Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Battle Hymn of the Republic

Memorial Day was introduced to honor the men and women who died while serving the in the United States Armed Forces. We want to make sure that message is not forgotten this weekend.

1) This recording was made live at St. Patrick's Cathedral, during Sen. Robert Kennedy's funeral. While both of Bobby's older brothers were decorated war heroes, he served too -- enlisting in the Navy in 1943. Are you a veteran? Are there veterans in your family? (We are grateful and want to hear about it.) My dad volunteered and proudly served as a corpsman in Korea. My uncle was drafted and exposed to Agent Orange in Vietnam. He had terrible health problems and died at age 69. I'm very, very angry about that. My nephew is currently on active duty in the Navy. His ship is afloat somewhere in Southeast Asia.

 

 
2) Memorial Day also kicks off the summer season. What's your favorite picnic food?  Potato salad. I think I've only ever eaten it outdoors.

 
3) Name a scent that reminds you of someone special in your life. My favorite grandpa used

to use these licorice throat discs all the time. So the smell of black licorice makes me smile and think of him.

 
4) When was the last time you had your hair cut or trimmed? I guess about three weeks ago. I'm getting it cut again next Saturday.

 
5) Crazy Sam runs on Dunkin'. Are you loyal to a particular brand of coffee? I don't drink coffee. That's a smell I just cannot stand.

 
6) If money was no object, what home improvement would you like to make this summer? I'd get new living room window treatments, which would require new rods, which would entail replastering and then repainting ... Oh, if only money was no object, what wouldn't I do?

 

7) What was the last thing you bought purely for your own enjoyment? I just bought the book Cat Daddy by Jackson Galaxy. I can't wait to read it!

8) When was the last time you rode a bike? About 3 or 4 years ago when I was on vacation in The Keys. When I was a kid, I loved riding my bike. At the health club, the stationery bike is my cardio of choice. So I thought I'd enjoy pedaling away in the Southernmost City. I didn't. I felt all awkward and wobbly.

 
9) Sam worries that many of her song selections reflect her decidedly Baby Boomer sensibilities. Is there a song or a performer that you'd like to see featured in a Saturday 9 this summer? Bon Jovi.

 

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 24

 Day 24, Friday: Your top 3 worst traits

I can be proud, defensive and lazy. 
 

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 23

Day 23, Thursday: Things you've learned that school won't teach you

No matter how good someone's life looks from the outside, you have no idea how it feels on the inside.

The hours between 2 and 4 in the afternoon crawl along, but 2 to 4 AM goes by in the blink in an eye.

Just about every American 21 and over has a favorite Sinatra song. Trust me, this is important to know. It can help you make conversation with complete strangers at social gatherings.

 

THURSDAY THIRTEEN #222

THIRTEEN RECENT MEDAL OF HONOR RECIPIENTS

Memorial Day is almost upon us, so this seems like a good time to celebrate the heroism of those who put their lives on the line for us. I'm singling out 13 of those who have already been singled out with the Medal of Honor, bestowed upon them by the President on behalf of the American people.

No matter how I feel about our recent wars -- and I admit I am ambivalent at best -- I cannot be more sincere in my admiration and gratitude to these amazing men.

1) Sergeant Clinton Romesha. Army. Afghanistan. 2013. The most recent recipient, Sgt. Romesha earned his Medal when he and his comrades were surrounded and attacked by as many as 300 combatants. Without regard for his own safety, he ventured off without cover to seek reinforcements. Over the next several hours, though seriously injured by shrapnel from a grenade and targeted by a sniper, he continued on until he could reach radio equipment. Once there, he not only radioed for help, he successfully directed air support to the enemy. His extraordinary effort gave his team the time to reorganize and ultimately defeat a much larger, better prepared enemy. Today he lives with his wife and children in Minot, North Dakota.

2) Corporal Dakota Meyer. Marines. Afghanistan, 2011. Corporal Meyer distinguished himself when his unit was ambushed. He jumped into a truck and drove, drawing fire to himself and away from fellow marines. Corporal Meyer not only managed to kill a number of enemy fighters, he evacuated friendly Afghan soldiers, many of whom were wounded. Despite a shrapnel wound to his arm, the Corporal went back repeatedly, alone and on foot, to recover the bodies of four fallen comrades. He requested that at the moment he was honored by the President there be simultaneous commemorative services at other locations for the families of the four who died in that battle.

