been taking and other reasons I don't quite follow, she can't have the kidney tests until Monday. So it's in her hospital room she's stuck until Monday. Maybe … unless …

Her doctors keep reassuring us it isn't so much that the kidney infection is dangerous, per se, it's that the pneumonia weakened her system. They want to know exactly what is wrong before she leaves the hospital.

I finally it comforting, though, that instead of worrying about her breathing or obsessing about her infection, my mom is desperately unhappy that she can't wash her hair. I firmly believe that caring about her appearance is a healthy sign.

*I got her a handcrafted birdhouse (or rather, a bird trailer, complete with little wheels) and a gift card to The Olive Garden. My mom's best friend, Shirley, has a birthday coming up and I wanted her to be able to celebrate with her gal pal at a restaurant by the mall.

OW! Who knew jalapeno peppers were DANGEROUS?

Look closely at these little bastards. Remember, they are EVIL! I just dropped a can on my right big toe and OH! It hurts! It hurts! It hurts!

I've been tagged!

Here are the rules:

1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post, the player then tags 5-6 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they’ve been tagged and asking them to read your blog.
4. Let the person who tagged you know when you’ve posted your answer.

Thanks to Tina for the tag! Go over and read her answers and see if she and I share any common ground.


And the questions:

1) What was I doing 10 years ago?

In the spring of 1998, I was consumed with redecorating fervor. I had just received a modest but much appreicated inheritance from my grandmother and bought new furniture. My favorite piece is still the armoire that graces my bedroom.

2) What are (were?) five things on your to-do list for today?

1. Pick up prescriptions (one at CVS, one at Walgreen's)

2. Get a universal remote for the TV in the bedroom, and learn how to program it

3. Stop by the vet for special cat food

4. Call the office and check in with my boss

5. Get my 10,000 steps in

3) What snacks do I enjoy?

I'm sticking with Tina's answers … Hershey's is my favorite. I love cookies and brownies, or ice cream. My salty snack of choice is Cheez-it's.

4) Things I would do if I were a billionaire?

Oh! This is fun! I'd get a bigger condo and decorate it exactly as I want it. (Fireplace, built in bookcases, big bathroom … I can dream like this forever!) I'd hire a car and driver. Regular massages and pedis would be scheduled. I'd put money aside for my niece and nephew's college educations. My mom would have her own Peapod grocery delivery account.

Then, like Tina, I'd start taking care of my friends. My best friend would go to cooking school and, perhaps, open his own restaurant. My oldest friend would hire a nanny/housekeeper.

Now I could concentrate on charitable giving. Domestic animals and children would be helped first. Since the weather is getting better, I like the idea of sending children's organizations to Great America, and museums, and the zoo. Homeless animals would get the shelter and medical care they deserve.

5) Three Bad Habits

My laziness, my pack rat tendencies, and my awfulizing.

6) 5 places I have lived

The house where I was born

The house I grew up in

My apartment

My condo

Sorry, that's all there is -- there ain't no more

7) 5 Jobs I've had

Receptionist at a real estate office, secretary at Sears HQ (back when we called secretaries), catalog copywriter, associate creative director, creative director

Five people I want to know more about…

You, and you, and you, and you and most of all, YOU! (I feel like Miss Elizabeth on Romper Room, who claimed she could see us through her magic mirror)

No reason, really

I just like this photo. It made me happy to see John Edwards on Morning Joe and to read in People about the Edwards family's trip to Disney. This has nothing to do with whether he is actually endorsing Obama. We can consider that another time. Today, it's just that I enjoy looking at him.

Another day!!!

My mother's doctor is still perplexed by her high WBC count and so, instead of going home, my mother got to give even MORE blood!

I'd be getting scared again, except that she sounds so good. Today she asked me to fill her in on the NBA finals and was disappointed that, while I am encyclopedic when it comes to American Idol, I am useless when it comes to Dancing with the Stars. Also, her doctor told her not to worry. I'm assuming that extends to me, too.

Still, I'm frustrated. I want my mom home!

How I know my mom is feeling better …

She's STILL in the hospital. She's coming home tomorrow afternoon (so they assure me -- as they assured me Tuesday and Wednesday and today). But today we gossiped about Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer. And my uncle's first wife, who was nice enough to call my mom in the hospital -- she's so much nicer than his second wife. And Hillary Clinton (my mom feels suprisingly sorry for her and hopes she can get out of the race with her pride in tact).

These are not the topics that preoccupy a woman who is afraid she'll never be able to breathe normally again. Hopefully we'll be able to have a sleep-over tomorrow night at her house, and I'll give her early Mother's Day gifts.

Remember "The Boxer?"

It's an old Paul Simon song. "I have squandered my resistance, for a pocketful of mumbles, such are promises. All lies and jest. Still a man hears what he wants to hear and disregards the rest."

Those lines make me think of the Clinton campaign. Everyone is telling her she can't win. Today's Tribune says she has to win 67% of the remaining delegates, which is nearly impossible. Especially because her campaign has no money coming in, except her's.

Yet she keeps going. It's as though she believed the hype of a year ago -- that she is inevitable, that now is her turn, that somehow she deserves the nomination. Perhaps because of all she endured and sacrificed to help her husband win the Presidency -- beginning when she chose him and Arkansas after she graduated from law school. Now that those promises have turned out to be nothing but lies and jest, she hears what she wants to hear and disregards the rest.

Hugging Victoria

I'm sitting here waiting to hear that my mom is finally coming home from the hospital (long story, separate entry to come) and I'm watching an infomercial for Victoria Principal's Reclaim cosmetics line.

I like Victoria's products and have been using some of them for more than a decade. I know I don't look my age and I give this line some credit for that. But if Victoria Principal and I were to suddenly cross paths, would I hug her in gratitude? No. A handshake, sure. Perhaps even a surprised, delighted squeal. But no hug.

That's one thing I've noticed about this infomercial: all the women who are on air to provide testimonials seem so comfortable with Victoria, so eager to hug her.

Is it because the products are so wonderful? Because these women watched her as Pam on Dallas for all those years?

