Right? Moral? Christian?

Every day I see children that no one wants, who have no home. I live next to a licensed, accredited children's home which cares for kids until foster homes can be found. My living room window looks out over their play area. These children laugh, ride bikes, play in the sand box and sit on the swings, just like any other kids in a playground. All races are represented, but according to my unscientific observation, most are white.

No one wants these kids.

Their mothers, for whatever reason, chose to give birth to these children; obviously they were not aborted. Yet they are wards of the state because no one wants them.

That's why these "snowflake adoptions" REALLY piss me off.

People are actually adopting unfertilized embryos from clinics. This "saves" the contents of a test tube from being "destroyed" in order to help find a cure for Parkinson's, diabetes, Alzheimer's, etc.

The contents of a test tube don't know what it's like to be abandoned. Even if your religion teaches that the contents of these test tubes represent life, you have to agree that they don't have to go to school with children who have families. They don't know the pain of being separated from their siblings.

The contents of a test tube doesn't know terror, or loneliness, or confusion, or fear because unfertilized embryos cannot feel.

Yet passionate pro-lifers encourage these "snowflake adoptions" when healthy, lovable and loving children like the ones next door live day after day without anyone wanting them.

Politically, the candidates and office holders who promote these "snowflake adoptions" are also the ones who are anti-choice, who want every pregnancy to end in a birth. They should come look out my window at these children that no one wants and encourage adoption. Adoption of children -- not babies, and especially not pre-babies!


These candidates and office holders maintain that "snowflake adoptions" are the right, moral, Christian thing to do.

My Christian faith tells me something very different, especially when I'm looking out my living room window. Perhaps these good Christians would like to explain to the little girl wearing the hand-me-down windbreaker going down the slide why the contents of a test tube deserve a good home before she can get one.

According to our government (the Federal Citizen Information Center), there are currently 75,000 to 100,000 children in foster care awaiting adoption.

Giving the Diva His Due

Carlos Zambrano gave up only 3 hits in 8 very solid innings at The Cell. Soriano, Ramirez and Pie each had a good game, but Zambrano's was really great.

Today was, of course, more than just another away game. Because it was against the White Sox, it was an away game in front of plenty of hometown fans. Beating the Sox is like beating the Cardinals -- it's important for fan morale and team momentum.

So congratulations, Carlos Zambrano, on a performance that was even more impressive than the box score shows.

Friday's Feast #4

Appetizer
Name a funny habit you have.
It makes me crazy when the toilet paper is in the holder backwards. It should be rolled over the top with the new sheet in the front. If I'm in a friend's bathroom or in a restaurant ladies' room and it's wrong, I fix it.

Soup
If you could instantly know how to play a musical instrument, which one would you pick?
The guitar.

Salad
How long is your hair?
It's short. Julie-Andrews-in-the-Sound-of-Music short.

Main Course
When was the last time you forgave someone, and who was it?
This past Tuesday. A former coworker I haven't heard from in a while emailed me out of the clear blue, asking for help with his resume. I was kinda busy at work so I set it aside for a free moment. In the interim, he shot me an "are-you-there/when-can-I-get-it?" email. At first I was pissed. I mean, this was all pretty presumptive on his part, wasn't it? Then I realized that, for him to act in such a thoughtless way, he must be under a lot of stress, so I forgave him.


Dessert
What is your favorite kitchen appliance?
The microwave! I'm into immediate gratification, and this makes it almost possible.

Read more Friday Feasts, or add your own, at http://fridaysfeast.com/?cat=2

Thursday Thirteen 21 -- You can only LOVE one each

Thirteen Either/Ors that THE GAL HERSELF has definite feelings about In Pulp Fiction, Mia (Uma Thurman) opines that when it comes to Elvis and the Beatles, you can like them both, but the odds are that you only LOVE one of them. When last week, Mo asked if my iPod playlist included Dean Martin in addition to Sinatra, I realized that was a similar situation. You can like them both, but you can only LOVE one of them. And so here's where I come down on 13 important “either/or’s.” 1…. Beatles or Elvis? I respect the King, but I LOVE the Lads. 2. Frank Sinatra or Dean Martin? It’s Frank’s world. Still. 3. Katharine Hepburn or Audrey Hepburn? The Great Kate 4. Chicago Cubs or White Sox? Let’s see … I have no visible tattoos and don’t drink beer at breakfast. That obviously makes me a Cub fan. 5. Thin crust or deep dish? Thin crust 6. Cats or dogs? Dogs make fine pets, but I simply must cohabit with at least one cat at all times 7. Turkey or ham? If it’s not turkey, it’s not a holiday meal 8. Coke or Pepsi? Coke 9. City or country? City 10. Angelina or Jen? I’m strictly Team Aniston. 11. Today or GMA? Today 12. Sandals or flip-flops? Sandals 13. Mac or PC? Mac Extras: My male friends assure me that no list like this is complete without ... Ginger or Mary Ann? Boxers or briefs? Beil or Alba? Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. Gabriella takes us on a tour of US sites she's like to see 2. MommyBa takes us all around the world on her fantasy trip 3. Impworks invites us to look at both his TT AND his landmark 500th post 4. Pussreboots has a romantic, rosey TT 5. Visit the characters of Trevor's Song by visiting Susan's TT 6. Joan shares inspirational lyrics on her TT 7. L^2 has a Google-inspired TT 8. Andrea shares her most watched (& rewatched) movies 9. Jenny's TT is the Songs of Her Life 10. Vader's Mom reflects on her paths not taken 11. Nancy's timely TT is about the Sumer Solstice 12. Titania's TT is about movies so funny they can cure whatever ails you 13. Courtney's TT tells us how surfers found her blog 14. Young Mommy's TT keeps kids cool 15. Tinkerbell's TT fills us in on Litha 16. Nancy shares her yummy cookout menu 17. Mo, who inspired my TT, has a musical one of her own 18. Miss Frou Frou gives the Southern Hemisphere equal time with a TT about the Winter Solstice 19. Gattina compares and contrasts childhood and adultshood 20. Mammalee invites us into her home with her TT 21. Nicki's TT is her vacation planner 22. Cindy's TT are the top movies according to the AFI 23. Bernie's TT is seaworthy 24. Qtpies lets us know why she needs a job

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Together again!

