Sigh

I've long been a little in love with Joe DiMaggio. Like Baryshnikov, he was grace in motion. Look at that swing! I remember seeing a documentary about Joltin' Joe that showed him at a charity event, raising money by bowling with a massive round of gouda. He made even that look classy.

Joltin' Joe is on the news again this summer, as baseball fans observe the 75th anniversary of his streak. He hit in every damn game for nearly two months, 56 games in all. It's considered baseball's unbreakable record.

In 1998, Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire chased one another in an exciting home run derby. I thought we Cub fans, along with the rest of the country, were crazy into it. The attention Sosa and McGwire got with nothing compared to the white hot light on Joe 75 years ago. A lot of it had to do with New York then, as now, being the world's media center. I think more of it had to with Joe. He was a real hero, as opposed to those two juicers.

During The Streak, his every swing was documented ... from the diamond!

After his career was over, he became famous as the man who really loved Her. The Marilyn Monroe legend is filled with tales of Dimaggio's devotion, even after she left him. One of the most enduring and harrowing has to do with Marilyn's four days at Payne-Whitney. Monroe believed her psychiatrist was admitting her to a rest home. Instead, she found herself on a cot in a psych ward. It's possible that, in long-ago 1961, a psych ward was the best option available to this very troubled woman. But that doesn't mean it was handled correctly. Marilyn was terrified, her anxiety escalated and burst through the roof. Her doctor was unavailable. Her close friend and mentor, Lee Strasburg, tried to help but was unsuccessful. She got word to Joe, who was still one of the most powerful men in New York.

He whisked her away after Payne Whitney

By that time, they were divorced. She also remarried and divorced Arthur Miller and had high-profile affairs with Yves Montand and Frank Sinatra. And yet, Joe was there for her. He warned hospital staff that he was coming to get "his wife" at the end of the day and she'd better be ready to come "home" when he arrived. If she wasn't, he threatened to take the hospital apart "brick by brick."

They released her to Joe's care. Just as the coroner would release Marilyn's body to Joe. And every week for more than twenty years, he made sure the Parisian Florist on Sunset Blvd. delivered roses to her grave. According to his friend, Morris Engelberg, who was with him when he died, Dimaggio's last words were, "It's OK. I'll finally get to see Marilyn."

Oh, I've heard all the negatives. I know of his reputation for being cheap. He and his only child were estranged at the time of his death. He could be prickly: if he wasn't introduced as "The World's Greatest Living Yankee," he wouldn't appear (which looks to me like a petty swipe at Mickey Mantle).

But you know what? I don't care. I love Joe Dimaggio. And so, to paraphrase Simon and Garfunkle sang, I'm turning my attention to him this morning.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing

1. What are your current obsessions? I've discovered vintage, black and white gameshows from the 1950s and early 1960s and I'm transfixed. They reveal America on the cusp of a seismic shift that no one saw coming. On the one hand, I love how courtly everyone was, how elegant in jackets and ties and white gloves and jewelry. On the other hand, the racial and gender lines were drawn with a heavy marker. Women referred to themselves as "Mrs. John Smith" instead of "Mary Smith." Hispanics and Asians were invisible, and blacks were domestics or in the military. I feel like warning them that the times, they will soon be a-changing. (They haven't heard of Bob Dylan yet.)



2. What are you listening to? A documentary about DB Cooper.

3. Which item from your wardrobe do you wear most often? Jeans.

4. What are you reading? Wanton's Web. It's a murder mystery set in Chicagoland and I love how careful the author is about the time/place.

5. What’s for dinner? I don't know for sure, but there is a pork chop thawing in the refrigerator.

6. What was the last thing you bought? Dinner to celebrate my friend John's birthday. We had a very nice time.

7. Guilty pleasure? Vodka. (I had too much to drink at dinner and I'm rethinking my choice.)

8. What training did you get and how do you make a living? 13 years of public schooling. And I'm an advertising writer.

9. If you could go back in time, knowing what you know now, and choose a different career path, what would you train to do? I'd like to work with animals in some capacity. Maybe I'd train to be vet tech. 

10. What’s your best time of day? Late morning or late, late at night.

11. Do you like being on a team or are you a solo player? I'm comfortable in both role, but I prefer playing solo.

12. What’s your favorite way to create art? Words.

13. Name three items in your refrigerator: Aforementioned pork chop, 2% milk and Coke.

14. Tell us about your first crush: I only have vague recollections, but my mother used to tell me that, when I was a toddler, I was desperately in love with Little Joe Cartwright on Bonanza. She said if anyone punched or shot him, I was inconsolable, to the point that she had a hard time getting me to bed. At first she blamed my tears on the show being one of the only ones in color and that the action was too vivid for my tender sensibilities. Then she realized I didn't react when anyone else got hurt. Just Little Joe.

15. The first time that I became a boyfriend/girlfriend was with who, when? The summer after I graduated from high school I had my first ongoing relationship with the same boy (as opposed to just dates here and there). His name was David. 

