Happy Birthday to me -- Pt. 3

Saturday my friend John gave me a terrific birthday present -- it was so good it was, as Neely O'Hara herself would say, "a double-triple." He took me to a special screening of Valley of the Dolls at a grand old movie palace. Built in 1929, the Music Box has only one screen, an elegant red curtain, an old-fashioned organ, and it seats only about 500.

Saturday it was packed with my people. People who love Valley of the Dolls. Fans who, like me, can recite the dialog:

"Sparkle, Neely, sparkle!"

"It's a rotten business."
"I know, but I love it."

"Oh, the hell with 'em. Let 'em droop!"

"Now get outta my way. I got a MAN waiting for me."*

"Boobies! Who needs 'em?"

"Art films? NUDIES! That's all they are!"

"All cats are gray at night."

"I'm gonna heat up the lasagna."

The men sitting in front of John and me brought pill bottles filled with "dolls" … OK, they were really M&Ms. As a sign of unity for those of us who love this cinematic classic, they turned and rewarded me for knowing the film so well by sharing their "dolls." But not all of them. They needed to save enough to shake and rattle the pill bottle every time Anne, Jennifer or especially our beloved Neely popped a pill (or two, or handful.)

As if seeing this camp classic in a theater among my own for the fist time wasn't delightful enough, after the movie, Neely HERSELF came out on stage. Yes, Miss Patty Duke was there, live and in person.

What's more, she's Cathy who's lived most everywhere, from Zanzibar to Berkeley Square, as well as Patty, who's only seen the sites a girl can see from Brooklyn Heights. And, of course, Helen Keller.

It was a real-live icon, right in front of me. A small, slender woman who looks every one of her 65 years, but still has a great figure and a terrific sense of humor and warmth. She freely admitted that she used to abhor Valley of the Dolls but now she loves it. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say she loves how much we love it. She told stories about Sharon Tate and Judy Garland, about Anne Bancroft and Gregory Peck and the night she won her Oscar for The Miracle Worker. She even sang a duet of "Come Live with Me," aping this most tasteless scene from the Valley of the Dolls.




On the way out of the theater, our eyes met and she said "hi." I was thuh-rilled! I can't imagine a better present. Then he and I went out for tapas and sangria. I had a lovely time.

I always do with John. As with my best friend, I can be myself -- my goofiest self -- with him. Sometimes I think that's been John's greatest gift to me, the way he simply takes me as I am.


*I included that one for you, Snarkela.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 20 :: Your views on drugs and alcohol Everything in moderation.

Day 21 :: (scenario) You’ve gotten into a fight with your best friend and an hour later, he’s in a car accident. What do you do? The very thought of this creeps me out. I worry about my best friend so much, especially that he might be injured or ill and no one will think to contact me. Since he lives in another city, I would figure out how to get word to him that he is my thoughts and prayers. I would talk to his family or, if he's in the hospital, the nurse on his floor. I would help in any way I could. Any battles we'd had would be irrelevant.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: Questions a la Randomness, A Meme

Cheers to all of us thieves!

What was the last thing you put in your mouth? A water bottle. This answer does not make me happy for a variety of reasons.

How late did you stay up last night and why? Just before midnight. I would have stayed up later, but I was full off booze and dope, as Helen Lawson would say. Actually it was sangria and M&M's, as my friend John took me to a special screening of Valley of the Dolls. I am going to devote a post to this fantabulous experience later.




If you could move somewhere else, would you? No. I love Chicago. Last night the Christmas lights went on, and it's so gorgeous!

Have you ever been kissed under fireworks? No. And come to think of it, that makes me sad.

Do you believe ex’s can be friends? It does seem difficult. I don't know why having loved someone once precludes ever liking them again, but somehow it does. I do have one former boyfriend who keeps me involved in his life, albeit from a distance, and it means a great deal to me.

When was the last time you cried really hard? I don't remember. I'm not much of a crier.

What items could you not go without during the day? My laptop, my iPod, and my sunglasses.

Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? I don't recall.

How do you feel about your life right now? I'm kind of emotional about everything right now. I'm touched by how people are fussing over me, but now I'm bummed that I've never been kissed under fireworks.

If we were to look in your facebook inbox, what would we find? A couple of friend requests.

Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass? Yes, because they weren't really pills I took last night, just M&Ms.

Has anyone ever called you perfect before? No.

Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m.: who do you want it to be? My best friend.

Do you think too much or too little? Too much, but perhaps about the wrong things.

Do you believe in fairy tales? Nah.

Have you ever licked the back of a CD to try to get it to work? Really? People do this? Is it ever successful?