3) Staff Sgt. Leroy Petry. Army. Afghanistan, 2011. Sgt. Petry and his team were fired upon with automatic weapons. Though wounded, he responded bravely when he saw a grenade lobbed at his men. He picked it up and threw it, thereby saving his men. But tragically the grenade went off at the moment of release, blowing off his hand. Nevertheless, Sgt. Petty is the only Medal of Honor recipient who is still on active duty.

4) Staff Sgt. Salvatore Giunta. Army. Afghanistan, 2010. While on patrol, his team was ambushed. Without regard for his own safety, Sgt. Giunta exposed himself to fire twice within a matter of moments to save others, first to administer first aid to his fallen squad leader. Though injured, the Sgt. was still conscious enough to spot insurgents carrying away American soldier. He engaged the enemy, killing one and injuring another so he could rescue and provide aid to that soldier. Thankfully, this brave young man survived and is now attending college in Colorado.

5) Staff Sgt. Robert Miller. Army. Afghanistan, 2010. Sgt. Smith was leading a patrol through a small, narrow valley when they were ambushed. With total disregard for his own safety, he called for his troops to move back to cover while he charged the enemy. He not only killed at least 10 insurgents before losing his life, his action also saved seven American soldiers and 15 soldiers of the Afghanistan National Army.

6) Sergeant Jared C. Monti. Army. Afghanistan, 2009. Sgt. Monti's 16-man patrol was attacked by 50 enemy soldiers. During the ensuing battle, one of his men was wounded, out in the open, vulnerable in front of the enemy. It took three attempts, but Sgt. Monti saved that soldier, even though it cost him his own life.

7) PFC Ross McGinnis. Army. Iraq, 2008. When a grenade was thrown into his crew's vehicle, he shouted a warning so his fellow soldiers could escape and then threw himself on top of it.

8) Petty Officer Michael Monsoor. Navy SEAL. Iraq. 2008. An enemy grenade was tossed and it bounced off his chest. Instead of escaping, he shouted a warning to the rest of his SEAL team and gave his life when he threw himself onto the grenade.

9) Lt. Michael Murphy, Navy SEAL. Afghanistan. 2007. While on a special reconnaissance mission in rugged terrain, Lt. Murphy's unit was discovered and outnumbered by the enemy. He tried to call for help, but their telecommunications equipment wouldn't work in this remote area. He deliberately moved to an open area, exposing himself to mortal injury, in order to call for support and rescue for his team.

10) Corporal Jason L. Dunham. Marines. Iraq, 2007. Mortally wounded when he threw himself onto a grenade, saving the lives of at least a dozen fellow Marines.

11) Sgt. Paul Smith. Army. Iraq, 2005. When his Army construction (meaning not combat ready) company was attacked, he hastily organized a defense. Though he was killed returning fire, his heroism enabled more 100 of his fellow soldiers to safely escape.

12) Master Sgt. Gary Gordon. Army. Somalia, 1993. Armed with only his rifle, Sgt. Gordon protected the site of a helicopter crash for hours until another aircraft could come for the wounded crew. He was shot more than once and when he realized his wounds were fatal, he handed his gun to the injured helicopter pilot with the words, "Good luck." That four-man helicopter crew was rescued alive.

13) Sgt. Randall Shughart. Army. Somalia, 1993. Sgt. Shughart volunteered to enter an area dense with landmines and enemy personnel to rescue the crew of a downed helicopter. It took multiple trips and resulted in him receiving mortal wounds, but he bravely recovered three dead soldiers and brought the pilot to safety and medical attention.

For more about the Thursday 13, 
or to play along yourself, click here.

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 22

Day 22, Wednesday: Rant about something. Get up on your soapbox and tell us how you really feel. (a pet peeve, a current event, a controversial topic, something your husband or roommate or neighbor or boss does that really ticks you off)

I am so fucking tired of this Recession! I hate worrying every three months (each quarter) that I'm going to be let go. There aren't a lot of jobs out there ... fewer at my salary ... fewer still for someone over 50. I'm angry, I'm scared, I feel helpless.