16. Do you remember what you did on your first date? We went to a school dance. 

17. How did you meet your current (or most recent) girlfriend/boyfriend/husband/wife? At work. It's the only place I go!

18. How did your first romantic relationship end? Badly. It was the David from question #15. I feel sorry for him in retrospect. We were so young and of course he wanted to see (and sleep with) other girls before he "settled down." Yet he really liked me and I see now how hard ending it was for him. He tried to be gentle and considerate but I was shattered nevertheless.

19. Do you remember your first kiss? Yes. I was very worried that my braces would spoil everything.

20. What do we still not know about you? I spend a lot of time on my skin care every morning. I accept that I have to age, but I'm trying hard to do it slowly.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Sara Smile (1976)

 

1) This was Hall & Oates' first #1 hit. Can you name another of their popular songs? My favorite: "She's Gone." 

 

 

 

 
2) Darryl Hall and Sara Allen were a couple for 30 years, and he wrote this at the beginning of their long relationship. That makes this a very public love letter. Are you good at writing love letters? Would you rather tell the person how you feel, face to face? Or do you let your actions speak louder than your words? Yes, I can write a good love letter. I just need the right inspiration. Sigh. I once received a "love email" that I carried in my purse for years. He wasn't a particularly skilled writer, but there was so much heart in it. I wonder if there's anything such thing as a "love text." Would it say, "I LUV U" and end with an emoji?

 
3) In the song, Darryl and Sara are waiting for the sunrise. Did you see the sunrise this morning? Or did you sleep in? It's pre-dawn as I answer these questions. I have a feeling I'm going to crash soon, which means missing the sunrise.

 
4) Both Hall & Oates hail from the Philadelphia area. Hall is a native of suburban Pottstown, which was a stop on the Reading/Philadelphia rail line made famous in Monopoly. Do you like playing board games? Sure.

 
5) John Oates grew up a few miles away from Pottstown in North Wales. Decades ago, North Wales' biggest employer was a cigar factory. Do you like the smell of a cigar? For a moment or so, because it reminds me of my favorite grandpa. Then I want to get as far away from the smoke as I can.

 
6) Daryl Hall now hosts a music show, Live from Daryl's House, that you catch  free online. Do you typically watch shows from your computer, pad, phone or TV set? My TV. I tend to multitask, farting around on the laptop when the TV is on.

 

7) Hall & Oates are currently on tour. Are you seeing/have you seen a concert this summer? Nope. I feel kinda bad that I'm going to miss Streisand next month. Seeing an icon like her isn't a concert, it's an event! But money is tight right now and I've got to be smart.

 

8) Daryl and John have been friends for 50 years, even living together at the beginning of their careers when money was tight. Another successful duo of the rock era, Simon & Garfunkle, also met as teens but they forever seem to be feuding. What do you think makes for a lasting friendship/partnership? Acceptance. Giving the other person the benefit of the doubt and remembering we're each doing the best we can. And laughs! Laughter can get us through a lot.

9) Random question:  Are you quick to try new things? As time goes on, less so. I should push myself more.

 

The best fried chicken in Chicago?

Chicago Eater says about Roister's is definitely near the top, and after having dinner there Thursday, I heartily agree. And it wasn't just fried chicken. There was seared chicken and chicken salad. And it was wonderful.

So were the sushi and pasta/clams we shared as an appetizer.

The best thing about the dinner, though, was seeing Barb look so good. Her skin and hair were glowing. And she was on time! In the decades I've been dining with her, she's never been on time before! Retirement definitely agrees with her.

I was surprised to see her flat as a little boy. Yes, of course I knew she'd had a double mastectomy. But I never really thought about her figure before and she does look different. Relaxed, younger and flat. She's having a second reconstructive surgery -- with up to 8 weeks of recovery (!) -- on Monday.

She was full of news. She and John are building a home near Hilton Head. Sprawling, near but on the water and within walking distance of a forest preserve, which will be perfect for walking the dogs.

They are selling their Chicago home in spring. She is moving away.

I'm trying not to feel abandoned. In fact, I literally blurted, "I feel like you are abandoning me." She laughed and told me I'm welcome to stay in their guest room any time.

Again, the difference in our finances hit home. I mean, here I am, sitting in a condo that needs a lot of work. Waiting to hear how much this year's special assessments -- new elevator and bed bug treatments -- will add up to. Despairing my dirty carpet and mottled living room wall and oh! that bathroom! Wishing, wishing I could pay for it all. Wishing, wishing I didn't have so much debt, so I could wouldn't have to worry everylastingly about job security.

Then there's Barb. Her 3BR home is paid for. Their renovated 2BR/2BA condo in Hilton Head is a nice vacation home but simply two small for all their stuff. So now they're building a third place. Both happily retired.

"Compare and despair." That's what my oldest friend's shrink tells her. I must remember that. Barb's life is Barb's life. Mine is my own and will unfold the way it's supposed to.

In the meantime, I must concentrate on how good she looks and feels, and say a little prayer that this reconstructive surgery isn't as painful as her previous one was.

