I didn't even know I cared about Simon Cowell!

Apparently something is missing in my life and no one understands me but Simon Cowell. At least that's as far as I got with dream interpretation.

So here's the dream I had last night: I am on my own, traveling through Florida. I am not going to visit my friends in the Keys -- they are nowhere to be found in this dream. The area I'm visiting is pretty deserted and very muddy. I think I hurricane has just blown through.

I go into a bar and that's where I meet Simon Cowell. He jokes that he not really the bartender, he still has the gig on American Idol, he is just watching the place for his friends.

He mixes me a very strong Cosmo and I discover that he is married to Carol Ann, the much older sister of a girl I went to high school with. Carol Ann must be 60 now and I haven't seen nor thought of her in decades, but never mind.

The bar is very empty so Simon and I have ample time to chat. He really is very nice but not at all upset that this surprises me. He gets this all time.

I finish my drink and tell him I must be on my way. He warns me to be careful as I slog through all that mud. The drink was on him.

That's it.

According to dreammoods.com:

• Walking through mud symbolizes "feeling weighed down by a situation, problem, or relationship."

• Dreaming that I am in a bar means I am seeking "escape from the stresses of everyday life," or that I am "seeking acceptance in some aspect of daily life."

• That the streets are deserted, or empty, means that "something is missing" in my life.

Or maybe all this dream means is the capers I had with lunch didn't agree with me.

Ooooh, look! It's my favorite geeky TV boyfriend!

Dan Abrams is substituting for Joe Scarborough on MSNBC's Scarborough Country the week. I love him.

I began watching when he was MSNBC's legal correspondent and host of The Abrams Report. We followed the Michael Jackson and Scott Petersen trials together. I loved how informed and opinionated he was. He was always polite, but he never pretended to be an objective telejournalist. He has a Columbia law degree and has written for the Yale Law Review and is an articulate commentator.

I imagine he was just as passionate and pro-active behind the scenes because one day he went from host of The Abrams Report to MSNBC General Manager. His promotion meant the end of his show.

I'm happy his career took off, but I've missed him. And his cool ties and his kinda watery eyes.

But I really, REALLY want one!

I had one Coke before I left for work and another Coke with my salmon salad sandwich. That's it. It's now a little after 4:00 and I have no energy whatsoever.

It seems I have only two choices:

• Curl up in a ball and nap

• Race to the pop machine for a cold, delicious, caffeine-stoked Classic Coke

I am resisting both very strong impulses and am instead opting for ice water.

I am not enjoying this. I thought virtue was its own reward. How come drinking water makes me feel like I'm being punished, not rewarded?

Crosstown Classic: Game Three

It's OK, Sweet Lou. We had fun. And, to make you feel better, I will borrow from Miss Paula Abdul:

"Hey, baby, I want you to remember: I'm forever your girl." Or, in this case, gal.

In praise of alone time

Tomorrow I don't want to talk to anyone. I want my alone time. It's my time to recharge, refresh, and get ready for the new week.

I love my alone time. I am greedy and possessive of it.

The coworker who has been having all the marital problems is getting a divorce (but since she and her husband are still living together, I'll believe it when I see it) and wants to spend time with me. During work. After work. On the weekends.

I don't want to spend time with her. But I'm stymied when she asks what I'm doing instead. It sounds so anti-social to say, "I'm not doing anything. I just want my alone time."

I want to read. I want to watch TV (especially Crosstown Classic: Game 3). I want to nap on the sofa (which always feels a little decadent to me). Maybe I want to sort my books and clothes. I want to be on my own.

I love my alone time. I need my alone time. It clears my head and keeps me strong.

Crosstown Classic: Game Two

Look at that form. A thing of beauty is a joy forever, isn't it? Especially when D. Lee comes in to pinch hit … with the bases loaded … and slams it out of the park.

Gloating would be crass and cruel and, well, so South Side. So instead, I shall just sing:

"Hey, hey, holy mackerel, no doubt about it, the Cubs are on their way
The Cubs are gonna hit today, they're pitch today, they're gonna field today
Come what may, the the Cubs are gonna WIN today!


Hey, hey, holy mackerel, no doubt about it, the Cubs are on their way
They've got the hustle, they've got the muscle
The Chicago Cubs are on their way!"

Crosstown Classic: Game One

Ah, look at the love between Lou and Ozzie!

I shan't gloat about the outcome of this first game because we Cub fans are so much more highly evolved than our South Side contemporaries.

If only I knew then ...

Just got done watching the end of Disney's The Kid (2000). In this movie, Bruce Willis spends his 40th birthday with his 8 year old self. (It has something to do with a full moon and … oh, hell, how he and his 8 year old self can be in the same place at the same time isn't really important just now.)

The sweetest thing about this movie is watching the adult hug, advise and comfort the child. School bullies, a distant father, a 3-legged dog and a tragedy that shattered the boy also left the man with an annoying tic and some less visible emotional scars. By going through it all again, but this time with the support of an adult who not only knows exactly how it feels, but who also knows this agony will pass, helps heal their future.

So naturally it got me wondering: how would I help myself? What would Today's Adult Gal tell Yesterday's Little Girl? What would we talk about if I got into the Wayback Machine and met up with my younger self, in the mid 1960s?

Your dad makes everyone unhappy because he's so unhappy himself. It's not you! He's not just mad at you, he's mad at every single thing in his whole life. Unfortunately it's only going to get worse between the two of you. But don't avoid him -- watch him. He's teaching you what not to be as an adult. He judges himself by how much money, how much stuff he has, instead of measuring his self-worth by the people in his life.

Your uncle will come home. He's in the jungles of Viet Nam and watching the news scares you. You're afraid he will be shot or burned, but he won't be. When he finally comes home, he will give you a little teal bracelet that he bought when he was on leave in Saigon. You're gonna love that bracelet and will hang on to it for decades to come.

Treasure every moment with Grandpa. He loves you very much and has so much to teach you. Yes, he can seem a little corny at times. But when you look back on your time with him -- which will be all-too brief -- that old-fashioned silliness is one of the things you will remember and love the most. And his voice and how he smells of cigars when he hugs you.