What’s the largest age difference between yourself and someone you’ve dated? Twelve years.

Have you ever been on a blind date? Yes.

Do you have any friends that you’ve known for 10 years or more? God, yes! Most of them, in fact.

Have you ever had a crush on a teacher? Yes.

What song do you want played at your funeral? Let It Be.

Would you tell your parents if you were gay? Dunno. I mean, I never told them when I started having heterosexual sex.

What would your last meal be before getting executed? Steak and eggs. Chocolate mousse for dessert. Something that would send me into a food coma.

Do you walk around the house naked? Yes.

What do you do as soon as you walk in the house? Do a headcount of the cats.

Who is the person you can count on the most? Depends on the situation. I look to different people for different advice/solace.

What is your favorite Holiday? Memorial Day or the 4th of July. I like the long weekends.

Would you ever get plastic surgery? No. Maybe. Depends.

Have you ever caught a fish? Yes. A small one. I let it go.

What is the first thing you notice about people? With men, it's hair. With women, it's their handbags.

What is the farthest you’ve been from home? Paris

How did you meet your spouse or significant other (or most recent one)? Work

Where was the last place you drove (other than home/school/work)? I don't recall. I haven't been behind the wheel since the Reagan administration.

Happy Birthday to me -- Part 2

I had an emotional birthday celebration on Friday. My aunt/Godmother -- my dad's kid sister -- was in town because one of my cousins is performing in the pit for Chicago production of The Lion King. We all got together for dinner to celebrate my birthday.

This was very important to me because this is the first year that I haven't, and won't, hear from my uncle/Godfather -- my mom's kid brother. God knows the man has a lot of faults and has done a lot of people bad over his lifetime, but he's always been good to me. I even recall getting birthday wishes from him when he was a soldier in Vietnam. But he's very ill and, for all intents and purposes, is lost to me. So having my aunt/Godmother reenter my life just as he exits feels very important to me. Perhaps I'm just trying to impose order and purpose where there is none, but I want to believe this timing is significant.

In addition to the gettogether, my aunt gave me a ring that had been my grandmother's and my cousin gave me Grandma's Ryne Sandberg jersey! My grandmother loved her Ryno more than any other Cub ever, and I think of her every time I see his #23 pennant flying over Wrigley Field. My cousin gave her this jersey to wear to their annual Mother's Day date at Wrigley Field, and he said I should have it since I have taken her place as the family's "insane Cub fan." So it was like having my Grandma there with us, too.

It was lovely of my aunt to do this. I haven't seen her or my cousin since my Grandma's funeral back in 1997. There was quite a to-do over Grandma's will, with my older sister trying to get as much for herself and me and my kid sister as possible. It was an ugly matter and I dealt with it by not dealing with it, by withdrawing completely. I didn't want my Grandma's money, I wanted my Grandma. So I am grateful that my aunt and cousin don't bear me any ill will as a result of all that.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 19 :: What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics? A quick and easy answer to a complex question -- Nothing is more important, or as personal, as faith; while not quite as important as religion, little has a greater impact on our neighbors than our politics.

Liberated from Kwizgiver

You can see her answers here.

10 years ago … I was a little in love with a guy whose voice sounded just like Robert Downey, Jr.'s

5 years ago … I was really happy at work

1 year ago … My nephew was planning my family birthday party

Yesterday … was busy at work, which is a good feeling

Today … I was a lazy slug

Tomorrow … I may be reuniting with my aunt/Godmother, if plans go well

5 snacks I enjoy … Apples, American cheese, Original Fritos corn chips, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, Raisinettes (at the movies)

5 bands I know most of the lyrics of their songs … The Beatles, Electric Light Orchestra, The Eagles, The Supremes, The Doobie Brothers

5 things I would do with $100 million … quit my job, take care of my family, travel, start a charitable foundation, enjoy (These are Kwiz' answers, but they're perfect)

5 bad habits I have … cluttering, farting around on the internet when I should be doing something productive, not drinking enough water, spending too much time in the tub, wasting electricity

5 locations I would run away to … Washington DC, NYC, Boston, Atlanta, Toronto

5 things I would never wear … fur, short shorts, spaghetti straps, bikini, or latex (Again, these are Kwiz' answers, but they're perfect)

5 things I like doing … emailing friends, watching movies, reading, playing with the cats, playing Canasta on Pogo

5 biggest joys of the moment … my cat Reynaldo being sweet with the little neighbor girl, having our laundry room in working order again, feeling a bit more comfortable about my job security, my PEOPLE magazine arrived, my ongoing birthday celebration

