I can't relax. I can't chill out. I'm under a lot of stress at work these days (which I resent, because it's not client-generated; it's internal agita we're inflicting on ourselves), but that's not unique. I've been working in advertising agencies since 1992; I know this shit happens. But for some reason tonight I can't unwind.
I've worked out. I've turned to junk TV (Law & Order rerun). Nothing is working. Nothing is distracting me. If I was a Warner Bros. cartoon character, you could see my heart beating through my shirt.
Drink or pill? Xanax or vodka? Is one better (or worse) than the other?
There's something else that reliably calms me down when I'm in a mood like this. But I'm not seeing anyone right now.
I'm going with Xanax. I don't need to worry about a headache later.
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