Don't worry so much about Tommy! He won't get out again! It just happened that once and you caught him before he even got to the gate. Please relax about your big white tomcat. Yes, you love him more than anything, but Mom knows how to take care of him and he's going to live a very long, very happy life.

Your older sister is a bitch, always will be. It's too bad that you two will never be close. But that's OK. You know that curly-haired girl who just moved in across the alley? She's going to end up being your friend for life, and more of a sister to you than your sister ever could be.

Don't pin your hopes on the 1969 World Series! I can't bear to tell you what's going to happen because it's going to break your heart.

Another meme about ME!

Welll... Mo wants to know more about me, so she tagged me with this "About Me" Meme;

What were you doing 10 years ago?

In 1997 I was having something of a mid-life crisis. I was much worse about the prospect of turning 40 than I am now about 50 and took up with a much younger guy. 12 years younger. I couldn't believe he was interested in me, but he was, and it was fun. My friends were aghast because I knew there was no future in it, at least by conventional standards. I knew I was never going to marry him, have babies and live in a vine-covered cottage. But it was terrific for my ego and while I wasn't "in love" with him we were good friends as well as bed partners. And he custom built my bookcases for me! So in all it was good experience and I remember him fondly. I hope he can say the same about me.

What were you doing 1 year ago?

A year ago I was not at all happy with this job and I missed my best friend terribly. He had just been laid off and was moving his family back to Colorado, so I thought I'd never see him again. Funny how things work out, though. This agency got me a new boss and he's made all the difference in terms of my attitude toward work. And my best friend and I both have put a lot of effort into being in touch and staying in touch across the miles. So I guess this story ends with all of us living happily ever after!

Five snacks you enjoy:

~ Those crappy Hostess chocolate cupcakes with the white swirl of frosting on top
~ Sno-Caps, but only at the movies
~ Bowl of cold cereal (Post Great Grains, either with milk or from the box)
~ Fritos, the originals only
~ Peanuts

Five songs that you know all the lyrics:

~ "Hey, Hey, Holy Mackarel, No Doubt about It!" This radio theme song opened every WGN Cubs broadcast when I was a girl
~ "American Pie" The long version
~ "I Will" My favorite Paul McCartney song; it's on the White Album
~ "Julie, Do Ya Love Me?" by Bobby Sherman, the 1970s answer to Sanjaya
~ "The National Anthem" even though I don't sing it -- even at ballgames -- and only move my lips

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:


Some of these are much like Ms. Mo's

~ Pay off my condo
~ Get all those home improvements done!
~ Eliminate my debts
~ Give my mother the world's most valuable Albertson's Gift Card so she will never again have to watch her pennies at the grocery store
~ New underwear all the time! Whenever there's even the slightest sign of stain or wear, into the trash those panties would go!
~ Sponsor more "foster" pets, like the ones I have at North Shore Animal League and Harmony House for Cats

Five bad habits:

~ Laziness
~ No discipline when it comes to domestic chores
~ Being too bossy/demanding at work
~ Blurting (I really must think before I speak)
~ Fixating, obsessing, awfulizing, etc.


Five things you like doing:

~ Reading
~ Watching the Cubs
~ Going to the movies
~ Gabbing on the phone/emailing/staying in touch
~ Soaking in the tub

Five things you would never wear again:

~ Three shades of blue eyeshadow all at once (lid, crease, brow)
~ Anything in a neon green
~ Long sweater and leggings (a la Pat Benatar)
~ Enormous hoop earrings
~ Bowling shirts

Five favorite toys:

~ Facial masks (clay, pore reducing, exfoliating, etc.)
~ iPod
~ Purses and more purses
~ My Shout! Color Catcher laundry sheets (yes, I am that geeky; I always check to see if it's "caught" any loose-floating dye)
~ Pogo games


And Now for the important stuff...

INSTRUCTIONS:
Remove the blog in the top spot from the following list and bump everyone up one place. Then add your blog to the bottom slot, like so:

- Pieces of Me
- The blog. Yep, the blog
- Dog's Eye View
- Inside Mo's Mind
- One Gal's Musings

I HAVE CHANGED MY MIND! It occurs to me that some of these memes are getting very chick-centric, so I hereby tag NICHOLAS and SPARKY DUCK!

Another word about tipping

I don't usually delete comments on my blog because most people make positive contributions to the discourse. One of the comments on my TT could be interpreted as insensitive to those who work in the service industry, so it's gone.

It's important to remember that most folks who work in the service industry pay income tax based on receiving tips. So if a customer is cheap or mean or ignorant and refuses to tip for good service, the worker is actually losing money.

Let's take a good look at who these people are. (This information is from the 2000 Census, so it's more than 5 years old.)

90% of hairstylists and cosmetologists (mani/pedi) are female, avg. salary $16,172

74% of restaurant, lounge and coffee shop servers are female, avg. salary $14,612

87% of maids and housekeeping staff are female, avg. salary $13,832

These people -- many of whom are working mothers -- are struggling to make ends meet. They do honest and very hard work. The way our system is set up, they depend on your tips.

If tipping offends you, your issue is with the custom and not with the person delivering the service. I agree that tipping can be confusing (hence my TT) and a pain in the ass. It would be nice if managers/owners in the hospitality industry paid their workers more in salary, or perhaps if their unions were stronger advocates, so tips wouldn't be vital.

Naturally, anyone who receives bad service (and of course it happens) shouldn't tip. But don't just dismiss/demean tipping. It's essential to those who work to serve us.

Of course we all have a right to our opinions. But since this is One Gal's Musings and I am The Gal Herself, I get the last word.

