A nice Saturday

The weather was warm (70º) and dry. I slept in, had a nice big coffee shop brunch, enjoying french toast and my Mary Lincoln book. Did a little shopping, saving with my CVS coupon. And finished the day with a rare Saturday Meet Up.

I haven't seen What's Up, Doc? in years. Decades, probably. It was wonderful to see it again, and I enjoyed seeing it in an appreciative crowd. Being a big Streisand fan, I was happy to hear the kudos for her, and the "she's so pretty!" comments. Ryan O'Neal was very pretty, too, in those days. Not as talented as Babs, but definitely gorgeous. Made me sad for the way his life and career  have worked out. It was nice to see fellow-movie lovers Rebecca and Martha again.

I think the best Saturdays include nothing but breakfast, books, baseball (more in a moment) and movies.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: I'll Be There for You (1995)
 
1) This song begins with, "So no one told you life was gonna be this way …" What do you wish you knew five years ago about your life now? "Oh, Gal, the weight you're gaining so easily is not going to be easy to take off!"

2) This is, of course, the theme from Friends, which is frequently shown back-to-back on TVLand and TBS. Have you ever "binge-watched" a show, catching episode after episode? NCIS, Law & Order, Will & Grace, Friends ... I don't rent them from Netflix, but if a network runs a marathon, I often watch.

3) On the show, Monica and Rachel shared a beautiful 2BR/2BA Soho apartment with a private balcony. It's estimated that such a pad would cost at least $3500/month in today's real-life New York. Describe your dream home. The Palmolive Building on Michigan Avenue. It's a beautiful, lovingly restored art deco building and that light you see is called The Lindbergh Beacon. It dates back to the 1930s when it helped pilots fly into Chicago from over the Lake. Of course with today's air traffic controllers it's no longer necessary, but it still shines every night, rotating a full 360º.

4) Of the six main characters, only Chandler was an only child. Do you have any siblings? Two sisters. I'm the middle one.

5) Gunther was the barista at Central Perk, the coffee shop where the Friends hung out. He had an ongoing, unrequited love for Rachel. Are you crushing on anyone right now? Does he/she know? Yes. I don't know.

6) Currently Matt ("Joey") LeBlanc stars in the Showtime series Episodes, playing a character named Matt LeBlanc. If there was going to be series

based on your life, who would play you? Carrie Fisher. We're very nearly the same age and have similar senses of humor. (Though my writing isn't as sharp as hers, and my life isn't as dramatic as hers, nor are my demons as fierce.)

7) Courtney Cox, who portrayed Monica, has the Twitter handle @CourtneyCox and has 628,000 followers. What was your last tweet? Gwyneth Paltrow for the Polly Bergen part. Then she and Nicky could consciously uncouple. Some classic movie fans and I were casting our own modern-day remake of an old movie called Move Over, Darling (itself a remake of My Favorite Wife).

8) The creators of Friends were massive soap opera fans. They named their characters after recurring characters on All My Children and had Joey appear on Days of Our Lives. Have you ever been hooked on a daytime drama? I watched AMC off and on throughout its run. I loved Dark Shadows when I was a kid.

9) The band who performed this song, The Rembrandts, took their name from the famous Dutch painter. Can you see any artwork from where you're sitting right now? Tell us about it (and yes, a school painting by your 7-year-old nephew counts). A pen-and-ink of San Francisco's Lombard Street.

Oy!

We have a new client. She's about 35, but has only been in marketing about three years. Most of her career has been spent in creative services -- design, specifically.

I've had two meetings with her, both regarding the same relatively minor project. And in both meetings she acted more like a designer than a marketer, trying to tell us how to do our job (therefore not doing hers).

I'm trying to see this as newbie behavior. She's trying to establish her credentials with us and impress us. Or maybe because the job is a bit more complex than she expected it to be, she returns to the area where she's most comfortable -- which is creative rather than marketing.

Also, when Mad Men isn't on and mentioning our agency every week, I forget how respected and venerable we are. I mean, I'm here, part of the sausage making process, so I'm not impressed with us. But I imagine that a Michigan Avenue agency with our reputation could be intimidating.

