WWW.WEDNESDAY

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here.  

1. What are you currently reading? Clammed Up by Barbara Ross. Julia Snowden left Maine and the family clambake business for the bright lights of Manhattan. But, like Michael Corleone, her family pulled her back in. So now she's back, helping expand the business to include events. Her plans go terribly wrong when one of the first wedding crashers is a murderer, and the best man ends up dead.

I'm liking this book so far because the backdrop includes peril and real tension, but not of the violent kind. A tourist-based company like the Snowden's only has a few summer months to make their money for the year. The longer the police keep their business shut down, the more difficult it will be for them to stay open. Maybe it's because so many independent companies and family-owned businesses didn't make it through covid, but I really feel for Julia.

 

I've always wanted to try the Maine Clambake Series -- Kwizgiver is a fan -- and when Book #1 became available from the library, I snapped it up. I always try to, as Julie Andrews sang, "start at the very beginning, a very good place to start."

2. What did you recently finish reading? Fatal Vision by Joe McGinnis. In the annals of true crime, the Jeffrey MacDonald case is legend. A handsome Green Beret captain, he was accused of killing his wife and two little girls in their home on the Army base. No one wanted to believe he did it. But he did.

 

For me, though, the most compelling character is Fred Kassab. His stepdaughter, Collette, began dating Jeff MacDonald when they were in the 9th grade. Fred watched Jeff grow up, marry his stepdaughter, and start a family. Shortly after the murders, he told the Army and the press he stood by Jeff, that if he'd been blessed with another daughter, he'd want the same son-in-law.

 

But slowly, he began to notice things were wrong with his son-in-law's story. (Example: why did Jeff insist they'd never owned an ice pick -- one of the murder weapons -- when Freddy had seen his wife use theirs last Christmas?) He didn't understand how Jeff could begin dating again so soon after losing Colette and the girls, or why he kept finding excuses not to share forensic and legal evidence with Fred.

Fred's evolving realization that the one who destroyed his stepdaughter and grandchildren was someone he loved is really the heart of this story. And once Fred truly understands, he won't let it go. He did not rest until Jeffrey MacDonald was brought to justice.

3. What will you read next? Ma'am Darling: 99 Glimpses of Princess Margaret by Craig Brown.

Happy Birthday to Me, Part 1

Tuesday was my birthday. I'm glad I saved my gifts from far off lands to the East (like Florida) until Tuesday morning to open because they brightened my mood.

I posted this photo on Facebook to thank everyone who mailed me goodies and let them know everything arrived safe and sound. (Thank you especially, Snarkela.)

My friend Elaine is going to be fine. She has a bruised rib and an unsightly bruise on her cheek, but nothing serious. Still, she was 12 hours in the ER, so she was exhausted and we didn't go out.

But Kathleen and Joanna both checked in, promising that we'll get together after Thanksgiving. Kathleen has had health problems and is super busy at work. Joanna is never on time for birthdays. She depends on Facebook to let her know birthdays roll around. 

My oldest friend called, letting me know my gift is in the mail from California and promises that I'll love it.

I'll see John and Gregory on Thanksgiving and we'll celebrate me then, too.

Rita started at work on my birthday. We finally have another writer! I consider her a birthday present. I've been so busy and stressed. It'll be good to have help. I may even be able to take a few more of my vacation days before the end of the year.

So it wasn't great, but it wasn't bad, either. It was fine. I had a fine birthday.

Compassion Challenge -- Day 22

I'm encouraged to participate in this November challenge with my church congregation.

Inspiring Compassion: The 30 Day Compassion Challenge. 30 days to explore the topic of compassion: Mindfulness, Compassion for Friends & Family, Self-Compassion, Compassion for All, Compassion for Our Planet.

Monday, I reached back.

An old friend, someone I was very close to at one time, reached out to me for my birthday. An ecard with a personal message: Gal, thinking about you and hope you are doing well.

My first response? I don't need this. I literally haven't heard from him since my Cubs won the World Series in 2016. I'd been very hurt by silence on my 2016 birthday and Christmas 2016, and then tried to let it go. Some bruises don't ever heal completely, though. I'd trusted him, thought we were part of one anothers lives. And then suddenly, and without any real explanation, radio silence.