Strangely comforting

The Tribune's wonderful Mary Schmich ran this 50-year-old front page alongside her column, stating, "It's a time of shootings and protests, shouting and hatred, distant wars that are too close to home and everywhere, it seems, fear. But confusion, violence and fear are hardly new, and if they feel more acute in some moments than others, there's no reason to think they're worse than ever now. For a little perspective, take a look at Chicago 50 years ago."

Oh, how I remember the "search for mass slayer." He turned out to be Richard Speck, the bogeyman of my girlhood. On July 14, 1966, he talked his way into a dormitory and killed 8 of its 9 occupants. The 9th, Corazon Amurao ("hidden survivor" referred on the front page), escaped slaughter by hiding under the bed. From the time the murders were discovered till Speck's capture, I was terrified. There was a thick evergreen bush under my bedroom window and I was certain he was hiding there, waiting to kill my family in our sleep.

I also remember the the riots. Race riots. "Police brutality" and "Daley cops" were the phrases that floated into my consciousness (and would become part of the nation's vernacular during the infamous 1968 Democratic Convention).

Add to that the continuing Vietnam War, which was in the newspapers and on TV every night. DMZ (demilitarized zone) was the buzzword of the summer. My favorite uncle was still "in country" that summer, so those stories were disturbing, too.

It was all personal, painful and overwhelming to the 8 year old Gal. Just as the summer of 2016 feels personal, painful and overwhelming to the 58 year old Gal.

But, as Ms. Schmich says at the end of her column, "50 years after that awful July week in Chicago, as we struggle with the problems and fears of the present, it's useful to remember that we're not the first to struggle. We won't be the last. Chicago, always changing, will survive."

I have been there!

I immediately recognized the woodwork

Today Hillary gave an important speech about race and she chose the venue well. Illinois' Old State Capitol is where Lincoln gave his House Divided speech, where Barack Obama announced his run for the Presidency, and then returned to introduce Joe Biden as his running mate.

I have had happy times visiting that venerable Springfield landmark -- as a school girl, on trips with my oldest friend and playing tour guide to my nephew. I was supposed to go last month with John, but his illness prevented it. Hopefully we will try to make the trip in spring 2017.

John -- like all my friends of color -- is 100% with Hillary. In fact, before he checked himself into the hospital in May, he reassured me, only half joking, that he had no intention of dying until he voted for Hillary for President. So I look forward to walking the Old State Capitol halls with him.

The speech was important to me because she named the names. She gave proper respect to the five police officers killed in Dallas -- Brent Thompson, Lorne Ahrens, Patrick Zamarripa, Michael Smith and Michael Krol. She also named Philando Castile, the St. Paul school employee shot to death during a traffic stop.

Most important to me, she remembered to name Laquan McDonald and Sandra Bland. Those two deaths have left a raised bruise on Chicago.

"There is too much violence and hate in our country. Too little trust and common ground. It can feel impossible to have the conversations we need to have to fix what's broken," she said. Thinking back on the last year, I realize the willingness to have this conversation is what my black and Hispanic friends have pointed to in explaining their consistent support for Hillary. Right now, those friends don't really care about climate change, tuition reimbursement, or reforming Wall Street. To the POC in my circle, concern about those things* feels like a luxury.

Clinton went on to invoke Abe and his commitment to economic equality. "He deeply believed everyone deserved – in his words – ‘a fair chance in the race of life.'"

She also said that now the GOP is in danger of changing from The Party of Lincoln to The Party of Trump. That sentence alone should make everyone want to support her. As a nation, we simply cannot have that man in the White House, and this obviously imperfect woman is now our last line of defense.

Meanwhile, back in the Old State Capitol: Hillary grew up in suburban Park Ridge. I wonder how many times in the long-ago 1950s she went down to Springfield as a girl. I wonder if it ever occurred to her that she'd give a speech in Lincoln's shadow en route to the Presidency.

*As well as my my priorities: protecting the separation of church and state and a woman's right to choose.

Good News!

I went to the doctor Monday and got good news: She thinks I'm doing "just fine."

I'm glad, because I was obsessing. While my gut's been pretty consistent lately, it's not the way it was before my long bout with c. diff. I was worried. My doctor is not.

I do, however, need to go back in November or December for more tests. It's a reminder that that c. diff is serious. Obsessing is not good, but that doesn't mean vigilance is bad.

KB!

I found tonight's All Star Game kinda boring because it doesn't really count. Yes, the winning league gets home field advantage in the World Series, and this year that might actually have an impact on my Cubs, but that feels like a long way away. My guys are tired and banged up and more than an NL win, I want them to enjoy a few well-deserved days off.

So while I was excited about the All-Star voting, and was happy to see my wonderful team so honored, little about the actual game gripped me.

Except this.

THIS WAS YUMMY! Kris Bryant's first at-bat in the All-Star Game, opposite White Sox ace Chris Sale (!), and he sent it sailing out of the park.

Awesome Chicago Tribune photo capturing the moment