At any rate, she makes me tired.

I dearly hope that she will calm down and come to know and trust us. To let us add value and make her job easier.

I'm trying not to be paranoid -- that somehow our Fortune 500 Company client didn't hire her because they are displeased with my work and want to bring my projects in house under her tutelage. When I'm not freaking out, I realize that's unlikely. But possible.

Another reason why I'm tired.

Image courtesy of Victor Habbick/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I Want Wednesday

I want this week to be over. Saturday our classic movie group is meeting for What's Up, Doc, a screwball comedy I haven't seen in decades. The weather is supposed to be sunny and warm(er) Saturday, too.

I want carefree and happy!

Look! The glass is half full!

Yes, something very bad happened to me. It continued to hurt me and bedevil me throughout my life at the most unexpected times. And no, I didn't get the support I needed and deserved from my mother and sisters.

This has to be acknowledged. We're only as sick as our secrets, and this one was a doozy.

On the other hand, after this week, much of it will be OVER. The old fart will be, literally, dead and buried. I'll never have to see at his face. I can think of no reason why his name will come up in any context, ever again. This is an enormous relief.

And, since he managed to die at a time when I can't leave town as I'd planned, I suddenly have quite a cache of American Airlines miles I can use. So this October's trip to Los Angeles? The flight will be free, thankyouverymuch.

I've gotten the support I craved as kid now, and now I'm very grateful for it. Those of you who posted your support on Sunday's post have no idea how much your words meant to me. My aunt from the other side of the family wrote that she wishes she could fly in for "the funeral of that old bastard" so she can "practice her grave dancing." And my oldest friend, an abuse survivor herself, and I talked a lot on Sunday night. It's good to have people in your corner!

And I got through it. I wonder how much this has colored my relationships with men, but at this point it's only an intellectual pursuit. It doesn't really matter how I got through or what it cost me, I got through.

I'm tougher than I give myself credit for.

Teaser Tuesday

Here's how to play this meme.

• Grab your current read
• Open to a random page
• Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
• BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)
• Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teasers!

From Mary: A Novel by Janis Cook Newman. It's the fictional autobiography of Mary Lincoln. Here she is on page 158, lobbying Abe to bring her along when he moves to Washington as an Illinois Congressman.

 

"I want to see how they treat you in Washington City. Once they come to learn what you are."

 

"And what is that?" he asked as the baby tugged upon his ears.

"Noble," I told him.

My husband held up his youngest son. "And I am to refuse the heart's desire of someone who believes that of me?" he asked Eddie.

 

Of course he did

My molester died this morning. This means that relatives will be coming in from Los Angeles and Tampa to honor his pervy old ass.

I had a feeling this was coming. I've been checking my voicemail during the day from work, expecting to get the word. I imagined that then I would use the American Airlines frequent flier miles I have been hoarding to take a flight to Memphis. I thought it would be nice to absent myself by spending a few days with The King. There are motels within walking distance from Graceland and I thought it would be a great distraction from the ugliness at hand.

But the old fart died on a Sunday when I'm covering for a vacationing coworker and when I'm preparing to meet a new client for the first time. So no, I can't take a few days off right now.

Isn't that just like him? Messing with me to the last.

Circumstances can stop me from escaping town but they can't force me to celebrate my molester as the patriarch and pious congregant the family likes to think he is.

So I'm no longer answering my landline and am insisting to anyone who calls my cell or emails/texts that I'm out of town. Besides, I just may be gone for real on Thursday or Friday.

Once he's planted, this will all be over. Not only can he no longer harass me, and I will no longer have to keep his secret.

I got the news as I was getting into the shower. I felt cleansed in so many ways.

Sunday Stealing

The For Old Times' Sake Meme

When was the last time you swam in a pool? At Christmastime, when I was in Key West. It was small but very pretty.

Do you like to party? Not so much anymore. I have to be social and on all day at work, and when I get home I want to recharge with Alone Time.

Describe the shirt you're wearing? Key West again. A nightshirt featuring Robert the Haunted Doll.