Thursday Thirteen #17 -- Tips on Tipping

Thirteen tips THE GAL HERSELFrefers to for tipping etiquette If I’m not in a restaurant or a cab, I’m confused. About tipping that is. I like to think everyone finds this as confounding as I do, so here are 13 tips about tipping. 1. At restaurants, tip 15% for good, solid service. Tip 20% for excellent service and 10% for sub-par service. Why tip for sub-par service at all? Restaurant servers pay taxes on 8% to 10% of their total receipts, not the actual amount of tips they earn. If you don't tip them, they are actually losing money because they are paying taxes based on the amount of your meal. So save the “no tip treatment” for a server who puts his thumb in your food or something equally egregious. 2. Buffet servers. $1 to $2 per person. $1 if all the server does is explain about the buffet and then bring you the bill, $2 is they deliver more service. 2. Bartenders. $1 to $2 per drink. 3. Hairdresser/barber. 15% for the haircut, 20% for chemical services. Remember to tip separately for the shampoo, usually $1. 4. Spa services (facial, massage, mani/pedi). 15% 5. Bellhops. $1 per bag (tip $2 if you have just one bag). 6. Concierge. $2 to $5 for dinner or tour reservations; up to $20 for impossible-to-get tickets. (This is one I always forget.) 7. Hotel maid service. $1 per person per night. If you’re staying more than one night, leave the tip each morning because the staff may change day-to-day. 8. Room service. 15% to 20%, unless it’s automatically added to the bill. 9. Doorman. $1 for hailing a cab (another one I forget) 10. Handyman. Tip is more optional than customary; 15% of the bill is fine if you are very pleased with the service. 11. Grocery delivery. $1 or $2 per bag. 12. Flower delivery. $2 to $5 13. Coffee servers. Tipping is more optional than customary; it’s perfectly acceptable to just leave your change in the tip jar. Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. Dewey 2. Thomma Lyn 3. Mamma Kelly 4. terra 5. shannon 6. Amy 7. Christine 8. Laughing Muse 9. Journeywoman 10. L-Squared 11. Wylie 12. Nicholas 13. tinkerbell 14. Lisa 15. Mo 16. Sparky Duck 17. Lori 18. Kendra 19. Barbara I've learned how to do links! Let's hear it for The (none-too-tech-savvy) Gal!

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

I don't have to forgive and forget

Gee, with Jerry Falwell dead and gone, who is going to tell me I'm wrong for believing in the separation of Church and State? Who is going to blame me for 9/11?

I believe in God and I accept Jesus as my Savior. I also whole-heartedly believe in America, and am proud of our heritage of religious freedom -- including the freedom to worship no gods at all. Jerry Falwell exploited his narrow view of Christianity for political gain, blurring the lines of Church and State and turning extremely personal issues literally into Federal cases.

No greater example of his cynical view of faith and government is his statement after 9/11. On September 13, 2001, he looked into a TV camera and said the following:

"I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People For the American Way, all of them who have tried to secularize America. I point the finger in their face and say 'you helped this happen.'"

Way to heal us, Rev.!

I am a feminist and a dues-paying member of the ACLU. I also worked in one of Chicago's highest-profile office buildings on 9/11 and was escorted out by Daley cops. I'd never ducked under yellow police tape before. I am not completely over that day. I probably never will be. Watching those towers come down left a mark on my soul as indelible as the vaccination mark on my arm. How dare he?

What kind of man thinks of political posturing and power at a time like that?

I know he apologized the next day, but I don't believe it was sincere. I don't have to. I don't have to forgive him, either.

Fortunately for Rev. Falwell, the Lord I believe in loves all His children unconditionally. (Even feminists and gays!) So going by this Gal's view of the world and the afterlife, Jer is forgiven and right with the Lord. He will just never be right with this Gal.

Why do men find it irresistable?

Teasing me, I mean.

Two of my male coworkers share an office. This afternoon, every time I tried to make my point to Steve, Chuck cut in with lame kid-brother comments like, "No, you can't," or "That will never work," or "That's crazy," etc. It wasn't funny but it sure was annoying. I felt like Marcia Brady trying to make a point to Greg with Peter butting in.

Steve does it, too. So does our production manager. My boss starts most mornings with the same joke about my Type A tendencies, "I know you're here because I can hear the gnashing of teeth."

The other women here don't get this sort of attention/treatment. I suspect it's meant affectionately, so it's not that it bothers me. It just confuses me. Why am I different from the other girls? Why am I so much fun to needle?

ABC Meme

I've been tagged! Jenny McB has called on me to answer this ABC All About Me.

A- Attached or Single? Single

B- Best Friend- His initials are SSP and he sees me as I am and likes me anyway

C- Cake or Pie- Pie. Specifically strawberry rhubarb pie.

D- Drink of choice- In public: Margarita on the rocks with salt; In private: Arbor Mist Strawberry Zinfandel (Please don't tell!)

E- Essential Items- iPod, hairbrush and a book

F- Favorite color- Blue

G- Gummi Bears or Worms- Really? I have to choose one? OK, bears.

H- Hometown- Brookfield

I- Indulgence- Bad TV

J- January or February?- January, because it's a fresh start and everything seems possible

K- Kids- None

L- Life is incomplete without- Critters! I can't imagine living in a home without pets!

M- Marriage Date- I'm just a barren spinster

N- Number of Siblings- Two sisters; one 16 months older, one 8 years younger

O- Oranges or Apples?- Apples, but I prefer orange juice to apple juice

P- Phobias/Fears- Flying. Hate it, hate it, hate it.

Q- Favorite Quote- If we cannot end our differences, at least we can help make the world safe for diversity. JFK

R- Reason to Smile- Hearing a Beatle song

S- Seasons - Fall

T- Tags- Starbucks Junkie. If you are still out there, Hick, copy this into your blog and answer these questions for yourself.

U- Unknown fact about me - When I was in second grade I had a poster of Paul McCartney on the back of my bedroom door. I kissed it so many times I wore the lips away.

V- Vegetarian or oppressor of animals? Oppressor, I guess. But this is very unfair. I consider about what I eat and am concerned with the quality of an animal's life.

W- Worst Habit- I can be terribly impatient.

X-X-rays or ultrasounds - I trust my doctors. Whatever they recommend.

Y- Your Favorite Food - Manicotti

Z- Zodiac - I'm on the cusp. Scorpio or Sagittarius, depending on which horoscope book I'm looking at.

I am SO still a Cub fan!

I know all the words to "Hey, Hey, Holy Mackarel, No Doubt About It." What more proof does anyone need?

One of my coworkers is a White Sox fan. Usually I treat these sad characters with the noblesse oblige they deserve. But today he really got under my skin.

