Thursday Thirteen #456

Well, this is random. Amazon is top of mind because they're having a Big Spring Sale. Here are the contents of 13 recent Amazon deliveries. 

1. RoC Retinol Night Serum Capsules. Only I don't use it at night. 

2. Toe separators. Okay, maybe this is weird. I noticed in the tub that the big toe on my left foot – the foot with the bunion – rubs against the next toe. Who knew that a company name Welnove makes a little blue washable toe separator?

3. Ethernet cable. It is what it is.

4. 48 tubes of lip balm. I put these in the blessing bags I give local panhandlers.

5. Small plastic litter pan. This is not for my cats. (I mean, small? For Roy Hobbs?) It was sent to an animal shelter in Kankakee for their supply drive after the March 10 tornado.

6. Nike Revolution 8 Shoes. Still breaking them in, but I'm hopeful.

7. Compression socks. Seems I'm fixated on my feet lately, doesn't it? These help with the heel pain I've been suffering due to disc issues.

8. 50 blank folded cards. I use these for my Letters Against Isolation cards.

9. Airtight cereal storage container. But not for cereal. This is to prevent Roy Hobbs from tearing into the bag of cat food, gorging himself, and throwing up. Yes, he's smart. But I have opposing thumbs and can work the latch!

10. GUM dental picks. I could have purchased these at Walgreen's, but it was a bit of a walk and the weather was challenging and I had another Amazon delivery coming anyway and oh, what the hell.

11. "This blanket is a hug to you." I had a purple one sent to my Cousin Rose after she had knee surgery. She took a selfie using it, which made me happy.

12. Organic honey and oatmeal cream. I ordered this to treat a raised red patch on my arm. I don't know what caused the rash, but this seemed to work. (I seem to respond well to oatmeal in these situations.)

13. Air purifier for the bedroom. I don't know that my air needs purifying, but it can't hurt, right?

Do you often come home to Amazon packages on your doorstep?  

 

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

 

Does she want to be alone?

I thought I was writing an inoffensive email. I was touching base with my aunt/Godmother, who has had health problems lately. I wanted to make her feel supported. I also wanted to show her a photo of Violet, my grandniece, with Violet's cousins, who had come to Michigan over Spring break to meet the baby. 

I used this TV theme song as my entrée. If you're a Boomer, you know it. Patty Duke portrayed "identical cousins," which is, of course, genetically impossible. This theme is as memorable as the show was stupid. 

I was chatty. I talked about how the lyrics to this theme were running through my head all week:

•  First with the Oscars and Sinners. I reminded her that I've been madly Oscar obsessed since I was a little girl and remain so, so naturally I saw Michael B. Jordan's winning performance for playing twins. I mentioned how amazed I am by how far the technology had come since the 1960s when Patty Duke played COUSINS, identical cousins! I asked her if she remembered the song.

•  Then with the photo of Baby Violet and her California, which I attached. I knew if it wasn't for me my aunt wouldn't see it because she has MAGA'd their mothers to death. They no longer communicate with her because my aunt is legit unable to converse without shoe-horning her hostile politics into every conversation. (Spoiler alert: she's about to do it to me. Keep reading.)

I closed the email with an update about the resolution of my problems at the card shop. I was happy to report that I'm able to sit during my shifts because of my bad back, and that Corporate HR couldn't have been nicer about it. "Of course they are. Because I'm a senior citizen and they're afraid I'll sue." I was joking, of course. I made $4,800 at this job in 2025. I'm certainly not about to sue anyone over this!

Auntie answered right away.  No mention of The Patty Duke Show, which made me sad because I was sure that shot of nostalgia would have made her smile. 

But she didn't watch the Oscars because the political posturing of Hollywood turns her off, and she doesn't want to see what the celebrities "are wearing, or most likely, not wearing." My comment about HR reminded her of "all the woke garbage" when she worked for Motorola, where "a black woman engineer was automatically golden." She liked the photo of Baby Violet and the California Cousins and said she kinda misses her only cousin, Sandy, but she hasn't heard from Sandy since last May. (Gee! I wonder why.)

She went on to detail her medical problems, which included a recent trip to the ER for vomiting and stomach pains. She's OK now, but I appreciate that this must have terrifying.

She will be 80 in May.* She is estranged from her oldest son and his kids because she can't stop being, in her adult granddaughter's words, "a racist homophobe." She has a great grandchild she's never held. My kid sister and my niece don't want anything to do with her since she called my niece and nephew "freeloaders" for their participation in Biden's tuition repayment plan. 

At least she still has me. But for fuck's sake, can't she remove her red MAGA hat for the half hour it takes to respond to my email? She didn't have to slam the Oscars, which she knows I watched and enjoyed. I gave her The Patty Duke Show off ramp. She could have just said she was happy for me, getting the stool at work. Or she could have asked what was wrong with my back. But no, she went with "the woke garbage." (BTW, I had referred to myself as "a senior citizen" because that usually makes her laugh. "You're my sweet baby niece and Goddaughter! How can you be a senior citizen?")

I have news for my Auntie. Come Mother's Day and her birthday in May, she can count on gifts from one person, and it's not Donald Trump. 

I am stubborn and I refuse to let her go. But I wish she'd stop tempting me.

I know that our President likes to chide people like me for Trump Derangement Syndrome, but it's MAGA that takes over people's lives. I don't go to the blogs of right-wingers and tell them why they're wrong, yet people have done that here. I don't tell my aunt I don't respect her beliefs, but she can't resist slagging mine. There's an inherent lack of respect, a need to make enemies out of others, that MAGA inspires. 

I can see that my aunt is lonely and I know she's not stupid. I just don't see why she can't connect the dots.

*Or maybe 79.