What is one feature film that you don't like? Raiders of the Lost Ark. I don't hate it, I just don't like it.

Would people describe you as happy? Most of the time.

Sleep with or without clothes on? Depends on the weather and where I am.

Does it bother you if people swear around you? No

Do you prefer Wednesdays or Thursdays? Thursday, I suppose. But it's not a strong preference.

Like to travel? Yes. I'm going to Los Angeles in October, Las Vegas in December and Key West (third mention this post!) in December.

Think you're attractive? I suppose. I'm not pretty, but I can be cute.

Are or were you a good student? I could be, when I cared. I get more jacked about learning things now then I did in a school setting.

Are you currently happy? At this moment? Except for a scratchy throat, yes.

Colored or black-and-white photo? Depends

Do you consider yourself the life of the party? No

Do you drink? Yes

Do you make fun of people? Yes

Do you think dreams eventually come true? If they're supposed to

Favorite fictional character? Jo from Little Women

Go to the movies or rent? I love the experience of going to the movies

Have you ever moved? Yes. I hate it.

Have you ever stolen anything? No

How's the weather right now? Unseasonably chilly

Last time you cut your hair? I've never cut my own hair. But I had a hair cut yesterday.

Last person you talked to on the phone? I called a cab

Last time you showered? This morning.

Loud or soft music? Loud

McDonalds or Burger King? I like them both.

Night or day? For what?

Number of pillows? Two

Piano or guitar? I can't play either

Current longing? To be in better shape and feel more fit

Current disappointment? I'm upset with my best friend. He's been unemployed for 20 months now and just got back from another family vacation. He has traveled more with no income than most people do with jobs. I know this means his wife has to have a job. Yet he hasn't mentioned anything about it! I'm disappointed in him that he seems to feel embarrassed about his family's work situation. I mean, it's just ME. He should know that the things I admire about him have nothing to do with whether or not he's the breadwinner. (Straight men are so hard to figure out.)

Current annoyance? The aforementioned scratchy throat.

Last thing you ate? A bowl of cereal.

Last thing you bought? A roll of Bounty paper towels.

Pick a lyric, any lyric or a song... "So we are history, your shadow covers me, the sky above is ablaze!"



Pick a movie quote... "Think you used enough dynamite there, Butch?"

So glad we had lunch

My nephew and I spent a couple hours together over pizza and he filled me in on his 8th grade life.

He didn't mention the class trip to Washington DC, which I know he dearly wanted to go on but can't afford. He's enthusiastic about the two traditional events that await him before graduation -- a museum trip to downtown Chicago and a trip to Six Flags Great America.

For me, the big news is that he's no longer sure he wants to be an author. He wants to teach. "Kids my own age or younger." I'm glad to hear this because I almost ordered him a wallet for graduation that said, "You are this close to be written out of my novel."

We also discussed our summer outing. My nephew wants to return to The Taste of Chicago. I'm not surprised because the boy does love to eat!

He's a good kid, a sweet kid. I enjoyed our time together.

My Mom Would Like This

I was in my old hometown today for my haircut and just happened to find myself passing my mother's house. A realtor was on the front sidewalk, talking to a young a couple. I can't say for sure, because my cab was moving at a pretty fast clip, but I think the woman was pregnant.

My mother loved that house so much. It's a good-sized ranch within walking distance to both public and parochial grade schools, and the yard I spent my girlhood playing in was her pride and joy. It would make her happy to see a young family grow there.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Can't Buy Me Love (1964)

50 years ago this week, The Beatles made history with this song (hear it here). They became the first and only act in history to hold all 5 of the top slots in the Billboard Hot 100.

1) In this song, Beatle Paul offers to buy his girl a diamond ring. Do you wear rings? I have to, because the ring helps me tell my left from my right. (Yes, I am that pathetic. You never want me as your navigator.) My current favorite is lotus blossoms etched on a silver band.