He wanted to talk about last night's disappointment, when the winning run was walked in by poor relief pitcher Michael Wurtz. I confessed that I didn't watch the entire game because I switched over to watch my beloved future Hall of Famer Greg Maddux turn in a truly inspirational and heroic performance on the mound.

"You turned the game off? Then you aren't a Cub fan. You're a Greg Maddux fan."

Well, I'm both. My loyalties aren't even remotely tried this go-round because Greg Maddux certainly didn't ask to leave me … I mean, CHICAGO … last August at the trade deadline.

Also, it's still early. Experience has shown me time and time again that it's a very long season and we can't assume that the way we play in May will have any impact on where we end up in the Fall.

And the Cubs are my guys whether they win or lose. The outcome of one particular game has no bearing on my relationship with my team. We're in it together for the long haul. Whereas this could very well be (gulp) Greg Maddux' last year.

So I'm melding my Cub fandom and Maddux fanaticism with this photo. It's my beloved #31 doffing his cap and saying farewell to Wrigley Field last summer. (Is it any coincidence that the immortal Fergie Jenkins wore #31, too? I think not.)

Maddux halts Reds in complete game

Veteran right-hander perfect through five, wins No. 336
By Sandy Burgin / Special to MLB.com

SAN DIEGO -- Greg Maddux, who has never thrown a no-hitter, had a perfect game through five innings Monday night.

Javier Valentin doubled to right-center in the top of the sixth spoiling the no-no, but Maddux and the Padres went on to beat the Cincinnati Reds, 7-1, at PETCO Park.

The win was the 336th for Maddux, who allowed five hits in posting his 109th complete game, his first since Sept. 27, 2005.

Maddux (3-2) also helped his own cause at the plate with three straight sacrifice bunts, tying a franchise record.

Maddux threw 46 pitches in retiring the first 15 Reds. He got Alex Gonzalez on a groundout to start the sixth. But Valentin ripped a double to the scoreboard in right-center for the Reds' first hit. Pinch-hitter Jeff Keppinger followed with a single. However, Maddux came back and got Ryan Freel to hit into a 6-4-3 inning-ending double play.

Maddux lost a chance for his 36th shutout in the ninth. Juan Castro led off with a single and moved to third on a double by Freel. One out later, Ken Griffey Jr. hit a deep fly to center for a sacrifice fly as Castro came home. Maddux threw 96 pitches, 20 in the ninth inning. He finished the game striking out Brandon Phillips for his 3,200th career strikeout.

We're still friends, we're still us

My best friend hasn't spent any time communicating with me lately. Not by phone, not by email. It was making me very uncomfortable.

Usually we at least trade emails a couple times a day. Two weeks ago he was in town and we had dinner together two nights in a row. That spoiled me, I guess. I was getting used to seeing him regularly, and for hours at a time, once again.

Then he took his family on a much-needed vacation to New Orleans for Jazz Fest and to visit relatives. And then he had a whirlwind business trip to New York. And last weekend was Mother's Day and naturally he had family obligations.

His silence was completely understandable. But I hated it. I missed him. Here's the thing about him -- like this blog, he just absorbs what I have to say and accepts me as I am. But from this blog I am anonymous. I can confess my inkiest-black thoughts to him and he still accepts. And comforts. And supports. When I don't hear from him, my world starts to make less sense.

Because he's him, I was able to tell him how much I missed him without feeling silly or needy or vulnerable.

I know he gets a lot from me, too. I know this relationship is a two-way street. But for the last week or so, I'd been the needy one. He was attentive and sweet via emails and over the phone as he came in from the cold.

So we're still friends and we're still us and I'm so glad. Now I can relax and concentrate on my beloved future Hall of Famer Greg Maddux taking the mound against the Reds.

Facts about this here little ol' blog

Thanks to statcounter.com, I know some fascinating things about my musings. At least fascinating to me, because I am a geek.

While it may seem that I spend an inordinate amount of time blogging about Greg Maddux and the Cubs, those two subjects are not the ones that bring readers to me. At least not through search engines. Nor are searchers drawn to my musings for my sharp wit or my perceptive take on life in these here United States. No. The subject that has brought me the most msn and Google search hits is …

The discontinuation of Victoria Principal Time Release Moisture

This completely cracks me up.

76 visitors have spent more than an hour on my site. Gotta tell you, I don't even find me that interesting. I suspect that either their screens froze or they went off to make dinner without exiting my page.

Just to prove that it is indeed a worldwide web: I have had one visitor each from Croatia, Kuwait, Peru, Chile, Costa Rica and Ecuador.

My brunch with Mom

Took my mother to the Mother's Day champagne buffet in my hometown. We had a lovely time … two trips to the buffet each, plus dessert. Since my mom can't drink anymore, I got both mimosas. They took some of the discomfort out of being back in my hometown. (It is, after all, the place I fled.)

My mother is a very happy woman, very content with her life. She's "lunch mom" four days a week at the local grade school, but with summer looming she's fixating on her yard. She is very serious about her garden and proudly showed off all the plants my younger sister's family got her for Mother's Day yesterday. She loves the Chicago Bulls and is stoic through their playoff bid this year. She dotes on her cats. She was effusive about a new shampoo she bough from Home Shopping.

I don't want to copy my mother, because her life seems very small to me. But I do wish to emulate her in terms of how peaceful she is with her life and her choices. She epitomizes that saying about, "It's better to want what you have than to have what you want." In that way, she's a most excellent role model.

A mom to include in your prayers today

Chicago Fire Dept. Capt. Annette Nance-Holt is suffering through her first Mother's Day without her son, 16-year-old Blair Holt. I wonder if it's any comfort for her to know that he died a hero, and that his last words were, "Tell my mom and dad I love them."

Last Thursday, an expelled gangbanger got onto a CTA bus and opened fire on his former classmates. Blair Holt, an honor student and all around good kid, pushed Tiara Reed down in her seat. Because of his quick thinking, Tiara was hit in the foot and will recover fully. Blair was struck in the abdomen and died.

Blair did not know the boy who shot him.

His mother said Blair, "was the kind of kid that if I could have gone shopping and picked one out, it would have still been him. He was my best friend."