So my birthday 2021 is special? What was wrong with 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019 and 2020?

Then I thought, something must be going on in his life that made him reach out. So I reached back. I emailed back that I appreciated him remembering me on my special day and that I hoped he was well, too.

I felt better for having done it. Compassion for him, and compassion for me.

 

Pity Party, Table for One

Tomorrow is my birthday. Elaine from movie group and I were going to have dinner together at one of my favorite newly-reopened restaurants, The Madison Tavern.

She just called to cancel. She's in the ER. She was the second car in a three-car accident on Michigan Avenue and her airbag deployed. She's in shock and her chest hurts.

And I'm sad because now I have no birthday plans. Shame on me.

There are five gifts and a card on my sofa, waiting for me to tear into. People have suffered worse fates.

I'll see John for Thanksgiving and my birthday on Thursday. Kathleen keeps saying we'll get together, but she had to take time off work and now she's working crazy hours so while she keeps floating ideas, dates and times out there, she doesn't commit to anything. Joanna will no doubt reach out tomorrow, when Facebook reminds her it's my birthday.

Elaine is in the hospital, Gal. Hurt and scared. Get over yourself!

Sunday Stealing

Stolen from the Daily Good

1) What teacher are you most thankful for and why?  What did you learn from him or her? My third grade teacher. She was so warm and made us feel like we weren't wrong, we just needed to try again.

2) What’s the season you’re most thankful for, and what’s your favorite part of each season? I'm a big fan of each season. Right now I'm thankful that my new team at work is so supportive, and yet my favorite part of the season is my upcoming five-day weekend. We've been really busy, and I'm tired.

3) What electronic device are you most grateful for, and what does it add to your life? Air conditioning. I hate hot weather. AC allows me to focus.

4) What musician or type of music are you most thankful for?

5) What are you most grateful for that brings beauty to your daily life? The sky. The colors of the sky always make me happy (even the dark, stormy skies).

6) What philanthropic cause or organization do you feel thankful for? I think I'll choose the ones that focus on animals. They have no say in what happens and are completely dependent on us. I am thankful for the people who look out for them.

7) What foods are you most thankful for? I like dressing/stuffing. I'm glad it's on the menus again.

8) What local store or restaurant are you most grateful for?  How does it contribute to your quality of life? My favorite Chinese restaurant is kind of like the little engine that could. It's independently owned and suffered during the pandemic. But they're still here! I think that's inspiring.

9) What book are you most grateful for, and why? So many! I'm going with this coffee table book because it's my distraction. I pick it up and find myself transported into Jackie's 1970s Manhattan (or Skorpios) life.

 

10) What act of kindness has made the greatest difference in your life? It's hard to isolate just one. I'm going to say that the acts of kindness I've done have probably made the greatest difference because they teach me about my fellow man and give me insights into the world around me.

11) What challenging experience has ended up changing your life for the better? I had a cancer scare that made a total abdominal hysterectomy necessary. I'd never had major surgery before. I've never been so scared before. Both important learning experiences. Also, after I got home from the hospital, my mom stayed with me for a few days. I treasure those mother/daughter moments now.

12) What vacation are you most grateful for? My first solo spa getaway. I discovered I like traveling alone and I enjoy my own company.

13) Name three days in your life that you feel especially grateful for. Seeing Sir Paul for the first time at the Chicago Stadium in 1976, and the births of my favorite niece and nephew.

14) What product do you use on a daily basis that you most appreciate? Coca Cola!

15) What, from this year, do you feel most grateful for? Getting to know my boss, Aaron. He is a genuinely good person, and a talented one, and he has re-energized me.

 

Compassion Challenge -- Day 20

I'm encouraged to participate in this November challenge with my church congregation.

Inspiring Compassion: The 30 Day Compassion Challenge. 30 days to explore the topic of compassion: Mindfulness, Compassion for Friends & Family, Self-Compassion, Compassion for All, Compassion for Our Planet.