2) This song was written by boyhood friends John Lennon and Paul McCartney, who went on to become the most successful songwriters of the 20th century. Tell us about  your best friend from "the old neighborhood." Do you know where he or she is today? Yes. The woman I imaginatively refer to on this blog as "my oldest friend" has been in my life since Kindergarten. We communicate (email/phone) several times a week and are spending my birthday together in Vegas this November. I have lots of decades-long friendships. They come easily to me. I'm lucky that way.

3) The Ed Sullivan Theater, where the Beatles first performed to a mass American audience, is now the home of The Late Show with David Letterman. Do you have a favorite late night talk show? I love those Comedy Central boys. 

4) In 1964, when this song became #1, one of top TV shows was My Favorite Martian. Do you believe in life on other planets? Intellectually, yes. It just makes sense. But I don't spend much time thinking about it or imagining what they might look like.

5) In those days, homes had rotary dial phones, often affixed to the wall, with the receiver always tethered by a curly cord. Does your home still have a landline phone? Yes.

6) 1964 was the year GI Joe first appeared on toy shelves. Tell us about one of your favorite childhood toys. My Lassie dog, who looked much like this before I lavished her with so much attention and affection. She's up in my closet somewhere. I can't part with her.

7) Ringo was the first Beatle to become a grandfather. His granddaughter, Tatia, is now a rock musician. If you were to follow your grandfather into his chosen profession, what would you be doing now? I don't know what his job title was, but my grandpa worked at ElectroMotive Diesel for decades. He serviced engine parts, and was very proud of his prowess. When he finally retired, he spent hours on end at his tool bench or repairing things at his house and at ours. He loved to tinker!

8) Paul McCartney admits he enjoys watching MasterChef. What show do you go out of your way to catch? Thinking of talkshow hosts, I really enjoy seeing the old master again on Carson on TCM, hosted by Conan O'Brien. The current run ended on March 31, but I suspect TCM will show more again this summer.

9) The paparazzi has often caught Paul pedaling a bike around Martha's Vineyard. What's your favorite form of exercise? I enjoy pedaling my little heart out on the stationery bike. My ankle has been giving me trouble lately -- I think perhaps the boots I wore way, way too often this snowy winter didn't provide the right support -- so I've been shying away from the treadmill.

Dinner with a real ROMEO

Thursday night I picked up a lovely salad at the local deli and met Robert, a charming older gentleman from church. He's one of the volunteers who contacts each of the members about what we like about the congregation, what we don't like … and try to get us to pledge more for the 2014-2015 year.

(Good luck with that, Robert. I'm not at all happy about the way the capital campaign has been handled and I'm not going to support it.)

Despite how I feel about this fundraising push, I was very happy to talk with Robert. He was such a sweet, spirited soul! He invited me to sit with him and his wife this Sunday, and told me that he and his retiree lunch buddies refer to themselves as ROMEOs (Really Old Men Eating Out). I think that's charming.

"We're gonna cheer, and boo, and raise a hullaballoo ..."

Opening Day at Wrigley Field is underway. All is right in this gal's world.

And so I began

I had my first private training session last night, and I think it went well. He went very slowly with me and I'm not sore today. But I did work up a sweat and even did 2 planks, and held each one for 30 seconds -- a feat I truly didn't think was possible. It's my personal goal to be able to do 10 planks instead of 2.

I needed to feel like I had a win, and my trainer Dwayne helped me get one. I think signing up for these sessions was a good choice for me.

Why I'm scared

I work in Chicago's Loop day in/day out. Guns are a terrible problem in my city. It's always top of mind. One thing that gun rights advocates like to say is that if more law-abiding Chicagoans carried guns, there would be fewer shootings.

I've always felt that if more law-abiding citizens carried guns, we're more likely to be caught in cross fire.

Yesterday there was a second shooting at Ft. Hood. There are a lot of guns, carried in plain sight, on an army base. They didn't deter this gunman. The results are a tragedy.

I fear handguns and don't believe they solve anything.

Oh, break my heart!

Within the past five days or so I've seen two little kids, all duded up for spring, and they really were adorable.

