And I ... eee... I ... eee ... I will always love you ...

Today is Greg Maddux' 44th birthday. Celebrate accordingly.

Ten Things Tuesday

Ten random things about me, in random order, shared because I haven't stolen anything from Kwizgiver in such a long time!

1) I hate going to work out, but am always glad I did.

2) I don't drink anywhere near enough water at home, but I do manage to swig it at work.

3) I am ridiculously sentimental and save voice mails forever, just so I can relive how loved ones sound.

4) My cologne is Lovely by Sarah Jessica Parker.

5) I don't know which embarrasses me more -- my awful singing voice or my complete lack of coordination.

6) I have a crush on a completely imaginary person -- Archie Goodwin, Nero Wolfe's assistant. While reading the novels, I wonder how Archie would have described me, if we were ever to meet.

7) I am obsessed with my coral pedi. This isn't exactly the color, but it's close.

8) Sunday night I spent nearly two hours going through stacks of papers and unread magazines (tossing the ones from 2009), all the while watching episodes of Hoarding: Buried Alive on TLC. I appreciate irony.

9) Over the span of my life, I have named cats (in order of appearance) Big Tom, Little Tom, Annie, Arthur, Wilma, Allison, Tara, Billy, and (currently) Joey, Charlotte and Reynaldo. I don't believe in giving pets names like "Fluffy" or "Fido."

10) I am terribly sad about Simon Cowell leaving American Idol.

If you decide to share 10 random things about yourself, let me know so I can check them out.

Cool! She finally speaks for herself.

Post-assassination interviews with Jacqueline Kennedy to be unsealed

Shown: Arthur Schlesinger Jr. and Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis spoke at a February 1978 party in New York City.

By Martin Finucane, Globe Staff

Just a few months after the assassination of President John F. Kennedy, his widow, Jacqueline Kennedy, sat down for a series of interviews about him.

Now, 50 years later, the public will find out what she said about her husband, his work, and life in the White House during an administration that was cut cruelly short. The interviews, strictly sealed after they were conducted, will be the basis of a new book slated for publication in September 2011, the John F. Kennedy Library Foundation announced today.

The seven interviews were conducted in the spring of 1964 by historian and Kennedy aide Arthur M. Schlesinger Jr. They were part of an oral history project that captured the memories of those close to the president, who was assassinated in Dallas in November 1963, the foundation said.

The interviews cover a wide range of topics, the foundation said, including Kennedy's early campaigns, the Cuban missile crisis, Mrs. Kennedy's evolving sense of herself and her role as first lady, family life in the White House, and the president's plans for a second term.

The book, to be published by Hyperion, will be edited and introduced by Caroline Kennedy, and the family plans to make both the interview transcripts and 6 1/2 hours of audio recordings available.

Jacqueline Kennedy "believed in my father, his vision for America, and in the art of politics. She felt it was important to share her knowledge and excitement with future generations. It is a privilege for me to honor the memory of my parents by making this unique history available," Caroline Kennedy, president of the foundation, said in a statement.

From boston.com

It's a beautiful sight

Behold the first Cubs' home game home run, sailing over the heads of the faithful during the third inning yesterday within the Friendly Confines.

My world is a better place when there's Cubs baseball in it.

Movie Monday

Best Couples

This week we're thinking of couples in films that left their mark because of their romantic tension, squabbling or love connection. Here are some movie couples we thought were perfect for each other in their roles. Share the film couples who left their impression on you, and link back here at The Bumbles.

The Way We Were. You can make as much or as little of this movie as you wish. It could be an example of "handsome is as handsome does," because the dishy leading man turns out to be a rather spineless scumbag. Or maybe the moral is "to thine own self be true," because fractious Katie turns out to be the happier person. But most of all it offers up terrific chemistry between two charismatic stars who have never been this romantic again.

An Officer and a Gentleman. Aw, come on! Who can watch the ending without melting a little bit, and inwardly shouting, "Way to go, Paula!" as she gets carried off into the sunset by her hero in white?

Four Weddings and a Funeral. This is the first time I saw Hugh Grant and couldn't wait for him to kiss Andie McDowell. Remember when he says, "In the words of David Cassidy, while he was still with the Partridge Family, 'I think I love you?'" I melted. Completely.

Holiday. I know that Hepburn and Tracy are considered one of the screen's great duos. But I like the Great Kate better with Cary Grant. And of their pairings, Holiday is my favorite. She falls desperately, truly in love with the most inconvenient man, and is willing to keep it a secret because it's the right and true and honest thing to do for all involved. And then, when she realizes that she can do the right thing AND have the great guy, she decides to go for it, and looks like a joyful, glorious force of nature when she challenges her family to, "Stop me! Oh please, someone try and stop me!"

And she's ... SAFE!

Don't know how close I came to being called out here at work, but at least I'm safe for now. (Enough baseball references? Well, it is Opening Day, after all!)

It's like a tomb here. I didn't realize how much sociability and atmosphere our secretaries lent, and now they are all gone.