In the 1990s, we hired people then who were my age now. We hired anyone whose knuckles didn't drag. We had more jobs than people.

But now it's my turn. Now I'm facing unemployment, but there are no jobs. This is not fair.

And that's just me. If I wasn't worried about making myself too sad, I'd detail what's going on with best friend (unemployed), my former boss Ed (unemployed), my friend in the Keys (underemployed) and my friend John (underemployed). 

Can't we turn the page already? Can't we start over with a fresh new economy? Can't I stop worrying?

Your help is needed

Oklahoma has been devastated by tornadoes. Lives were lost and homes destroyed. And families torn apart.

Because if you have ever shared your home with a dog or cat, you know that they become your family. And during storms like this, they get frightened and frantic and run away.

Often, when their humans have to find temporary housing in shelters or
hotels/motels, dogs and cats aren't welcome. Where can they leave their furry family members?

It's at times like this when local animal shelters are so important. If you have a few dollars to share, please send them to the Central Oklahoma Humane Society. Their Disaster Relief Fund is up and running.

I itch

The hole in my back is making me cuh-razy! It's less visible than the black stitches on my lip, but it's actually the more serious wound, from the more suspicious mole. And there's nothing I want to do more right now than rip off the big, itchy adhesive and give it a good scratch. But I won't.

But I want to.

The stitches on my face are less embarrassing than I thought they'd be now that the swelling is down, and I've been careful with the regular, by-the-rules application of antiseptic ointment.

This will be over on Tuesday!

Men are weird

I worked for a couple years with an art director I clashed with. Daily. So I thought he disliked me. I found out -- when our little creative team blew up in internecine conflict -- that he really kind of admired me and totally had my back. He was back in the Loop today for the first time in years and he really wanted to see me. Three of us had lunch together today. It was nice, but it also confused me. So he considers us friends? I matter to him? Who knew?

My best friend, on the other hand, completely (and I think willfully) misunderstood an email I sent him and tore a strip out of me. His wife's grandfather just died and he was feeling overwhelmed by family obligations and he took it out on me. Understandable, I suppose, but not very nice. I'm not even sure he realized that's what he did.

Why are men so complicated? Even men I'm not sleeping with!

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 22

Day 21, Tuesday: A list of links to your favorite posts in your archives

This is my favorite Thursday Thirteen, and I've done literally hundreds of them. It's an original idea -- women I'll look up when I get to heaven -- and I think I did a good job with it. Scroll through the comments and you'll see one from columnist John Dickerson. It made me happy that I got to make him happy. People really do read what we write!

I like this Trifecta entry based on the prompt, "Home." Writing it made me happy. Reading it makes me happy.

I like this one about Peggy Noonan because it's well written, rather timeless (as long as Peggy keeps appearing on Sunday morning TV), and because it still somehow gets a lot of hits and really annoyed a stranger named Steve.

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 20

Day 20, Monday: Get real. Share something you're struggling with right now.

Reynaldo. It's embarrassing how much of my life revolves around tending to, disciplining, worrying about and cursing that skinny beige bundle of fur.

Currently he's suffering from Feline Lower Urinary Tract Disease. It's getting better since he's been on a special diet from the vet. But when he's not feeling well, he gets more aggressive, more destructive, more demanding. I understand now that he's just trying to get my attention, because he wants desperately for me to fix him. And I'm trying!

It wasn't so bad ... at the time

Had two moles removed today: a large one from my back and a highly visible one on the right side of my mouth. The plastic
surgeon who did the deed was quite deft. While she was carving, I didn't feel a thing.

I feel quite a bit right now, however. My lip is swollen and marked by four thick black stitches. My back hurts where the adhesive is tugging.

Oh well, by Thursday morning, the stitches on my back will have dissolved. And next Tuesday morning, the stitches on my lip will be removed. This is painful and unpleasant, but it will be shortlived.

The important thing is that both my erstwhile moles come back from the lab benign. (Fingers crossed.)

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: the fairy tale meme

Snow White: Do you consider yourself pretty? Name the part of your body you think is the most beautiful! I have never been pretty but I have bright green eyes.