THURSDAY THIRTEEN #66 -- Remembering JFK

THIRTEEN GOOD BOOKS ABOUT
JOHN FITZGERALD KENNEDY

John F. Kennedy was once a sick, lonely little boy who found solace in books and believed in heroes like King Arthur and Robin Hood. So there’s a symmetry to his becoming a hero himself, one later generations have discovered through books. That’s how I became inspired by him, and because of his example I view politics as an honorable profession and I see politicians as public servants.

This TT first occurred to me when Caroline Kennedy endorsed Barack Obama by writing that he’d be a President like her father. If you’re wondering what makes JFK so influential, check out these 13 books. JFK comes alive on these pages.

BTW, this month marks the 91st anniversary of JFK’s birth. I prefer to think of him now, rather than on the anniversary of his death in November. It seems that his assassination has overshadowed his life, which is too bad, because it was quite a life.

1. An Unfinished Life by Robert Dallek. A serious look at his life and presidency. Dallek – a respected LBJ scholar who is very familiar with these times – takes pains to put everything in the proper, and fair, context. Civil rights, Russia and Cuba (both the Missile Crisis and the Bay of Pigs), the race to the moon … it’s all here, including Kennedy’s enduring legacy, which Dallek movingly writes continues “to speak to our better angels.”

2. JFK: Reckless Youth by Nigel Hamilton. How I love this book! Taking us from Brookline to Congress, it’s a “warts-and-all” portrait of the boy who became the man. (There are so many warts that the Kennedy family now regrets giving the author access and, regrettably, plans for the second volume have been abandoned.) Yes, there’s the affair with “Inga Binga.” His relationship with his family is explored – especially enlightening was the tension between mother and son. JFK and Rose seemed to be very gifted at annoying and disappointing one another. His pre-war trip to Europe is examined extensively, as are his Navy heroics. But most moving were his illnesses and the pain and loneliness he learned, at a very young age, to live with. This book taught me that no matter how good a life looks from the outside, you have no idea how it feels on the inside.

3. A Thousand Days by Arthur Schlessinger. Written in 1965, before many of the salacious details of JFK’s personal life were well known, this is still a valuable and important read. Schlessinger was a member of the Kennedy inner circle, and he makes us feel as though we know what it was like in the Oval Office. But again, if you’re looking for tales of naked swimming parties or sex sessions with Marilyn Monroe, this is NOT the book for you.

4. Conversations with Kennedy by Ben Bradlee. A famous journalist recalls his close friendship with his most famous buddy. A joy to read. There’s a lot of machismo on these pages – in the 1960s, these two WWII vets believed they’d done exceptionally well for themselves (one was editor of Newsweek, the other was, well, Leader of the Free World). A personal, affectionate, yet very credible portrait.

5. President Kennedy: A Profile in Power by Richard Reeves. The JFK that emerges from these pages is a consummate politician. Free of ideology or emotion, but with charisma and drive to spare, Reeves’ Kennedy evolves from a mediocre Senator to a good-enough President who kept cool during crises. Did I like this book? Not really. But reading it has given me a more balanced portrait of the man.

6. Jack: A Life like No Other by Geoffrey Perret. A portrait of a man who loved life and lived it to the hilt. Because it’s a biography of the man who became President (as opposed to his Presidency), there’s a lot here that’s not flattering. (Yes, the Addison’s disease and the women.) But his leadership qualities, his intellectual curiosity and sophistication, his wit, his vision for the country and the world …all that’s inspiring is here, too.

7. Johnny, We Hardly Knew Ye by Kenny O’Donnell and Dave Powers. An affectionate look at the man by two of his closest and most loyal friends. There’s a lot of detail in this book and I learned a lot. However, it’s not remotely balanced. O’Donnell and Powers loved the Kennedy brothers, especially the President, and are protective of his legacy. I respected and even appreciated it as I read this warm, funny and ultimately poignant memoir.

8. Grace and Power: The Private World of the Kennedy White House by Sally Bedell Smith. There’s not a lot of history here, but a lot of humanity. How did JFK and Jackie handle life in the White House? How did it effect their relationship, their relationships with their children and their families? What’s it like to be at the center of history when history is being made?

9. The Kennedys and the Fitzgeralds by Doris Kearns Goodwin. I’m a big fan of DKG, and this was a happy union of writer and subject. She looks at the Kennedys as the ultimate American immigrant tale, beginning in Ireland and ending with the Kennedy Inauguration. Rose and Joe Kennedy are really the stars of this tome, but to understand JFK, it helps to understand “the clan.”

10. The John F. Kennedys: A Family Album by Mark Shaw. The coffee table book is a gorgeous, black and white Valentine to Camelot. If you’re young enough to wonder what all the fuss was about, all the talk about the Kennedy Mystique and glamour and vitality and style, it’s captured on these pages.

11. The Kennedy White House by Carl Sferrazza Anthony. He’s a well respected biographer of America’s First Ladies, and he brings that perspective to family life in the White House in the 1960s. It’s as close as I believe This Gal will ever get!

12. PT-109 by Robert Donovan. When asked how he became a war hero, Kennedy used to shrug and say, “They sunk my boat.” He was uncomfortable with all the acclaim that accompanied his heroics because the incident meant so very much to him. The men he served with on that little bucket, the men he lost when “they sunk his boat.” To his death he maintained relationships with his shipmates and gave away PT-109 tie pins to those he wished to congratulate or inspire. This spare story inspired me. JFK overcame pain and fear and discouragement to prevail and keep much of his team alive. He persevered and took chances and showed faith. It was a defining moment in his life, and in the life of this nation because of how much it influenced his handling of the Cuban Missile Crisis. When I saw the coconut that played a pivotal role in his rescue at the JFK Library, I admit I welled up. “What man has done, man can do.”

13. Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy by Donald Spoto. This book seems to present a fair view of a complicated marriage. Two independent and basically lonely people, each with a distant mother and a philandering father, would have had a hard time making a go of their marriage under the best circumstances. These were not the best circumstances. But I came away believing that they loved each other – at least as much as they could – and that they certainly loved their children.