Thanks to my blog buddies who sent good wishes my way. I appreciate the tender support. And once again to Snarkela, how do you always know?

I'm never prepared for the ending

I just watched PBS's The Diary of Anne Frank. This production includes the material poor Otto Frank omitted from the diary for decades -- passages that touch upon Anne's burgeoning sexuality, her unforgiving appraisal of her mother and her parents' marriage, etc. I read the unabridged diary a few years ago so I wasn't surprised. In fact, the bitchier and bossier Anne (as played by Ellie Kendrick) seemed, the more she made me smile for she truly was, in many ways, a young girl just like the rest of us, dealing with hormones and periods and the issues of independence and growing up that we all dealt with. Only poor Anne never came through on the other side, never had the opportunity to look back at her adolescence with wonder at her own behavior.

Mr. Dussel, the dentist, is more sympathetic in this version than I recall him in the past. I think it's because I'm intensely private -- never more than when I was 13, 14, 15 -- and the very presence of him in Anne's room made me dislike him. So I don't know if it's his portrayal that has changed, or my perspective.

But the thing that never changes is what a shock the ending is. Anne writes, "In spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart," and then the Nazis appear. The information flashed across the screen -- that Anne died in Bergen-Belsen the following March -- is just so freaking unfair! The hurt in my heart is that of the angry adolescent Gal who still simply cannot accept what happened to the young girl who poured her emotions into her diary … and whose words have been keeping us human for generations now.

So much fun to watch

I was sad to learn that Dixie Carter, aka Julia Sugarbaker, died yesterday at age 70. She was my favorite Designing Woman, a sassy belle who spoke her mind while maintaining her femininity.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: The Me Me Meme

1. Never in my life have I been: tall

2. The one person who can drive me nuts is: my least favorite, and now perhaps erstwhile, coworker

3. High school was: hell

4. When I’m nervous I: can't sit still

5. The last song I listened to was: "Falling Back in Love with You" by Marcia Ball. She has a bluesy voice and plays a mean honky-tonk piano.

6. If I were to get married right now my best man/maid of honor: would be shocked

7. My hair is: short and has a little red in it

8. When I was 5: it was curly and blonde

9. Last Christmas: wasn't so great

10. I should be..: enjoying Williamsburg

11. When I look down I see: my beautiful, shimmery coral pedicure

12. The happiest recent event was: my vacation

13. If I were a character on 'Friends' I would be: one of Phoebe's massage clients

14. By this time next year: I hope my life is more settled and peaceful

15. My current gripe is: my unsettled job situation

16. I have a hard time understanding: my kid sister

17. There’s this girl I know that: is an FCCLA Culinary Star (Let's hear it for my niece!)

18. If I won an award, the first person I would tell would be: my best friend, my oldest friend, or my mom

19. Take my advice: share your home with an animal you rescued from a shelter and revel in the love

20. The thing I want to buy: is love, but money can't buy me love (everybody tells me so)

21. If you visited the place I was born: you would be in a suburban hospital

22. I plan to visit: Colonial Williamsburg again

23. If you spent the night at my house: you would be appalled by all the paper I have laying around

24. I’d stop my wedding if: I found myself having one

25. The world could do without: birthers and other crazy right wing zealots

26. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: listen to birthers and other right wing zealots

27. Most recent thing I’ve bought myself: was a cup of soft serve chocolate yogurt with peanut butter & chocolate sprinkles

28. Most recent thing someone else bought me: a box of chocolates from my mom on Easter Sunday

29. My favorite blond is: Robert Redford

30. My favorite brunette is: Bruce Springsteen

31. My favorite red head is: me

32. My middle name is: Ann

33. In the morning I: shower and then feed the cats

34. The animals I would like to see flying besides birds are: humans like me. If I had wings myself, I wouldn't have to travel by plane.

35. Once, at a bar: I got free drinks because I was wearing a jaunty red Shriner's fez

36. Last night I was: freaking out about my job situation

37. There’s this guy I know who: whose voice I miss terribly

38. If I was an animal I’d be: a cat ... a flying cat, I guess

39. A better name for me would be: She Who Must Be Obeyed

40. Tomorrow I am: finding out my fate at work

41. Tonight I am: catching up on Desperate Housewives

42. My birthday is: a very holy day in Galtopia

Dumb Luck

Went to the dentist today and found that removing the crown, filling the cavity and putting in a new crown will cost more than originally estimated. I paid for much of the work today, some in advance, with my Discover Card because I neglected to cancel my Discover Payment Protection Plan after the initial free 30-day trial. If I do find I'm laid off on Monday, then I can put these payments on hold for up to 2 years. So sometimes my hideous laziness (you should see my living/dining room!) actually does work out in my favor.

It occurs to me that my resume and portfolio are not in the order I need them to be, but you know what? After spending hours in the dentist chair, I'm not doing anything about that today. I'm fingering the quill and inkwell charm I'm wearing around my neck, trying to maintain my vacation zen buzz as long as possible.

