Ah, the Telethon

The act that's on now is a ventriloquist that had a big old Sir Paul puppet and he performed the duet, "The Girl Is Mine." It was delightfully wretched. You don't see stuff like this every day. I hope I get to see a plate spinner before I switch it off for the night!

Remember, keep your karma in check. If you make fun of Jerry and this corny cast of characters, you gotta contribute to MDA. It's only right.

September Fitness Challenge

Day 6. Pushed the cardio to 45 minutes! And I discovered a new machine -- the fixed lateral. It works well with my usual lateral pulls. I also did sit ups. That hurt a little bit, not in the abs but because my bum knee makes it hard to get up off the floor. Maybe tomorrow I'll devote my workout completely to cardio ...

Good News!

Even if I still felt about Michael Jackson the way I did when I insisted my birthday party start late so I could watch the premier of the "Black or White" video, it would bug the living shit out of me that The Gloved One has the rights to the Lennon/McCartney catalog. Especially now, with the launch of The Beatles: Rock Band game and the release of 14 remastered Beatles CDs. (9 of Amazon's Top 20 Bestselling CDs are by The Beatles, and they won't even be released until Tuesday!) The glory and the profits from Beatlemania Redux should go to the Beatles, especially the Lennon/McCartney families.

Nine years from now, in 2018, the songs may begin becoming the property of Paul McCartney again.* According to US copyright law, 56 years after music is originally published, songwriters can move to regain their lost rights. So "Please, Please Me" and "I Saw Her Standing There" and other songs written in 1962 can be returned to Paul. (Exactly where the songs will be returned from is still shrouded in mystery. The Jackson estate is so deeply in debt that it's not known if the songs will be used to settle with creditors.)

Paul McCartney will be 76 years old in 2018. I hope he's still here to enjoy getting his own songs back.

*John Lennon's death in 1980 complicates his situation a bit. His widow has to negotiate a separate agreement.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: The Random Dozen Meme

1. When you go to Wowmart, what one thing do you get every single time, besides a funky-wheeled squeaking cart full of frustration? 12-pack of Coke

2. What is something that people are currently “into” that you just don’t get or appreciate? Last week the Entertainment Weekly cover was devoted to a Seinfeld reunion. Yawn.

3. What is something that really hoists your sail that other people might feel “ho-hum” about? This week the Entertainment Weekly is devoted to the Beatles and discusses the 14 album reissues.

4. Favorite song to sing in the shower or car? Dancing in the Moonlight ("It's such a fine and natural sight ...)

5. A really great salad must have this ingredient: Cucumber slices

6. What advice in a nutshell would you give to new bloggers? Post often. It's more important to capture the moments of your life than to agonize over every syllable.

7. What was the alternate name that your parents almost named you? Do you wish they had chosen it instead of the one they gave you? John. I would have had to have been born a boy to get it, and I like being a girl.

8. What in your life are you waiting for? To have enough money put aside to redecorate this condo

9. You get a package in the mail. What is it, and who is it from? It's a present from my Cousin Rose. I'd have to open it to know what's inside, and I promised her I'd wait until my actual birthday (which isn't until November).

10. Today–what song represents you? My Tears Dry on Their Own by Amy Winehouse

11. What is one thing that blogging has taught you about yourself? How lucky I am. Yes, I have been known to battle the blues. But by chronicling my life I have discovered how many things lift my spirits each and every day.

12. How are you going to (or how did you) choose the clothes you’re wearing today? What do they say about you in general or specifically how you’re feeling today? My Inspi(red) Gap t-shirt was a gift from my friend Mindy back in 2007. I chose it because I hadn't worn it much this summer and soon it will be too chilly to wear it.

September Fitness Challenge

Day 5. A full 40 minutes of cardio! Split between the bike and the elliptical. Then I went on to do lats and leg curls and leg presses. I wasn't completely worn out yet and was tempted to do a little more. But I don't want to do any damage to my banged-up right leg. So I reminded myself I'd be back tomorrow and headed for the locker room.

A good day

Let myself awaken naturally, without the alarm clock.

Donated a bag of non-perishables to the food pantry -- arriving just before they closed, which is better for me.*

Had me a lovely lunch at Cosi, then went, at the spur of the moment, to the movies (Extract; just OK, but Ben Affleck is a riot).