PLEASE NOTE: This week I may not be at my keyboard as much as I usually would. So if I don't include you here and don't get to visit your TT, I apologize. Family obligations …

Leave your link in comments and I'll include you here:
1) Sue's TT will make you smile
2) Hootin' Ani's TT is indeed GROSS
3) Anthony North stayed true to the theme, as well, with entertaining results
4) Sandy Carlson has a poetic TT
5) Nicholas takes a crack at last week's alphabet theme but puts a literary spin on it
6) SJR has a yummy TT
7) Janet has a letter-perfect TT
8) Adelle has a funny TT about aging
9) Claudia has a memorable TT
10) Linda R. Moore offers us a choice of 13 great photos
11) Susan Helene Gottfried (and the band) come up with 13 reasons not to rehearse
12) Journeywoman has a remarkable Mother's Day TT
13) Lori has a tender TT devoted to moms
14) Kay's TT was inspired by her love of the grape
15) Yellowrose's Garden lists her mandatories
16) Amy Shipp shares vacation ideas



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White Women? Check.

Blue-collar white males? Check. Populists (as opposed to "elitists")? Check.

I don't think Barack Obama will have too much trouble bringing those groups back into the fold with John and Elizabeth Edwards by his side. After all (except for women over 50), those groups made up John Edwards' natural constituency. I was surprised that Hillary was able to woo them after Edwards dropped out, but she did … successfully, too.

Still, I don't think the rift between Clinton-Obama supporters is so deep, so irreconcilable that Barack can't convince voters that he is more in tune to them and their needs than John McCain. Naturally having a good ol' boy with a moonlight-and-magnolias accent and his courageous, angel of a wife at Obama's side will help.

The Edwards' haven't committed yet, but they will once Obama becomes the undisputed nominee. And I hope there's a Cabinet position in the offing for this man. John Edwards could be a terrific activist attorney general in the Bobby Kennedy mold.

Shhh! Gotta keep this a secret!

At 3:30 today, I finally got to show my coworkers a portion of the major project I've been working on. Seems wires got crossed because what I presented was not what some members of the team was expecting.

This rattled me not because I am perfect and my work is always spot on. No, I was upset because I told everyone yesterday that I probably had to leave at 3:00 (in case my mom needed me), and the later we reviewed the work together, the harder it would be for me to make revisions. Unfortunately this input didn't require revisions, this called for a "do over."

Everyone said they were sorry. Of course they wished my mom well and hoped that I had time to hand this project off to someone else (Yeah? Who would that be?) before I left to be by her side. They even touched me a lot. I'm not crazy about coworker touching.

I scurried back to my office, expecting to find that my mom was on her way home and needed me there, but discovered instead she wasn't being released tonight anyway. I admit I was shaken for a while, letting a wave of "Now what?" wash over me. But then, once it sunk in that
I wasn't needed at home, I was able to focus on the project at hand … and I was rejuvenated. I understood that the input I was given was wise and on target. Suddenly I was able to quickly, efficiently craft a new creative concept and email it to my boss (who had already gone home for the night).

It's the "quickly, efficiently" part that I'd kinda like to stay between a gal and her blog. I don't mind my coworkers thinking that I struggled with it, even as I tried to race to my sick mother's side. Summer is coming. I may want to cut out early to listen to the end of a hard-fought Cub game from a beer garden. (Doesn't that sound lovely?) Now is a good time to have a little extra insurance in my emotional bank account.

More tests!

My mom thought she was coming home today, but she isn't. Her doctors want to take one last, longing look at her lungs and blood. So I get to wait another day to play Nurse Nancy. (I had this book when I was little and completely loved it.)

My mom is not unhappy, nor is she disappointed, about staying another day in the hospital. She's of the generation when women stayed in the hospital for 5 days after even the uneventful delivery of a healthy baby, so she expects to remain in the hospital until she's strong again. Alas, the world has changed. But at least she gets another night to feel "safe."

What? No mention of my Puerto Vallerta Violeta pedi?

Other than that sinful omission, I think this is pretty accurate. (I must give credit to Kwizgiver, as she's the one I stole this Blogthing from.)

What Your Feet Say About You:

You are more expressive than most people. You let everyone know how you're feeling - the good, the bad, and the ugly. You are a somewhat passionate person. A few things get you very fired up, but you're usually pretty laid back. You are an assertive person at times. You'll pull out all the stops to get what you want, if it's worth it. You take a while to fall in love, but once you do, you stay pretty attached to your partner. You are not afraid of anything. You are brave and courageous, even when most people would be terrified. You are very practical and down to earth. You're more concerned with action than thoughts. You are a fairly hard worker, but you are also a little spoiled. You like indulge yourself every now and then. You are not easily influenced by other people. You hold your ground and are true to your beliefs.

What Do Your Feet Say About You?

Manic Monday #10

I haven't particpated in a while, so I apologize if I'm rusty. But here goes!

What name would you want to have if you were the opposite sex? Jeff. I don't know why. I just like it.

Would you share the tooth brush of your spouse/significant other? Why or why not? No. I'd rather just make do by squeezing a ribbon of paste onto my index finger. Considering some of the indelicate things my significant others and I have shared, I realize this makes no sense. But there you go.

What is a song that you love to hate? The first one that springs to mind is Madonna's "Vogue."

To compare answers, or play along yourself, visit Manic Monday.

Retail Therapy

• A pair of denim shorts (so depressingly big they look like the flag of a small country)

• A pair of lightweight blue slacks

• A pair of lightweight black slacks

• Good Skin All-Firm Moisturizer

• Set of multi-colored striped sheets

• A pair of teeny-tiny lavender onesies (a former coworker is awaiting the birth of a little girl)

All for $121.99

Between sale prices and my special discount for being a cardholder, I saved 61%.

Everything I bought I needed (note how I avoided the sunglasses), and everything was a bargain. I'm not in looooove with any of these purchases, but I do find my discipline and frugality satisfying.

To exercise discipline and frugality, you don't wander the aisles at Nordstrom or Carson's. To impress yourself with your self-control and your good money-sense, you gotta go to Kohl's.

Emphysema with a pneumonia chaser

Chronic cough, shortness of breath, weight loss, reduced lung function = Emphysema. Add the fever and fatigue of pneumonia, and you have my very sick mother.

It's not that I'm HAPPY about this diagnosis. I'd prefer that she not be sick at all. I'd be happier if she were at home, enjoying her garden and caring for her cats, Lucy and Ethel.

But I'm very grateful it's not lung cancer.

She has to stay in the hospital at least through Tuesday morning. I'm staying with her on her first night home. I want to make sure she's safe and comfortable. I also want to familiarize myself with her inhaler and her oxygen. And get her doctor's phone number. My kid sister met him and he said he was prepared to answer any questions she may have. She didn't have any. I, however, am the other daughter and I have lots of questions for him.

