Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Letters From the Sky

1. Do you believe that we will ever be contacted by beings from another planet? Yes. I just have a hard time imagining what that contact will be like.

2. Have you or a family member ever traced your family tree? Not literally. My cousin Rose has traced her family back to Elizabethan England. But the branch of her family that she followed for centuries is her dad's, and we're related through her mother's side. Still, it was fun to learn that the easy going, unpretentious man I remember being happiest with a beer can in one hand and a fishing pole in the other was directly descended from the peerage.

3. Did you ever consider an acting career? I did when I was a little girl. I was going to be a great star.

4. What is the funniest situation you’ve witnessed in a religious setting? To celebrate Earth Day, the kindergarten Sunday School kids serenaded us with "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands." As they sang, they tossed soft stress balls that looked like globes back and forth. It was very adorable ... until they were done. Their teacher gave them a sign that meant they were supposed to lightly toss their soft globes into the congregation. She didn't count on how competitive and rambunctious little boys can be. They freakin' pelted those in the front pews.

5. What's the first movie you remember ever seeing in a theater? Mary Poppins. I remember everything about it … once the coming attractions ended, the heavy red curtains closed, then reopened, and there they were, the rooftops of London! Magic! I have loved going to the movies ever since.

6. What's the most difficult confession you've ever had to make? I got caught in a lie while in high school. It was humiliating.

7. What is a city that you have visited and hated? As a rule, I have liked every city I've ever been in. The teeny-tiny town that I visited and hated is Green Lake, Wisconsin (population: 1,100). Every year, my family used to drag me along to a part of the world where that was the biggest metropolis. Which meant that for two weeks every summer, the only interaction we really had was with one another. Which meant that for two weeks every summer, I felt like Marilyn Munster.

8. Has anyone in your life been "they one who got away"? Yes. There's an old lover who still pops into my head, one way or another, every day. I hope he's happy.

9. Why do you think the 10 foot duck walked into the bar on Thursday Thunks? A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender "Got any grapes?" The bartender says "No, I don’t have any grapes." The duck walks out, sorely disappointed. So the next day, he walks back into the bar, asks the same question, gets the same answer. The day after, he walks back into the bar, and again, asks the bartender, "Do you have any grapes?" The bartender, having still not figured out why this duck seems to think he may have some grapes, says to the duck, "No, and if you come back in here tomorrow and ask me if I have any grapes, I will nail your bill to the bar!" The duck turns around, and walks out of the bar. So the next day, the duck walks back into the bar, and asks the bartender "Got any nails?" The bartender says, "No." So the duck says, "Got any grapes?"

Thank you, thank you. Don't forget to tip your waitress. She works hard for the money.