I don't know how she will get through today. But once she does, Captain Holt and her husband, Officer Ronald Holt of the Chicago Police Dept.'s gang crimes unit, have to face June 1, the day that would have been Blair's 17th birthday.

What has happened to this family, and to this city, is a sin. There are too many guns and obviously they are still too easy to obtain. There are economic issues that make life appear so hopeless to some of us that gang life seems like a viable option. Our attitude toward one another has become so coarse that murdering your classmates seems like acceptable recourse. But those problems existed last week and will exist next week.

Today, as I honor my own mother, I'm going to concentrate my prayers and thoughts and energy on Capt. Annette Nance-Holt, too.

The International Association of Black Professional Fire Fighters has set up a fund in memory of Blair Holt. Contributions are being accepted at:

The Blair Holt Scholarship Fund
Seaway National Bank
P.O. Box 19522
Chicago, IL 60619
Attn: Personal Banking
773/487-4800

What? What is it? TELL ME!

I'm nervous. Anxious. Tense. Apprehensive about something, but I don't know what it is. It feels like there's something BIG around the corner, but I can't imagine what it is. This is my night to relax, just me and the Cubs. So why aren't I relaxed? What is it that's gnawing away at me? I wish it would just happen already, so I could deal with it and get past it.

And I love him … them … all of them

This is the flip-side of my TT post about celebs I hate. There are also celebs I love. Very much. OK, I admit it: my mind is a motel. And these gentlemen are my most frequent objets d'lust. As luck would have it, there are 13 of them, too, so I shall consider this TT.2

1. George Clooney. It’s not just how heavenly he looks in a tux. How can you not love the man who used his popularity and power to make Good Night and Good Luck? And while he takes his craft seriously, he doesn’t take himself seriously.

2. Greg Maddux. He has the most darling face, like a 6’ tall Precious Moments doll. The dichotomy is that this sweet-faced, bland-voiced guy is one of the best pitchers there ever was/ever will be. So within that average exterior must beat a tenacious, committed, passionate heart. And that’s soooo sexy.


3. Bruce Willis. Love his smirk. Love his shoulders. Love him as an action star (Die Hard, Armageddon) and his character parts (13 Blocks, In Country) and his supporting roles (Pulp Fiction, Nobody’s Fool). Love him.


4. Bruce Springsteen. He has the heart of a poet and a body by Nautilus.


5. Paul McCartney. I love him. I always have, since I was 6 years old. He’s my doe-eyed troubadour.

6. Patrick Dempsey. Great face, great hair, and somehow you just know he’ll smell good. I would love to have him sidle up beside me in an elevator.

7. Hugh Grant. Maybe it’s the McCartney influence, but I’m simply a sucker for Brits who can’t keep their hair out of their eyes.

8. John Edwards. He has clear blue eyes and terrific hair. His accent is so honey smooth I can listen to him for hours. (And, back when I was a Kerry-Edwards campaign worker, I did.) And there's something very sexy about a man who loves his wife so much. I keep hoping he'll come through and give me an unassailable reason to support him for President. (Other than Elizabeth.)

9. George Stephanopolous. My other politico/heartthrob. Truly terrific hair. I love watching him be all boyish, and then bore into some candidate with the one question he didn’t want asked.

10. Chris Meloni. Or, actually, Elliott Stabler, his character on L&O:SVU. Intense and honest and good and true – with a very hot bod.

11. Robert Redford. Not now. I’m afraid I could kill him now. But Redford in the mid 1970s is as gorgeous as it gets. Especially that scene in the Way We Were when he appeared onscreen in his Navy Whites. The only man who could possibly look that hot in uniform is …

12. Richard Gere. Ah, that last scene in Officer and a Gentleman! In a way, he’s the anti-Redford in that he looks better with each passing year.

13. Johnny Depp. What a face! Cheekbones carved from stone. And any man who is that comfortable in himself and in his talent just has to be good in bed.

Whew! Sorry, but I've got to go. Doing this list has left me exhausted!

This is the only home I've ever owned

I'm suffering with a combination of tummy ache/menstrual cramps today. Consequently I'm not moving too much, sticking to the sofa. From my perch I'm able to survey my condo, and am dreaming of all the things I'd like to do with it …

• New drapes in the living room and the master bedroom
• Ceramic tile starting in the kitchen and going on into the dining area
• New carpet in the living room/hallway
• New kitchen counters and new fronts for the cabinets
• New toilet, sink and wall tile in the bathroom
• A fresh coat of paint on everything

Sigh. I am $3,000 away from having 8 months' living expenses in the bank. That's important because in advertising, you can be laid off at any time, and I am my only source of income/support. So socking away that last $3,000 has to be my priority before I can take on the bigger projects, like the kitchen and the bathroom.

But I think I will start shopping around for window coverings. Certainly I can do that without much expense.

This is the only home I've ever owned, and I have this vision of what I can make it. But it seems like I'll never be able to do it all! In 2006 I had the unexpected expenses of a new air conditioner, new refrigerator and new windows. This past week I had to have some wiring redone. All this crap was necessary, but none of it was fun. And it was all costly enough to keep me from accumulating that last $3,000.

Ah, the joys of being a homeowner!

I admit it's not all about the news

I am a news junkie. First thing I do in the morning is turn on the local news and Today. First thing I do when I get home from work is switch on MSNBC. I get email alerts all day from the Chicago Tribune, the Boston Globe and CNN. I always worry that something is happening that I should know about.

There are reasons I remain so loyal to NBC. Part of it is my almost limitless respect for Tim Russert and my genuine affection for (HA!) Chris Matthews. But another part of it is THE CLOTHES.

I love checking out what Meredith Vieria and Campbell Brown are wearing. Today Meredith has a pale pink coat with a big pointy collar. I love it. I could never wear such a coat because I take the el and there's no way I could keep it clean. But I love the collar, and how it looks with her light gray slacks.

Campbell is my favorite. She used to really relish red, but she's experimenting with other colors and has inspired me to do so. I've decided to add rich browns to my predominantly green, blue and lavender wardrobe.

I read Allure and Glamour and More. But I like seeing fashions on women who are moving. (How do those slacks look when she crosses her legs?) And, while these women are certainly fit and beautiful, they neither model thin, nor model young.