As serious as this is, though, I remain very grateful it's not lung cancer.

No definitive word on my mom, but ...

... damn, my nails look great! Behold Puerto Vallerta Violeta by OPI.

When I spoke to my mother, she sounded much, much better. She's feeling better, too, in that she's gone from sick and scared to bored and frustrated with being stuck in a hospital bed, hooked up to oxygen and an IV, and still no real diagnosis.

She has two doctors -- her internist and a gut specialist. We figure that means that they have ruled out the mega-serious stuff (like heart disease and lung cancer -- after all, no oncologist or cardiologist) and are leaning toward some sort of infection (like pneumonia or perhaps an ulcer). She knows from what she overheard that she has tests scheduled for tomorrow but hopes to be home Monday. I told her to take charge and ask her internist to explain all this to her. It would make her feel better.

Getting this pedi made me feel better. So did seeing the movie Made of Honor. It felt more than a little like a Lifetime TV movie, but so what? Sitting in the dark with Sno-Caps, gazing upon Patrick Dempsey, secure in the knowledge that I have bitchin' toenails, lifted my mood.

I love this photo

It's a study in boredom and exhaustion as experienced by the most glamorous couple ever. As near as I can tell, it was taken in during the off-year elections in 1962. The President and First Lady appear to be listening to a completely scintillating speech at a Democratic fundraiser. My guess is it was just another long evening in a long campaign season. I love how they're leaning into each other, as though each knows the other finds this painful. He looks bored beyond belief, like he's trying hard to send his mind to the happy place. She has an amused, "how corny" look.

I wonder if the Clintons, the McCains, and the Obamas can relate.

I'm overdosing on reality

Still no word on my mom's condition. Of course, it's still early on Saturday. I don't believe she's had the gastrointestinal tests yet. I must be patient.

But between her issues and my friend's dangerous experience of last week, I'm kinda weary, deep down in my bones. I don't want any of this to be happening. It's all too real. Suddenly life seems terribly fragile and fate seems capricious. And I feel helpless.

So I'm getting a pedicure. It seems like the only logical thing to do.

I'm so mad at my mom right now

She has been in the hospital since about 9:00 last night! She isn't in any pain, but she can't breathe. She's on oxygen and receiving antibiotics. They've run a million tests (chest xray, urinalysis and an electrocardiogram) and they still don't really know what's wrong with her. She's even had a blood transfusion!

I told her that, as of today, she no longer smokes.

It could be COPD. It could be her heart. It might be pneumonia. Emphysema is still being discussed. And all of these are exacerbated by her fucking cigs.

"I only smoke 6 a day. Maybe less." That's what she's been telling me for years. I always respond by saying if it's no big deal, then just stop. But my mother is very conflict averse. She'll say, "I will …" to avoid the argument, and light another cigarette.

Well now she's in the hospital. And I'm mad because she's my mommy and I still need her.

Grrrr!

I'm wound a little tight just now. Here's a brief overview of everything that's bugging me:

• I really do not trust -- and am not comfortable with -- one of the women I work with and I've been exposed to her too much lately. Leaves me feeling like Karen Silkwood. Give me the wire brush! I need a shower!

• I hate my fattitudinal fattiness.

• People are annoying and, as my oldest friend likes to say at times like this, "no damn good."

• The Cubs lost.

• It's still not Friday.

• I LIKED BROOKE! Why couldn't it have been Jason who went home?

• My best friend is at Jazz Fest in New Orleans, having fun, when he should be available to listen to me whine.

• I have never liked Madonna. Why is she staring out at me from all those magazine covers? Make her go away!

Yes, I'm PMS-ing. Draw your children closer. Lock your doors. No one is safe.

Come to think of it, even the fact that I still suffer PMS is bugging me!

Dammit! I'm 50! Fif-tee. Five-oh. Shouldn't this be behind by now? Instead of moodiness and edginess and a craving for peanut butter, shouldn't I be weepy and complaining about my hot flashes?

THURSDAY THIRTEEN #65 -- Ways I'm completely out of step with everyone else

THIRTEEN POPULAR THINGS
I SIMPLY DON'T GET

This is one of those times when “it’s not you, it’s me” is completely accurate. I realize the 13 things I list here are all enormously popular and have brought countless people joy, but I just don’t like them.

1. Seinfeld
2. Everybody (but me) Loves Raymond
3. Star Wars
4. Lord of the Rings
5. Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt
6. The 3 Stooges
7. The Food Channel
8. Sushi
9. Lager
10. Any wine I’m supposed to drink warm
11. The Auto Show
12. NCAA Basketball and “brackets”
13. Scrapbooking

If you’re fond of one of these 13 items, please don’t bother defending it. I won’t get what you say anyway. When it comes to these things, I’m hopelessly out of step. Instead, answer this question:

Is there a pop culture phenomenon that leaves you
scratching your headand asking, “huh?”

PS Sorry I didn't play along with this week's theme. I'm just a rebel, I guess.

Include your link in the comments and I'll add you here:
1. Ornery's Wife shares ways to live healthy
2. Hit the road with Nicholas
3. Anthony North shares the secrets about men
4. Sandee takes us around the Blogosphere
5. Malcolm shares some gems from his DVD collection
6. SJR takes an affectionate look at her favorite cop shows
7. Firefly Mom takes us back to the 1980s
8. Chelle has a LOVE-ly TT
9. Nicole Austin went off to a convention and shares tales, and photos!
10. Sandy Carlson shares an inspirational TT
11. Journeywoman goes househunting for her dreamhouse
12. Janet's TT is in fabulous taste
13. Lost Hemisphere features the work of his favorite photographer
14. Random Moments tempts us with "eye candy"
15. Bethany features intriguing images
16. Joyful Days has an important TT for those with little ones
17. Dane Bramage has some big plans
18. Claudia's TT takes us out into the garden
19. Lori's TT is very, very wise
20. It's All Good built her TT around the letter B
21. Crushed Glass has a seasonal TT
22. Ivanhoe's TT is all about friends
23. Lisa's TT is brought to us by the letter M


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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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Idol Observation

I didn't think I'd love tonight, as I've never been a big Neil Diamond fan. But it's turning out to be great fun after all:

• Paula got all discombobulated, reviewing Jason's second number before he did it. Gotta love live TV!