The first, a girl, was at the mall getting her photo taken with the Easter Bunny. Now I never was a big believer in the Bunny, so I was surprised to see the awe with which she approached the giant leporidae. Then, when she got close to his white wicker throne, she just hugged his legs. It was so sweet. The photographer helped her into The Bunny's lap and spread her full skirt around her. She didn't care. She was just gazing at her beloved Bunny.

The second was a boy, crossing the street, clutching his mother's hand. They both looked very solemn, and he was dressed like an itty-bitty version of a GQ Justin Timberlake photo shoot. That's why I find boys' dress clothes so touching. I mean, girls' clothes are a separate animal altogether -- with more flourishes and ruffles, etc., than a woman's. But boys' clothes are just menswear shrunk down. It's so cute.

I don't like it. No, not one bit.

I have referred to this office in the past as "The Clown Car." It's four of us in one small enclosed space, and it reminds me of that stunt in the circus when clown after clown piles out of the car.

Lately it's felt more like a holdover from the phonebooth stuffing craze of the late 1950s.

No matter which analogy I use, it leaves me exhausted.

One of my coworkers is always on the phone, whispering to her friends and family. I don't mind that. It's none of my business what she does or who she speaks to. It's just that she's so dramatic about being discreet that it's not discreet, and there's something sibilant about her whispered s's that just cuts through any ambient noise and makes my skin crawl a little.

Another of my coworkers can be very negative* and really doesn't speak to anyone but me. Literally. If I'm not in he doesn't talk to the other two. There's one of our merry band of four that he especially shuns because he's thinks that gentleman is stupid. This makes me feel bad, so I feel compelled to overcompensate by being especially blabby and inclusive. I feel responsible for keeping the mood up.

It's a lot, you know? I have to be engaged, on display, all day every day. I can't dig in there with a tissue, pick my teeth or fix my bra, no matter how surreptitiously, because someone is always within a yard from me. Someone can always see me or hear me. And there's always someone I can reach out and touch ... whether I want to or not.

And it weighs on me. To the point that when I leave here, I don't care if I see or speak to anyone.

I feel bad complaining about this, after complaining about not wanting to lose my job, but it's an issue in my life right now and this blog is all about reflecting who I am on any given day.

*Though it must be said he's always fair to and supportive of me.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

To play along, just answer the following three questions ...

• What are you currently reading? Mary by Janis Cooke Newman. Massive -- 600+ pages -- and fascinating. This is Mary Lincoln's fictional autobiography and I am enjoying it immensely. It begins in the looney bin in Batavia, Illinois, where she was placed at the instigation of her only remaining son. I've read my fair share about the first woman in our history to have the title of First Lady, and so far the settings and narrative seem historically accurate. Her voice? Historical fiction is always dangerous in this regard, but I like thinking this is what Mary was really like: loyal, tempestuous, smart, and frighteningly fragile. This lady withstood a staggering amount of loss in her life -- beginning with the death of her mother when she was 6 -- and there's no disputing that life got the better of her. Unlike the First Lady shown here, with whom she shared many similarities, Mary simply wasn't tough enough to play the hand life dealt her.

 

• What did you recently finish reading? A fascinating book called  After Visiting Friends by Michael Haney. As I read it, I kept remembering the adage: "We're only as sick as our secrets." Quick overview: A journalist wants to know the truth about his father died many years ago at the young age of 35. It's about much more than that, though. It's about family -- what we share and what we hide.

• What do you think you’ll read next? I don't know.

To see how others responded, click here.

Sunday Stealing

The 20Q Meme

1. When you buy a greetings card are the words or the picture more important to you? Words


2. What's your favorite kind of cake? Carrot


3. Do you ever make gifts for people, if so what, or do you buy them?  Usually store bought


4. You are chosen to have lunch with the President. The condition is you only get to ask one question. What do you ask? "How do you rise above all the hateful, partisan, bullshit criticism you get?"


5. Which do you dislike most: pop-up ads or spam email? Pop ups

6. What was the best party you've ever been to? My friend John's 40th was pretty cool


7. Which is worse, being in a place that is too loud, or too quiet? Too quiet. It's harder to lose yourself.


8. You are offered an envelope that you know contains $50. You are then told that you may either keep it or exchange it for another envelope that may contain $500 or may be empty. Do you keep the first envelope, or do you take your chances with the second? Well, Monty Hall, I'll go for the second envelope.