Michael Barrett, my beloved's Cubs battery mate, has been traded to the Padres. Which means Barrett and Maddux will be together again.

I'm sorry to see Barrett go, but I understand the reasoning. After the unfortunate dugout/lockerroom fight with Zambrano, either Barrett or Zambrano had to be traded … fast. Zambrano is worth more and comes with a bigger price tag, and it's possible no team offered us enough to give up our (gulp!) best pitcher.

And if Barrett had to go, I'm glad he's reunited with my beloved future Hall of Famer. "Reunited and it feels so good ..."

Ah! Al!

I'm watching the American Film Institute tribute to Al Pacino. Lordie, I love him. He's both a terrific actor and a charismatic movie star. It's a powerful combo platter, and I'm grateful to him for all those hours of pleasure in the dark. (Yeah, I know how dirty that sounds but I'm leaving it as is. Consider it a tribute to the crush I had on Al as Serpico. You could dive into those deep brown eyes!)

The Godfather saga, Frankie & Johnnie, Donnie Brasco, Dog Day Afternoon, The Devil's Advocate, And Justice for All ... All good movies made even more memorable by Al's magnetic presence.

The only one I don't get, frankly, is Scarface. Tony Montana a pathetic loser who is too stupid to see that there's only one way his story could end. Al's performance is so far over the top I couldn't possibly care about this thug and I found myself getting bored. And yet I know men who can recite lines to this movie as if it was Caddy Shack or Top Gun. I see kids wearing Tony Montana t-shirts and snapping up posters. People, this man was an unredeemable idiot!

I think Scarface might be like The Three Stooges ("a guy thing").

I accept no substitutes

My different friends play different roles in this little reality show I call a life. And I find they are most definitely NOT interchangeable.

My oldest friend, the one I've known since Kindergarten, is my touchstone. She knows my history, my secrets, and how I got here. She went through a bad patch recently but is emerging from it with both her genial mood and awesome sense of humor restored. But she's not the same as my best friend.

There's the man I've referred to on this blog as John. We've known one another a quarter of a century and in some ways, he raised me. His sensitivity to, and genuine interest in, others makes him the soul of tolerance. He also REALLY ratcheted up my party threshold over the years. But he's not the same as my best friend.

My best friend trusts me and shares with me. He encourages me to do the same with him. He sees me as I am and accepts me. When he is busy and unhappy and distracted like he's been lately, I miss him. HIM. If I simply wanted company, I'd be completely content spending time with my oldest friend or John. But as wonderful as they are, they aren't my best friend. And sometimes, no one else will do.

5 Reasons Why I Blog

Jenny McB tagged me to share 5 reasons why I blog. My initial response is, "FIVE? I don't know that I have 5 reasons!" So I'll guess we'll find out together as I compose my answer ...

1. It's a journal that I keep for myself. Now that I've been doing this for over a year, it's interesting to look back 12 months and see who I was and what I was up to. It's easier for me to keep a journal this way -- as opposed to moving pen and ink across paper -- because I can do this almost any time. I can quickly begin a post anywhere, including at work, save it and finish it later. It's harder to do that with a bound journal. Also I can type faster than I can write, which makes the act of getting my thoughts down less frustrating. And lastly, Blogger keeps it all neat and tidy for me. If I had a journal, God only knows how I'd organize it, where I'd leave it, and if I'd ever find it again!

2. I like the window it gives me into other people's lives. I always thought that it would be fun to be a mail carrier because I'd know what magazines my neighbors read and I'd learn from the postcards where their friends went on vacation. Blogging gives me a harmless way to indulge in voyeurism.

3. Getting it off my chest. Sometimes things weigh on me, or delight me, that my day-to-day acquaintances aren't interested in. Writing it here, watching the words go from brain to fingertips to the white screen, seeing it in front of me, helps me deal with it and get past it. Or, if it's something happy, it helps me appreciate it more.

4. Communication. I didn't expect this -- it's a delightful bonus. I knew when I started blogging that there was a possibility that people would read this thing. I never considered how it would feel. I like it. I enjoy knowing people are listening. It's a good experiment in self-exploration because I can say things here without concern for the impact it would have on my family, friends or coworkers. Here I'm just another anonymous gal.

5. It's kind of a "bus man's holiday" for me. I'm a writer by trade. I work for an advertising agency and I get assignments from clients. "Write a brochure about this or that by eod Friday." Consequently I'm never at a loss for words; they're my job. But I never get to choose the subject! Thanks to this blog, I have rediscovered how pleasurable writing for writing's sake can be.

So I could come up with 5 after all! Why not circle back and check Jenny's response to this same questions so you can compare, contrast, and think about your own 5 reasons. If you'd like, leave word in the comments that you've posted your response.

Highly uncomfortable

My beloved future Hall of Famer Greg Maddux is pitching against my guys. Within the beautiful confines. I'm almost in pain.

Of course I want Derek Lee to have a spectacular day after what happened yesterday. Of course I want Jacque Jones to snap out of his slump. But why, oh why, do they have to do it against my beloved? How could fate be this cruel?

In my heart of hearts, I'm pulling for Maddog. I will not have many more opportunities like this to luxuriate in his performance. Besides, it's Father's Day! Last I heard, Rich Hill was engaged but as of yet childless, and Greg Maddux is the father of Amanda and Chase.