It happened Tuesday

The axe fell at the office. According to the industry blogs, 15 to 20 were let go. I contacted a coworker this evening and he reports that I'm safe, as far as he knows. But one of our art directors (arguably the most talented one) got it, as did another associate creative director, and three of our four admins.

I suppose it's possible that I'm on the list but they couldn't tell me because I was time traveling back to 18th century Williamsburg, where my profession didn't even exist yet. Or maybe I'm still on staff but we have been reorganized in such a way that it's impossible to work without completely sacrificing my integrity. Right now I don't know which one would be worse.

Tomorrow I'm getting my tooth fixed, which is an investment in me because the world can be cruel to a 50+ year old creative and I need to look as ... um ... "contemporary" as possible. And I'm picking up a purse I dropped off for repair -- maintaining my resolution to not buy any bags in 2010. So I guess I'm doing what I can.

But I'm scared and unsettled, and am trying so hard to regain my nice, chill vacation-induced temperament.

Hi, Len! Hi, Bob! I'm here!

I'm settling in to watch my first regular-season Cubs broadcast of 2010! I suspect my Boys in Blue haven't done all that great thus far (1-2) is because they knew I wasn't out here in TV Land. Well tonight, that changes, as will their luck.

I prefer listening to games on the radio because I adore Cub great Ron Santo, who does the color commentary. But this early in the season, when I'm just trying to learn about the new guys (Carlos Silva on the mound tonight), TV is better. And it's good to see Len Kasper and Bob Brenly again.

"16 years of marriage out the window"

Had one of those unfortunate boarding experiences last night where we were all sitting there for a while -- maybe 20 minutes -- waiting for a piece of equipment needed to move the plane away from the gate. I was sitting behind a very angry man who used the time on his cell phone. At first I thought he was an asshole. Then I wanted to give him a hug.

He was calling home and he got his son Cody, who was reluctant to put Mommy on the phone, which made him angrier and angrier. Cody was telling him story after story about the girls who live next door, and all he kept saying was, "I don't care Cody, I want to talk to Mommy." I thought, "Asswipe, Cody is just trying to tell you about his day."

Now I think Cody was trying to cushion the blow that Mommy didn't want to talk to Daddy. When she finally got on the phone, he started saying things like, "I AM talking to you, Kim!" and "If you want to hire him, hire him!" I thought they were arguing about some kind of contractor and then he said, "I am not taking responsibility for throwing 16 years of marriage out the window. I am not the bad guy." So it was a divorce lawyer.

Mind you, I had my headphones on for a lot of this. That's how loud he was talking. I can understand why Kim and Cody both felt intimidated by him.

When it was finally time to take off, and the flight attendant asked him twice to hang up, I thought he was going to jam the phone down her throat.

But still, I felt sorry for him. All the way between Atlanta and Chicago, all he did was look out the window. Nothing to drink. Never got up to go to the bathroom. Didn't pick up his inflight magazine. Just stared out the window. I could just feel his frustration eating him up alive.

I considered giving him a hug, but then I remembered the look he gave the flight attendant.

The Joys of Retail in Colonial Williamsburg

There are those who devote a day in Williamsburg to shopping in Merchant's Square, and I get it. I only spent a few hours there, but I can see how easy it would be to get lost there. In addition to souvenirs for family and friends and coworkers, I got myself some delightful goodies. Of course I bought myself a t-shirt and postcards and a magnet. I mean, it's not an official vacation if I don't return with a t-shirt, postcards and a magnet.

But I also got a necklace with a silver charm in the style of the day. Both men and women wore these, and they did double duty, acting as both decoration and "calling card," revealing what you do for a living. My new necklace sports a quill and an inkwell.

And I discovered a new shoe manufacturer, Think! Because of my history of heel spurs, I have to wear shoes with serious heel support. While I love my Birkenstocks for being so comfortable, they simply aren't pretty. But look at these new Think! sandals. I loooooove them. Made in Austria, they are as supportive and as substantial as Birkies, but so much cuter.

Ye Olde Williamsburg

When I wasn't being pampered, I was wandering around Colonial Williamsburg. I didn't get to much of it, because I was unprepared for how much of it there was to see! I spent about six hours taking in the historical sites, and here's what I was able to take in:

The Governor's Palace (shown). So beautiful! So opulent! Built for the governors appointed by the King to rule Virginia (which, in those days, even included Illinois). After the Revolution, Patrick Henry and Thomas Jefferson lived there as the first patriotic Virginia Governors.

The Peyton Randolph House (shown). The home of an aristocratic family (Jefferson was a Randolph cousin) that was a pillar of society both before and after the Revolution. Fascinating to tour to see not only how the family lived, but also their slaves. While the Randolphs considered themselves good owners because they saw to it their slaves learned to read, their slaves didn't agree. When a slave child born at the Randolph House came of age, Randolphs had no issue selling that child, thereby tearing apart families. So, when the Crown offered freedom to slaves to fight with the Brits to defeat the patriots, the Randolph slaves went for it. After the war, Mrs. Randolph's favorite, Eve, was returned to the House, like the piece of property that she was.