Sent four boxes of Christmas cards to Operation Shoebox. (I want the troops to get them in time to send them back stateside to family and friend.) This is not only a do-good, it was housecleaning because every year I buy more charity Christmas cards than I can ever send and they are nearly overrunning me.

Worked out, getting in tons of cardio and strengthening my legs and my core. I feel great.

D Lee had an exquisite day at the plate.

Now I'm watching The Sound of Music. This movie is always hitsville with me.

As they say, "it's all good."


*Obviously I like helping my neighbors or I wouldn't do this, but it upsets me to see how deep the need is. By arriving just before closing, most people have already been helped and the parking lot was mostly empty.

My cats amuse me

This morning, I was putting my clean bras away in the drawer. I machine wash them in a mesh bag with a long drawstring. While performing this little task, I was (tunelessly) singing the tune to the theme to the old Green Hornet tv show. (I don't believe it had lyrics.) I was watching a Batman rerun and found myself thinking about the less successful comic-to-TV crime fighter.

Anyway, my cat Reynaldo was watching my every move with bright eyed enthusiasm. I thought to myself, "Does he wonder what I'm singing? Why I'm singing?"

Then I realized he wasn't watching me, he was planning his attack on mesh bag's drawstring.

My cats aren't confused by my more eccentric behavior because they really don't care. Cats tend to treat us with a certain noblesse oblige that comes with descending from Egyptian gods. It makes them good roommates.

September Fitness Challenge

Day 4. No excuses. At least, no legitimate ones. I not only stayed well within my calorie limit today, I took care of my major weekend chores -- laundry and grocery shopping. I checked the local health club's weekend hours and they are open until 6 Saturday and Sunday and until 3 on Monday. So my goal is to get over there three times over the next days. Wish me luck!

HEY, LAY-DEEE!

There may be celebrities that I enjoy mocking more than Jerry Lewis, but none that I have enjoyed making fun of as long. Jerry Lewis is corny, vulgar, maudlin, nasty and often just plain nuts. His massive ego and complete lack of self control make the Telethon one of my favorite TV events of the year.

The sublime ridiculousness that is Jerry Lewis' stage persona doesn't take away from the wonderful work he has done for MDA, and that MDA does to help those neuromuscular disease. Now in his 80s, after winning humanitarian awards and raising over $1 billion for MDA, he certainly doesn't have to put his snarky old self out there for the amusement of smart asses like me.

That's why I already donated $70 to MDA, before the show starts. I want to make sure I do my part to help the charity that has done so much good for so many over the years. Then I can just sit back and enjoy Jer's dopey hijinks in peace.

If you're going to watch the telethon, eager to see how many minutes into the show it takes Jerry to insult someone, I suggest you do the same.

Even if you're not going to watch it, consider making a contribution. They really do help the people who need them. Here's their website.

Genuinely befuddled

This is the 43rd President, George W. Bush. Take a look at his face in this, his commissioned White House portrait. Does he look evil to you? An enemy of the very Constitution he was elected* to defend and protect?

Most of all, does he look like a man out to indoctrinate your children and twist their impressionable minds to follow his radical right wing agenda?

After all, in 2001 he addressed children directly, asking them to send at least $1 to help children in Afghanistan. The funds were going to be distributed in conjunction with (get this!) the United Nations!

I know, I know. You're shocked. What a bastard!

Of course all of this is silly. GWB was right to appeal to children. Just as the hubbub about Obama speaking to schoolchildren is silly and Obama is right to appeal to children.

Aside from the hypocrisy of those who freak out over Obama's speech but not Bush's, there is another element of this that bothers me ...

When are the vocal minorities who protest Obama's speech going to accept it -- this man IS the President?* What is to be gained by encouraging schoolchildren NOT to listen to him? I mean, there are parents actually threatening to keep their children home rather than have them exposed to Barack Obama!

I live in a neighborhood where kids proudly wear Obama t-shirts as they skateboard around, so I find all this rather shocking and confusing. I had no idea how vitriolic this has become in other parts of the country.


*Tempted though I am to talk about FL 2000 and OH 2004, I am going to take the high road here.