Does this make me hideously shallow? (Or even garden-variety shallow?)

Chinese Freeze tag- 10 Interesting Facts about me

I was tagged by JennyMcb (right) of J's Thoughts and Musings (jennymcb.blogspot.com) and I need to tell 10 interesting facts about myself. This can be something shocking or anything that may become a surprise to people! So have fun here goes...

(I shall parallel Jenny's 10)

1. I was always one of the shortest in my class. I tell people I'm 5'2, but it's not true. Anything less than that, though, just doesn't sound like an adult to me.

2. I am hooked on Turbo 21 at pogo.com

3. I'm not at all tech-savvy, which is why you never see links in any of my posts.

4. I miss the olden days when enormous Judith Light/Who's the Boss glasses were in vogue. My sight is so bad and the new frames are so narrow that I don't trust my peripheral vision and am unsure of myself on stairs.

5. I won $10 in a creative writing contest when I was in third grade. It was for a paragraph about my teacher, Mrs. Kessell.

6. I have never shoplifted anything.

7. I have an irrational dislike for Scarlett Johannsen.

8. I regularly receive certificates from the Illinois Secretary of State, applauding my perfect driving record. Since I don't have a car, my record is not hard to maintain.

9. I cannot recall the last time I cried in front of anyone.

10. I'm not a big one for participating in church. It's a very personal experience between me and God. I don't feel like mingling afterwards.

Now if you haven't checked out Jenny's list, do so now so you can compare and contrast.

A Giant

It's been a month and I'm still inching through Doris Kearns Goodwin's Team of Rivals. I'm enjoying it, so I'm kinda glad it's slow going. When I finally complete it, I'll miss Lincoln's cabinet (especially Salmon Chase), his family, and most of all, the melancholy man himself.

So wise, so insightful, so articulate! In 1848, Rep. Lincoln accused President Polk of "hoping to escape scrutiny by fixing the public gaze upon the brightness of military glory, that serpent's eye that charms to destroy." He went on to compare Polk's war message to, "the half-insane mumblings of a fever dream."

Is it any wonder why I'd prefer to stay back in the 1800s with Lincoln? Yes, we have a lot of heartache ahead of us. (Eddie has already died. We still have to mourn Willie. Then there's the nightmare of the Civil War and the night at the theater.) But damn, he was an exceptional human being, and even the bad times are enlightening when you're with Abe.

Now this is important to know!

Everyone should be able to identify their inner Brady!

I Am Jan Brady

Brainy and a little introverted, I tend to think life is a lot worse than it actually is. And while I may think I'm a little goofy looking, most people consider me to be a major babe.

What Brady Are You?

Oh, there are two Americas, all right!

Last night I watched the Republican Debate. I felt it was part of my duty as a good, grown-up, patriotic American … even if it meant cutting into my time with McDreamy.

The debate took place at the Reagan Library, and all ten candidates kept trying to position themselves as Reagan's rightful heir. OK. I'm told that the Reagan Era is to conservatives what Camelot is to liberals. I can understand that.

The part that I didn't understand at all was the way the candidates all reacted when Chris Matthews asked if it would be a good thing for America if Bill Clinton was back in the White House.

They all laughed! LAUGHED! Falling over one another to be tied to Reagan's legacy and laughing at Bill Clinton? I felt as though I had fallen into an alternative universe.

I never hated Ronald Reagan. His administration just left me feeling sad about my country. It seemed that if you weren't a rich white guy, the Reagan Administration had no interest in helping you improve your lot in life. The topics that matter/mattered to me as a woman were an anathema to those folks. My friends of color, as well as my gay friends, felt completely invisible to the Reaganites. Bush 41 seemed like an extension of that.

Then along came Bill. Like in a Warner Brothers cartoon, music played, the clouds broke, the sun came out, the little woodland creatures re-emerged and life was good again. We all felt we had a place at the table. We could be trusted to make choices about OUR OWN BODIES. Guns shouldn't be standard issue. AIDS was a health problem, not a punishment from God against homosexuals. Bill Clinton seemed like he was interested in being everyone's President.

We miss him. And no matter how we feel about Hillary, we certainly would never LAUGH at the prospect of having him back in the White House.

So John Edwards is right after all. There really are two Americas. I saw that so clearly last night.

My life as Lucy

Every now and again I do something so stupid that I feel like I'm channeling Lucy Riccardo. This morning brought such a moment.

I am trying to be a little greener. This morning, when I went to the kitchen for some paper towels to use in the bathroom as I refreshed/reNaired my bikini line, I tore a couple off the roll and then grabbed the paper napkins that came with last night's carryout. Why waste them? Why not use them?

So I'm sitting on the side of the tub tending to my nether region and listening to the oldies station. Two thoughts occurred to me -- Michelle Phillips is the only surviving member of the Mamas and the Papas, and I can't recall how long I've had the Nair there. Has it been four minutes yet? Has it been less than ten minutes? I truly don't know. The tube warns that very bad things will happen if I leave the Nair on too long.

Deciding that I don't want to risk possible pain down there, I grab a paper napkin and begin wiping away the cream. I look at the napkin and see little dots of orange. ORANGE! Oh … my … God! What have I done to myself? Where could the orange be coming from?

Last night's dinner was cheese pizza. I'm such an idiot.

Hi. I'm old.

I can't party the way I used to in years gone by. I went out three nights in a row this week and all I want today is a nap.

Monday night my best friend got into town. We had a very nice dinner, I had two drinks, and I was home by about 11:00 and in bed by midnight. That shouldn't be too taxing on the old bod, right?

Tuesday night we met after work at a bar with an extensive martini menu. We were going to try a new place for dinner, but somehow we never got there. I had two martinis and a beer, along with 3 or 4 really cute little hamburgers. Kinda like gourmet sliders. He outdrank me by two-to-one and was definitely bobbing and weaving on the way back to his hotel. Got home that night just before 1:00.