9. Do you wish cellphone etiquette was a required class upon purchasing one? No.


10. What's the most messed up food combination that you've had that was actually good? Now I didn't think this was messed up, but my mom always cringed when I ordered it: butternut squash ravioli

11. What's one of your most random pet peeves (something that annoys you)? When the toilet paper is hung wrong.


12. When is the last time you had home cooking? Last week when I made myself a hot dog with a side order of corn.

13. If you could be a fictional character from a book who would you choose? Jo from Little Women


14. If you could be in a television sit-com, which would you choose? Friends


15. If you could be any animal or creature for one day, what would it be?  I'd love to hang around as a cat with my cats for a day. I think it would make me a better cat mom.

16. What's your favorite girl's name? Michelle

17. What's your favorite boy's name? Michael

18. What's your supermarket of choice? Trader Joe's


19. If you were to attend a costume party tonight, what or whom would you go as? Minnie Mouse. Because I think I still the costume in the closet somewhere.


20. What is your concession stand must-have at the movies? I like Sno-Caps

March Challenge -- Day 29

Day 29 --Describe your camera/device. Do you take many pictures?

Kodak M530. It's a fine little digital camera. I'm happy with it. It fits easily into my purse and it's easy to focus. Any personal photos you've seen on this blog have been taken with it.

Play the March Challenge along with Kwizgiver.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Too Close (2011)

Unfamiliar with this week's song? Hear it here.

1) This song is about a friendship that turned romantic ... and it doesn't end happily. Have you ever crossed that line with a friend? If so, how did it work out? This has never happened to me. I'm either sexually attracted to a guy or I'm not, it's never just snuck up on me within a friendship. Though I think the idea is romantic and hope that anyone this has happened to lives happily ever after.

2) When he was a kid, this week's singer, Alex Clare, listened to his dad's Stevie Wonder records. When you were in 7th/8th grades, what music were you into? Incredibly embarrassing bubblegum. I should be ashamed to post this, but I'll do it anyway. Enjoy the fringed shirt/tight black pant combo and swivel hip dance moves.





3) "Too Close" has been featured on the TV show, The Vampire Diaries. Do you enjoy shows/books/movies about the supernatural? Nope

4) Some of Alex Clare's tour dates were sponsored by Bud Light. Do you like beer? I drink less beer than I used to, but there are times when a light beer hits the spot.

5) Mr. Clare trained to be a chef, just in case the music thing didn't work out. Are you a good cook? No.


6) Crazy Sam is forever running out of mayo because she slathers it on her sandwiches. What is currently on your grocery list? Paper towels are a staple for me. And I think I'll pick up a bag of those cute little mandarin oranges from Trader Joe's.

7) Where are you most likely to find spare change -- between the sofa cushions, in your jeans as you toss them into the washer, or under the floor mat of your car? Sofa.

8) How did you spend your Friday night -- working late, hanging out with friends, or just enjoying a quiet night at home? I'm cocooning. I work in an "open office space" -- aka a clown car -- with four of us sharing one small space. When I get away from work, it's my goal to not speak to anyone.

9) Do you use Pinterest? Every once in a while. I'm liking Houzz more. It's all about interior design and I'm working on my bathroom.

March Challenge -- Day 28

Day 28 --Describe your glasses or sunglasses.

I'll go with sunglasses, because they're more fun. They're my weakness and I have too, too many pairs. I'm going to take a few to Goodwill tomorrow, as a matter of fact.

But not these. These are my current favorites. Polo by Ralph Lauren. Picked them up in the Tampa airport en route to Key West. The pair I'd been wearing when I got on the plane at O'Hare broke. What a happy accident that turned out to be! The squarish lenses are a nice contrast to my round face and the frames feel sturdy but not heavy. They go with everything.

Now I just hope I don't leave them on the el. 

Play the March Challenge along with Kwizgiver.

My bathroom lights have arrived!