Friday I ran to my "other" bank, the small community bank where my condo association has an account, not the corporate behemoth where I bank.* I was depositing $70.25 in quarters from our building laundry room.

Anyway, I saw a big box, wrapped in red and white Christmas paper, intended for toy donations for children and teens who would be spending the holidays at the local shelter for battered women. It was completely empty. 

Now maybe it was empty because it had just been placed on the floor. (After all, it's not even Thanksgiving yet.) Or maybe it was empty because it had just been emptied. But its cavernous emptiness gnawed at me.

Imagine between a child or a teen, living at the shelter with your mom because your dad is a batterer. Think about what kind of Christmas those kids can expect to have. Yes, they are physically safe, and that is no small thing. I'm proud that my community makes these women and children a priority.

But how much joy and normalcy is there for these kids, who ended up in this shelter through no fault of their own? I hurt for them.

After the bank, I had to stop at Target for stuff and things. I threw a little card of three pairs of earrings -- green jingle bells, reindeer and red ornaments -- in my cart. Today (Saturday) I walked long way around to pick up my lunch and made sure I made it to the bank before closing.

Those earrings didn't come anywhere near filling up the box, but now it's not completely empty. I know that some girl (I imagine her to be between 10 and 15) will be handed those earrings by Santa. When she goes back to school after the holiday break, and her classmates ask her what she got for Christmas, she can tell them she got three pairs of earrings.

On the way home, I picked up a Hotwheels 5-pack. This coming Wednesday (or maybe Friday), I will go out of my way to drop those off, too. It's not the toy, it's the normalcy I want to give some kid. I want to make sure his Christmas 2021 doesn't stand out as completely different from all the others in his past and future.

Judging by the emptiness of the box, not everyone responds right away to things like this. So first of all, I'm grateful that I do. It's like that Bible verse: "Whatever you did for the least of my brothers, you did for me." Acts like this give me joy because they bring me closer to Christ.

Second, I'm grateful that I have the extra $7-$10 to spend every time I stop into Target. I'm sure that there are those who want to help but just can't right now.

This week, my art director and I joined forced to buy some Polly Pockets, as requested by a little girl for a toy drive sponsored at work.

It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas, in all the right ways.

 

*They give me good service, so I have no harsh words for thee behemoth. I'm just striking a comparison.

Compassion Challege -- Day 19

I'm encouraged to participate in this November challenge with my church congregation.

Inspiring Compassion: The 30 Day Compassion Challenge. 30 days to explore the topic of compassion: Mindfulness, Compassion for Friends & Family, Self-Compassion, Compassion for All, Compassion for Our Planet.

Friday I gave a little of my time to Alban. He's the high school student who is a complete anachronism. He doesn't like any of the music or movies that are popular now and rhapsodizes about the culture of MY youth (much of it crap, Troy Donahue, for example). I sense that he's quite lonely in real life -- how many of his classmates mourned when Keith Allison died? -- and am glad that he has a tribe of Facebook followers.

Anyway, he's seriously into Elvis, which I applaud. He's also very indiscriminate, thinking just about turd The King squeezed out is worthy of attention. Elvis once famously said that the only thing "worse than watching a bad movie is being in one," and was aware that much of his 1960s work was subpar. But Alban loves it all.

He IM'd me on Friday, wanting to discuss Frankie & Johnnie, Harum Scarum and other Elvis movies that are just beyond awful. I wouldn't do that. I mean first of all, I was working Friday. Secondly, I didn't want to be a hypocrite. Those movies blow. 

But a lonely boy in another state was reaching out to me. That's a gift in a way, isn't it? And so I answered him, saying, "Let's not talk about where we disagree and focus on what we have in common." We shared an online conversation about King Creole, Viva Las Vegas and Follow that Dream. I gave him a little movie trivia -- King Creole was directed by Oscar winner Michael Curtiz, famous for Casablanca. 

Alban was happy.

That's the thing about this compassion challenge: it's so EASY to lift someone else's spirits if I just stop to think about it!

Mindfulness, mindfulness, mindfulness.