Cinderella: What is your shoe size? 6.5

Sleeping Beauty: How many hours do you sleep each night? Again, 6.5.

Little Red Riding Hood: What is your favorite food?  Beef

The Frog Prince: What do you find disgusting? Puke. Meaning grown up human vomit. I'm OK with everything that emanates from furry critters and baby people, but full-on puke does make me queasy.

Jack and the Beanstalk: What plants are in your room? I have a gorgeous philodendron in my office. No plants at home, though.

Puss in Boots: Do you have a pet? Do you want one? I have three cats. That's plenty for now, thank you. :)

 Rumpelstiltskin: What is the meaning of your url?  It was available.

The Little Mermaid: Can you sing? No

Pinocchio: What is your greatest wish? Safety and security

Peter Pan: What is your (mental) age?  About 30. Eternally.

The Star Money: What is your most prized possession?   A ceramic cable car. It belonged to my favorite grandfather. It was on his dresser and he used it to hold his cufflinks, tie clasps and licorice throat lozenges. Every time I look at it, I can almost smell the licorice.

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 18

Day 18, Saturday: Tell a story from your childhood. Dig deep and try to be descriptive about what you remember and how you felt.

FREE. That's how I felt as a child whenever I was on the swings.

I recently said "goodbye" to my childhood home and as I went from room to room, I remembered anew how unhappy I'd been there and knew I wouldn't miss it. But the yard! That was another story. I loved the yard, with the inflatable pool and trees to lay under and snow and leaves to play in and, best of all, the swingset. I could sail through air for hours at a time. Since our yard connected me to the home of my oldest friend, she often joined me. We'd swing and sing Beatle songs.

The swings in our yard were my favorite swings, but not my only ones. There was the rope swing with the wooden seat at my Grandpa's house. He built it for my Aunt Joanne when she was a little girl and I really enjoyed knowing exactly where it came from. My Grandpa loved being in his tool shop, and I liked thinking about him drilling the holes and knotting the rope. Also, it gave me an escape from the grownup discussions that grew so boring in the kitchen.

There was also the swingset at the playground. The swings there had heavy black rubber seats, perfect for laying on your tummy and swinging headfirst into the air.

The only one I wasn't crazy for was the one at school. For some reason, swings were a major "chick thing," and there was always a line of girls waiting for a turn. I wasn't interested in having my swing time monitored. That was fine for the monkey bars or the slide. But the swing! Knowing when your urge to fly is satisfied is unique to each individual and should never be regimented.

Oh, Honey!

The asswipe referred to on this blog as Archie Bunker has 587 Facebook friends and 381 Twitter followers. Only one is sponsoring his dog in the Strut Your Mutt fundraiser. That would be my oldest friend. To the tune of $25.

Her FICO score is in the basement. She is paying for her son's college and will soon be looking at a bill for approx. $16,000 for her daughter's tuition to cosmetology school. At 56, she has no retirement savings to speak of.

She also has no friends out there in California. That's why she did this. She wants Archie, the Match.com fix-up that didn't work out, to call her. I bet he no longer has her number.

But I have his. The Gal worries so much.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Greased Lightnin'

1) Greased Lightnin' was the name of a car. Have you ever given your car a name? Sorry. I don't have a car.

2) Could your vehicle use a trip to the car wash this weekend? Well, the local PACE buses could certainly benefit from a little spring cleaning.

 

3) This song is from the soundtrack of the movie Grease, the biggest money-making movie musical of all time. Have you ever seen it? About a million times.

 
4) John Travolta's astrological sign is Aquarius. What's yours? I'm on the cusp between Scorpio and Sagittarius. 

  5)  In addition to being John Travolta's birthplace, Englewood, New Jersey, played a significant role in telecommunications history. In 1951, Englewood's mayor made the first-ever direct dial long-distance call in the United States. Now it's your turn. Tell us something about your birthplace. I'm going to define "birthplace" literally and tell you about the hospital I arrived in. While it was just a plain, old run-of-the-mill community hospital when my mom checked in, about 10 years after my birth it was converted to a mental health facility for those citizens who have either been found unfit to stand trial or not guilty by reason of insanity. My family has always enjoyed teasing me about being born in "the funny farm."