Now all I need is the new sink, the new faucets, the new medicine chest, the new tiles around the tub, and the new paintjob for the walls.

OK, what's in front of me is daunting, but this is a start!

March Challenge -- Day 27

Day 27 --What's in your wallet?

 

From memory: Wallet, hairbrush, makeup bag, Franklin Planner, Petco and CVS coupons, thumb drive, two pairs of glasses (prescription and reading), contact lens solution, contact lens case, pens, Pepto Bismol tablets, a few emergency tablets in case I get a migraine.

Play the March Challenge along with Kwizgiver.

Change Is in the Air

"There's a change in the weather, there's a change in the sea. So from now on they'll be a change in me."

I'm tired of being fat and sloppy and broke. So I asked for a fitness assessment at LA Fitness, where I try to work out 3x/week ... but haven't been. And when I do work out, I obviously don't push myself hard enough.

The assessment was humbling. I'm in terrible shape and a health club is populated by the strong and the skinny. I get out of breath easily. I'm not flexible.

But this emphasized how much I need to do. Over the last 20 years I have gained ... gulp ... 80 lbs. Thirty of those pounds have been put on over the last 8 years. The trainer thought it was reasonable for me to expect to lose 35 over the next year. I'd be happy to lose 5!

OK, I said, let's get started. Two 45-min. sessions/week for ... I don't remember how long. My mind went to the happy place when I saw the dollar amount. NO WAY CAN I AFFORD THIS!

Which I told him. I was also feeling bad that they didn't let me know how high the fees were before I embarrassed myself waddling through the fitness assessment.

OK, how about one 30-min session/week (preceded by 30 mins. of cardio warm up on my own) for about $60/session? That seemed reasonable. Expensive enough to force me to show up, but affordable. I mean, this is my health we're talking about here. I'm worth $60/week.

But not $60/week for 28 weeks. That's $240/month for 6 months ... and it's a binding contract. On the one hand, my paid-for sessions never expire. On the other hand, if I lose my job between now and October, I'm still on the hook for $240/month.

After thinking about it overnight, I decided I simply can't do it. I'll go back to my local health club. I really didn't like the trainer I tried in 2009, but that was 5 years ago and she doesn't work there anymore. The thing is, that gym is in my neighborhood and LA Fitness is downtown, near work, and easier for me to get to.

But I'm tired of weighing more than Abraham Lincoln did, so I called and set up an appt. with a new, more affordable local trainer for Sunday afternoon.

Then guess what! LA Fitness called back. They just now began offering a new 12-week program!* $290/month for three months. I sign the paperwork next week and then we'll get started.

Next up: straightening out that bog of paperwork on my dining room table.

I can do this. I have to do this. Because I'm the only one who can!

*Yeah, I don't believe it, either. The $870 option was probably always available but they didn't want to offer it until they were sure I wouldn't take the $1440 plan.

March Challenge -- Day 26

Day 26 --What makes you smile?

Joey, my cat. He's old and fat and clumsy. But he has such a dear heart. I smile when I think of how he purrs at mealtime, or presses himself beside me on the sofa or loves napping with the afternoon sun on his tummy. Joey is all about enjoying the moment. I could learn from him!

Play the March Challenge along with Kwizgiver.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

To play along, just answer the following three questions ...

• What are you currently reading? Mary by Janis Cooke Newman. I just picked it up this morning, so I don't have anything to say first hand. But here's what B&N says: "An engrossing novel about Mary Todd Lincoln — one of history’s most misunderstood and enigmatic women. Writing from Bellevue asylum — where the shrieks of the other inmates keep her awake at night — a famous widow can finally share the story of her life in her own words."

 

• What did you recently finish reading?  I can't say enough wonderful things about  After Visiting Friends by Michael Haney. Quick overview: A journalist wants to know the truth about his father died many years ago at the young age of 35. That doesn't do it justice. This memoir is about the shadow our parents cast over our lives, it's about discovery and forgiveness, it's about facing the past so we can get beyond it. It's beautifully written, a valentine to the Chicago of recent past. Get it and read it!

• What do you think you’ll read next? I don't know.

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