 

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Somewhere (1983)

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

1) This song is from the hit musical West Side Story. It has just been remade by Steven Speilberg. Are you interested in seeing the 2021 version? Eh. I appreciate Steven Speilberg but WSS has never been one of my favorites. If I stumble across the new version here at home I'll watch it, but it's not one I'll go out of my way to catch at the theater.

Now this is the one I'm waiting for! I'm so happy that Lucille Ball is getting her due as an artist and a trailblazer. (Wait for her off-camera chuckle at the end. Kidman nailed that.)

 

2) Growing up, Crazy Sam thought this song was called, "A Place for Us." Tell us about a song whose title or lyrics you got wrong or misheard. Many. This is the first one that comes to mind. "Groovin'" by The Rascals. The lyrics really are, "Life would be ecstasy, you and me endlessly groovin' ..." I thought the lyrics were, "Life would be ecstasy, you and me and Leslie groovin' ..." Leslie? Who was Leslie? Why was she there? Wouldn't groovin' be more romantic with just two? (Yes, as a child I was quite the ninny. Still am at times.)

 

3) Barbra Streisand sings of longing for "time to spare, time to learn and time to care." The holidays are often too busy for many of us. With Thanksgiving almost upon us, do you wish you had more time? I'm good. I've been stressed lately but over work, not the holidays.

 
4) Early in her career, Barbra was pressured to have her nose fixed. She stubbornly refused, and did rather well anyway. Tell us about a time you resisted pressure. To this day I've never smoked. Not pot, nor a cigarette. And I won't.

 

5) In the late 1960s she briefly dated Canadian Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau, father of current PM Justin Trudeau. Obviously Barbra knew what became of Pierre and his family without having to look them up. Without the advantage of Google, do you know where one of your former loves is in 2021? My mom was good friends with the mom of my first boyfriend. I used to get regular updates on him that way. But now both moms are gone, so if I were to catch up with him, I'd have to resort to The Google Machine.

6) One of Barbra's hit movies is The Way We Were, a love story about hopelessly mismatched lovers. Streisand always wanted to do a sequel and worked with a screenwriter on a treatment. Her costar, Robert Redford, refused. He simply was not interested in revisiting his character. Is there a movie series that you especially enjoy?  The Thin Man movies. Love, love, love them.

7) Barbra met her husband, James Brolin, at a dinner thrown by friends. They hit it off immediately, but he had to leave the next day to begin a movie in Ireland, so they began their romance over the phone. Do you enjoy long phone calls? Would you prefer video calls (Zoom)? I'm a phone fan. Just naturally blabby, I guess.

8) On July 1, 1998, two years to the day after their first meeting, Barbra and Brolin married. It used to be that brides were advised against wearing white for their second wedding, but Barbra ignored that, wearing a white beaded gown. Do you believe brides should still avoid white the second time around? A bride should do whatever she wants. It's her day.

9) Random question: Is anyone on your bad side this morning? I'm trying to be positive. Not always succeeding, but trying!

 

Compassion Challenge -- Day 18

I'm encouraged to participate in this November challenge with my church congregation.

Inspiring Compassion: The 30 Day Compassion Challenge. 30 days to explore the topic of compassion: Mindfulness, Compassion for Friends & Family, Self-Compassion, Compassion for All, Compassion for Our Planet.

I have had Roy Hobbs for nearly a month now, and he's fine. Of course he is. Critters are my thing.

Yes, he was abused by his previous humans. The shelter warned me there might be problems. I knew there wouldn't be. I connect to animals. I get them, and they trust me.

When I first adopted Connie, nine years ago, she'd been labeled "special needs" because of her health problems. The shelter warned me I might have a hard time dosing her with her medication. I knew I wouldn't.

This is what I do. I'm good with animals.

I don't make friends so easily anymore. I can be insensitive and impatient with people. Yet I have almost limitless sensitivity and patience with animals. 

So while I acknowledge and appreciate my well of compassion for those who are smaller, weaker and dependent, I realize I need to work on my compassion for others.

 

Compassion Challenge -- Day 16

I'm encouraged to participate in this November challenge with my church congregation.

