
I told her that, as of today, she no longer smokes.
It could be COPD. It could be her heart. It might be pneumonia. Emphysema is still being discussed. And all of these are exacerbated by her fucking cigs.
"I only smoke 6 a day. Maybe less." That's what she's been telling me for years. I always respond by saying if it's no big deal, then just stop. But my mother is very conflict averse. She'll say, "I will …" to avoid the argument, and light another cigarette.
Well now she's in the hospital. And I'm mad because she's my mommy and I still need her.