Handicapping the field

Like many of us, I've got the 2008 Democratic Presidential nominees on my mind. On balance, I like my choices. Certainly any one of the Top Tier Dems would be a refreshing change from the current administration and offer me far more positive, inclusive options than the Republicans.

It's important to note that I was a proud Clintonista in 1992 and 1996. I worked even harder and was more dedicated to John Kerry's campaign. I believed in the Senator so much that his defeat didn't even seem like a possibility to me, and the outcome of that election quite literally broke my heart. I was so dispirited that while I want to back another candidate with all I have, it could just be that my heart is a bit more impenetrable this time. That could explain why I see as many weaknesses as strengths in the current field.

Hillary Clinton. On the plus side, she is a much better debater than I expected her to be. She's strong, she's certain and she's smart. She appears to be in control and highly competent, instead of inflexible or shrill. But when she talks about health care, when she talks about her husband's administration, she reminds us that she's the Establishment. While the Clinton years were very good for many of us, it's days gone by, pre-9/11. Will Clinton policies work in today's world, without Bill at the helm? Also, the Clinton years were scandal-ridden, and while the Lewinsky affair was indeed just that, and easy for the public to grasp, the murkier, financial issues were all hers. While I believe that Whitewater never should have been examined the way it was, I also doubt that Hillary's financial dealings were altogether honest and legal. Perhaps spending her entire adult life with the original Hakuna Matata Kid necessarily made her someone who believes that the ends justify the means. Maybe as far as venal sins go, I understand lust (Bill) more than greed (Hillary). But her past behavior is a constant little annoyance to me, like a pebble in my shoe.

Barack Obama. I'm a proud Chicagoan, so I'd love to see him go all the way and land in the White House. I get such a kick out of watching the enthusiastic crowds he draws. It would be terrific if we had someone in the White House who made us feel like we could be more and better than we are and who, as Dallek said of JFK, appealed to our better angels. But his performance gets a bit worrisome when it comes to policy and details. And, as a Chicagoan, I know Obama's political background and while there's nothing there that I think should disqualify him as President, there's a lot that may make him mighty uncomfortable when the national press grabs onto it. (Remember these names: Alexi Giannoulias, Tony Rezko, Dorothy Tillman and Todd Stroger.) Cook County politics can sound much more tawdry when discussed by Tim Russert or George Stephanopolous, and I worry that Obama may have a glass jaw. He's gotten very far without ever having seriously been challenged and I'm not sure he can take it with grace.

John Edwards. First of all, I think he's completely delicious, and I may be holding that against him. I never imagined I'd have a crush on a candidate, and it kinda gives me the willies. I love that Edwards doesn't allow Iraq to dominate every conversation about 2008. I love that he so forcefully discusses Katrina and poverty and the environment in moral terms -- I'm so sick of the other side pretending to be "better" or "more Christian" because of their narrow views on reproductive freedom and gay rights. The Edwards approach gives us moral leadership without beating us over the head with his internal relationship with his God. So far this century, I have felt as though my Christian faith has been hijacked and our proud American tradition of the separation between church and state has been assailed. John Edwards gives us a sound, decent, spiritual alternative and I think for that reason his candidacy is very important. But as with Hillary, when it comes to John Edwards I feel like there's a pebble in my shoe. It bothers me that The Boys from Boston (Senators Kerry and Kennedy) aren't supporting him. These are the two legislators who know him best, and yet when it comes to endorsing Edwards, they're both mute. If John Kerry believed he was qualified to be a heartbeat away from the Presidency in 2004, what's going on now?

Al Gore. I'm not crazy about his little striptease about running. It's an honor to hold the office of President, and we shouldn't have to BEG him to go for it. But he is knowledgeable about world affairs and highly regarded internationally and even though he's the Establishment, too, his passionate involvement with the global climate crisis makes him seem equally as much about the future as the past. I don't think, though, that he's going to run.

Whew! I am long-winded, aren't I?

So I guess that right now, I'd be comfortable voting for any of these four candidates. But I want to be passionately FOR one of them. I want to be comfortable nagging my friends for money, I want to be comfortable working the phones and writing letters. And while I'm hopeful that one of them will woo me and win my heart, we aren't there yet.

My fantasy dad

My father died more than 15 years ago. We had a sad, tempestuous and unfortunate relationship and, to be very honest, I don't miss him. I'm no longer angry at him -- I accept that while he may not have been the father I deserved, he's the one I got. But just because I don't miss HIM, it doesn't mean I don't miss having a kind, empathic father.

I still long to have a dad like Andy Taylor.

Remember the episode about Mr. McBeevee? Opie comes to the courthouse and the dinner table with tales of his new friend, a man who jingles when he walks along the tops of the trees. Aunt Bea, Andy and Barney are all amused by Opie's imaginary friend ... until Opie comes up with money he claims McBeevee gave him. Barney recommends discipline. Andy asks Opie again, one more time, to look him in the eye and tell him where he got the money. Opie again, tearful with frustration, insists the source was Mr. McBeevee. Andy says OK then, if Opie says the money came from McBeevee, it did. Barney is astonished. "Do you believe in McBeevee?" he asks. "No," Andy replies, "but I believe in Opie." That moment is the episode highlight for me. Before the end of the half hour, Andy gets to meet Mr. McBeevee. He's a repairman for the telephone company, working on the lines, which explains how Opie saw him "walking along the top of the trees."

