This is the 16th time I've mentioned this song on my humble blog. Recorded definitively by Barbra Streisand, it includes the Laura Nyro lyric that encapsulates exactly how I feel when it seems life is getting away from me: "Never mind the forecast for the sky has lost control/and the fury and the broken thunder's come to match my raging soul."
I don't feel like detailing everything that's weighing on me right now. It does no good. If you're interested in the litany, this post is a good place to start. Right now it feels like everyone around me is hurting, like everything is spiraling downward, and I am helpless to stop any of it. So I decided to concentrate on what I can change. First on the list is my hideous bathroom.
It's half done. It's been half done for more than a year. New toilet, new sink, new medicine chest. Old bathroom tiles, old shower rod, old towel racks. I hate it. It's a depressing way to start the day. I was going to use my tax refund to finally, FINALLY finish it.
New tiles, new fixtures will come to $5,000. I got an estimate! I was excited, fantasizing about a new fresh, clean way to start the day.
Then the boom dropped. This building needs two new washers and dryers and a new elevator. There's a BIG special assessment coming.
There goes my new bathroom.
I know, I know. Compared to things like losing one's home or losing one's breasts, my problems are not as big those swirling around me.
I should value how much better my gut is doing. Finally. After all these months I think I'm getting better. I should concentrate on that more.
But I admit, I'm tired. This is just another thing. Just another rotten, unfair thing. The hits just keep on coming.