5 famous people I would like to meet … Tom Ricketts (owner of the Cubs), Bill Clinton, Elizabeth Edwards, Jennifer Aniston, Mark Harmon

5 movies I like … The Way We Were, Valley of the Dolls, Mary Poppins, Holiday,
Bonnie & Clyde

5 TV shows I like … NCIS, American Idol, Morning Joe, The Daily Show, The Colbert Report

5 favorite toys … Pandora.com, Pogo, this here laptop, my iPod, Airwick Freshmatic

This is the cutest thing you will EVER see

30 Days of Honesty

Day 17 :: A book you’ve read that changed your views on something Saving Graces by Elizabeth Edwards. Before I read this book, I thought that I was helping my friends by being self-sufficient. I never understood that it balances the scales of a relationship to ask for help every now and again. This book is unsparing, even scorching in its honesty. There were times as I read how she dealt with the death of her son that I had to put the book down. I was embarrassed for her when she admitted she went to the cemetery and read Wade his lessons so he could keep up with his classmates. I cringed when I read how she questioned, fought with and finally came to a new acceptance and understanding of God and faith. But by the time I was done with the book, and her journey, I understood the courage it took for her to share that horrible vulnerability, and how doing so helped others cope with heart ache and loss. I know her personal life has become controversial, painful and untidy. But to me, she remains a great lady. She wrote in her next book that she finds the lyrics to Leonard Cohen's Anthem inspiring, and I remember them whenever I think of her: "Ring the bells that still can ring/forget your perfect offering/there's a crack in everything/the light behind to see."

Day 18 :: Your views on gay marriage According to the Bill of Rights, each state has to provide equal protection under the law to everyone. So to me this is like interracial marriage -- controversial now, but in 40 years, schoolchildren will wonder what the fuss was about.

Wasted Day?

It's after noon on my day off and I'm still not dressed.

"See 'ya, Katie." "See 'ya, Hubbell."

The Way We Were is my favorite movie of all time. I don't know how many times I've seen over the past 37 years .... dozens, probably. I have mentioned it in this blog 18 times. There are times I have felt like Katie -- at once too much (too noisy, too political, too inflexible) and at the same time somehow not quite enough (not girly enough, not pretty enough, not easy enough). And, like Katie, I've always loved Hubbell. And, like Katie, somehow my destiny has been to not quite be happy in love when the lights come up.

Today, Streisand and Redford reunited on Oprah. I'm watching the rebroadcast right now.

It feels so important -- like I'm watching an important touchstone of my personal life come to life. Such is the power of movies.

Such is the power of Katie and Hubbell.

10 on Tuesday -- I like vodka

Any of these cocktails would hit the spot right now.

1) Cosmo -- vodka, cointreau and cranberry juice

2) Seabreeze -- vodka, cranberry juice, grapefruit juice

3) Apple Martini -- vodka and green apple schnapps

4) Flirtini -- vodka, cointreau and pineapple juice

5) Pomegranate Martini -- vodka, cointreau, pomegranate juice

6) Chocolate Martini -- vodka, white creme de cacao, and a Hershey's kiss

7) Fuzzy Navel -- vodka, peach schnapps and orange juice

8) Lychee Martini -- vodka, peach schnapps, cranberry juice, lychee juice

9) Campari Cocktail* -- vodka and Campari

10) Red Snapper* -- vodka, amaretto, and cranberry juice

* I've never had either of these, but am willing to try them

30 Days of Honesty

Day 15 :: Something or someone you can’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it Caffeine! I need my red cans of Coke every day. If I didn't have any in my refrigerator, I promise you there ain't no mountain high enough, ain't no valley low enough, ain't no river wide enough to keep me from replenishing my stock. Come to think of it, I wonder if I should live without it. After all, headache medicine routinely includes caffeine.

Day 16 :: Someone or something you can definitely live without Madonna. Or Kathie Lee Gifford. About the only two things these two women have in common is how much I cannot stand them.

I love this kid

I'm watching Abigail Breslin in The Ultimate Gift. It's pretty predictable holiday fare, but she's delightful. Again. I love this kid. I'm a total Abigail-head.

Movie Monday -- The Afterlife

Share your favorite movies about heaven, hell, resurrection, angels, demons or haunts, linking back here at The Bumbles.

On Halloween I saw Hereafter, the wonderful Clint Eastwood movie about the afterlife that's in theaters now. Since I just blogged about that one, I decided to muse about these two of an earlier vintage.