 

6) Travolta is an excellent dancer. How are you on the dance floor? I suck.

7) Grease is an upbeat musical about the students of Rydell High. Another Travolta movie is Carrie, which features the worst prom night imaginable. Grease or Carrie -- which is closer to your high school experience? Definitely Carrie. I hated high school.

 

8) What was your best subject in high school? What was your worst? English and American history were the best. Algebra and chemistry were the worst.

  9) Sam made good use of the bus ride to school, using that time to complete her homework. What do you remember about getting to or from school? We rode to school in a car pool. I hated it most of all when it was my parents' turn. My dad smoked constantly and drove this big boat of a Cadillac. Stuck in back seat, trying to breathe, we were like canaries in a coal mine.

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 17

Day 17, Friday: A favorite photo of yourself and why

Because the 1960s appeal to me, and because I see so much of my younger self in Peggy Olson on Mad Men.

Yenta, heal thyself

I can be very bossy with my oldest friend. Life overwhelms her at times and it's hard to resist the impulse to tell her to move over, gimme the keys and let me drive. And ok, often I don't resist the impulse at all. Like I said, bossy.

One of the things I've been bugging her about is Meetup.com. Since moving to Los Angeles she's become more isolated. She needs friends! She carries on a tepid online flirtation with Archie Bunker and has been Facebooking with people we went to highschool with (back when Robert Redford was Gatsby). Other than that, she has the troubled son who sleeps on her sofa and her physically nearby but emotionally distant cousin to talk to. Period.

A coworker of mine here in Chicago used Meetup a lot last summer and expanded her independent, post-divorce circle of friends. She found foodies to eat out with (Chicago is a great city for dining). But there are plenty of LA-area Meetup groups that enjoy books and movies. My friend once loved her Chicagoland book club and hell, LA is the movie capital of the world. So I've been nagging and cajoling and being all pushy.

Then it occurred to me -- I haven't made a new friend in years. While my circle of friends is loving and diverse, there's no reason not to add to it, is there? And so, this past Tuesday, I attended a Meetup my damn self.

It was a screening of Mildred Pierce for about a dozen of us. The moderator, Will*, and I really hit it off. He appreciated my enthusiasm. Quite a few of the people in the room never saw the movie before, so it was fun to experience it with them. One of the women there was reserved but really bright and recommended another film noir classic, Leave Her to Heaven.

This group meets once a month. Next month is The Postman Always Rings Twice. I'm going to make an effort to go.

Now if only my oldest friend would get off her sofa and give Meetup a try!

*Will's path very nearly crossed with my friend, Ed. Will is an independent contractor for the company that laid Ed off. Chicago can be a small community.

Jodi Arias: Betty Broderick Redux

Betty Broderick was the defendant in one of the first trials ever covered by TV, gavel to gavel. In 1989, she shot her ex-husband Dan and his younger, second wife Linda as they slept. Five times. Pre-dawn. In their own bed. In their own home. That she snuck into, using a key stolen from their eldest daughter.

Her defense? They drove her to it. By sleeping in their own bed in their own home before sunrise on a Sunday morning. I can see why she felt threatened.

There is no evidence of any abuse at the hands of ex-husband Dan. There is however, record of the $9,000/month he gave her. Even though she had relinquished custody of their children to him. With inflation, that's $18,900/month in today's dollars ... or $228,000/year. All for herself (remember, he had their kids.) In exchange, all he wanted was to be left alone. He took out restraining orders against Betty and she violated each and every once, once driving her Suburban (paid for by Dan) through his front door.

Believe it or not, there are women out there who don't revile Betty. They sympathize with and idolize her! Betty is big on jailhouse interviews and loves answering her "fan mail." Shudder.

Don't take my word for what a narcissistic, murderous bitch Betty is. 

Read CNN's account of her most recent and very colorful parole hearing here.