• The songs and performances are so cheesy it's almost as if I AM watching the Cubs play those cheesehead Brewers (who I feel guilty for skipping in favor of Idol). Brooke was delightfully corny on "I'm a Believer," Jason shook his dreds as he strummed and crooned "Forever in Blue Jeans" and Archuleta was like a human can of Cheeze Whiz with "Sweet Caroline" and "Coming to America."

• David Cook has completely won me over, and Brooke redeemed herself with her second number, "I Am, I Said."

• Poor Syeesha. I never remember anything about her once she finishes. Tonight isn't any different.

• Every week I'm fonder and fonder of Simon. Of the four onstage every week, he's the only one who seems honest and genuine (if also occasionally insensitive). He's the grumpy old prof you made fun of but really, secretly wanted to give you an A.

Buh-Bye

Obama 'outraged' and 'saddened' by Wright

Sen. Barack Obama said today he was appalled by the latest comments from his former pastor, who asserted that criticism of his fiery sermons is an attack on the black church and the U.S. government was responsible for the creation of the AIDS virus. (For more from the Chicago Tribune, click here.)

Hopefully now Rev. Jeremiah Wright will fade from view and we can pay attention to ISSUES, like whether or not to give drivers a summer vacation from the federal gas tax.

Another reason to love Lucy

One weekend morning earlier in the month, I was farting around on the Internet and watching I Love Lucy … again. I was amazed by how quickly the time flew, and how content I was, curled up on the sofa, playing Pogo, enjoying Lucy and Ricky and Ethel and Fred.

I googled the old girl and found Lucy-Desi.com, the official website for a museum in Lucy's hometown of Jamestown, NY. I thought that was just adorable. As with all really good museums, they have a gift shop, which can be accessed online. I impulsively ordered this nightshirt and alarm clock. I thought they would make mornings easier to take.

I forgot about this order until I received my credit card statement. Maybe it's impulse purchases like these that stop me from ever getting my finances in order, but never mind. That's not the point of this post.

I ordered that stuff back on 4/12! Where is it?
Damn those Lucy-Ricky shysters!
I'll make them sorry they screwed with THIS gal!

I called the museum gift shop just now without an order number, without item numbers, and demanded to know why my credit card had been charged.

The woman who worked at the gift shop was so nice, so patient, so willing to go the extra mile to check where my items were and when I could expect to receive them. With friendliness and grace she completely took all the haughty wind out of my "the customer is always right" sail.

So if there's a Lucy fan on your gift list, head over to Lucy-desi.com. They deserve your business because they are so nice. I don't know where Jamestown, NY, is exactly, but if I can ever get out there, I'm visiting the museum. Admission is just $6, and it looks like a terrific good time.

No, Sir, YOU are bombastic, and I wish this would all just go away

I work in Chicago and the village I live in touches the city limits, so I had heard of Trinity United Church of Christ before the Obama flap. One of my neighbors right here in this building worships there … the congregation was supportive in the sad search for Nailah Franklin … and my close friend John once worshipped there and left pretty fast. (His reasons are his own and I'm not going to explore them here.) The only person in these parts more famous than Obama -- one Ms. Oprah Winfrey -- also once worshipped at that church.

Because Jeremiah Wright is important in my neighborhood, and certainly important to my Party and my candidate, I watched his recent speeches and the Bill Moyers interview in their entirety. I have these observations:

1) I didn't find anything he had to say new, nor controversial, and I don't know what the fuss is about. After Tuskegee, it's not ridiculous for the Black community to be skeptical of what the government is capable of. No less a representative of our government than President Bill Clinton apologized for Tuskegee in 1997. I can separate the Rev.'s criticism of government policy from his love of country. It's similar to me hating the Iraq war but supporting the soldiers.

2) Yes, JFK and LBJ had accents and they weren't corrected while Black schoolchildren have been. I'm not offended by those accurate observations. I just don't know why we're focusing on that now, in the framework of the current Presidential campaign. Those are two long, long dead Presidents and Ebonics is not new, either.

3) Wright's message of reconciliation and acceptance is important and positive (not "divisive") and I enjoyed hearing it. Diversity can only enrich our lives, and I personally believe it's what Christ had in mind for us.

4) The minister I was closest to was my "spiritual mentor." He was dear to me and continues to have an impact on my life today, so watching Wright smirk and mock that type of relationship with his "voodoo" hand gestures annoyed me.

5) Members of the media haven't made fools of themselves by calling him "bombastic." They are not attacking the Black Church and its traditions by calling him "bombastic." They are attacking him. Jeremiah Wright is not the Pope -- he does not represent everyone of the United Church of Christ, much less all the many Blacks who attend different houses of worship. And watching how much this older gentleman enjoyed having all the cameras trained on him this past weekend, seeing how the bright lights and microphones seemed to feed his ego, I do believe him to be "pompous, pretentious and grandiose." That's how the dictionary describes "bombastic." Yup. That describes Reverend Wright.

6) He's entertaining, charismatic and he has enriched the lives of his congregants. I salute him for that. A smart man, gifted with exceptional people skills, he he has to know he's hurting Barack Obama, so I am also deeply suspicious of his motivation.

The more attention Jeremiah Wright receives, the more I long for the old days when Christ was our PERSONAL savior … when government was secular and we weren't all trying to convince one another that what we believe is what everyone should believe. These wedge issues have no place in the public square. Our forefathers had the right idea when they established the separation of Church and State:

"No religious test shall ever be required as a qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States."

Why should I care about Barack Obama's minister anyway? I find this, as well as that speech Romney gave late last year about his religion, very sad. I thought we put this issue behind us when JFK addressed his relationship with the Pope back in 1960.

For more about Rev. Wright's appearance this morning at the National Press Club, click here.

What a relief! For me, at least …

Just heard from the friend who had prostate cancer surgery. FINALLY! He sounded happy and on the mend. But little of his treatment has gone according to plan …

His "minor" surgery was scheduled for Friday, 4/18. He was supposed to be home sometime Saturday. The procedure itself was, in his doctor's words, "text book perfect." However, there was a problem with the anesthesia and his intestines shut down. Or, to be more precise, "didn't wake up" from the anesthesia.