Inspiring Compassion: The 30 Day Compassion Challenge. 30 days to explore the topic of compassion: Mindfulness, Compassion for Friends & Family, Self-Compassion, Compassion for All, Compassion for Our Planet.

I messed up today and I felt bad.

Tuesday is the day we work in-office. There are so many weird little things that come up that I don't anticipate, things that occur because it's the only day we see one another. So I was late for a meeting. As I swung by the conference room, I put down my mug and ran to get my computer, saying, "Sorry I'm running late. Mary shanghaied me on my way to the coffee room."

When I came back, one of my millennial coworkers was reading the Oxford definition of "shanghaied" to the room. Apparently, the 20somethings had never heard it before.

I now know why. Hearing the definition, I realize how racially insensitive it is.

It doesn't matter that I said it innocently. I was wrong.

I'm relieved that at least I got it. One of the more confusing conundrums of today's political divide is how somehow racism is equated to patriotism and Christianity. (Note that some of the people who insist on calling covid "The China Virus" are ones who insist Christ guides their lives.) 

I learned. I regret. I will change my behavior. Time to move on, a little better for the experience. File this one under Self Compassion.

 

 

WWW.WEDNESDAY

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here.  

1. What are you currently reading? Fatal Vision by Joe McGinnis. This is a re-read for me, and it suddenly became available at the library so it's my current book. As good a reason to choose the next book as any, I suppose.

Dr. Jeffrey MacDonald was handsome and Princeton-educated. Not only a doctor, but a Green Beret. His family was murdered on horrific night. He was the only survivor, claiming that a drug-addled group broke into his home chanting, "Acid is groovy. Kill the pigs." They bludgeoned and stabbed MacDonald's pregnant wife and two little girls. They left him alive, with scratches and cuts and a collapsed lung.

How strange that the killers left the most physically consequential member of the family with the non-life threatening injuries. The acid must have really messed them up. Or ...

This is the true story of a search for justice. First on behalf of MacDonald's father-in-law, who refused to let the man who took away everything get away with murder. Then on behalf of the State of North Carolina. Finally on behalf of Joe McGinnis, the reporter MacDonald invited to embed with him and his legal team during the trial. That's how confident MacDonald was of acquittal: he wanted a best-selling author on hand to do a book and then split the royalties.

One of the (many) things that makes me sad as I read this is knowing Joe McGinnis died of cancer in 2014, while MacDonald is alive, in prison, and remarried in 2002. (Dr. MacDonald does love the ladies.)

2. What did you recently finish reading? The Nest by Cynthia D'Aprix Sweeney. "The Nest" is the nickname four adult siblings gave the nest egg left to them by their wealthy father. It had recently contained $2,000,000. Now, suddenly, more than half of it was gone. Their mother had used the funds to help her oldest out of a horrible situation completely of his own making. Naturally, his brother and sisters and upset.

I liked this book because the characters are so individual and so well drawn. Leo, Jack, Bea and Melody may not always be nice people -- who is? -- but they are unique and believable. Significant others and children are three dimensional, as well. I'm tempted to say that their mother, Frances, comes close to being a stereotype (in the birthday party scene, she reminds me of Shirley MacLaine in Postcards from the Edge), but then I realized she was a woman who had four children in rapid succession with a man she was incompatible with everywhere but the bedroom. Maybe that explains why Frances isn't exactly Florence Henderson from The Brady Bunch.

The Nest is a good book and I'm glad I read it.

3. What will you read next? Clammed Up by Barbara Ross. I've always wanted to try the Maine Clambake Series, and now Book #1 is available from the library.

Compassion Challenge -- Day 15

I'm encouraged to participate in this November challenge with my church congregation.

Inspiring Compassion: The 30 Day Compassion Challenge. 30 days to explore the topic of compassion: Mindfulness, Compassion for Friends & Family, Self-Compassion, Compassion for All, Compassion for Our Planet.

Today, I went out of my way to be inclusive of Bonnie in our movie group.

She annoys me. She gets every plot confused. She goes off on wild tangents. She wants even the darkest film noir to end with a wedding and babies. I want to box her ears.