I also visited dressmaker's shop (even young children wore stays to help them maintain their perfect posture), the apothecary (the patient who is buying the potion is responsible for bringing the bottle, jar or cloth drawstring bag to carry it home), the brickyard (hot, back-breaking work), and the courthouse (the most frequent misdemeanor charged in those days was for missing church more than once a month).

At Chowning's Tavern, originally opened in 1766, I had a popular drink of the time, The Royal Apple (light rum, apple cider, lime juice and sugar). It cooled me off on these hot, hot days, just as touring these restored buildings satisfied by geeky old history-loving heart.

PS I am familiar with Lincoln-era Springfield and was surprised to see how little things changed between the mid-1700s and the mid-1800s. I mean, think about how very, very different your kitchen and your local post office are from those in 1910.

Ah ... spa ...

The Spa of Colonial Williamsburg is what drew me to this vacation destination in the first place. While not as luxurious or extensive as last year's spa, Chateau Elan, it's also not as expensive. My first day included a colonial sweet bath, where I soaked for half an hour, alone in a darkened room, in a tub filled with herbs, flowers and lemon. It smelled divine.

Then I had a facial and a 60-minute Swedish massage. Susan, the masseuse, was very good. She explained what she was doing, and checked to make sure I was comfortable and that she was using the right amount of pressure, but she wasn't as unremittingly blabby as the aesthetician who did my facial.

The second day highlighted my aching feet. Going suddenly from tennies and flats to sandals, and then doing a ton of walking in the 90º heat, left me weary. So the soak in the whirlpool, a really terrific hot stone massage (Susan again, who paid special attention to my aching arches), and a lovely pedi were just what the doctor ordered. No champagne was served with my pedi, as Chateau Elan always did, but the service was still very good. My spring/summer nail color is shimmery coral.

While it wasn't possible to stay in the same building as the spa, the way I did at Chateau Elan, it was just across the street and very convenient. The robes weren't as nice and snuggly, but the pool and fitness center equipment at this spa were as good or maybe even a nicer. There was something especially wonderful about celebrating a day of sight-seeing in the heat by swimming laps in a clean, cool pool -- with one lane wisely reserved for adult swim only.

So no, the Spa at Colonial Williamsburg isn't as deliciously indulgent as Chateau Elan. But it was also about $1000 cheaper, which meant I could enjoy the pampering without worrying about whether I could afford it. And for my 2010 vacation, that's very important.

Observations from the road

Since I just read an article on Sir Paul's message to the American Idol contestants, let me paraphrase the way I have always heard him open his shows -- "Hello, Blogosphere!"

I am in the Business Center at the Williamsburg Lodge. Having a wonderful time and don't wish to leave tomorrow. I really haven't given myself enough time. I thought cutting my days in half -- spa treatments in the AM, sight-seeing in the PM -- made sense, but that's only because I hadn't counted on how many sights there are to see, or how unaccustomed I am to energy-sapping 90 degree heat. If I can come back next year, I will add at least another half day for wandering about so I can enjoy both the historical experience and the spa zen buzz.

Had a lovely woman as my seatmate on the first leg of my journey (ORD to Atlanta). She was going to Augusta for the golf tournament -- her first solo vacation in 12 years. Her companion has Alzheimer's and, as she found out over a disasterous trip last Christmas, can no longer travel well. A formerly dynamic CEO, he is fading quickly and requires more and more care, and she realizes that as his primary caregiver she needs to be stronger than ever. That's why she's going to the Master's this year as planned; she believes a little time away from him will make her much stronger for all the time she has ahead with him.

Listening to her was balm for my heart, for she had many insights and much wisdom about the situation we find ourselves in with my uncle. I am terrified to fly, but having her in the seat next to me was a blessing in more ways than one.

Must go. Have to get ready for my pampering!

But better than last Easter

Easter 2009 was a very melancholy affair, because my mother was still very sick with pneumonia but resisted treatment. This year, I was grateful that she's OK. She's an old lady, which is hard for me to get used to, and has big gaps in her memory. But she's lucid and happy and breathing on her own. So yea!

Or perhaps I should say "yeah, yeah, yeah," for we spent a good deal of Easter evening at my sister's, playing Beatles Rock Band. It made me happy that we bonded over The Lads. I grew to not suck as a drummer, and my nephew -- never as well behaved at home as he is when we're alone together -- showed off his impressive and enthusiastic vocal stylings ... until he got bored and began throwing a stuffed penguin around. My niece alternately sang, played the guitar, and accepted our praise for her talents as the evening's chef. My brother-in-law was more talkative than usual, and we each shared concerns for our job security.

My sister remains a competitive bitch. I don't know why, and I don't exactly care anymore. But she alone of her little family made me feel unwelcome, even though I was invited.