Jodi Arias is the 2013 model of Betty Broderick. I can't help but notice the similarities between these two high profile killers. Jodi murdered her former boyfriend, Travis Alexander because he drove her to it. While Dan and Linda put Betty in imminent physical peril by sleeping in their own bed, Travis terrified Jodi by being nude and vulnerable in his own shower. Just as Dan's real sin was growing weary of his batshit crazy, wildly self-centered ex-wife, Travis' was choosing to go to Cancun with someone other than his batshit crazy, wildly self-centered ex-girlfriend. Like Betty, Jodi has never met a TV camera she didn't like and like Betty, she can't stop sliming the man she murdered.

While Jodi's crime was more savage and hands-on (she used a knife), Betty's body count was double and through her monstrously selfish act she left her children parent-less. So which cold-blooded murderer is "worse?" I'll leave that for God to sort out.

As an old school feminist, I'm glad that Jodi isn't garnering the fan base Betty did. Maybe the times, they are finally a-changing, and women are beginning to own their lives and their choices. "Poor little me. He made me do it!" doesn't seem to wash anymore.

Both photos are from CNN

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 16

Day 16, Thursday: Something difficult about your "lot in life" and how you're working to overcome it

I survived physical abuse. When I was a teen, I was sexually molested by a revered older male relative. For the first 17 years of my life I was regularly beaten by my bigger, older sister. These two realities set the stage for a long, abusive relationship when I was in my 20s. I somehow came to believe that was my "lot in life," that somehow it's OK to handle me and treat me anyway you wish.

That is not the case. I deserve dignity, respect and kindness.

When I turned 30, I ended that abusive relationship, entered therapy and joined a church.

More than 20 years later, I still struggle. I ended a relationship with a good man perhaps prematurely, I was so worried about walking down that doormat road again. I have problems with intimacy -- I am more honest on this blog than I am in life. My shrink said my past has made me too reluctant to let people see my "backstage." And I worry about what is my fault, what is my responsibility, and what is not. 

But I am, for the most part, a happy woman. I have a solid sense of humor and many good friends whom I treasure. I find joy in the world around me. My past has made me strong, independent and resilient, and those are all things I'm grateful to God for.

THURSDAY THIRTEEN #221

THIRTEEN THINGS ABOUT COCA COLA

You know it. Everyone does.  

In 2011 it was declared the most valuable brand on the planet.

And it's always my drink of choice.

1) Coca Cola is America's best-known export, sold in every country in the world except Cuba and North Korea.

2) It was invented by an Atlanta pharmacist in the late 1800s who believed that his carbonated soda/syrup mix had "energizing" medicinal purposes (it was whispered to be a remedy for impotence) and could cure headaches.

3) Once the pharmacist sold the formula, it was marketed as a soft drink. The first ad ran in the Atlanta Journal, declaring it: "Delicious. Refreshing. Exhilarating. Invigorating."

4) Coca Cola memorabilia from that era is prized among collectors. Recently a 19th century antique clock with the logo was auctioned for nearly $100,000.

5)  In 1935, Coca Cola was certified "kosher."

6) Its color is caramel -- Caramel E-150d to be exact.  

7) Coca-Cola, the logo, the name Coke and the shape of the bottle are all trademarked

8) In 1944, the billionth bottle was sold.

9) In 1951, a little known actress named Marilyn Monroe made a Coke commercial with Jack Paar as part of a promotion for their movie, Love Nest.



10) In 1955, Coca Cola began being sold in cans.

11) Its most famous jingle, "I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing," became a hit record in 1971.

12) Early in his career, Republican Presidential candidate Herman Cain worked for Coca-Cola as chauffeur to the company president.

13) A large portion of Coca Cola's business -- both nationally and internationally -- comes from their long relationship with another well-known brand: McDonald's.

For more about the Thursday 13, 
or to play along yourself, click here.

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 14

Day 14, Tuesday: Ten things that make you really happy

1) Singing along with my shower radio as I wash my hair 
2) Cuddling with my big old tomcat, Joey
3) Going to the movies
4) Losing myself in a book
5) The color of the sky
6) Cubs Win! Cubs Win!
7) A job well done
8) Kids. At church last Sunday, two little ones were dedicated (baptized) and it was a delight to both observe them, and their slightly older sibs.
9) Seeing my best friend's name in my inbox
10) Being downtown

 

Trifecta

 

This week's challenge: Using between 33 and 333 words, compose something that includes the third definition of the following word:

 

DELIBERATE

3: slow, unhurried, and steady as though allowing time for decision on each individual action involved

There was no sharp realization, no Oprah “Aha! Moment.” It wasn’t that neat or clean or sudden. 

