Sunday, April 24, 2016

Barb called!

We talked for about a half hour and I heard her laugh, so I feel better.

The cancer surgery went well. The lump was very small and it was caught early. The reason for the double mastectomy is that she tested positive for the BRCA gene and she and her doctors agreed it would be better to act aggressively. And as of today, both she and her doctors are confident that they got it all.

It's the reconstructive surgery that has thrown a wrench in the works. She had expanders put in to prepare her chest for implants, and there's been some irritation and infection at the site. So she's been on pain killers longer than was originally expected and it's been hard for her to raise her arms to wash her own hair. But she's getting better every day. Still, she's looking at another month before she can go back to work.

She mentioned that her husband spends nights on the sofa because her sleep is still so fitful and she needs all the pillows to get comfortable. But she sounds like they're getting along well. She laughed when she told me how his schedule revolves around, "walking dogs and walking Barb."

I let her know that I think of her every day. I told her if she gets bored to call me any time. She promised she would, and thanked me for the cards and nightshirt.

I'm feeling so relieved since hearing from her.

Sunday Stealing

Ask Questions, Yo

1. Are you a very open or private person? Depends where I am and who I'm talking to. I'm very blabby and can talk about current affairs and celebrities, which gives appearance that I'm open and friendly. But at the end of the conversation, strangers know little about me.

2. Change one thing about the world what would it be?
That people would live their religious faith -- whatever faith that may be -- rather than proselytizing. Living one's faith brings us together, trying to recruit sets up an "us vs. them" that is not healthy.

3. Live in any country/city, where would you choose? I love Chicago and would never leave. But if I could live anywhere in this city, I'd choose the Palmolive Building. It's a beautiful art deco building from the 1930s. It's historic -- the light you see is The Lindbergh Beacon, added way back when to help aviators navigate over Lake Michigan, and it was also the headquarters of Playboy back in its heyday. And my view would either be Michigan Avenue or the Oak Street Beach! Now all I need is $14 million for a condo unit.

4. What perfume do you wear?
Exceptional. It's crisp and rather uncommon.

5. How are you feeling right now?
Happy. I've got the windows open and I can hear church bells.

6. If money was no object, where would you move to?
Shit, I answered this already. See #3.

7. Who was the last person to make you cry?
The Cubs Kyle Schwarber. This terrific kid suffered a season-ending injury in game three of the year, before the Cubs even got home to Wrigley Field. On Opening Day, he came out on crutches and nearly 40,000 fans got their feet to wish him a speedy recovery. I get verklempt just thinking about it.

8. What age do people usually mistake you for?
Late 40s. Which makes me happy because I'm a fat old broad in my late-50s.

9. Is there a song which can bring you to tears instantly?
I'm not much of a crier, but "Save the Best for Last" will do it. I so loved the man that song reminds me of. Still do. Wherever he is, I hope he's happy.

10. Do you play video games?

11. What do you think about before you go to bed?
Whatever I'm reading

12. Have you ever online dated?

13. Do you get cranky when you’re hungry?

14. What drink did you last consume?

15. Have you ever tripped while walking up the stairs?
Ever? Of course. I've been going up stairs for a half century.

16. Is there something you’re happy about at the moment?
Yes. Right now both my cats are healthy and happy and within my sightline, so my life is good.

17. Are you a shy person?
Not shy, but I am introverted.

18. Were you happy when you woke up today?

19. Do you like rain?

20. Can you go a day without music?
Not willingly

It's a gift to be gotten

By "gotten" I mean understood.

I've got a lot of emotional "stuff"going on. Mainly I'm wrestling with news about Connie and the radio silence from Barb.

•  With Connie, I'm trying to be a responsible, vigilant guardian while still living in and enjoying the moment.

•  With Barb, I'm trying to balance her need for privacy right now with letting her know she has my support.

I have financial issues, too. And work is more roller-coastery than is comfortable. And ... and ... and ... I'm trying to stay positive and face forward. (After all, I've got the Cubs!)

And right now, it's good to know how heavily I can lean on my oldest friend. She knows me so well, knows my history, knows I need to laugh and be distracted and knows just how to do it.

She has shit going on in her own life. She always does. She's one of those people who lives in perpetual chaos.

But she's able to put it aside for me right now, and I treasure her for it. I just wish she was here. I won't see her until late summer. I can't wait!