I was fine yesterday morning, but as the day wore on, I wore out. I'm trying not to depend so much on Coca Cola Classic for energy and I successfully limited myself to two cans, but it wasn't easy. Especially because another friend and I had tickets for Camelot with Michael York. She was as excited by this play as I was about Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, so I couldn't disappoint her. Before the show we had a big dinner (I had a hardy but heavy dish -- chicken stuffed with two kinds of cheese -- and it was probably not the best choice under the circumstances). Just one beer. And I admit that towards the end of the first act (you remember, when the knights are competing with one another and Lancelot and the Queen start making goo-goo eyes), I kinda nodded off. I think I recovered nicely when the lights came up for intermission. I was home by 11:00 and in bed by (how long does it take to fill cat bowls with kibble?) 11:03 or so.

I have no big plans for the weekend beyond a massage tomorrow after work, and I must admit I'm grateful for the respite.

Isn't this pathetic?

When did this happen? When did I get old and tired? What happened to the girl who used to party like it's 1999? Back in the day, every evening was it's own pub crawl as my friends and I searched for the best juke box and the perfect wine spritzer and generous new friends who would let us fuel our partying with their cocaine. The old me wouldn't be tired today!

I guess that Gal went the way of juke boxes and wine spritzers and Duran Duran and shoulder pads and all other relics of the 1980s. I guess that's just the natural order of things. Tonight it's just me and the TV.

Thursday Thirteen #15 -- Little things that mean a lot

Thirteen Things that delight THE GAL HERSELF Norman Maine referred to “little jabs of pleasure, like when a swordfish takes the hook.” I believe our lives are filled with those little jabs of pleasure … moments of joy that touch your heart a bit on even the saddest days. Here are 14 of mine (I included an honorable mention), listed in the order they occurred to me. 1. Chicago’s lakefront. The vastness of our great Great Lake never fails to take my breath away. 2. Oldies. Singing tunelessly along when a truly cheesy 70s always gives me the giggles. I may not be able to remember where I left my checkbook, but I do know all the lyrics to “The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia.” 3. Talking to my mom. We blab on the phone for about an hour every weekend. Every now and again it washes over me that we aren’t exclusively mother and daughter anymore; we’re also two women who like one another. I think that’s quite cool 4. My best friend’s name and number. I love coming around my desk to see the message light on alongside his number. Or opening my email to see his name there. Doesn’t matter what he has to say. I’m just glad he’s out there somewhere. 5. Pat and Ron. How to describe the Cubs radio team? As utterly charming, that’s how. I’d always rather listen to a game than watch because of them. Ron is Ron Santo, Cubs All-Star third baseman and one of the most idiosyncratic, and least objective, baseball broadcasters you’ll ever hear. More than once I’ve known a call hasn’t gone our way because I’ve heard Ronnie literally groan in my ear. He’s also one of the bravest, most positive characters around. He’s had so many health problems, and yet he always manages to sound upbeat (unless an outfielder loses one in the vines). Pat is Pat Hughes, the play-by-play man and the professional broadcaster in the booth. His pipes are spell binding and his wry sense of humor helps even the most broken-hearted Cub fan find something positive about any given game. 6. Paul McCartney. And I love him. Have since I was 6 years old. He’s provided the soundtrack of my life. From “All My Loving” to “Fine Line,” his familiar voice can always make me smile. 7. The sky. I love just looking out at the sky. From a cloudless light blue to a stormy gray to a starry black night. There’s a beauty and personality to its every form. 8. Chocolate. Dark chocolate. Hot chocolate. Hershey’s chocolate. Ghirardelli’s chocolate. Hostess cupcakes chocolate. It’s all good. 9. Going through my mail. There is always the possibility that I’ll find something exciting in there. Found money … a letter from my cousin … a magazine with McDreamy on the cover … 10. Really bad movies. Glen or Glenda. Valley of the Dolls. Change of Habit. Give me an unspeakably bad movie, a big glass of milk and a box of Nilla Vanilla Wafers and just watch my mood improve. 11. Really good movies. Casablanca. Citizen Kane. Gone with the Wind. It’s a cliché, but the classics really don’t ever go out of style, or even appear dated. 12. Going to the movies. I’m not talking about what I’m watching; I’m referring to the actual act of going to the show. You know, grabbing your popcorn or your Sno Caps and settling into your seat in a darkened theater. Beginning with the coming attractions, there’s a romance to it that I love. 13. Saving money. Rebate checks, coupons, airline miles, interest paid … The amount doesn’t matter. It’s the adventure of saving the money. It always leaves me feeling I’ve accomplished something. Am I allowed an honorable mention? That would go to watching my cat Joey sleep. Not only does he look like he’s smiling, he moves a lot when in the throes of serious napping. My favorite nap position is kinda-sorta on his back, with his right rear leg sticking up. He manages to look positively ridiculous and completely adorable at the same time. Links to other Thursday Thirteens! Thanks to everyone for your positive comments. Each one was an additional "jab of pleasure," too! 1. Check out Sue's very first TT at doubledeckerbuses.org/urbanzoo 2 Courtney has a baker's dozen of dumb celebrity quotes at fifer-traeger.blogspot.com 3. See if the 13 things on your desk are the same as Carol's at themediansib.com 4. There's a visual intriguing TT is at impworks.blogspot.com 5. Tinkerbell's TT will make you wish you were more witchy: tinkerbell-nl.blogspot.com 6. Dew's literary TT is at deweymonster.com 7. For a unique and entertaining TT approach to dieting, go to thiseclecticlife.com 8. Do you wonder what 13 things Mitchell and Keri keep in the frig? Find out at westofmars.blogspot.com 9. Wylie's colorful TT is at wyliekinson.blogspot.com 10. Janet's TT is filled with things she loves that begin with the letter L: www.fondofsnape.com 11. Go to thommalyn.blogspot.com and find yourself drawn in by a TT of intriguing first line of novels. 12. For the "stuff" of she's life, check out her TT at daemon-ink.net/blog 13. Journeywoman gives well deserved props to her thirteen favorite teachers at journeywoman.typepad.com 14. For a cute, cute, cute visual TT, go to theflatlandalmanack.typepad.com/the_flatland_chronicles 15. Rose's grown-up and funny TT is at rosedesrochers.todays-woman.net 16. Healthy Nadine's first TT is tips for a good night's sleep: healthifica.com 17. Samantha's TT is funny, romantic and hopeful, and you can read it for yourself at samsquietspot.blogspot.com


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An appreciation of La Liz

When I was growing up, Liz Taylor was one of the most famous women in the world. Jackie Kennedy Onassis was her only competition. Princess Grace and Sophia Loren certainly had their fans, but when it came to dominating magazine covers, Liz and Jackie were in a class by themselves.