In case I need a career change

Sent here by Kwizgiver.

You Should Teach Third Grade

You are good at dealing with many types of personalities at once. You are an excellent multitasker. You can teach a group well, but you're also able to help people out one on one. You see everyone as individuals, and you're able to meet them where they are. You don't judge or push. You know how to ask interesting questions and point people in the right direction.

What Grade Should You Teach?

Blogthings: Our Quizzes Weren't Written By Bored 12 Year Olds

Done!

I stayed late and plowed through and finished developing two different concepts for introducing specific 2010 tax law revisions to the public. It didn't come easily and it wasn't fun, the way my job often is. My difficulty didn't spring from the subject matter -- over my career I have written glowingly about tube socks and mud flaps. No, today the problem was that I just couldn't get into the groove.

I'm pleased with the final result, which is only right. I mean, my clients don't get a special, reduced rate for work done when I'm not into the groove. And now I get to eat dinner and enjoy what's left of my evening, knowing that my four-day Labor Day weekend won't involve working from home. Yea!

September Fitness Challenge

Day 3. Planning ahead. I am looking at my day differently now, giving more thought to what I consume and even anticipating my day ahead of time. For example, today is Beer Cart day. On a day like this,* I KNOW I will want that brewski. So I had a lighter lunch -- hard-boiled eggs, grapes, cheese and crackers. My Bud Light is guilt free, and, in fact, acting as my muse, and I'll still be able to have whatever I want for dinner without going over my 1890 calorie-allotment.

*Writer's block AND a Cub loss to the White Sox!

This is so sad

My word well has run dry. No matter how hard I pump, no words come forth! I have to write tons of copy about the 2010 IRA tax laws, and make it (if not fun, at least ...) interesting and accessible. And I am hopelessly STUCK!

I shall now check the Illinois State Lottery ticket in my wallet. If I am not suddenly a freshly-minted millionaire, then I'm afraid I can't quit this job and must finish this project. So then I'll get some lunch. Maybe having some grub will inspire me.

Therapy? Did someone say "therapy?"

I found The Therapy Survey over at Kwizgiver's.

When was the last time you cried?
Months ago, while watching Marley & Me ("You were a great dog, Marley." "Goodbye, Clearance Puppy.")

What made you angry this week?
Over lunch on Tuesday, a coworker compared and contrasted Chicago and LA by explaining that at least the homosexuals here stay in the closet. Reminded me of why I shouldn't go out to lunch with coworkers.

What was the happiest day of your life?
I've had many. The first one that comes to mind is an evening in summer 1976 at the old Chicago Stadium when I first saw Paul McCartney live.

Have you ever laughed until you cried?
Yes

Have you ever laughed so hard you peed your pants?
No

Have you ever been suspicious of someone?
Yes

What was the last thing you envied?
How nice this woman on the street looked in her belted sweater.

Are you sarcastic?
Who, me?

Have you ever had your heart broken?
Oh, yes.

What is the last thing that disgusted you?
A scene in a Wednesday rerun of NCIS: a murderer cut out her victim's eyes

Have you ever been truly afraid because of a scary movie?
Yes. Dressed to Kill.

What is you biggest regret?
Not flossing when I was younger.

Have you ever had an obsession?
Other than the Cubs? (They play the White Sox today.)

Do you feel pity others who have less than you?
Yes

What is your biggest fear?
Suffering through a firey plane crash

What was the last lie you told?
I can't recall. Not that I'm ubertruthful. I just can't remember the last lie I told.

Have you ever cheated in a game among friends?
Not as an adult

Who was the last person you flirted with?
I don't even remember. Isn't that sad?

Have you ever seen an image that made you physically ill?
No. Several have come close, but none has succeeded.

September Fitness Challenge

Day 2. 35 minutes of cardio followed by leg presses and leg curls. It'll be close, I admit, but I just might stay within my calorie intake goal today, too!

I Saw Her Standing There

OK, she wasn't standing. She was walking toward me up the street, but too involved with her cell phone conversation to recognize me. She's a former coworker of mine, one I haven't seen in more than 10 years. She'd be in her middle 50s now.

She was reed thin, in denim from head to toe (including her bedazzled jeans). Her long, straight hair was very thin (was that scalp peering through?) and she had circles around her eyes.