Or my favorite, "Opie the Birdman." Opie acquires a slingshot and, like Atticus in To Kill a Mockingbird, Andy warns Opie not to shoot at the trees. Opie ignores the admonition and accidentally kills a mother bird. Opie impresses his father by making good and adopting the dead bird's babies. Naming them Winkin, Blinkin and Nod, he keeps them safe in a cage and feeds them worms. Finally, tenderly, Andy explains that it's time to let the birds go. That their ability to fly and care for themselves means that Opie did a good job of raising them. Opie does the right thing, but it's painful for him. After the birds take off, Opie looks at the cage and comments sadly that it sure seems empty. Andy replies that may be true, "but don't the trees sound nice and full?"

Andy taught Opie (and in a way, this gal) life lessons with tenderness, humanity and understanding. He was a wonderful male role model. Strong enough to have a gun but not carry it, wise enough to trust what he couldn't see.

I don't know anything about the real Andy Griffith, whether he has kids or what their relationship is. I don't want to know. I'd rather cherish the idealized version we can still see on TvLand.

Even more than Jackie O

Here's the one lady I admire beyond all others: Charlotte A. Cavatica. She was a true friend and a good writer, two lofty goals to which I aspire.

She saw the best in everyone from a runt pig to a sarcastic rat. Her warmth and generosity transformed her in the eyes of her barnmates and she went from being scary and creepy to beautiful. She took her promises seriously and used all her tenacity and imagination to keep the one she made to Wilbur.

My mom read Charlotte's Web to me when I was a little girl. I can still hear her voice saying, "Some pig!" It's one of my dearest memories. And to this day, I have never intentionally killed a spider. If I find one at home, I wrap it in a tissue and carry it downstairs. It's the least I can do in tribute to one of my earliest and most enduring role models.

Friday's Feast #3

Appetizer
Fill in the blank: The best thing about where I live is the second place/just beat the Mariners/did I mention I love Lou Pinella Chicago Cubs.

Soup
Create a new name for a deodorant (like “Flower Fresh” or “Shower Scent”).
Completely Inoffensive

Salad
What was the last piece of software you installed onto your computer?
Mozilla Upgrade

Main Course
If you were to receive a superlative award today beginning with the words ”Most likely to…”, what would the rest of the phrase say?
"Most likely to be the hub that connects my network of friends"

Dessert
What two colors do you like to wear together?
Forest green and blue denim (what I'm wearing to work today)


If you are still hungry for more Feasts, or want more information about the Friday Feast meme, click here.

So hello, Gorgeous!

Last night I went to a $15/head fundraiser for John Edwards at a Loop bar. I'm still undecided as to who I'm for, but it was only $15. Considering how expensive campaigns are, and how long we have to go before a single Iowan casts a vote, $15 doesn't seem like much of a commitment, does it?

The Edwards campaign is very smart. Hillary grew up in the Chicagoland area, and Bill is still much beloved around these parts. Obama is our senator. And yet the evening news showed that Edwards drew an overflow crowd, with supporters waiting outside, waiting patiently but ultimately unsuccessfully, to get in. Of course, it helps that the bar the campaign chose only held about 200.

John Edwards is the best-looking man I've ever seen (in real life). I was just about 3 feet away from the stage so I got a very good look at him. He's not Hugh Grant or Benjamin Bratt handsome, but then who knows how good they look within 3 feet? Edwards has completely beautiful eyes, improbably wrinkle-free skin and yes, the hair is gorgeous. He may not be movie/tv star handsome, but he's definitely anchorman handsome.

Handsome is as handsome does. I admire Elizabeth so much and am so grateful for her book, her wisdom, and her example. But blue eyes and a terrific wife are not reasons to elect a man President! I just wish Edwards, or Hillary, or Obama would do something that would make me believe with all my heart. I don't want to be undecided. Come on, Dems! INSPIRE ME!

Thursday Thirteen #20 -- The Gal's iPod on Shuffle

Thirteen Songs that were chosen at random by THE GAL HERSELF'S iPod This week I’m letting my iPod do all the work. Here are the first 13 songs that came up when I put it on “shuffle.” (I know this seems very lazy. But remember, I had to download all the songs!) When I’m on “shuffle,” I like to pretend I’m listening to WGAL, the radio station that broadcasts just for me. None of these tunes are that embarrassing, and fortunately, no Andy Williams Christmas songs popped up. (And yes, as my boss likes to point out, my dream playlist doesn't include anything from this century.) 1. She’s Got You. Patsy Cline. “I’ve got your picture that you gave to me. And it’s signed with love, just like it used to be. The only thing different, the only thing new, I’ve got your picture, she’s got you.” 2. You Don’t Own Me. Leslie Gore. “Don’t tell me what to do, don’t tell me what to say. And please, when I go out with you, don’t put me on display.” 3. Whatever Gets You Through the Night. John Lennon. “Whatever gets you through the night is alright, is alright. Do it wrong or do it right, it’s alright, it’s alright. Don’t need a watch to waste your time, oh no.” 4. Try (Just a Little Bit Harder). Janis Joplin. “I’m gonna try just a little bit harder so I can give, give, give him every bit of my soul. I’m gonna try just a little bit harder so I can love, love, love him with no control.” 5. In the Wee Small Hours of the Morning. Sinatra. “When your lonely heart has learned it lesson, you’d be hers if only she would call. In the wee small hours of the morning, that’s the time you miss her most of all.” 6. Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me. Mel Carter. “Hold me, hold me, never let me go until you’ve told me, told me what I want to know and then just hold me, hold me. Make me tell you I’m in love with you.” 7. I Call Your Name. The Beatles. “I call your name, but you’re not there. Was I to blame for being unfair?” 8. Another Day. Paul McCartney. “Slipping into stockings, stepping into shoes, dipping in the pocket of her raincoat. It’s just another day.” 9. It Had to Be You. Barbra Streisand. “For nobody else gave me a thrill. For all your faults, I love you still. It had to be you, wonderful you, it had to be you.” 10. Even the Losers. Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers. “Baby even the losers get lucky sometimes. Even the losers keep a bit of the pride. They get lucky sometimes.” 11. Authority Song. John Mellencamp. “Growing up leads to growing old and then to dying. And dying to me don’t sound like all that much fun, so I fight authority and authority always wins. I been doing it since a young kid and I come out grinning. I fight authority and authority always wins. ” 12. Chain of Fools. Aretha Franklin. “You told me to leave you alone, my daddy says come on home, my doctor says, ‘take it easy.’ But your loving is much too strong. I’m added to your chain, chain, chain, Chain of Fools.” 13. Sweet Blindness. The Fifth Dimension. “Let’s go down by the grapevine, drink my daddy’s wine, get happy. Oh sweet blindness! A little magic, a little kindness." Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. Crimson Wife shares 13 things she misses about her "pre-mom" life 2. Impworks shares his colorful dice collection 3. Mama Kelly shares the chilling/fascinating things she's learned in anthropology class 4. Jenny McB jumps in to help a certain heiress with a list of "what Paris needs" 5. Thomma Lyn raises the curtain on the writing process and shares 13 elements of a really good novel 6. Wylie takes us up to Canada and proudly explains what Canadians have given the world 7. At least one of The Raven's 13 trivia tidbits will make it into your conversation tomorrow, I promise! 8. Check out 13 of Michelle's own paranormal titles. 9. Christine takes us through Jack Kerouac's writing process in her 13 10. Janet's 13 all begin with the letter Q, and if you play Scrabble, you'll love this. 11. Dorothy's 13 introduces us to her cat Gretchen. 12. Babe's 13 is both funny & practical: things to do with a corpse. 13. Go Inside Mo's Mind for her Flag Day TT. 14. Samulli's TT is musical, too.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