Heaven Can Wait. One minute, NFL QB Joe Pendelton is peddling his bike down a California highway, the next moment he's in a "waystation" between this world and the next. His guardian angel plucked him away from the scene just before the moment of impact, hoping to spare Joe a gruesome death. But his timing was off -- because of his superior reflexes, it was Joe's destiny to avoid the accident, and he would still be alive if the angel hadn't intervened. So now what? One of Heaven's higher-ranking "escorts," Mr. Jordan, tries to find another body for Joe to live in until his pre-destined moment, years in the future. At first Joe rejects the body, and the new life, he's given to inhabit. But then he meets Betty and falls in love ... Warren Beatty and Julie Christie are Joe and Betty, and they are so dear and sweet and romantic. While I'm not sure I believe that destiny has but one perfect person for us to love, this movie makes a most convincing argument.

Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol. Dickens gave us the Marley and the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future, and Mr. Magoo gave me my first and still most favorite Scrooge.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 14 :: A hero that has let you down (write a letter)

Dear Mr. President:

Every time I think of you, that old Laura Nyro song starts playing in my head. You know the one, "BILL! I love you so, I always will ..."

And I did and I do. But you broke my heart.

It wasn't the infidelity that bothered me. Hell, I'm a Kennedy girl. I grew up believing we can and should separate personal behavior from public performance.

It was the way you allowed your good ol' boy horndog behavior to seep from the personal to the public that makes me nuts. You did a young and emotionally vulnerable girl in the Oval Office! How did you think you were going to get away with that? And I don't for a moment think you cared for that poor kid. You saw more interesting, more attractive women every day on the rope line in front of the White House (remember, this was before 9/11 when we could tour 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue). You chose her simply because she was there, and you did her simply because you could. And then you not only lied about it, you demeaned her ("I never had sexual relations with that woman ..."). The imbalance of power between you two and your fates appalls me. YOU were the most powerful man in the free world, YOU were the one with a wife and daughter (a daughter not that much older than your mistress). Yet today you remain one of the most popular men on the planet, and she's a punchline, a synonym for oral sex. How is that fair?

You're a good man and you have done a lot of good. But you had the capacity to do more and be a great man. I believed in you, and you let me down. You let the nation down. And you let yourself down. Every account of your presidency will include the phrase, "impeached by the House of Representatives."

And yet ... and yet ... When you talk about the Clinton Global Initiative, I'm transfixed. When I watched you walk Chelsea down the aisle, I got misty. Every time you have a health problem, I say a little prayer.

So even though you broke my heart, I love you so, and I always will.

Happy Birthday to me, Part One

My friend Kathy contacted me via Facebook Saturday night and wondered if we could meet for breakfast this morning. She remembered my birthday! This is very important to me, because Kathy has had plenty of career, health and money problems over the last three years or so. And yet, my birthday never slips her notice, and for that I am grateful.

She's either 62 or 63 now, and is learning graphic design because she has her sights set on a new career and dreams of being able to afford her own home. (Because of financial setbacks, she is living with her daughter, son-in-law and stepchildren.) At times Kathy exasperates me, but I admire faith in herself and hopes for the future.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: Another 14 Question Meme

Cheers to all of us thieves!

1. Lots of pillows or just one? Describe your pre-sleeping rituals. I sleep in a full-sized bed with two pillows. This is, I believe, rather standard.

2. What kind of books do you read? See the bar at right. As you can see from my blog template, I love books and I'm always reading something.

3. What are your neighbors like? There are eight condos on this floor, two empty. (Welcome to the age of foreclosure.) The six of us who remain are a pretty diverse lot: Newlyweds with a lot of tattoos, a couple that frequently has his college-aged son from a previous marriage staying with them, an older couple whose kids are gone but whose young granddaughter visits (and stops by to play with my cat, Reynaldo), a very nosy retiree, a family with a new baby, and me, the cat lady.

4. What's really creepy to you? Clowns. See? Even lovable George Bailey, Bedford Falls' favorite son, looks creepy in clown make-up.

5. What's your current fandom/obsession/addiction? The Beatles and the Cubs. If you needed to be told that, you don't come here often.

6. Do you prefer your junk food sweet, salty or savory? Yes. That's why I like Reese's Peanut Butter Cups so much.

7. What was the last thing you expensive bought? My airline ticket to Los Angeles (ORD-LAX) was $279.

8. What is your greatest fear? A plane crash.

9. Do you get cravings? If so, what do you crave? Yes. Mark Harmon.

10. What do you do to change your mood? Since Mark Harmon often isn't available, I listen to the Beatles.

11. What was the last meal you ate that you loved? Last weekend I had a huge, gut-buster breakfast of eggs, wheat toast, hashbrowns and a ribeye steak. And then I took a long nap.