It may not have happened "All at Once," like in the song, but it happened all the same. As deliberate as it was ineffable.  

I find I'm no longer in love.

About the photo: Life Magazine makes a library of their archive images available for free to use for “non-commercial personal purposes."

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 13

Day 13, Monday: Issue a public apology.

Dear Fat Me, I'm so sorry I didn't go to the health club today. I know I am in abhorrent physical condition just now, and blowing off my cardio time is not good for my self esteem, self respect or health. I feel bad, but that's not productive, either. So I will simply work harder tomorrow to do better by and for myself

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 12

Day 12, Sunday: What do you miss? (a person, a thing, a place, a time of your life...)

This is a no-brainer for Mother's Day, but I miss my mom. This was my first Mother's Day without her in my life, but it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. And this blog really helped me get through it.

For I have a real-time, honest log of my feelings on Mother's Days gone by and, frankly, those posts don't represent my mom and me at our best. She was wrestling health problems, she was vague, she was thoughtless ... I am not sorry to not have another painful Mother's Day to add. 

Which is not to say there isn't a lot about my mother that I admire and that I don't miss her. But it's important to see her clearly. She wasn't perfect. Our relationship wasn't perfect. And I'm glad that her health problems are behind her and that she is happy, whole and with God.

Compare and Contrast

I kept busy this weekend with an old friend, Jay Gatsby. I loooooved The Great Gatsby the first time I read it, in high school. Yes, I was listening when the teacher told us it was about the American belief in money equaling success, and our national penchant for invention. (She may even have used the word, "penchant.") But that wasn't my takeaway. For the first time I understood the phrase, "the end doesn't justify the means." I got it. I realized that it didn't matter why Gatsby was bootlegging and money laundering. Love wasn't a good enough reason. Buried in the lush, beautiful prose was a real life lesson and I got it.

Of the great Jass Age novelists, I enjoy Hemingway's style more than Fitzgerald's. It's clean and spare and credible. But Fitzgerald's masterpiece has a moral core that touches me and teaches me.

To celebrate the release of the latest cinematic incarnation, starring Leonardo DiCaprio as my old friend, I watched the 1974 version. The one I saw in high school, starring my great teenage crush, Robert Redford. At the time, I loved him as Gatsby, but I couldn't stand Mia Farrow as Daisy. I remember thinking of her as "Dismal Daisy." Why was he so obsessed with such a silly girl? Watched today, I still feel the same way about Jay and Daisy. Karen Black as Myrtle is woeful. But I loved the sets and the clothes and the music. And I appreciate Sam Waterston -- so familiar as Jack McCoy on Law & Order -- as Nick. Our Everyman. Our entree into that privileged world.

Then I went to see the new, 3D Baz Luhrman version on the big screen. Oh, how it sucks! The sets are elaborate and annoying. The soundtrack is intrusive and pretentious. I'm sure Leo is a better actor than Redford, but he's less of a star, and when he appears behind the wheel of the yellow convertible or slips into the pink suit, the audience actually snickered at how silly he looked.

Carey Mulligan is Leo's object of desire and I found her to be just as dismal a Daisy. I think maybe that part is unplayable. I found her so sympathetic in the book, a woman as restricted by her money as she would be by poverty. But in both 1974 and 2013, she's just grating.

I wonder why it's so hard to make a good movie based on this wonderful book.

One thing at a time

My living room is slowly coming together. First I got the new air conditioner. Today I bought this new futon (though when it arrives it will have a green/pink print cover).

I went futon for a reason: When it gets too dirty or shows too much wear, I can just get a new cover or mattress. I'm tired of everything in my life being disposable. My last two sofas lasted little more than five years each. One was an off-size, so I couldn't get a slipcover for it and it wasn't worth the investment of having it reupholstered, and the one I'm sitting on now turned out to be a piece of crap.

Anyway, next on my list of things to do in this living room is get rid of a lot of crap. Then I'm going to use my carpet cleaner. Soon this place will be presentable.