My mini Thursday 13 rant

It's Wednesday so I'm contemplating my TT. And I find myself getting pissed anew at a certain fellow blogger who will go nameless (unless I change my mind before I reach the end of this post).

She only reads me on Thursday. Never comes by any other time. And leaves annoying comments on my TT like, "I don't know any of those songs," or "I haven't heard of any of those people." Then she leaves her link.

What a rude little snot! I refuse to be pimped, used just to publish her link!

Especially since her recent TTs were about Calvin & Hobbs! Maybe if she read something in the newspaper beyond the comics, she would have heard of some of the people mentioned in my TT's.

Sigh. I feel better now. Thank you for listening.

All I wish I was, but aren't

Jacqueline Onassis. JBKO. She's my idol.

She was so self contained. No one knew what she was thinking or how she felt. Once she went out in public, wearing dark glasses that I suspect kept out much more than the sun, her demeanor was even and inscrutable. As one who blurts and wears her heart on her sleeve, I wish I was more like Jackie.

She did so much well. She was fluent in French and conversational in Spanish and Italian. She knew all the best gossip (she read voraciously about the Woody/Mia scandal), yet could discuss Baudelaire and Oscar Wilde, too. She had a soft voice, exceptionally good manners and an iron will, which proved to be a powerful combination and enabled to almost always do just about whatever she wanted. While she appreciated the best food, fine art, and classical music, she was also an animal lover, happy and comfortable on horseback or romping with a dog.

Effortlessly elegant, Jackie chose simple clothes in feminine colors that are still influential in fashion today. She liked accessories, but they never overpowered her look. You always noticed Jackie, not her outfit.

Her style wasn't limited to wardrobe. She had an unerring visual sense at home, too. In her book Living History, Hillary Clinton wrote of Jackie's apartment: "The first thing I noticed was that it was overflowing with books. They were stacked everywhere -- on and under tables, beside couches and chairs. Books were piled so high in her study that she could rest her plate on them if she was eating at her desk. She is the only person I've met who literally decorated her apartment with books -- and pulled it off." I know if I tried the same thing, I wouldn't be viewed as a trendsetter. I'd be the crazy-cat-lady-pack-rat.

Most of all, she was a profile in courage in her own right. Yes, everyone has seen the photos of Dallas and at Arlington Cemetery in November 1963. One of the most moving stories I've ever heard, though, takes place after JFK's funeral. After Jackie buried her husband before a worldwide TV audience, after she met privately and accepted condolences from world leaders at the White House. This woman -- who had been fired upon in an open car, who washed her husband's brains off her face, who mourned almost tearlessly before the nation, who had to face life not only without her husband, but without a home -- somehow managed to throw a birthday party for her 3 year old boy. I can't imagine what it must have been like for her, that day, after all she had been through, to adjust cone-shaped party hats on Kennedy cousin heads, express wonder when John-John unwrapped Mr. Potato Head and other toys, play pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey, serve cake and ice cream and sing. She had to appear to be having fun and convince her nieces and nephews that it was OK to do the same, too. After all, her son was only 3, and he didn't understand death but he did understand birthdays. She was his mother, she sucked it up and had the party. My throat closes a bit just thinking about the bravery involved in that preschool birthday party. I suspect most of us would have been in bed, behind closed doors, crying our eyes out in pain and loneliness and terror. But not Jackie. At least not until the last little Kennedy reveler had gone home.

She made it all look easy. It wasn't, of course. Underneath that impervious exterior, she was human and very vulnerable. That explains the chainsmoking and nailbiting. Knowing that doesn't make me admire her any less. I find it comforting that she may have appeared perfect, but she wasn't perfect.

School's out, and I still feel like I got a bad grade!

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	6.5
Mind:	6.5
Body:	5.9
Spirit:	7.5
Friends/Family:	4.4
Love:	4.3
Finance:	8.4
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

Oh well, the average for a woman my age is 6.3, so I guess I'm pretty ordinary. EWW! Ordinary! That makes me feel even worse!