Is it evil, or conceited, to say plainly right here that I am glad I look better than she does? Please say it's OK. It doesn't happen often.

"I Want" Wednesday

This week's question is:

What meal do you want at this very instant?

I just had lunch, so I'm not hungry. But I am craving something cinnamon-y. And warm. Comfort food. So let's say a gi-normous bowl of oatmeal with warm cinnamon apple slices. Since it's my fantasy, I'll sprinkle EXTRA cinnamon on top, too! Just to make sure I have more sugar coursing through my system than anyone needs, I'll take a Coke with that.

To play along, click here.

September Fitness Challenge

Day 1. I'd like to be able to say that I started this month on the treadmill but alas, I'd be lying. We took our consultant, Maggie, out to lunch to wish her a fond farewell, so I couldn't work out during the day and I didn't get home until late. BUT I did do something to aimed at keeping me healthy. Because I had such a yummy, albeit calorie-laden, lunch, I opted to have a nutritious dinner. Apples and cinnamon oatmeal. Just 250 calories and 24 grams of fiber. It tasted all the better because it made me feel so virtuous!

I must learn to be more patient

One of my coworkers is, quite possibly, the nicest man in the world. Kind and sincere. He also stutters and is hard of hearing. I hate myself for becoming impatient with him when he doesn't get something or I find myself repeating myself. I hope he doesn't sense my frustration. After all, I should only be as nice as he is!

The Queen's Meme

Bloggingham Love Shack (aka The Romance Meme)

1. What is the craziest thing you've ever done in the name of love? I actually almost quit my job and left my family and friends to move to Fremont, California, with the most toxic man to ever draw breath. No, really, he is. You may think you've dated some repulsivos, but trust me, I wasted a decade with the real title holder.

2. How much mystery should there be in a relationship? Is it a good thing or not? I should be enveloped in mystery, and yet be able to know every damn thing I want about the man in my life.

3. Is there someone in the blogosphere you'd like to get to know more intimately? Have you been too shy to ask? Let me help you. Write a 3 sentence anonymous blove letter to them in this meme.
Leave a link if you dare. (I promise not to tell!)

Dear John Mayer, I love how sensitive you are on "Waiting for the World to Change" and "Daughters." I love how vulgar and silly you are on Twitter. I want to eat cereal in bed with you.www.johnmayer.com

4. Describe a "perfect evening" with the one you love. Watching a movie at home, sitting on the floor, drinking beer and eating pizza. Then lots of sex, please.

5. If you are in a relationship, describe the one thing that makes it work well for you. If you are not in a relationship, do you want to be? If so, what type of romance are you looking for? What would it look like in your life? To borrow from The Boss, I long for someone who will "guard my dreams and visions." Then lots of sex, please.

6. If you had to choose between having good s*x (I told you not to let your mother read this) OR intelligent conversation on a regular basis, which would you choose and why? Why? Why must I choose? Oh, my Queen, you are a cruel despot!

7. I've got the Bloggingham Blues. What type of man is right for Queen Mimi Pencil Skirt? Do any of you see love in her foreseeable future? What do you suggest I do to spice up my love life? What am I doing wrong????!
I object to the basic premise, for I don't believe you are doing anything "wrong." So much of love is timing. A coworker and I were discussing Gone with the Wind (and, yes, come to think of it, Rhett Butler would be great for you). We both read it for the first time in high school and loved it. But if we read it for the first time now, would we love it as much? The book remains the same but we evolve. So you just haven't found the right man for this time of your life yet. And why would any woman ask ME for advice on love? Are Liz Taylor and Jessica Simpson both busy?

09 August Happiness Challenge -- Day 31

Monday. Beautiful sky, perfect weather. The sky is blue and clear, except for a few puffy white clouds. The sun is bright and the mercury just grazed 70º. Simply gorgeous.

Now it's time to bid that Get Happy Girl, Judy Garland, "adieu" because, just like Christmas decorations, she's going to be tucked away until next year.

That felt gooooood

Worked out today for the first time in a week! Did my half hour of cardio plus some lat pull downs. My bruises didn't protest too much, which is good because my muscles have missed the exertion.

