Movie Monday

This week's movie topic is all about Weight...

Share on your blog movies featuring those who want to lose or need to gain extra pounds, linking back here for others to see.

Death Becomes Her. Fat Goldie loses Bruce Willis to willowy but bitchy Meryl Streep, and loses a ton to get him back. (Yes, that really is Goldie Hawn. I swear!)

The Mirror Has Two Faces. Babs works out like a demon to look hot for hubby Jeff Bridges, though to be honest, I didn't feel she looked especially pudgy before all that time at the gym. (Maybe she added muscle tone.)

Bridget Jones' Diary. Oh, how she agonized about her weight! It made her so easy for me to relate to!

Two unexpected expenses

Oh, goodie. Found out this weekend that my eyes have gotten worse over the last year. So instead of spending $100 this month for replacement contact lenses, I am spending more than $600 on new glasses and a new set of lenses. I economized this year over last year -- this year's glasses cost the same as last year's, even though I added photogray lenses, because I stayed "on the wall" and rejected the saleslady's entreaties to select a pair of more expensive frames "from the case."

Then the air purifier tower in my bedroom started grumbling and rumbling. Even with a clean filter, the noise continued. So I know it's just the motor has worn out. No surprise, really, since of the two towers I bought a couple years ago, it's the one nearest the cat's commode (and I have three cats and two boxes) so it's been working extra-hard for more than two years. I comparison shopped and ordered another one from Overstock because it was cheaper in both sticker price and shipping cost than Amazon. I paid with Paypal so that I could use the money I raised by selling books on eBay toward the new appliance.

Both the glasses and the air purifier are important for my health and I want to economize, but not scrimp. Still, I'm not happy that I spent more than $700 on stuff I didn't really budget for and certainly didn't enjoy this weekend.

Oh, well ... sometimes it sucks to be a grown up!

Tuckered out

I don't recall how we got onto the subject last night, but my mother was talking about how great anti-depressants are. I don't necessarily disagree, having been on them for just over three years myself. But my mother was rhapsodizing how much better they work than talk therapy. "I'm one of those people who puts my past behind me."

One: I don't intend to be on anti-depressants for the rest of my life, the way my mother is. This is a result of menopause. When it's safe for me to cast them aside, I shall.

Two: She knows how long I've been in therapy, and how important it is/has been to me. I think she feels I blame her, because the thought of my therapy makes her defensive. It leaves me weary.

Three: My mom has said some really crappy things to me over the last six-eight months. I have chalked it up to her still dealing with stuff ... especially her anger at her sister-in-law, my Aunt Jo. My aunt wants to have a closer relationship with me, and my mother sees red whenever she hears my aunt's name (even though they haven't spent time together since the Clinton Administration). If she, like Charlie Sheen, is able to cure herself with her mind and just put her past behind her, then why is she so pissy?

I confronted her about #3 Saturday night. I told her I'm not trying to change her, that I love her as she is, but that she really does have to be haunted by the people and things from her past because they do color her present. That her anger overrides her compassion and common sense and she blurts things that hurt my feelings.

She said she was sorry, that she didn't realize I was "so sensitive," that when certain subjects come up she doesn't even include me "in the equation," and that from now on she will be more careful. She reiterated that she does love me, and I reminded her that I love her and sometimes still need a mommy. Hurtful things bother me more when they come from her because she's supposed to love me, she's supposed to have my back.

I am glad we cleared the air, I hope she is, too, but it's left me tired, tired, tired.