May I speak seriously about ... Paris Hilton?

I admit it: I'm a news junkie. And unless you were watching CSpan, if you were watching cable news on Friday you were watching Paris coverage. And, believe it or not, this rather silly celebutant has alerted me to something serious.

Jail overcrowding.

Yes, it's one of those phrases that politicians bandy about during election campaigns -- or when they're making an argument for or against placing an incarceration facility near where you live. But the ramifications of overcrowding are seldom discussed.

Until Paris. Kathy Hilton's sweet, sheltered little girl may actually have done public a favor. I look at this photo and feel that anything positive she does is done by accident, but that's not the point.

Judges sentence convicted offenders, and the LA County Sheriff routinely lets them go after serving 10% of their sentence. And it's not because he believes the sentences are too harsh; it's because LA County doesn't have the resources to merely house -- much less rehabilitate -- these people. The results are far more serious than getting Paris back out onto the celebrity party circuit. According to the LA Times, "In the last five years, the Sheriff's Department has released more than 200,000 inmates early, including some who ended up committing murders and other serious crimes when they otherwise would have been behind bars."

I don't know what the answer to this is. I'm just now getting my mind around the problem. The issue used to be whether jailtime should be about justice, or punishment, or rehabilitation. Now I'm adding public safety to this syrupy stew. If convicts aren't even in jail, justice isn't being served, they aren't being punished, and they certainly aren't being rehabilitated. This brings us to taxes, and how we choose to spend those tax dollars on both a federal and a municipal level.

re·ha·bil·i·ta·tion
in·car·cer·a·tion

Wow! Such big words for a post about Paris Hilton!

I want an Elliott/Olivia romance

I've been watching the SVU Marathon off and on all day, and I'm convinced Elliott Staebler and Olivia Benson are in love and completely right for one another. Ah, romance against the backdrop of pedophilia, arson, and rape. I know it sounds kinda sick, but I think it would also be very life affirming. Isn't that a Buddhist proverb? Something about a lotus that grows out of the mud and blossoms above the dirty water? Amidst all this sin and degradation, Elliott's and Olivia's love could blossom and something beautiful could be borne.

Oh, I know, I know. It's just a TV show. But I can be such a cornball mush when it comes to romance.

(BTW, my cat Reynaldo seems to be gripped by the spectre of sexually-based offenses. He's actually being QUIET as I watch!)

A delicious little movie

Just saw Waitress, starring Keri Russell. It's funny and quirky and moving and touching and very original. If it's playing near you, get over to see it … fast, before the Pirates and Danny Ocean's con men and the knocked-up Grey's girl take over all the summer screens.

Keri Russell is completely charming. Best of all, Andy Griffith is in it. Not a cameo, a real part. It's lovely to see him again, even if he says things about one of his wives that Andy Taylor would never say about Helen Crump.

My movie-going experience was tinged with sadness, though. Adrienne Shelly wrote, directed and costars in this adorable little movie. (That's her in the glasses.) Unfortunately she isn't here to see it be well reviewed and appreciated by audiences. Her pointless murder last November was dramatic enough, and tragic enough, that it touched me, captured the attention of New Yorker's and already inspired an episode of Law & Order.

".... But then again, too few to mention"

I responded to a meme last week and one of the questions has really stayed with me:

"Name 3 minor regrets in life."

The three I listed were three of the biggest heartbreaks of my life. I don't have minor regrets. I try not to regret anything. I think it's a wasted emotion. If you make a mistake, you should try to learn from it and move on. In that way, I guess, I am like Frank. (Though I read somewhere that he really didn't like "My Way" very much.)

Isn't that an interesting thing about blogging? As you communicate with others, you end up learning about yourself.

I wish I could preserve memories in a Ball jar

My best friend was in town on Tuesday and Wednesday night. He had to attend focus groups that ran until 9:00, then entertain his clients a bit, so these were really late nights. (On Tuesday we didn't even meet until midnight.) We were both dead on our feet and the reasonable thing would have been to just agree that seeing one another this trip just wouldn't work. But we didn't.

After all, who knows how many visits like this we'll have? He really doesn't care for this job. I love him and I want to be happy, so naturally I support him 100% when it comes to finding professional fulfillment. But we both know a new job will mean no more regular business trips to Chicago. I may someday go visit him and his family in Colorado. I'm sure we'll still email and talk regularly, but it won't be the same. Soon enough there will be no more late nights, laughing and strolling up Michigan Avenue. I'm so comfortable with him. I'll miss our time together so much. The trick, of course, is to not let my worrying about the future deprive me of our fun in the moment.

"Mom!"

LOS ANGELES - Screaming and crying, Paris Hilton was escorted out of a courtroom and back to jail Friday after a judge ruled that she must serve out her entire 45-day sentence behind bars rather than in her Hollywood Hills home.

“It’s not right!” shouted the weeping Hilton, who violated her parole in a reckless driving case. “Mom!” she called out to her mother in the audience. -- MSNBC

Is it OK if I find this funny?

Paris Hilton cried a lot in her cell. Paris Hilton developed a rash in jail. Paris can't stand being incarcerated.

Aw ... She's right, this is sooooo unfair! The girls from Compton she was so comfortable making fun of on tape are far more likely to go to jail so they probably are used to the idea! But Paris is special. The idea of prison makes her sad, being there makes her cry and feel all itchy. She's right. Her mommy should get her out of this.

So proud of her

My niece graduated from 8th grade yesterday. I knew that she was enjoying much about this major event in her life: a class trip to Great America, a dance at her new high school, a party at the school she was leaving ... She's been with many of her classmates since Kindergarten (one since preschool) and developed a dedicated posse of good friends (for some reason they all wore superhero capes to their last day -- ever! -- of school). After the graduation ceremony, she and her closest friends were literally the last kids to leave because they were taking pictures of one another in their cap/gown in front of their lockers, inside their "favorite" girls' bathroom, in the stairwell, with their favorite teachers, etc.