So he's been in the hospital for more than a week, going through all kinds of painful and embarrassing procedures (which he detailed for me but, don't worry, I won't recount) and subsisting on IV fluids. His predominant look for spring so far has been a catheter, a tube in his nose and another in his arm.

I've been worried sick about him, afraid that the cancer had spread. Oh well, at least it wasn't THAT! And, now that he can keep food down and is able to walk a bit, he should be going home tomorrow.

On his mind

My nephew (a completely terrific second grader) has been having headaches again lately. They had plagued him a few months ago, but then he got glasses and they abated for a while. He's also been tearful at school, especially on the playground. He no longer seems to have any sense of humor when teased, as little boys will do at recess.

Today he and I had lunch together, just the two of us. I told him I had a craving for a hot dog. When we got to the restaurant counter, he eyed the menu carefully and asked if I planned on us both having hot dogs. I told him he could have whatever he wanted so he ordered a slice of plain cheese pizza, even though the hot dog was cheaper.

As we ate, he told me about his upcoming summer vacation at a lake in Wisconsin. His dad (my brother-in-law) recently began a new job after a long period of unemployment and hasn't accrued any vacation time. My nephew says he understands why Daddy will only be able to drive them out on Saturday morning but has to turn around and leave them on Sunday, but he doesn't like it. He says he "really needs" his father with him when he's on vacation.

On the way back, we agreed it would be nice if we brought something back for Grandma (my mom). We stopped at Subway and picked up a ham sandwich on wheat. He knows what Grandma likes, so he asked for lettuce … and American cheese … and pickles … and tomatoes … and that was it. I mentioned that it might be pretty dry without mayonnaise, and he responded that he knew "for a fact" that Grandma had mayonnaise in her refrigerator and he didn't want to "waste money" on something she had at her house. I told him it was OK -- that Subway doesn't charge extra for mayo.

First he wonders if it's OK to order the more expensive pizza, then he expresses how much he'll miss his dad while on vacation -- even though he understands the situation, and he's concerned about wasting money on condiments. I worry that he headaches and tearfulness are because he's concerned about his family's finances.

I mentioned all this to my mom. Hopefully she'll find a way to broach the subject with my kid sister (who doesn't appreciate my commentary or tips about childrearing). I know there are unfortunate realities about their household finances that she wants him to understand, but I would hate for it to weigh too heavily on him.

It's a lot for a second grader to have on his mind.

Still first in the NL Central … and first in my heart

It was a not completely successful road trip (2-3), but it was still entertaining:

• Kerry Wood, God bless him, got a win in Colorado!
• In DC, Reed Johnson made one of the greatest catches I've ever seen. (Check it out here.)
• Ted Lilly seems to have hit his stride, even though today was a losing effort.

Obviously there were games when we fell behind, but we were never out of it. Naturally I'd prefer it if we didn't strand so many baserunners, but it's still early. And we're still in first place!

Enjoy your Monday off, gentlemen. You deserve it.

I declare myself tagged

No Nonsense Girl says you're tagged if you want to play, and I meet that requirement …

1. What is your occupation? Associate Creative Director
2. What color are your socks right now? I'm not wearing socks
3. What are you listening to right now? At this very moment, a Capital One TV commercial
4. What was the last thing that you ate? A 3 Musketeers bar, and I feel very guilty about it
5. Can you drive a stick shift? nope
6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Blue … specifically Cobalt Blue, if it's still in the 64 Crayola box
7. Last person you spoke to on the phone? Haven't been on the phone yet today … busy running errands. Last person I spoke to live and in person was the receptionist at the veterinarian's office
8. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Yes, I do.
9. Favorite drink? Classic Coke
10. What is your favorite sport to watch? Chicago Cubs baseball
11. Have you ever dyed your hair? Dear God, yes. I added it up and I have spent more than a month of my life with dye on my hair! That's why I've "gone natural."
12. Pets? Joey, Charlotte and Reynaldo -- all shelter adopt cats
13. Favorite food? Hot dog.
14. Last movie you watched? Smart People with Sarah Jessica Parker and Dennis Quaid.
15. Favorite Day of the year? My birthday!
16. What do you do to vent anger? A nice, long shower
17. What was your favorite toy as a child? My Lassie dog
18. What is your favorite, fall or spring? Fall
19. Hugs or kisses? Depends on who it is
20. What kind of pie? Strawberry rhubarb
21. Living arrangements? Alone in a condo
22. When was the last time you cried? I don't remember
23. What is on the floor of your closet? All kinds of crap
24. Favorite smell? Cinnamon, or Lovely by Sarah Jessica Parker
25. What inspires you? Justice
26. What are you afraid of? Dying in a plane crash
27. Plain, cheese or spicy hamburgers? Cheese
28. Favorite car? none
29 Favorite cat breed? Any cat who needs a home is my favorite -- screw the breed
30. Number of keys on your key ring? 10, though 2 of them no longer work in the locks so I should throw them out
31. How many years at your current job? It was 4 years on St. Patrick's Day
32. Favorite day of the week? Saturday
33. How many states have you lived in? 1
34. How many countries have you been to? 6

Break my heart

I'm watching a segment of Biography on Marlon Brando. I appreciate that he was talented, a genius, even. An icon who revolutionized everything from film acting to fashion. (Where would I be without t-shirts and jeans?) But most of all, dear God …

HE WAS SOOOOOO GORGEOUS!

How did he end up as he did? Was he trying to destroy the shell that made him famous? Or did he just love Big Macs?

I will think about this further as I do about a dozen leg lifts …

A Good Quiz to Take …

… to help diffuse the tension while watching a nerve-wracking Cubs game (tied 3-3 at the top of the 8th). Naturally, I found it at Kwizgiver's.

IN CASE YOU WONDERED …

What company made your bra? Playtex (Secrets Signature Floral Underwire in beige)

Who is your favorite relative? That's very hard, but right now -- at this very moment -- my youngest nephew

What annoys you most? Rudeness

Who is the most important person in your life? Another tough one, but right now -- at this very moment -- my best friend

Name one thing you used to do that you are not proud of. Cocaine

Who is the best country artist of all time? Patsy Cline ("I've got these little things, she's got you …")

When's your bed time? 1-ish.