The important thing is that we were all together, and healthier than we were last Easter. For that I am grateful.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: The 35 Questions X 2 Meme: Part Two

36. If you suddenly became single or are single, do you think you could last in a relationship for 12 months or more? I have in the past and have no reason to suspect I couldn't again.

37. Do you forgive or forget? I have done both in the past and have no reason to suspect I couldn't again.

38. Do you trust people? I have in the past and have no reason to suspect I couldn't again.

39. What are you not looking forward to? My trip to Colonial Williamsburg and the beginning of the baseball season, both of which happen to occur on Monday. YEA!

40. Do you get mad easily? I have in the past and have no reason to suspect I couldn't again.

41. Tell us about the last time you were told you that you have pretty eyes. Not meaning to even remotely imply that I'm a babe, but I get that a lot. Most recently from a bank teller.

42. Do you have strange dreams? Yeah. Like the one where I'm testifying in court, and Burt Reynolds, wearing a white suit, comes in and tries to intimidate me by glaring. While awake, I seldom testify in court and somehow never think about Burt Reynolds.

43. Ever licked someone's cheek or forehead? No.

44. Tell us about the last time you fell asleep in someones arms. Can't recall the last time, but, since I recently ran into Bathtub Boyfriend, an interlude with him springs to mind. One Saturday night, his very favorite old movie, Dark Passage, was on the local PBS station and he really wanted me to see it. So he made dinner -- a glorified macaroni and cheese dish of his own design -- and then we settled into his futon in front of the TV. And between the heavy dinner and the warm glow from the black and white TV picture, I dozed off in his arms.

45. When did you last play a game? Last weekend I played Petcha Didn't Know with my nephew.

46. What do you have on you at all times? There's nothing I always have on me, but there's a ring I wear every day.

47. Do you go out in public without getting all dressed up? Yes.

48. Do you like fruity or minty gum? Specifically cinnaminty.

49. Favourite musician or group? Sir Paul

50. Do you like anyone? I like many people

51. Favourite computer game? Currently I enjoy Pogo Boggle

52. First album you ever went and bought with your own money? I believe it was the Mary Poppins soundtrack

53. Think back five months ago, were you single? Ooooh, way back five months ago? I can't recall.

54. Do you believe in celebrating anniversaries? Not really

55. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? I hope so

56. Last thing you bought? Disposable razors at CVS

57. Are you a jealous person? I have been in the past and have no reason to suspect I won't again.

58. Does it take a lot to make you cry? Yes

59. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to? Yes

60. Have you ever had your heart-broken? I have done in the past and have no reason to suspect I won't again.

61. Have you ever done something while drunk that you still cannot believe you did? Oh dear Lord yes. The less said about this, the better.

62. Is there anyone you secretly wish you could be spending your time with right now? Yes

63. Do you text? Yes

64. Do you wish someone would call or text you right now? One special someone, yes

65. Is your life anything like it was a year ago? In many ways, yes
66. Go back one year on your blog. Leave us a link to your favorite post. A review of last year's spa vacation

67. You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life, what is it? Classic Coke

68. Tell us about someone that you have lost contact with someone you wish you didn't. I have a friend who is like a kid brother to me. He married and moved out to the burbs and is happy, and I'm happy for him, but I'm sad we have drifted apart.

69. What is the last thing you said out loud? "Joey is awesome."

70. Will this year be better than last? So far 2010 has sucked. But it still has time to turn it around. C'mon, 2010!

The little girl who had a little curl right in the middle of her forehead

Went to a baby shower today. I don't generally enjoy these affairs, and this one was no different, except that it seemed to mean a lot to the expectant mom -- a coworker -- that I showed up. Since I'm on vacation, this might be the last time I see her before her wee one arrives.

My favorite companion was a lovely toddler girl, all in green and pink, waddling around barefoot and telling everyone "hi." We bonded over a piece of ribbon that had fallen off a package. To be completely honest, I played with her as though she was the kitten she reminded me off, holding the ribbon just a bit out of her reach and encouraging her to "get it, c'mon, get it!" She'd reach up and grab it and laugh. She was a terrific sport. She looked over to me for approval every time she did something adventurous, like laying on the floor and covering herself with her jacket as if it were a blanket. I was completely besotted with her.

There was another little girl at the party, about the same age but nowhere near as charming. Pretty, with a mass of dark curls, and a very bad temper. Her mom and grandma tried to get her to eat fruit and oh, my, she was having none of it. I've never seen such a violent reaction to strawberries! I think I will hear her howls in my sleep.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Hurts So Good

1. Tell us about the last time you really got hurt. I am now very upset because of my uncle. His mental decline has been swift, and I am struggling to accept the loss of the man he was.

2. What's your oldest possession? My Lassie dog. That worn old plush toy must be more than 45 years old.

3. Do you have any phobias? Air travel. Squirrels. Clowns.

4. What values did your parents instill in you? From my father I got a love of history and a respect for what came before. I got my mother's affection and respect for animals.

