The sky is clear and blue. The mercury is grazing 70ยบ. The sun is bright. I downloaded my favorite Bob Dylan song ("Lily, Rosemary and the Jack of Hearts") onto my iPod, so life is good, right?
At times. If I can just stay in the moment. If I can just keep concentrating on the here and now of this sunny Sunday, I'm happy.
I'm wrestling with whether or not I currently have a career or just a job. I miss my best friend, who is moving and I feel so desolate and vulnerable without him. My mom's health is deteriorating in small but inexorable ways. Bird flu. Iraq. The Cubs have lost 5 games straight, and this 6th isn't looking too promising, either.
Two friends told me (independently, as they barely know each other and couldn't have compared notes) that they are worried about me, and that I should remember how many people I have in my life who care about me.
They're right. I have a hearty network of friends and I am grateful for them. And the sunshine. And cold beer when I'm watching baseball. And how adorable my cats are.
If only I can stay in the moment, if I can avoid worrying about tomorrow and Tuesday and Wednesday and beyond, if I can actually feel the good things that surround me, I'm happy. Focus, focus, focus. Don't let this moment slip away without enjoying it.