Jackie is a woman I always admired. Stylish and stoic, smart and enigmatic, she is still the lady I wish I could be. Liz, on the other hand, had become a garish joke. She and Burton always seemed to be drinking, fighting and smoking. She wore mu-mus and obscenely big diamonds and too much makeup. Her movies sucked.

But then I discovered her old movies, and suddenly I understood what all the fuss was about. She might not ever have been a great actress, but for a time she was a most compelling movie star. Did they coin the phrase, "she makes love to the camera" about her? If they didn't, they could have. Her cinematic charisma is genuine and powerful, like a force of nature.

She herself once said, "Some of my best leading men have been dogs and horses," and that's certainly true of her child-star years. She's so affectionate and natural when she throws her arms around Lassie or The Pie that you remember that your first great love was was four-legged, too.

Her teen movies are all pretty dopey, as MGM teen movies tended to be. The only one I've watched more than once is Little Women. She made a terrifically selfish, yet somehow lovable, blonde Amy.

Then she grew up, and her beauty was breathtaking. Father of the Bride and Father's Little Dividend show her as this ideal little 1950s girl. She had no aspirations in the world beyond being a good daughter, then a beautiful bride, a supportive wife and a loving mom.

Then came A Place in the Sun. She is fabulous in this film, literally the embodiment of the American dream. She made a ton of really great movies during this period. She came to dominate the screen and seem somehow more modern, more vibrant and more carnal than anyone around her. Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, Giant, Suddenly Last Summer, even Butterfield 8 (a movie she hates) are all watchable and rewatchable because of her.

Then there's her Martha. Her work in Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? is the high water mark of her career. This was the perfect material for her contemporary, carnal qualities and she is simply brilliant. I had the opportunity to see Virginia Woolf live a few weeks back. Kathleen Turner was ill that night, so I don't know if her live Martha could have eclipsed Liz' cinematic creation. But the understudy who played the part was unable to erase the memory of Liz's boozy voice barking out those lines.

Now when you think of Liz, it's easy to dismiss her as silly. Her friendship with Michael Jackson, her weight gain, her ceaseless health problems, her addictions, her jewelry. I understand this because when I was growing up, I thought she at best irrelevant and at worst frivolous.

But then I saw her work, and I'm the better for it. Thank you, Dame Elizabeth, for some indelible screen moments.

My apologizes, Bernie. This is worse.

From the Today Show, April 25.

ANN CURRY: Do you know the American people are suffering… watching [Iraq]?

LAURA BUSH: Oh, I know that very much, and, believe me, no suffers more than their president and I do when we watch this. And certainly the commander-in-chief who has asked our military to go into harm's way.

ANN CURRY: What do you think the American people need to know…

LAURA BUSH: Well, I hope they do know the burden of worry that's on his shoulders every single day for our troops. And I think they do. I think if they don't, they're not seeing what the real responsibilities of our president are.

Whoa! So those silly Goldstar mothers can't touch your pain, Laura? Those veterans who lived among the mold and the rats at Walter Reed have nothing on GWB, eh?

Senator Kerry made an admittedly very bad joke and was pilloried. This woman trips over her tongue in the most offensive of ways and we're all just supposed to love her to bits.

Yeah, whatever.

Don't this just beat all?

Bernard McGuirk, the producer of Imus' erstwhile radio show, has lost his job. My first response was, "Good!" He'd always been more toxic than Imus and, worse by my lights, no where near as funny. Imagine my surprise then when I learned that he and Imus had been victimized in this whole ugly, media-sodden episode. And not only that, they had been victimized in a truly historic way that should stand as a sober warning to us all.

He appeared on Fox last week and here's a transcript of what he said: "I mean, it's like the off-quoted anti-Nazi German pastor who said, you know, first, they came for the Communists, but I wasn't a Communist, so I didn't say anything. Then they came for the Jews, but I'm not a Jew, I didn't say anything. Then they came for the Catholics, but I'm a Protestant. Then when they came from me, there was nobody to speak."

No, really. I'm not making this up. Imus' producer likens himself to those who suffered in the camps during WWII.

I work in advertising, an industry almost as volatile as broadcasting. McGuirk had a cushy gig for a long time and he lost it. When you work in advertising or broadcasting, THIS HAPPENS!!! We all know we're not going to earn a gold watch for service to one company. McGuirk was going to lose this job eventually. It might have been over ratings. It might have been over a contract dispute. It might have been because some new conglomerate bought CBS radio and wanted to cut costs. I promise you, it was going to happen eventually. And when it happens, you should blow a kiss to the heavens and say, "Thanks for the ride." You should be grateful that you have six months' expenses in the bank and start looking for another job. You should not liken yourself to a prisoner in a concentration camp.

Shame on you, McGuirk.


www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,268970,00.html

A tale of two famous men

Two men I've never met are on my mind a lot these days.

White House Press Secretary Tony Snow is back at work. His cancer has returned, but he's working hard to maintain his strength and normalcy. Yes, I'm still a dyed-in-the-wool Democrat. But I admire how well Snow has responded, first to his boss' plummeting polls, now to his health crisis. He is a gracious gentleman with good manners and a respect for the English language, and it's safe to say I find all those attributes sorely lacking in this Bush Administration. Welcome back, Mr. Snow. I wish you nothing but the best.

Only 29 years old, Cardinals pitcher Josh Hancock was killed in a car crash last weekend. The information reached me in dribs and drabs. First I heard on Sunday morning that the Cubs/Cardinals game was postponed. No reason given. I was pissed because I love this rivalry, and because it was sunny and clear here in Chicago with no rain in the forecast. How could the weather be so bad in St. Louis that the game was postponed? Then I heard. So sad, and so eerie. Josh Hancock is the second Cardinals pitcher to die during a Cubs/Cards series this millennium! What are the odds? The Cardinal players will wear their fallen comrades' number on their arms all season in tribute. So very sad.