But you know what? She loves classic movies and has every right to participate in our meet ups. So maybe I shouldn't be such a judgey bitch. When I mentioned that I was delighted that this week, "Bonnie got her happy ending," a smile crossed her face.

Now how hard was that? Not at all. I gave another person a moment of joy by doing the smallest thing.

However, as I try to be more compassionate, I refuse to be a hypocrite. Marvin droned on ... and on ... and on ... and kept explaining to us there's a difference between "ex-plicit" and "im-plicit." I really wished someone would tell him to shut the fuck up. So having a compassionate heart does not include having a false one.

File this one under Compassion for All.

 

 

Done!

I buckled in and buckled down and wrote six pages of copy for a booklet about investing for retirement.* I'm not tickled about working a full day on Sunday, but it felt good to be done.

I have to pick up another project first thing Monday morning. Not as difficult as the brochure: just a pair of emails about health insurance. I shouldn't say "just," because this email blast is important to my client's business plan. It's simply a less complicated task than a booklet with a bullet point devoted to "tax loss harvesting."

I am tired. 

It occurs to me that I have been doing this 43 years now. GULP!

My first copywriting job was for the Sears catalog. Sears closed their last Chicagoland store for good Sunday. It's fall and the trees are bare. I take all of these as signs that this part of my life is coming to a close.

The thing is, right now my stock at my agency is high as it's ever been. There were (many) times in the past that I've felt I was about to be canned and I was scared because I wasn't ready, financially or emotionally. I'll be 64 next week, which means I have Social Security to factor into my retirement plans, so looking at the finish line no longer causes anxiety.

*With the charts the client requested, I think it will be an 11-page brochure. Which cannot exist because a piece of paper has two sides. But right now, that's not my problem.

Compassion Challenge -- Day 14

I'm encouraged to participate in this November challenge with my church congregation.

Inspiring Compassion: The 30 Day Compassion Challenge. 30 days to explore the topic of compassion: Mindfulness, Compassion for Friends & Family, Self-Compassion, Compassion for All, Compassion for Our Planet.

Today, I'm using compassion to just "let it go." 

In our blogging community, there are bloggers I just avoid. Their toxic, angry messages are often cossetted in their own brand of Christianity and that really upsets me. Why use my faith to justify hostility and misinformation? I find it's better to just leave them be.

Anyway, feeling all compassionate because it's Sunday and because of this challenge, I decided to break my own rule and check in on one of these bloggers. She linked up for Saturday 9 and even commented on my blog so, hey! In the spirit of being friendly, let's read one another's words.

Mistake! As I was scrolling down to leave my benign response to her answers to the benign Saturday 9 questions and I learned that (as Saturday 9's author) I am "unspeakably rude" for asking such "intimate" questions and "demanding" an answer. I admit it got under my skin. My intent in doing Saturday 9 is to bring people closer.

I could have engaged. I did not. First of all, I suppose it's not the blogger's fault that one of her commenters is over the top. Secondly, why? The memes are meant to foster conversation,  community and fun.

Most of all, how sad a person must be to get lathered up over something like this. There are so many things to be genuinely upset about. I guess some simply must express ire over everything that crosses their path, even an inconsequential meme. Does it make them feel superior? Safer, perhaps? Clearly, there must be a lot of pain there.

Mindfulness. Mindfulness, mindfulness, mindfulness! Obviously that's the message I'm learning from this congregation exercise. "Walk a mile in their shoes." Learned it in Sunday School, learned it in Girl Scouts, being taught it again as I hurtle toward retirement. 

 

 

 

Compassion Challenge -- Day 13

I'm encouraged to participate in this November challenge with my church congregation.

Inspiring Compassion: The 30 Day Compassion Challenge. 30 days to explore the topic of compassion: Mindfulness, Compassion for Friends & Family, Self-Compassion, Compassion for All, Compassion for Our Planet.

Saturday, I used Facebook for good.