12. Do you want to learn another language? If so, why? I am taking a weekend crash-course in Spanish this winter. I think it'll be fun. I chose Spanish because I have a friend and a coworker who are both fluent and can help me stay sharp.

13. What's something that you'd like to say to someone right now? "Come play with me." I miss my best friend very much.

14. What are you looking forward to? I have a lot of vacation time scheduled between now and the end of the year.

She's home

My friend's daughter is out of the hospital, back in the New York apartment she shares with her fiance, and planning a small wedding.

Her leukemia is in remission, yet she needs another round of chemotherapy and doctors are very guarded about her chances of surviving 5 years. This confuses Ed, because he loves his daughter and wants definitive answers where it seems there aren't any.

But while it doesn't look like she has a long and healthy life ahead of her, her death is no longer imminent. Last month they were rushing ahead with a small wedding because they believed his daughter's condition was terminal and she wanted to die married to the man she loves. Now the reason for the small, intimate wedding -- in New York instead of here in Chicago -- is that she doesn't want any of her girlfriends to see her gaunt and without hair.

Wanting to be a pretty bride is such a sweet, normal dream for a 24-year-old. Normalcy is just what this family needs right now, and this is very good news.

Well, that's done

My uncle was committed this week. He went into a hospital for tests on Tuesday and as of Friday, he was placed in a facility for seniors with Parkinson's.

He became a ward of the state back in March -- 8 months ago. Which means that the possibility of institutionalization has been hanging over his head for 8 months. That's how long it's taken the gears of bureaucracy to grind to this point. I don't doubt that losing his home and his freedom is awful for him, I'm grateful that it's finally over.

Everyone he meets for here on out will know him only as the man he is now: a broke and very ill old man who is not able to handle his own affairs. He won't have to pretend he is who he once was -- a dynamic self-made millionaire, a lion with the ladies, an athlete. Being able to let his guard down and be himself must be a relief.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Just What I Needed

1. Who was the last person who entered your life and was just what you needed? This past August, I met Bob and Margo. They're both in their 60s and have been together since college, more than 40 years. I met them at the Stadium Club, the exclusive bar for season-ticket holders within Wrigley Field. I may never see them again, but the time I spent with them had a real impact on me. Bob is newly retired and trying to adjust to all this time on his hands. Margo is having no trouble at all -- filled with ideas for cruises and projects. The thing I liked about them was their warmth, their obvious love for one another, and their unabashed Cub fandom. Margo actually carries a signed photo of herself with Ryan Theriot in the same album that features pictures of her grandchildren! They represent karma -- people who are nice and hardworking who played by the rules finally getting to enjoy what they have coming. I liked how they welcomed into their midst based on nothing more than our shared love of the Cubs, which made me feel way less geeky about bleeding Cubbie blue. I guess they are real life role models for me, even though they probably don't think of themselves as anything special.

2. What is one of your fondest childhood memories? When I was 7, my parents surprised me by taking me and my oldest friend to see the Beatles' HELP! at a drive-in. I was riding my bike and the three of them pulled up in an unfamiliar car, a blue station wagon. My dad had swapped cars with a coworker so we could have the back of the wagon to bounce around in when we screamed and cried over The Lads.

3. What would you like to be doing in 7 years? I'd like to be like Bob and Margo, contented and comfortable and completely Cub obsessed.

4. Tell us about a blogging pet peeve. Dopey comments. Like the time I wrote a long post about how much I liked Little Women and how much it influenced my perception of romance. And a blogger I barely knew commented that she never liked that book. ARRGH!

5. Tell us about a general pet peeve. People who take up too much space in public -- like taking up the bench in the locker room for their iPods or water bottles, or an extra seat on the el for a briefcase or back pack.

6. For one day, who would you like to trade places with? Bob and Margo (see Q1). Or maybe I'd just like them to adopt me.

7. Where is your least favorite place to be? Doctor's office waiting room

8. What do you like about fall? My sweaters

9. If you or someone you know are chronically late, do you believe it's the result of poor planning or choosing to be late? In my case, yes to both. In the morning, when I don't feel like going to work, I find all kinds of things to do to distract me from getting ready.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 13 :: A band or artist that got you through some tough days (write a letter) If you can't guess what follows, you don't visit here often

I checked libraryonline.com (addressing people of title) for how to begin a letter to a member of the peerage ...

