I just saw Chuck Todd interview Sen. Amy Kobuchar on Meet the Press. He asked her if Democrats assume some responsibility for decades of sexual harassment because of the pass he thinks Bill Clinton received in the 1990s.
First of all, Bill Clinton didn't receive a pass. He was impeached. Yes, I know he was charged with perjury and (are you listening, Donald Trump?) obstruction of justice. But if you ask anyone on the street why Bill was impeached, you'll hear, "Monica Lewinsky." The 42nd President of the United States' legacy is forever tainted.
Second, women have always understood how ugly Bill's behavior was during the Lewinsky scandal. Here is what I wrote about it in 2010.
The prompt was to write a letter to "a hero that has let you down." I haven't changed a syllable. I don't have to.
Dear Mr. President:
Every time I think of you, that old
Laura Nyro song starts playing in my head. You know the one, "BILL! I
love you so, I always will ..."
And I did and I do. But you broke my heart.
It wasn't the infidelity
that bothered me. Hell, I'm a Kennedy girl. I grew up believing we can
and should separate personal behavior from public performance.
It
was the way you allowed your good ol' boy horndog behavior to seep from
the personal to the public that makes me nuts. You did a young and
emotionally vulnerable girl in the Oval Office! How did you think you
were going to get away with that? And I don't for a moment think you
cared for that poor kid. You saw more interesting, more attractive women
every day on the rope line in front of the White House (remember, this
was before 9/11 when we could tour 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue). You chose
her simply because she was there, and you did her simply because you
could. And then you not only lied about it, you demeaned her ("I never
had sexual relations with that woman
..."). The imbalance of power between you two and your fates appalls
me. YOU were the most powerful man in the free world, YOU were the one
with a wife and daughter (a daughter not that much older than your
mistress). Yet today you remain one of the most popular men on the
planet, and she's a punchline, a synonym for oral sex. How is that fair?
You're
a good man and you have done a lot of good. But you had the capacity
to do more and be a great man. I believed in you, and you let me down.
You let the nation down. And you let yourself down. Every account of
your presidency will include the phrase, "impeached by the House of
Representatives."
And yet ... and yet ... When you talk about
the Clinton Global Initiative, I'm transfixed. When I watched you walk
Chelsea down the aisle, I got misty. Every time you have a health problem, I say a little prayer.
So even though you broke my heart, I love you so, and I always will.
These are the thoughts and observations of me — a woman of a certain age. (Oh, my, God, I'm 65!) I'm single. I'm successful enough (independent, self supporting). I live just outside Chicago, the best city in the world. I'm an aunt and a friend. I feel that voices like mine are rather underrepresented online or in print. So here I am. If my musings resonate with you, please visit my blog again sometime.
Sunday, November 12, 2017
Saturday, November 11, 2017
Sunday Stealing
The Simple Life
What are five things you would like to do more.
1) Exercise
2) Volunteer
3) Read
4) Write for pleasure
5) Attend church
What was the best thing that happened this week?
What is something you are stressed about?
What book has influenced your life?
Share a childhood memory
What are weird things you like?
Name three things you do well.
What are your priorities in life?
Best book you read this year?
What are five things you would like to do more.
1) Exercise
2) Volunteer
3) Read
4) Write for pleasure
5) Attend church
What is your quote to live by
What was the best thing that happened this week?
Friday evening, I got a new pair of contact lenses. YEA! Those glasses were really cramping my style.
What is something you are stressed about?
Ha! There's a possibility that I'll be let go on November 15. I believe that's worth a sleepless night or two.
What book has influenced your life?
Saving Graces by Elizabeth Edwards. I read it a decade ago, and I still think about it.
Share a childhood memory
The Christmas I was in second grade, Santa brought me this very poster. Which I hung on my bedroom door and kissed every morning and night.
What fictional character would you most like to be?
Mary Poppins, because she was practically perfect in every way.
What is something you are proud of?
I have given good homes to the cats I've rescued.
What was the last thing you celebrated?
Last weekend, I had lunch with my friend Nancy for the first time in months, and I gave her a mug ("Potent potables for $20, Alex") to celebrate her appearance as a contestant on Jeopardy.
What are weird things you like?
What is your favorite song to sing?
I found myself singing along to "Memories" with Elvis. "Holding hands and red bouquets and twilights trimmed in purple haze ..." The King sounded so sincere on those ballads.
Name three things you do well.
1) Bonding with critters
2) Present to clients
3) Laundry (I hate it, but I'm good at it)
What are your priorities in life?
I try to live by the Golden Rule.
What is something that scares you?
Losing my job on November 15.
Best book you read this year?
Perhaps it's the sin of recency, but I'll go with the one I just finished, Rosemary: The Hidden Kennedy Daughter. Haunting and heartbreaking.