First, I had lunch with Nancy and her husband. It was the first time I'd seen them since July! We had a lot to catch up and were blabbing when Nancy noticed someone outside of the window. A woman had taken a fall getting into her car, and her family was slow to help her onto feet. Nancy was up like a shot and within moments was out there, hands on her knees, eyes locked onto the woman's. With her first aid training, she ascertained that the biggest problem wasn't her leg but the bump to her head. Nancy recommended they call paramedics and let the professionals decide next steps. It was a bravura performance! (Plus, as he watched through the glass, her husband told me, admiringly, "Nancy has the best heart!" I melted.)

When I got home, I went on Facebook to thank Nancy for meeting me for lunch, and to share her heroics. Why not? The lady did a good thing. Why not let our mutual social media friends in on it? Nancy should know how special she was this afternoon.

In between loads of laundry, I picked up my mail and there -- a week early -- was my gift from my Cousin Rose. She never forgets! I know she's on the road (I believe she's visiting her brother in Michigan) but she checks Facebook on her phone. I thought about what I wrote in Saturday 9 about my friend Mindy -- she's not always sensitive to follow ups and that can feel crappy. So I used Facebook to let Rose that the gift arrived, safe and sound.

Mindfulness. I put myself in other people's shoes again. I hope I'll continue to do this after the month, and this challenge, are over.

 

Sunday Stealing

STOLEN FROM NED THE DUCK

Name Your Favorite…

    Place: Chicago's Loop. I just began commuting downtown again after 19 months of work-from-home. It's exciting to be back.

    Color: Cubbie blue. Here's a picture of the Chicago River, dyed Cubbie blue to celebrate the 2016 World Series.

 

    Smell: Cinnamon. At least I think it's still my favorite. I had covid last year, right around this time, and I'm very lucky that my case, while long lasting, was mild and I was never in danger of dying. It was not without consequence, though. Example: my sense of smell is forever changed. Scents I was neutral to before, like lavender and vanilla, are now more vivid. That's good. Scents I once liked, like citrus, now smell vile. That's bad. The smell thing: it's a constant, ongoing reminder of this pandemic.

    Magazine: Vanity Fare

    Texture: Do I have a favorite texture? I don't think so.

    Thing to do when bored: Nap.

    Precious stone: Sapphire. Not that I own one.

    Animal: Cat

    Time in history: 1960s, for the feeling that we were changing and as a nation could do anything.

    Font: Something san serif

    Sound: Cat purr

    Fruit: A toss up between apple and peach

    Vegetable: I'm going through a potato phase. Hash-browned, french fried or mashed.

    Store/shop: Target

    Quote:

 
    Historical figure(s): Two very different people whose lives intersected.

Fascinating individually & together

    Letter: Do I have a favorite letter? I don't think so.

    Memory: First one that comes to mind is sailing through the air on the swing my grandpa built in his backyard.

    Dessert: Chocolate cake with chocolate frosting. And a glass of milk, please.

    Candy: Right now I'm kind of craving an Almond Joy bar.

    Restaurant: My local coffee shop. Best breakfasts in town.

    Language: I only speak English.

    Thing to learn about: What I can accomplish

    Thing about yourself: I'm a good friend

Better each day

Connie had dental work on Friday: a tooth extraction and something I don't quite understand with her gum/top lip. I brought her home Friday night and she was sooooo full of anesthesia and pain killers. Her gait was so wobbly she literally fell into her water bowl. She was confused and all she wanted to do was hide under the bed.

I woke up Saturday and she was beside me on top of the bed. My waking disturbed her and she continued behaving oddly, just a different kind of oddly. She mewed a bit, conversationally, walked around the apartment as if to reassure herself everything is where it should be, and back under the bed. It was an improvement.

Connie on the Cubbie throw last spring

I was out all day Saturday. When I got home, I did laundry and paid bills. The temperature had dipped and, when I got ready for bed, I got out the Cubbie throw. Connie has always loved the Cubbie throw and regarded it as her good friend. Seeing it again, feeling it under her paws again, after six months. helped shake her out of her stupor. Purring, flipping back and forth, she was more like her old self.

She still hasn't eaten anything or even drank water (at least not in front of me). She's interested in what Roy Hobbs is up to, but not prepared to participate in any of his games. So she's still not well.