I'm feeling enthusiastic about all of this again because when I stood on the scale this morning, I found that at least I hadn't gained any weight.

09 August Happiness Challenge -- Day 30

Sunday. Well-timed words of encouragement. Not only did my cyber sibs, Kwiz and Snarky, cheer me up with their comments on the post below, my neighbor Brian stopped the laundry room to talk to me about working out, too. It would be so easy for me to throw in the towel and go to Stone Cold Creamery, but that's not what I really want to do. Thanks to my personal cheerleaders for keeping me on track.

Uh oh

Tomorrow is Weigh Day. I fear the results will not be what I want them to be. I have missed work outs due to work (bad excuse, because my health club is open 24/7) and tummy trouble and my bruises (valid excuses). I've also fallen off the diet wagon a time or two.

I must remind myself that this is not a diet I am on. It's a lifestyle change. So August wasn't all that successful. I can turn it around in September.

Besides, I know I'm stronger, if not thinner. That's an indication that I'm on way to a healthier life. And that is the point, isn't it? (Let me rephrase: that SHOULD be the point, shouldn't it?)

09 August Happiness Challenge -- Day 29

Saturday. Looking at him. Watching my cat Joey sleep always makes me smile. He does it so completely! He sprawls out, changes his position frequently, and looks like he's smiling as he dreams. My big old tub of guts is a "power napper extraordinaire."

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: The Waiting

1. Have you ever stayed online for a very long time waiting for someone? Not particularly. I will stay online and refresh my mailbox often if I'm expecting an email from a friend, but I'll be doing other things -- not just sitting there, scaring at the screen.

2. How do you eat oreos? I don't eat Oreos, but I do have a weakness for the lemon creme sandwich cookies my admin regularly brings into the office. I devour them in a bite or two, without taking them apart and eating the creme separately.

3. Are you cocky? Professionally, yes. Personally? No.

4. Did you have an imaginary friend as a kid? Hell yes! I had an entire imaginary cast of characters. It was great.

5. What t.v. station do you watch the most? MSNBC

6. Have you ever seen the ocean? Both the Atlantic and the Pacific and the Gulf, too.

7. Have you ever been hospitalized? Only once for the removal of uterine fibroids. Not really a big deal.

8. What's your favorite brand of rootbeer? IBC (though it's getting harder to find)

9. Could you live without a computer? Not happily

Faith and Redemption

I'm watching Ted Kennedy's funeral mass and my heart is so full. Not just in celebration of this one life or this one family, but because I know how fortunate I am to believe.

• I know that public service, politics and government are all noble callings. I know the Kennedys, Bill Clinton and Barack Obama (all of who I'm looking at on my TV right now) chose to better the country, even though they all could have found easier, more lucrative work in the private sector. Yes, I realize that no public servant is perfect and at times believing as I do leaves my heart feeling as bruised as my knee. But it also gives me so much hope and purpose.

• I know that we can change our own lives. I know I can become a better person, a better daughter, a better friend. I have that capacity. As I listen to everyone discussing how Ted Kennedy's love for his second wife Vicki helped him get his life back on track, I know that's possible. It's never too late, it's never over, we're never done ... not until God calls us home.

• I know that true love and soulmates exist. He was well into middle age when they wed. (See bullet above.) Just because I have fallen short in romantic relationships until now doesn't mean it will always be this way. (See bullet above.)

• I know that Jesus loves me and I will be forgiven. Service to man, love and redemption are all part and parcel of God's glory. Within my Unitarian faith I have the framework and reinforcement to worship as I wish, and I am so grateful.

I am a very lucky woman with a full heart. As Ted Kennedy said, "...the work goes on, the cause endures, the hope still lives, and the dream shall never die."

09 August Happiness Challenge -- Day 28

Friday. Peapod. Because I'm still pretty sore (as explained in yesterday's challenge post), I really can't/shouldn't do a lot of heavy lifting. So thank goodness for grocery delivery services! All my heavy stuff -- Slim Fast, Coca Cola and a jug of Tidy Cat -- will arrive at my front door this evening. Hurray!

It could be worse

Friends of this blog, the Bumbles, commented recently that, living in Boston, the Kennedy coverage is pretty much wall to wall.