Dear Sir:
I love you the same way I love blue skies and cool breezes. Because while I remember with clarity the moment I first fell in love with you during that historic February, 1964 appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show, I don't really recall what my life was like before you, and contemplating it without you is like trying to conceive of no more blue skies or cool breezes.
You have always been there, always soothing me with your voice. I remember listening to "And I Love Her" as my wobbly propeller plane made its way over the Gulf of Mexico because I somehow knew I wouldn't die while listening to you. When I suddenly became terrified as I dressed for my high school graduation ceremony because it not only meant the end of something I hated, it also meant the beginning of something unknown, I played "Get Back" over and over again. I have turned to "My Brave Face" when my heart was breaking and "No More Lonely Nights" when it was soaring.
I fell in love with you when I was 6 years old because you were so damn pretty with those bottomless brown eyes, impossibly long lashes and perfectly straight nose. And because your voice sounded exactly like it should, coming from that little rosebud mouth. I'm grateful that now, as you have passed your 68th birthday, I can see that I cast my lot with a man who has turned out to be worthy of such devotion. You and your first wife enjoyed a touching love story, sticking together through good times and bad and raising four kids who grew up to be productive adults (who all somehow managed to avoid brawls and rehab and the other pitfalls that plague celebrity children). You overcame career adversity -- finding yourself unemployed with the demise of the most famous band ever when you were just 28 -- and reinvented yourself. You could rest on your considerable laurels but you don't, still making new music and working harder than you need to with your live shows. You have lost both your parents, the Lovely Linda and many of your boyhood chums, and your second marriage was a humiliating debacle, but you have never gone under. I have come to realize that your real beauty is your talent, dignity and strength.
Thanks for sharing it with us.

Hurray!

My niece just found she was accepted by the school of her dreams! The timing couldn't be more perfect, because she's touring their campus this weekend.

I am immensely proud of, and excited for, her.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 12 :: Something you never get compliments on My pretty face. Because I don't have one. Even my own mother said I was "cute but not what you'd consider pretty."

Get Well, Jane Fonda

From USA Today:

Jane Fonda, 72, discovered a small tumor in her breast during a routing checkup a few weeks ago, her rep is confirming.

Here's to a talented and brave lady.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 11 :: Something people seem to compliment you the most on My presentation skills. I am enthusiastic and think fast on my feet. At this job, it almost seems as though my ability to sell the work is appreciated more than the work itself. OR, among people who don't really know me, my green eyes.

Today we celebrate those who served

Happy Veteran's Day.
And thank you.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 10 :: Someone you need to let go or wish you didn’t know
My oldest friend's daughter. I believe she's a nice girl, deep inside, but she's running amok, and I'm sorry I know about it. A high school freshman, she began smoking pot and cigarettes over the summer, has been making out with other girls, and posts comments like "Itz Halloween motherfuckers" and "u r a fag but my fag" on her Facebook page.

I have mentioned to my oldest friend that her daughter needs a tighter leash, that more attention should be paid, but to no avail. I realize that since I am a barren spinster, mothers don't appreciate my parenting tips. I plan to "unfriend" the girl if things don't look different by the end of the month. Reading her words and learning of her activities bother me, and there's nothing I can do about it, so knowing it serves no purpose.

I Want Wednesday

I want $455. To stay on budget, I need $740 to get me to payday on Tuesday. I have $285 in my checking account. Uh-oh. Fortunately, there's an Illinois State Lotto drawing tonight, so I don't need worry too much.

10 on Tuesday

10 Things Cynthia Lennon Whines About

To the uninitiated, Cynthia Powell Lennon Bassanini Twist Charles was the first wife of Beatle John. She wrote the story of their life together and, while I freely admit her story deserves to be told -- after all, of everyone who was intimately involved with the group that would become the Beatles beginning in the 1950s, only she and Sir Paul are left -- her book was so fantastically, fabulously annoying because all she does is whine. And whine. And whine. She is never happy, and she seems to think that many of the "obstacles" she had to overcome were unique to her. This passive-aggressive nit accomplishes the impossible: she makes Yoko seem preferable.

It's 300+ pages covering more than 20 years of Beatle/Lennon history ... and Cynthia's discomfort with the food, the accommodations and the people she encountered along the way. Here's just a snippet:

1) Her first home on her own, a room in a Liverpool boarding house, was old and small and needed a fresh paint job. (I know, the HORROR!)

2) John's Aunt Mimi, who had raised him and was, therefore, her defacto mother in law, didn't think Cynthia was good enough for him. (I know, that never happens)

3) Even though she had passed her twenty-second birthday when she discovered she was pregnant with son Julian, she complains that no one had explained contraception to her. (Apparently there were no libraries, drugstores or doctors' offices in England in the early 1960s; odd because Paul McCartney's biographies recount how very familiar he and the other Beatles were with condoms at that time.*)

4) As per manager Brian Epstein's edict, John and Cynthia "had" to keep their marriage a secret. Apparently Brian convinced John that a Beatle with a wife and a baby was bad for the group's image. This made Cyn sad. (As did most things.) She wanted to be able to shout that she was Mrs. John Lennon!