5. What are your plans for Easter? My niece is cooking ham and quiche, and I am eating it.

6. I like sun more than snow. I don't understand what's meant by this statement. I've enjoyed many bright, sunny, snow-covered days.

7. Tell us about 3 fads from your teenage years. Platforms shoes, even sneakers. Corny variety shows (everyone from Glenn Campbell to Donny & Marie to Tony Orlando & Dawn). Farrah hair.

8. Tell us what is the most important attribute in a lover. Sensitivity.

9. What new piece of technology have you resisted buying and what would it take for you to change your mind? DVR. I just don't feel like paying even more for cable every month.

Let's not forget Easter

As the time ticks away to two highly anticipated events in my life -- Cubs baseball and my vacation -- I don't want to forget Easter. In honor of this coming Sunday, when we remember that God gave his only son so our spirits live forever, I rejoiced by giving the homeless gentleman in front of McDonald's a bottle of milk as well as change for his cup.

I don't know if he realizes that today is Good Friday, or that Sunday is Easter, so I didn't mention the holiday. But it made him happy, and I am certain that remembering him is a good way to remember Him.

Climate change

My boss is talking to me again, as if last week hadn't happened. It's the usual -- updates on client meetings, tales about his college-age son. I don't know what was up with him but to tell you the truth, I don't really care.

ONE MORE WORKDAY TILL MY VACATION!!!!!

Still, it's more pleasant to be here when the atmosphere is a little warmer.

The fine art of awfulizing

So here's what I do: I take a situation I'm afraid of and imagine in the bleakest terms possible. I examine from every which dark way and, more often than not, come to the conclusion that, "yes, I can handle that." I may not LIKE it, I most certainly don't WANT to do it that way, but yes, it's most definitely within the realm of the acceptable. It may sound negative to you, but awfulizing generally gives me the courage to soldier on.

Which is what I did today. I checked out the maximum amount I can receive from IDES (Illinois Department of Employment Security), with taxes deducted. Even if I am completely unable to supplement my unemployment benefits with freelance work, I will have enough to pay my mortgage and assessments for six months.

These benefits are in addition to any severance I may receive (yeah, right) and the emergency fund I have stashed away.

Living on such a budget would not make me happy, mind you. But it makes me happier than living in a Kenmore refrigerator box on Lower Wacker Drive. So now, if you'll excuse me, I'm about to soldier on. After all, I do still have this job!

The story of my life

I'm only kidding a little bit here. Karen Silkwood is a martyr to whistle-blowing, and I feel a certain kinship to her. Of course my life is far less dramatic and there are far fewer consequences. While she narc-ed about dangerous conditions at the nuclear power plant where she worked and may well have been murdered for her pains, I threw a spotlight on how dysfunctional this creative department is and, for my pains, have been ignored by my boss.

Completely. He has not said a single word to me this week. Though, in fairness, he did wave on Monday.

I don't know if he's mad because my coworkers came to my defense last Friday when I wasn't in, or if he's upset because he has something of a crush on my most difficult coworker and he had to have an uncomfortable conversation with her, or because he's emotionally checked out of here and just hopes if he avoids me, we'll never have to discuss this again.

Or maybe it means I'm being let go soon.

I just have to hang on with all ten fingertips until Friday at 5:30. Then I'm on vacation. A spa getaway is definitely in order.

And soon baseball starts. Cubs baseball makes everything look better.

Stolen from today's Tribune

Greg Kot of the Chicago Tribune referred to Tim Urban as, "The second coming of Bobby Sherman." Watching American Idol tonight, and having once been a 12 year old girl myself, I get it, and predict Tim will be on for weeks to come. Tonight, as he stared into the camera and crooned, I wished he would just blink. But I know that if I was watching as a lovestruck junior high school girl, tonight I'd pretend my pillow was Tim. Simon is right -- no matter how bad the judges (and I) think he is musically, it doesn't matter because he's got "the look."

The Queen's Meme

The best way to stay out of the Dungeon is to play along by clicking here.

What NOT To Do when you’re…..
1. On a first date. Sleep with him.

2. Intoxicated. Call your ex and tell him you forgive him because he's the one great love of your life. Trust me on this.

3. In the shower. Dance

4. At your ex’s wedding. Attend

5. In jail. Amuse the authorities with your snappy answers to stupid questions.

6. Being stalked. Be embarrassed and keep it to yourself. Share with everyone you know! The more people you have watching out for you, the better.

7. Stuck to an igloo. Lick the wall.

8. In sewing class Lick the bobbin.

9. Asleep in a helium balloon Trust the Wizard to steer.

10. At a birthday party for twins Show up with one gift

11. On a nude beach Show up without sunscreen

12. At the opera Show up at all. ICK!

13. you’re falling in love Think that he'd be perfect "if only." No one is perfect, and it's not fair to expect anyone to change.

14. Low on gasoline in a bad part of town Forget your cell phone

15. Having a baby Smoke

16. On fire Forget the lyrics to the old Scout song, "Clothes on fire? Here's your goal. First stop, then drop and roll."