Imagine what it's like to live here, in Chicagoland, and have THIS be the center of the press coverage! Doesn't quite reach the mythical majesty of Camelot, does it?

Friday Fill In

1. He was a gentleman and a scholar.

2. The cool night air, so I can sleep with the window open, is what I look forward to most this time of year.

3. My best friend is related to John and JQ Adams -- isn't that neat?

4. I can't say I miss Michael Jackson one bit, to be honest with you.

5. Appearances can be deceiving -- trite, but true.

6. The last person I gave a hug to was my nephew, who is imminently huggable.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to vegging, tomorrow my plans include vegging and Sunday, I want to veg!

To fill it in for yourself, click here.

Aw ...

Sir Paul and his gal pal, Nancy Shevell, enjoying a Yankee game. This makes me happy.

He can't possibly understand

This is Splash, the oldest of Ted Kennedy's three dogs and rumored to be his favorite. He's shown here in Kennedy's Senate office, sitting beneath a photo of JFK. But the great thing about dogs is that Splash doesn't know about the Kennedy Legacy and wouldn't care if he did. He was just sitting there with the light of his life, his favorite person, the one who gave him treats, scratched his ear, gave him rides in the car and took him sailing. In return, Splash gave his #1 person comfort and unconditional love. Not because Ted Kennedy was one of the most famous men in the world, but because that's what dogs do.

If you visit here often, you know I feel a special bond with dogs and cats. It's such a part of my heart that can't help looking at Ted's death through that prism. Splash can't possibly understand what has happened in his furry world. I wonder how long dogs mourn.

And then there was one

With the recent passing of Eunice Kennedy Shriver just two weeks ago and now, of course, Ted Kennedy, there is only sibling of their generation left -- Jean Kennedy Smith (second from left). I wonder what it is like for her these days.

She was there for the rivalry between Joe and Jack ... Honey Fitz ... sailing and swimming and football in Hyannis Port and Palm Springs ... their father's days in Hollywood ... the Roosevelts ... London during the war ... the glamorous but tragic marriage of Kick and Billy ... the heartbreak of Rosemary's illness ... Choate and Harvard ... PT-109 ... the sudden deaths of Joe and Kick ... the political ascendancy of Jack .... the addition of Ethel, Jackie and Joan ... the addition of Sarge, Steve and Peter ... Camelot ... their father's stroke ... the Cuban Missile Crisis ... the Special Olympics ... Dallas, Los Angeles and Chappaquiddick ... Bobby finding his voice and losing his life ... the trials of the "kids" (many of whom are in their 50s now), including drugs, cancer, brushes with the law and more tragic young deaths ... their mother's 100th birthday and her passing ... Teddy's growth into elder statesman ... her own time as Ambassador to Ireland ...

My mother and her brother are both seniors now and neither is in great health. My mother is stronger than she was six months ago, but she has COPD and a bad knee and tires easily. My uncle, her baby brother, is battling Parkinson's. I have watched their bond strengthen as their parents, aunts, uncles, spouses and lifelong family friends have passed.

In a very real, very human way, the Kennedys are simply a family. A family that has cast an enormous shadow across American life, to be sure, but a family, and Jean is the last one standing. Now, at 81, she has lost two of her siblings in the same month. Being the last of her parents' children must be bittersweet indeed for now she alone has all the memories.

My gratitude is with Ted Kennedy. My prayers are with her.

09 August Happiness Challenge -- Day 27

Thursday. Nice men. It was a strange day in Loop today, what with the police shooting & killing a man with a knife at noontime on State Street. But that doesn't mean Chicago isn't a terrific city. I bought a new microwave at Sears today. The box is bigger than I thought it'd be and I had a hard time getting into the cab. The cabbie helped me get it in and out of the trunk. Then, as I headed toward the door of the train station, I took a tumble on the wet pavement. Bruises on my knees, cuts on my arms. Embarrassing and painful. The cabbie left his car and helped me get back on my feet. So did a very nice man. Then, while I was on the train, a (rather cute) guy asked me if he could help me on the steps, since box looked so heavy. He did much more than that. Turns out he and I got off at the same stop and he carried it for me practically to my front door. Thank you, three men I've never seen before!