But Saturday night was better than Friday night, and I predict Sunday will be better yet.

Thank God! I was so, so worried about her.

Saturday 9

Without You (1972)

Unfamiliar with this week's song. Hear it here.

1) Nilsson sings that he can't forget this evening. Did anything happen this evening (or last night, if you're answering during the day) that you expect you'll recall for a long time? As I write this Friday evening, I just brought my Connie Cat home from the vet. She had a tooth pulled this morning. She's still all dopey and dilated. If her recovery from this routine procedure is successful, I'll likely never think of it again. But if it isn't? Oh, sometimes it's not fun being a fur mom.

2) In the 1960s, he worked in a very "un-rock-star" job: computer programmer in a bank. Looking over your career, have you more often worked in or out of an office setting? Always in an office.

 

3) He fibbed to get the job, telling the bank he'd graduated from high school when in reality, he was a drop out. Have you ever fudged a fact on your resume? No. I'd never do that. A job is like a relationship. The employer and employee have to be straight with one another.

4) The bank found out the truth but was so pleased with Nilsson's personality and performance they kept him on. Tell us about a friend or loved one's misbehavior that you have overlooked. My friend Mindy sees herself as the kindest, most empathetic person in the world. She really means to be. But she's not. She likes getting her way too-too much and is lazy about returning phone calls and honoring commitments. I don't bust her on this, though, because it would break her heart. She truly does believe she's the most sensitive person any of us knows.

5) Before finding success as a singer, Nilsson was a songwriter. He composed "Cuddly Toy," recorded by the Monkees. Do you have a favorite Monkees song? Not only one of my favorite Monkees songs, one of all my all-time favorite records.

 

 

 

6) In 1976 Nilsson married Una O'Keeffe. They met in a New York restaurant, where she was a waitress. He asked her about her accent -- she was from Dublin -- and a romance ensued. While the waitress and the rock star seemed like an unlikely couple, they remained together until his death in 1994 and had six children. Do you know how your parents (or grandparents) met? My dad was a mechanic, working on this lady's car and he completely charmed her. No easy feat, because the lady could be intimidating. Anyway, she asked the mechanic if he had a girlfriend, because her daughter had recently broken up with her boyfriend. My dad invited the lady's daughter to a party at his place that weekend. Unfortunately, he was picking up ice when she arrived and, in his absence, she took an immediate dislike to his drunk and rowdy friends. She ran out and was walking home when he caught up with her. And so it was on the street, with my dad calling to her from a rolled-down car window as she stormed down the sidewalk, that my parents first met.

 

7) Nilsson was a night owl and found he felt most creative late at night, right before he fell asleep. When are you at your best: morning, noon or night? Late afternoon or late night.

8) In 1972, the year "Without You" was a hit, Alice Clark Browne made history as the first African American aerialist to perform with Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus. Did you ever attend the circus? My parents took us to see the Shrine Circus a couple times. I liked it better in theory than practice. They had three rings and I didn't know what I should be looking at. I liked the horses but hated the clowns and the cotton candy left my hands all sticky.

 
9) Random question -- Think about last week. Would you prefer this week to be more exciting, or more boring? LESS! This week brought a great deal of stress.

 

Compassion Challenge -- Day 11

I'm encouraged to participate in this November challenge with my church congregation.

Inspiring Compassion: The 30 Day Compassion Challenge. 30 days to explore the topic of compassion: Mindfulness, Compassion for Friends & Family, Self-Compassion, Compassion for All, Compassion for Our Planet.

I forget that I'm not the only one feeling stress right now. My art director (she who frequently annoys me) and I go through every work day in double harness. While it's true that she doesn't accept the same level of responsibility as I do, she does have to crank out a great deal of work on the same unreasonable timeline as I do.

I often forget how hard she works. That's wrong.

So Thursday, I celebrated it. I told her how happy I was for her when, during a Zoom meeting, her photo selection was praised by our client and I saw the look of pleasure spread across her face. I said I was glad she enjoyed a job well done. Small moments like this cost nothing. I should remember to share like this more often.

MIndfulness. I should put myself in other people's shoes more often.