5) Then, when her identity became known, fans mobbed her! (What did she think they would do?)

6) Some fans said rude things to her. (Shocking.)

7) The fans that didn't say rude things to her cooed over her baby. (I know, I know, the bitches.)

8) After John became famous, many celebrities came to their home for dinner. Yet they didn't really talk much to Cynthia and never commented on her cooking. (Boo hoo.)

9) Except Mike Nesmith of the Monkees and his wife, Priscilla. When they came for dinner, Priscilla actually sat with Cyn in the kitchen and annoyed her by watching her prepare dinner! (Boo! Hiss!)

10) After John left her, none of the Beatles, Beatles wives or Beatle employees would have anything to do with her. Except Paul. Who defied John and came over one day with a rose for Cyn and a song he'd composed for Julian, "Hey, Jules, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better ..." Sound familiar? Isn't it a sweet story? NO, IT'S NOT! Not really! For while John was divorcing Cyn, he was distancing himself from Paul, and Cyn suspects coming to see her was just Paul's way of showing John he was his own man.


* As the story goes, he tacked some condoms onto a dressing room wall in Hamburg and lit them with a match to protest George's deportation for being under age. This stunt got Paul sent back to Liverpool as well. Hey, he was not yet 20. Boys do dumb ass things -- even boys who grow up to be knighted.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 9 :: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted
I have a completely adorable friend who I haven't heard from in a year. And shame on me! For a guy who is such a guy (100% Oscar without a touch a Felix), he is so sweet and thoughtful. His birthday is coming up and I am going to celebrate it with a card and a call/email. So help me God.

ABC Meme

Boosted from Kwizgiver --because she shares!

A – Age: 52 years

B – Bed size: Full

C – Chore you hate: All of them. I am staggeringly lazy.

D – Dog’s name: I never had a dog of my own, though the woman next door let me play with hers -- a little yellow ball of fluff named Sparky. He was very dear.

E – Essential start your day item: Coke

F – Favorite color: Cubby blue. ("Eamus catuli" is latin for "Let's Go, Cubs!")

G – Gold or Silver: Silver

H – Height: 5’2"

I – Instruments you play: None

J – Job title: Associate Creative Director

K – Kid(s): none of my own

L – Living arrangements: Two br condo

M – Mom’s name: Trina

N – Nicknames: My grandpa called me "Ish Kabibble Boo."

O – Overnight hospital stay other than birth: Uterine fibroid embolization

P – Pet Peeve(s): People who take up an extra seat on the train for their backpacks and briefcases. Unless your backpack or briefcase bought a fare, it shouldn't get it's own seat.

Q – Quote from a movie: "I'm talking Julie Andrews twirling around like a mental patient on a mountaintop kind of happy." The Sixth Sense

R – Right or Left handed: right

S – Siblings: one older sister, one younger

T – Time you wake up: well, my alarm goes off at 6:00, and I lay there and watch the local news for a half hour

U -Underwear: White cotton granny panties

V – Vegetable you dislike: Tomatoes

W – Ways you run late: I distract myself with things completely unrelated to getting ready for work

X – X-rays you’ve had: Shoulder and dental and mammograms

Y – Yummy food you make: I only have one recipe: apple banana cake

Z- Zodiac Sign: Sagittarius.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 8 :: Someone who made your life like hell, or treated you like shit When I was in high school, one of my relatives molested me. Since he was newly widowed and "depressed," my mother actually encouraged me to have dinner with him one Sunday. Soon he had his hand between my breasts and his tongue in my ear. I insisted he take me home, but I initially didn't tell anyone. My mother was so distraught over his wife's death that I was afraid she couldn't handle it. This emboldened him, and every time we were in the same room he spoke dirty to me. His perverse game continued for more than 2 decades, when I was 38. During a family gathering -- with my toddler niece, my mom and my grandmother right there -- he leaned in and asked me how I masturbated. He knew I wouldn't make a scene and he got off on it.

A switch inside me was flipped that night. I vowed he would never speak to me that way again, and I haven't allowed it to happen. My mom and my sisters now know what he did to me. It isn't so much that they don't believe me as that they wish I'd just get over it already. It was so much easier before, when I just went along and kept the peace.

He's very old now. I wish he'd just die and get it over with, because I often wonder how I'm going to handle his funeral. A pillar of the church, many of the out-of-town cousins think he's aces, a patriarch worthy of respect, and will undoubtedly wonder why I'm not at his wake/funeral. I have too much respect for death and God to pretend a grief I won't feel, I don't know that I feel like covering for him, and I don't have the stomach to dredge it all up and explain to the cousins.