Have you ever had surgery? Yes. Uterine fibroids. It wasn't fun, but it wasn't that serious, either, so I lived to tell the tale.

Is any of your family embarassing? Oh, yes!

What country would you like to visit? England

If you won the lottery, would you give a two weeks notice? Yes

Is weed a drug? Yes

Do you believe in God? Yes

Would you pay five dollars for a gallon of gas? No. I don't have a car, so what would I do with it?

Would you fight for our freedom if asked by this nation? No

Can you lick your nose with your tongue? No

How much alcohol do you drink on a weekly basis? This week (Monday-Friday): one beer and one mixed drink

Would you rather have Marge as a mother, or Homer as a dad? Marge

Do you believe that what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas? Yes

What's the furthest you've ever been from what you consider "home"? Switzerland

What's your Windows desktop? I'm on a Mac

Have you ever used the patch or gum to try and quit smoking? No, because I've never smoked

What do you REALLY think is going to happen between Heidi and Spencer? I don't watch the Hills, so I don't have an opinion. I do know that once whatever it is happens, I'll find out about it from US magazine.

What's your favorite CSI: Vegas, Miami, or New York? Miami. Though I've never seen New York …

What was the last reason you clapped? Trying to get my naughty cat's attention

Do you have Tivo or DVR? no

What was the last video game you watched someone play? Does Sims count?

Do you paint your nails random colors? No

Whens the last time you ate dinner with your family? Saturday, April 12

Whens the last time you went to Staples? Months ago

Who was the last person who said they loved you? Edgardo

Did you root for the Giants or Patriots in the last superbowl? No

Do you have Netflix? No

Do you like Sci-fi movies? Not even Star Wars

What did you do over last spring break? A spa retreat in Atlanta

What do you think is the most boring sport? NASCAR

Have you ever been to a real NFL football game? Yes ("Bear down, Chicago Bears …")

Whats the last big test you took? Before this one? Last Sunday ("What Your Taste in Chocolate Says about You")

What is the color of the chair you sitting in? I'm not on a chair, I have settled in on my green sofa, Troy

What were you almost named? Jack

What time did u wake up this morning? 6:45

Do you like showering in the morning or at night? Morning

What pair of shoes did you were today? Sandals

Ever done a science fair project? Good goobies, yes! Didn't enjoy them, but they were unavoidable.

What brand of deodorant do you use? Dove

Ever been in a lighthouse? Yes

What are you eating for dinner tonight? Tuna salad sandwich, which I didn't really like because it had too many onions.

How's your day been? It will go from OK to GREAT if my Cubs manage to win this one ...

The happiest 30¢ I could ever spend

On my way back from the gym and McDonald's to my office, I always see the MERRIEST homeless guy. Always in the same spot, beside a row of newspaper vending machines. Our relationship started by him calling out to me, asking if I'll share my lunch with him. I said "no," he laughed and said "God bless you!" and wished me a nice day anyway. This went on for quite a while.

He's so dependable and pleasant that lately I've begun saving the coins I get as change from my lunch to drop in his cup. "Hi, Darlin'!" he calls. It's never more than 30¢, but it seems to make him so HAPPY! I say, "You know our deal, don't you?" And he says, "Yes. You keep the sandwich and I keep the change." And he asks God to bless me and wishes me a nice day.

I wonder how he got here, and why the circumstances that left him homeless haven't made him sullen or angry. I think if, one day, he wasn't out there, I would miss him.

How hard can it be to make a phone call?

While I don't expect my old boss to be all "bright-eyed and bushy-tailed" after last Friday's prostate surgery, I wonder how exhausting it would be for him to just pick up the phone and let me know he's OK. I've been trying to respect his privacy, but every day it gets harder. Since it's been a week, I don't think it will be so bad if I give in and call him.

There's another call on my mind, too. It's one that I really ought to initiate, but I've been putting it off and putting it off. So I guess I shouldn't be too hard on my old boss.

A former coworker tracked me down and asked me if I was interested in perhaps doing some freelance writing for him. As we exchanged chatty emails, he brought me up to date on his life. His second wife of 4 years or so has been diagnosed with non-Hodgkin's lymphoma and is not doing well.

I really should call him, or at least send a more thoughtful email that addresses her illness. But I've been putting it off because, strangely enough, I feel a certain amount of pressure to be sensitive and wise. Here's the thing -- when this man and I first met, his cat was very ill and died. He told me WHY the cat was so important to him …

Years earlier, when he was going through a divorce precipitated by his alcoholism, he discovered a stray cat hiding in the warehouse area of the company he worked for. He brought it back to his tiny new apartment. It was just the two of them. Knowing that the cat had no one else in the world, he decided to really quit drinking so he could be a really responsible pet owner. He believed that finding that cat, and realizing the cat depended on him, literally helped save his life. Therefore seeing his feline buddy lose its life was especially hard for him.

Apparently I was sensitive to his loss and said all the right things when that cat died. My former coworker mentioned it in his emails to me. Now that the man's WIFE is dying, I feel a great deal of pressure to say all the right things again.

So I guess that's the answer to the question I posed way back at the beginning of this post -- "How hard can it be to make a phone call?" Pretty damn hard sometimes. Pretty damn hard.

THURSDAY THIRTEEN #64 -- Welcome to the Windy City

13 REASONS

TO VISIT

CHICAGO

This week the TT theme is vacations and destinations, and I'm responding with an unabashed Valentine to the city I know best, the one I travel to and from every day for both work and pleasure – Chicago. Since I can’t imagine why everyone doesn’t want to live here,* it stands to reason I believe everyone should at least vacation in Chicago. Here are thirteen reasons why:

1. It’s easy to get here. Today, when everyone except the most casual flyer has an airline horror story, that’s important. You can get to Chicago (either O’Hare or Midway) from almost any major city without having to make a connection. You can also get here by Amtrak. (And probably Greyhound bus, but I’ve never done it.)

2. You don’t need a car to get around. In fact, trust me on this, it’s easier to get to and from the destinations I list here without a car. Only stubborn, gas-guzzling suburbanites insist on driving downtown, and frankly, we mock them. Cabs, public transportation and the tourist-friendly Chicago Trolley are all cheaper and believe me, you won’t miss the agita of looking for parking, nor will you be shocked when you see how expensive fuel can be when you add Cook County taxes. And perhaps I’m corny on this point, but every time you get on a commuter bus or train, you’re helping the environment.