What I didn't realize was how terribly IMPORTANT she felt this day was. She showed me her memory book (an 8th grade class project) and saw that she referred to it as "the end of my childhood" and "the beginning of a new chapter." Her writings were very poignant. She wishes she could just stay in 8th grade forever. I wish she could, too.

Each 8th grader was asked to provide a quote that accurately reflected them. I was surprised and quite tickled by her choice. She mentioned that she began to listen to Bob Dylan, but I didn't realize how into him she's become. Her quote was from "Positively Fourth Street":

"I wish that for just one time you could stand inside my shoes/And just for that one moment I could be you/Yes, I wish that for just one time, you could stand inside my shoes/You'd know what a drag it is to see you."

She is smart and witty and curious and perceptive and sensitive and I couldn't be more proud of her.

Friday Feast #2

Appetizer
What do you consider to be the ultimate snack food?
Hostess Cupcakes -- the ones with the squiggle of white frosting on top of the chocolate

Soup
On a scale of 1 to 10 (with 10 as highest), about how popular is your last name?
2. I dislike my own last name so much that I almost considered losing it a good reason to get married.

Salad
Who is your all-time favorite sitcom character, and why?
Hawkeye Pierce. Funny, glib, compassionate and talented. One of my dream guys.




Main Course
Do you shop online? If so, name some sites you like to browse for goodies.
peapod.com, amazon.com, ebay.com, overstock.com


Dessert
Fill in the blank: I think ___________ should be ___________.
Paris Hilton, jail

Thursday Thirteen #19 - Make a Baby Boomer Say "OUCH!"

Thirteen Celebrity Factoids that Make THE GAL HERSELF Really Feel Her Age Hi. I'm old. And these little news items have hammered that fact home. Now if you born in 1965 or later, you may look at these 13, yawn and say, "so what?" or "who?" But if you're a Baby Boomer, I bet you that at least one or two will make you say, "OUCH!" 1. Sally Field is a grandmother who promotes osteoporosis meds 2. Donnie Osmond is a grandfather 3. So is Ron Howard 4. Mare Winningham, the sweetheart/mascot of the “young adult drama” St. Elmo’s Fire, played Meredith’s stepmother on Grey’s Anatomy 5. JFK would have turned 90 on May 29 6. Luci Baines Johnson, whose wedding entranced me when I was a little girl, is now the grandmother of 8 7. “Gilligan, the Skipper, too, the Millionaire and his Wife” are all dead (“The Movie Star, the Professor and Mary Ann” are fine, though) 8. Jane Fonda had both hips replaced 9. Zoe Kravitz, daughter of Cosby kid Lisa Bonet, is 18 and will make her acting debut this year 10. “Charlie’s Girls,” the Manson Family hippie chicks who are doing time for the Tate-LoBianco murders, are all in their 60s 11. Mary Wilson of the Supremes had heart bypass surgery 12. The only surviving member of The Mama and the Papas, California Dreamin’ blonde surfer chick Michelle Phillips, now preserves her complexion by staying completely out of the sun 13. 17-year-old American Idol winner Jordin Sparks says she “grew up on the show.” Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

I think I'll settle for simply rich

Yes, I have loved Paul McCartney since I was 6. Once I understood what my virginity was, I dreamt of losing it to him. I know just about every song. I have read just about every word. I have seen every concert I could afford. Loving Paul has been my life avocation.

But I know our "relationship" is completely one-sided. When I say I'm going to be Lady Mac, I know that's not true. I know Paul doesn't know who I am. I am smart and cynical enough to know I never want to meet him because nobody could live up to 40+ years of foreplay. (Quick Quiz: On what golden oldie can you hear the words, "Oh no, not me. I'm not ready for that last disappointment?")

That said, I have met McCartney fans whose grasp on reality is more tenuous than mine.

One of them works here. We both picked up his new CD yesterday, and she's been in here just about every half hour to discuss another aspect of it. She flew to England expressly to attend the premiere of his classical music piece. She sent him a letter asking him to invest in her new small business venture, and was upset he never answered.

Another one spent Christmas morning IM-ing with Paul's son James. So she says. She is convinced it was really James because she kept peppering him with questions "only Paul could answer." Never mind that she doesn't know him and she could answer them.

I wonder what it's like to inspire such passion in complete strangers. It's definitely the downside of fame. I imagine it would be creepy. Paul's been famous more than half his life, so maybe he doesn't notice it anymore. But I'm not so sure he can afford to. After all,

• John Lennon was murdered by a stalker fan
• Cubs first baseman Eddie Waitkus was plugged by fan who loved him and believed he wanted to be traded to the Phillies (this story inspired The Natural)
• Rebecca Shaeffer of My Sister Sam opened her front door to be shot by a fan

When you consider the crazies, somehow "rich and famous" doesn't sound like that much fun. I think I'll settle for simply rich.

"That Was Me"

I'm listening to Paul's new CD, Memory Almost Full, and I'm impressed. (Believe it or not, I'm not always impressed. I mean, even I knew "Ebony and Ivory" was crap.)

This is only my second time through the entire thing, but so far my favorite is "That Was Me." It's a legitimate old-time rocker about a legitimate old-time rocker looking back on his life and career. While it's not a self-congratulatory song, it is a self-aware one. His voice gets more raw as he sings that he can't believe that the guy who did all that is the same guy that's (still) singing now, and I believe his "well-waddaya-know" wonder. It's one of those rare songs that manages to be both profound and ... well ... fun.

Nicely done, Sir Paul.

These results please me more than the Zombie thing

Which is not to say I won't be helpless against Zombies; I just prefer not to dwell on that.