17. Lost at the mall Neglect to consider it an adventure

18. At a single’s dance Act married. (Unless you are married, you Jesse James/Tiger Woods scumbag, you!)

19. Riding a bike on the Jersey Turnpike Forget the lyrics to the Scout song, "When riding a bike, please be smart. Safety first right from the start. Wear a helmet on your head. Make sure it fits, that's what I said."

20. Driving your significant other's car Forget to put the seat, mirrors and radio back the way he likes them.

21. Being robbed at gunpoint Amuse the robbers with your snappy answers to stupid questions.

22. Kissing Slobber. If I wanted to kiss a St. Bernard, I would.

23. Paying the hotel cashier Sign for it without at least trying to talk them out of the pay-per-view movie.

24. Buying lingerie Wear it without washing it thoroughly first. Really. I know it's gross, but it's not uncommon for department stores to put unclean, returned lingerie right back on the sales floor.

24. Commenting on a blog Say silly things you think are provocative. Like, "who cares about this?" Um ... I do, or I wouldn't post about it, you idiot.

25. In Queen Mimi's dungeon Forget to bribe Homer. He's the Power Behind the Throne, you know

One week from tonight

As I look around this condo, which looks as though I'm just waiting for the A&E Hoarders crew to knock at the door, I am even more enthusiastic about where I'll be sleeping one week from tonight. So spartan, so clutter free ...

Not a BAD Monday. Just a weird Monday.

First, my most-difficult coworker came by my office and acted like nothing had ever happened.

Secondly, my boss passed my office twice today, waved once, and that was it.

Two of my coworkers came by and told me how much they support me, which was really nice. They also mentioned that my boss sat down with each of them on Friday and asked them what they thought of the situation and suggested ways that he might rectify it. Which makes my boss never mentioning it to me even weirder.

Had lunch with a former coworker and am delighted by how happy she is. Her 9-month-old baby is a delight, cute as can be and soooo close to talking. Her husband is having a hard time sticking to the "we're not a couple anymore, we're now a family of three" budget but where he went way over was in how much he spent on Valentine's Day. How romantic is that? And she began a new job recently, and her new boss is very generous in allowing her flex time. Since she's such a great girl, finding her this happy makes me happy.

And Steve, the dispatcher who took my reservations for rides to and from Newport News airport when I'm on vacation next week, flirted with me. Thank you, Steve.

Movie Monday -- Sidekicks

Share those buddy films that came to your mind, linking back here at The Bumbles.

Thelma and Louise. A great chick flick, a great road trip flick, a great "sidekick" flick. I guess this makes it a great flick, huh?

The Untouchables. Elliott Ness was lucky to have a sidekick like Malone, the seasoned Irish cop who knew "the Chicago way."

The Sting. Top of mind because I just saw it Friday afternoon. I also picked it because whereas Butch & the Kid were equals, there was more of a pupil/teacher relationship in this movie, with Redford as the sidekick. I suppose you could argue that he was too old to play Johnny Hooker, but then, why argue with any opportunity to see the two coolest guys in the universe on screen together?

We're a team

My nephew, age 10, enjoys creating artwork. His penmanship is ... well, shoddy. He admits it and is frustrated that adults keep harping on it when all he has to do to get around it is use the keyboard. I'm neither his teacher nor his mother so I'm not prepared to address that. After all, I'm the aunt and we're supposed to have fun together.

I, on the other hand, have never been able to draw for shit.

So when we got together today to create "paper Easter eggs" for my uncle, we teamed up and we split the task -- he was the pictures and I was the words.

First he drew eggs -- three or four per page. Then we talked about our uncle. Since both my nephew and my uncle enjoy looking at coins, examining them for details, he decorated one page of eggs in gold and silver and then I lettered, "Coins are cool." Some eggs were colored to match the fur of his cat, and of my uncle's cat. Both my nephew and my uncle like turtles so there was a turtle egg. You get the idea.

The envelope containing our paper Easter eggs is sealed and I'll drop it in the mailbox tomorrow. So while we won't be with my uncle this Sunday, he'll know he's been in our thoughts.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: The 35 Questions X 2 Meme: Part One

1. How far away is the last person you kissed? I don't know where he is these days.

2. Has someone ever told you they would be with you forever? Not in those exact words, but I have discussed marriage a time or two.

3. Last person you were in a car with? My extremely difficult coworker. She was actually OK that day. Guess her meds were calibrated correctly.

4. Any plans for tomorrow? I'm going to the office and starting the workweek.

5. How long does it take for you to take a shower? Ten minutes to half an hour. Depends on my mood.

6. Best friend or close friends? Many of my friends have made guest appearances on this blog. My Best Friend (see yesterday's), My Oldest Friend, John, Kathy (see yesterday's post), Kathleen, Barb …

7. Is tomorrow going to be a good day? Hope it will, won't be surprised if it's not, though.

8. Did you kiss anyone Friday? No

9. Ever thrown up in public? Yes. I can think of four different incidents over the last 30 years. I had food poisoning for one. I have no additional comment on the other three.