And it pisses me off that I suffer all this agita over something that never was my fault.

Gee, this was cheery, wasn't it?

Movie Monday -- Hated It

Share on the worst movie you've ever seen, linking back here at The Bumbles. And don't forget to visit your fellow participants!

There are some bad movies I luxuriate in, the way others slide into a warm bath. Have you ever seen Valley of the Dolls? Attack of the Puppet People? There's a genius to how awful-yet-watchable these films are.

Then there are the movies that just suck. They have no entertainment value whatsoever. Here are two. Never watch these movies. Save yourself.

Love Happens. Aren't love stories touching? Isn't Jennifer Aniston adorable? Isn't Aaron Eckhart handsome? Isn't Martin your favorite Sheen? How bad could a love story starring these three be? Oh. My. God. You have no idea how bad. 109 minutes of my life I'll never get back.

City Heat. It stars Clint Eastwood and Burt Reynolds, with Jane Alexander and Rip Torn in supporting roles. So you can expect it to be high quality and campy fun, right? WRONG. It's beyond bad, it's insultingly stupid. Too dull to watch, too many car crashes and shoot outs to sleep through. AVOID AT ALL COSTS.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 7 :: Someone who has made your life worth living for. Jesus. This life is my gift and testament to Him. I am imperfect -- too often selfish and lazy -- but I really do try to be the woman He believes I can be.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: The 14 Question Meme

Cheers to all of us thieves!

1. What do you consider your hometown to be? Chicago

2. What’s the hardest part of your average day? Getting there, wherever "there" happens to be. I find it hard to leave for work at a reasonable time, or once I'm there it's hard to put my pencil down and come home, or haul my fat ass to the health club.

3. The easiest? Why? Feeding the felines. Tending to them always makes me happy. My cats were all shelter rescues, and I'm so pleased to know that they went from being stray or abandoned to enjoying mealtimes in my kitchen.

4. What beverage do you reach for to quench your thirst? Coke.

5. What is one not-so-secret goal you have for your life? I’ll let you keep your secret ones to yourself. Getting -- and staying! -- organized here at home.I made a serious attempt over the summer and made real headway, but now I'm overrun with paper again.

6. What physical pain do you fear most? For example, I’m trying to decide how bad my jaw pain needs to get before I risk a potential needle from my dentist. So, for me, throbbing is preferable to jabbing. Migraines! They are brutal, I literally cannot move without pain so excruciating that I'm nauseous. And have you ever tried to vomit without moving? If I don't take my football-shaped prescription Naproxen at the very first sign of pain, I'm resigned to first hours of misery and then the hours of sleep required for healing and then I've sacrificed a day to a freaking headache.

7. Where do you find solace? I find that little happens in life that can't be made better by listening to the Beatles or watching Cubs baseball.

8. What makes you the saddest when you read/see the news? Senseless violence. Some stories really get under my skin. One was Nailah Franklin, the young woman whose family and friends were mobilized and passionate, trying to enlist the entire city in the search to save her. It was too awful when, days later, her body was found. Another was Blair Holt, the honor student who lost his life on the way home from school when he pushed a classmate out of the line of gangbanger fire. When I develop my globes for Mimi's Blogblast for Peace, it's not Afghanistan or Iraq or Darfur that I'm thinking of. I dream of my hometown, the day when there will be no more victims like Nailah Franklin and Blair Holt.

9. What do you eat for a favorite snack? Apple slices. Plain, or with cinnamon, or caramel or cheese, if you don't mind.

10. What movie could you/would you watch more than two or three times and still enjoy just as much as the first time? The Way We Were. I love how at the beginning of the movie, Hubbell is the gorgeous golden boy "for whom everything comes too easily," and Katie is all unfashionably sharp elbows and passion. He allows himself to give up what was truly important to him in order to keep his life easy, comfortable and neutral. By the end of the movie, while Hubbell is subdued and just kinda pale, she is still vibrant, still enthusiastic, still fighting for what she believes in. To thine own self be true! Of course, some day I'd like to see a movie where the heroine manages to maintain her individuality and get the gorgeous guy.

11. What boy/girl first made you cry? I truly don't remember. I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing.

12. What brand of coffee/tea do you drink most often? I hate, loathe, despise and abominate coffee. The brand of tea in my kitchen right now is Bigelow.

13. Dig in the dirt with or without garden gloves? I don't have a garden.

14. James Taylor or Carly Simon? Why must I choose?