Your Linguistic Profile:

70% General American English 15% Upper Midwestern 10% Yankee 0% Dixie 0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

I've got to be meme'd

I got this Random Sets of 3s meme from one Mr. Sparky Duck.


Random sets of 3’s:

3 things you WILL do in this lifetime:
1) Redecorate my condo and get it exactly the way I want it
2) Get thin(ner) and stay that way so I can throw out my "fat jeans"
3) Become more responsible with money

3 songs with lyrics that have made you cry:
1) At 17 by Janis Ian
2) You Don't Know Me by Ray Charles (more recently by Jann Arden)
3) I Will by the Beatles

3 TV shows you enjoy watching (old or new):
1) Law & Order ("In the criminal justice system …")
2) That Girl (Season 3 out on DVD soon)
3) Grey's Anatomy

Dreams you once upon a time had, but that haven’t come true and you’re okay with that:
1) Play the guitar
2) Learn Quark (hell, the designers are all using InDesign anyway)
3) To become Lady McCartney (though the position will be open again soon)

3 places you go/have been where you found a sense of peace:
1) Hot Springs National Park
2) Marshall Field's on State Street (Damn you, Macy's! DAMN YOU, I SAY!)
3) Tucked into the far corner of my sofa, which is the only place I ever want to be when I don't feel well

3 minor regrets in life:
1) Wasting so much time on that genuine shitheel (I've been involved with some lovely men that it didn't work out with, but this guy was a total time/life force suck)
2) Saying something really mean that I'm not even sure I believed during a break-up argument
3) Not being more successful working the phones for Senator John Kerry in 2004

3 clichés or common phrases that you tend to believe are true:
1) Wait till next year
2) Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely
3) Hindsight is 20/20

TAG TIME! I call on Gabriella Hewitt (because I don't think I've seen you tagged recently) and the dog-loving Mo and anyone who wants to join in.

If you do the meme, let me know.

Don't get too attached to me. I might not be here much longer.

32%Mingle² - ZombieQuiz



I got this quiz courtesy of Thomma Lynn

Lazy, lazy, lazy

I've just gotten done eating … alot. (Salad followed by a chicken pot pie.) Now all I want to do is crash. And I think I might do just that. What is it about rainy days that strips me of all ambition and energy?

I have a pile of magazines to go through. I have a ton of papers to sort. This living room carpet could use a nice little visit from Roomba.

But no, I'm about to recline. It's with equal parts self-indulgence and self-loathing that I am going to end my evening right here on the sofa.

A job I couldn't do

I couldn't moderate focus groups. I'm both too opinionated and too curious. OK, and I have too big a mouth.

I was watching a Road to the White House voter focus group on CSpan. Usually I find these things fascinating. Does everyone have the same priorities as I do? What's on other citizens' minds? But then I realized that in '04, I watched later in the process, when the party front runners were universally agreed upon, and the participants identified themselves members of one party or the other. This focus group consisted of Republicans, Democrats and Undecideds.

Two women -- one in her 30s and one in her 50s -- seemed to be from a different planet. If I were the moderator, I would either have stopped speaking to them, or challenged them with follow up questions. And that would mean I'd be doing a really bad job.

These two women kept talking about "morality." How the new candidates for President should reflect George W. Bush's "morality." He says what he means and means what he says. They admire his "moral" leadership. It's Bill Clinton who damaged this country and how it's viewed internationally, because of his sex life.

WHAT? HUH?

How do you judge morality? Are John McCain, Rudy Giuliani, and Fred Thompson all MORE moral than Bill Clinton because they left their marriages and he stayed in his? Is it worse to lie about oral sex or weapons of mass destruction? Is it worse to lie about oral sex or Saddam Hussein's role in 9/11? How do you "measure" that?

How come there are no photos of an underaged Chelsea Clinton sprawled atop of one of her college classmates, cig in one hand, beer in the other, the way you can find shots of Jenna Bush? Why are there no photos of Chelsea laying on top of her date and putting the ball in "Inaugural Ball?" Does this mean the Clintons are "more moral" as parents? Should these issues even matter when we vote?

And if the rest of the planet is so appalled or disgusted by Bill Clinton's personal life, how did he become the most popular politician in the world?

How do these women get to the conclusions they have reached? Why are they so sure they know exactly what the Good Lord smiles on and and what He doesn't?

I would love to know how these two voters came to be this way. Perhaps if they could articulate it, I'd move closer to being purple, rather than true blue.

But a moderator can't do that. He's supposed to simply elicit opinions. And that's a bigger job than this gal.

Dumb can be fun

I know I should be watching the news to catch up on the terrorist/JFK plot. Or whether or not our state will ever have an approved budget. Or if Carlos Zambrano has hit anyone else lately.

But I'm watching the original Ocean's 11.

It's hypnotically kitschy/campy/cool. Frank and the boys (including Mr. Roper himself, Normal Fell) are taking down glitzy old-time casinos like the Sands and the Desert Inn and the Sahara. With Brylcreamed hair, skinny ties, the ice in their glasses tinkling and cigarettes dangling from their lips, they spout "ring-a-ling dialog" and slip their room keys into the cleavage of willing, nameless women.

Interestingly, some of the best lines belong to the ladies. Watch for Shirley MacLaine and Dean Martin flirting in the parking lot when she says, "I'm so drunk, I don't think I lie down without holding on." Or Angie Dickinson telling soon-to-ex-husband Frank, "I'll consider mistress, plaything, toy for a night, but I refuse to be your mother. That's out!"

I saw the Clooney Ocean's 11 and will probably see Ocean's 13. Those movies are like a Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition for women. And I'll wonder if, in 45 years, those movies will seem as kitschy/campy/cool to another generation.