10. What's on your mind RIGHT NOW? Does Sarah Palin like the Tea Party Movement because she's the youngest and prettiest at their rallies? (I'm watching the Today Show.)

11. Who was the last person you talked to? My mom.

12. What is the WORST subject they teach at school? It's been so long since I've been in school, I have no comment.

13. Have you seen anyone lately that you don't get along with? Not since Thursday. I have to hope this situation will have cooled off and improved before I show up for work tomorrow.

14. What is your favourite colour top to wear? Blue

15. Have you ever been in a car accident? Nothing serious.

16. What's the closest thing to you that's green? The sofa under my ass.

17. Where would you like to be right now? The spa at Colonial Williamsburg

18. Write down some lyrics to the song you're listening to? I don't understand why do I stress a man, when there are so many better things at hand ...

19. How many dogs do you have? None

20. Is anything bugging you right now? I do have cats, and one of them is bugging me. He feels his breakfast is more important than this meme.

21. Is life going right for you now? Fuck, no! My uncle is deteriorating, my job is in peril, which is making my coworkers crazy. But it's spring, the time of Resurrection, and baseball, and my vacation. So I just have to hang on and get through the week.

22. Is there someone you care about more than yourself? There is someone I put first.

23. What made you laugh today? No one yet, but the day is young!

24. What was the last movie you watched? The Hurt Locker

25. Whats the last conversation you had about? My niece and nephew

26. What were you doing at 7:00 this morning? Starting this meme

27. Do you like your hair long or short? Short

28. Do you want to see somebody right now? Yes.

29. Do you like the rain? Sometimes.

30. Did you have a valentine this year? Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

31. The last person you kissed needs you at 3 am, would you go? No

32. Would you honestly say you'd risk your life for someone else? No

33. Honestly, if you could go back 1 month and change something would you? I would be more serious about working out.

34. How do you feel about boys smoking? No one should smoke at all, but especially not anywhere near me.

35. Could you see yourself with someone forever? I wish I did.

Heavenly advice

Today's horoscope is relevant to my life right now. It's difficult today to hold on to your recent optimism, but this need not be a source of concern. It's healthy to consider more realistic scenarios and integrate them into your plans to increase your chances for success. But don't be self-indulgent and allow your current worries to grow into self-doubt. It's crucial to maintain your critical thinking, even while dreaming of all the future possibilities just around the corner. Tarot.com

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: You're My Best Friend

1. Outside of your romantic life, do you currently have a best friend? Yes. He's the one I refer to often on this blog as, creatively enough, "my best friend." He likes all those intense, geeky aspects of my personality that make everyone else cringe. He's having his own issues these days. This song could be him ... and now he's in his mid-4os.

2. Regarding your future, what is the best thing you could hope for? To remain healthy enough to be independent until my last day. My grandma died at 88, in her own home and in her own bed, after dozing off with a library book (Louis L'Amour) open on her chest and her glasses on her nose. I'd like that to be my future. (Though I'd prefer a mystery to a western.)

3. Have you ever helped out a friend with basic needs, like rent or food? If yes. what did you do? I discovered my friend Kathy was so broke that she took a second job delivering pizzas at night, which I didn't think was safe. So I gave her $500 to tide her over. Of course, Kathy being Kathy, she took an extra shift behind the wheel to pay me back faster!

4. If they re-instituted the draft (for both genders and you were of age) would you go, or would find some way out of it? I'd like to think I'd go because I truly admire soldiers, cops and firefighters. I don't know that I would, though.

5. Tell us one thing you wish you hadn't let yourself do. One thing? ONE THING? God, it seems like there's one thing every day! Like yesterday, I let myself skip my workout and I wish I hadn't.

6. Tell us about the last time you bragged. When I told my mom how I spoke my mind at work on Thursday. I was quite proud of myself.

7. What area are you wisest in? Other people's lives. I'm a savant, able to solve everyone's problems but my own.

8. Tell us about something that happened that at the time made you "full of yourself." There are times when I'm presenting to the client, I can feel they're with me. And I think to myself, "Gawd, Gal, you ARE good at this!"

9. Has there ever been a time that you wanted to try something in the bedroom, but were afraid to ask? Yes.

Sorry, but I can't

I tried to watch the PBS/Chicago Tonight interview with Karl Rove, I really did. After all, in this fractious political atmosphere I should try to learn from others who feel differently than I do. Sincere, serious, patriotic dyed-in-the-wool conservatives may not be able to change my mind, but it may be valuable to learn why they feel the way do. And Chicago Tonight is a good, reasonable and fair platform.

But listening to Rove try to square the circle between his likely/possibly gay father's lifestyle and his own exploitation and politicization of gay marriage made me want to puke. It sounds just as insincere and cynical coming from his own lips as it did when I considered his motives from a distance.

So I turned it off a few minutes in.