3. Millennium Park. 103 N. Michigan Ave. Because I go past it every day, twice a day to and from the office, I completely take it for granted. And that’s a sin, because it truly is gorgeous. There’s “The Bean,” a way-cool sculpture actually titled Cloud Gate. There’s the amazing Crown Fountain, where diverse and ever-changing portraits of Chicagoans look out onto a reflecting pool. (And “spit” water for children to splash around in, as shown above.) There’s the Park Grill, a great place to enjoy drinks and a meal as you watch the city go by. And best of all there’s the PARK. The trees, the flowers … Shame on me for not admiring what I have at my disposal every day!

4. Wrigley Field. Clark and Addison. Home of the Chicago Cubs. The enduring cathedral of baseball, one of the last parks still standing where the Babe played. Christened “the friendly confines” by Ernie Banks, its ivy-covered walls give you a beautiful place to spend an evening or, better yet, an afternoon. Enjoy a beer or two, a couple hotdogs and a rousing chorus of “Go, Cubs, Go!” Wear blue.

5. Navy Pier. 600 E. Grand. A terrific place for people watching! You can take a booze cruise on the Lake, or ride the 150-foot high ferris wheel (which gives you an awesome view of both the city and the Lake), eat in a gazillion casual restaurants, see a movie on the IMAX Screen and maybe even take in a little Shakespeare. Moms and Dads, there’s a great Children’s Museum here, too. You can literally spend hours and hours at Navy Pier without getting bored. (Though as a native, I try to get out before the sun goes down because it becomes very, very touristy then.) But beware – there have been mime spottings.

6. Sears Tower. 233 S. Wacker. “On a clear day, you can see forever …” OK, in this case, on a clear day you can see about 50 miles. Let me be honest with you – there’s more to do in the area around the competitive John Hancock Building on Michigan Avenue. But the Sears Tower Sky Deck is just so much cooler and you can see further.

7. Museum of Science and Industry. 57th and Lake Shore Drive. My absolute favorite when I was a kid, and the absolute favorite of a new generation of kids today. The baby chick hatchery I loved so is still there (with new chicks, of course) as is the human heart you can actually walk through. There’s a real-live, captured Nazi submarine and one of the Apollo spacecrafts, too. Thinking about it now makes me want to go back.

8. The Field Museum. 1400 S. Lake Shore Drive. Don’t let the name fool you – it’s named for the Marshall Field family, not because it’s devoted to flora and fauna. Although the star of the museum is a pretty damn big example of “fauna.” You just gotta visit Sue, our T-Rex. Really, she’s the largest and most complete dinosaur ever assembled and she completely rocks. (I can’t get over how tiny her “arms” were …) In addition to just taking in the wonder of Sue, there are exhibits about how she was discovered and what her dino life must have been like. I think Sue is reason enough to go, but the Field also features special, limited-time-only exhibits. In years gone by, I’ve seen Jacqueline Kennedy’s wardrobe there, as well as an extraordinary exhibit about the history of baseball. As an adult, this one is favorite museum.

9. The American Girl Store. (American Girl Place) 111 E. Chicago. Looking for an antidote to the dubious images of girlhood sold by Bratz dolls? Bring your daughter here! Historically accurate and culturally diverse, the American Girl dolls and this store celebrate what makes us individual, as well as what we have shared, generation to generation. This place not only sells all the dolls and all their accessories, it has a theater and a café and special events for special little girls. I firmly believe that my niece, now 15 and patriotic and very socially involved, began “getting” what it meant to be an American Girl while playing with these dolls and reading their stories. Especially Molly and Kit, who inspired her to discuss what girlhood was like for her own Depression-era grandmothers. (Of course, now that my niece is in high school, she’s into camouflage and Green Day, so sadly, our AG days are behind us.) I’ll stop singing its praises now, except to add that Kit as portrayed by Abigail Breslin is jumping to the Big Screen (when else?) over the 4th of July weekend. If you have an American Girl lover in your life, seeing the movie and coming to this store could be highlights of her summer.

10. World-class restaurants. Have we had enough culture? Ready to eat, drink and be merry? Chicago offers plenty of places for that. Beef, pizza, seafood, pasta, fusion, even (ick!) sushi – we’ve got it all, and at a wide range of prices. I recommend you pick up a copy of Chicago magazine or ask your concierge for recommendations. That way you’ll find the spots that deliver the best of Chicago, if not the ones that are most popular with tourists. (For example, I recommend Ina’s on West Randolph. Known for her breakfasts, people often forget about Ina’s for lunch and dinner – maybe because the kitchen closes at 9:00 PM. I’ve had some of the best roast duck and salmon dishes EVER at Ina’s.)

11. World-class theater. I’m a big fan of our “Broadway in Chicago” series, and have seen everything from Wicked to Jersey Boys. We also have the Goodman and the Lookingglass Theaters. Often less commercial, but always the highest quality, these theaters are the stage homes to John Mahoney, Joan Allen, Laurie Metcalf, David Schwimmer and more.

12. Second City on North Wells. This is where it all began for everyone who makes us laugh today: Stephen Colbert, Steve Carrell, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Bill Murray, the Brothers Belushi, and oh, my fingers are getting tired from listing all the talent. The new crop is facile and funny and topical and terrific. Oh, and definitely adult, so don’t bring the wee ones.

13. Jer-ry! Jer-ry! Judge Mathis, too. Both of these shows tape here in Chicago and it’s not impossible to get tickets. It is impossible to get tickets for Oprah, so don’t even ask.

There are many more reasons, including Buckingham Fountain and The Art Institute, but since it's called the Thursday Thirteen, I'll stop here.

*Yeah, yeah. In winter, we get snow. Whatever. Most of the people who complain about the snow live in warm, sunny climes plagued by wildfires, mudslides, major earthquakes and hurricanes. When our snow melts, our homes are reliably still there. So just shaddup.

Include your link in the comments sections, and I'll add you here:
OR MAYBE I WON'T. My computer is running soooooo slow today it may be difficult. I apologize if I pass you by. Unless you are one of the unfortunates who insist on mentioning snow even though I advised you to shut up about it above. Then I may just delete you. Why? Because it's my blog, and I'm its despot.
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