Labels:
Books,
Kennedy,
meme,
Sigh,
Sunday Stealing
It gives me hope
Anika is an Indian-born market researcher who has worked at my agency for four years now. Early in her career here, she sat outside the office I share with my coworkers and did the most wonderful thing: she surprised me with a Christmas present for being "the most thoughtful person I've ever had the good fortune of knowing. You spread holiday cheer year around." Because she sees me that way, I work hard to be a good person, to live up to her expectation.
This past week, she showed what an extraordinary woman she is.
She's been researching marketing to the LGBTQ community, which is important to our clients because demographically-speaking, gay HHs have an impressive amount of disposable income. Yet while she was collecting data, she worried she was missing nuance. After all, she grew up in India, where homosexuality is still illegal. Since she's been in Chicago, she's watched us all become more accepting and welcoming, but she doesn't know a single "out" LGBTQ American.
Without any prompting, she approached our HR department and asked how to find a gay coworker to help her craft a more sensitive and inclusive presentation. Her request gave Human Resources a pause. Sexuality is not a box to be ticked on any form. But they put Anika in touch with Andy, a numbers-cruncher at one of our sister agencies, who is out and proud and just thrilled to be involved with something more creative than monthly billing.
Anika and Andy's presentation was well attended (yes, lunch was provided) and sensitive. At times, I welled up. Partly because of the content -- I was thinking of my friends John and Henry and Reg and the obstacles they have faced, and how far our society has come in accepting them. Partly because of the fact of it.
I mean, here was Anika. Reaching out. Going beyond her upbringing, working hard to assimilate into her chosen country and to open her heart. I find this so moving, and it gives me hope.
This past week, she showed what an extraordinary woman she is.
She's been researching marketing to the LGBTQ community, which is important to our clients because demographically-speaking, gay HHs have an impressive amount of disposable income. Yet while she was collecting data, she worried she was missing nuance. After all, she grew up in India, where homosexuality is still illegal. Since she's been in Chicago, she's watched us all become more accepting and welcoming, but she doesn't know a single "out" LGBTQ American.
Without any prompting, she approached our HR department and asked how to find a gay coworker to help her craft a more sensitive and inclusive presentation. Her request gave Human Resources a pause. Sexuality is not a box to be ticked on any form. But they put Anika in touch with Andy, a numbers-cruncher at one of our sister agencies, who is out and proud and just thrilled to be involved with something more creative than monthly billing.
Anika and Andy's presentation was well attended (yes, lunch was provided) and sensitive. At times, I welled up. Partly because of the content -- I was thinking of my friends John and Henry and Reg and the obstacles they have faced, and how far our society has come in accepting them. Partly because of the fact of it.
I mean, here was Anika. Reaching out. Going beyond her upbringing, working hard to assimilate into her chosen country and to open her heart. I find this so moving, and it gives me hope.
Saturday 9
Saturday 9: Get Down Tonight (1975)
1) Tonight, KC has three things on his "to-do" list: do a little dance, make a little love and get down. Tell us three things you'd like to accomplish this weekend. 1) Make a dent in that freelance project I took on. It's not due until Thursday, but I'd like to knock it out now and then spend the rest of the week refining it. 2) Laundry. There's always laundry. 3) Attend a special screening of Casablanca with Will and my movie group.
2)
This week's song is considered emblematic of disco, a genre that had as
many detractors as fans. Is there a kind of music you simply cannot
stand? That would be disco. (Though I admit a certain fondness of the Brothers Gibb.)
3) Before becoming a musician, KC, aka Harry Casey, worked in a record store. In those days, record stores were very popular. Peaches, Coconuts, Sam Goody and Tower Records are four store chains that once dotted the landscape but now are gone. Today, if you wanted to purchase a CD, where would you turn? Amazon. I always check out the ones I see by the register at Starbucks, Walgreen's and Whole Foods, but I seldom buy.
4) One of his duties at the record store was unloading the big corrugated shippers filled with LPs. What's the heaviest thing you've lifted lately? My fat ass.
5) KC is proud that he's lived his entire life in Miami-Dade County. Do you expect to change your address in the next year or so? No.
6) In 1975, the year this song was popular, former Teamsters boss Jimmy Hoffa disappeared, never to be seen again. Many theories flourish about what may have happened to him. Is there a famous criminal case that has a hold on your attention? I recently befriended a pair of millennials who had absolutely no idea who Patty Hearst is. I suppose that's a good thing for Patty, but it got me thinking about her case again. I picked up Jeffrey Toobin's 2016 book on the case and it's waiting on my TBR pile.
7) Jaws was the most popular movie of 1975. Are you afraid of sharks? Not especially.
8) Actress Angelina Jolie was born in 1975. People magazine once named her
9) Random question: A wizard offers you a choice -- would you like your life to stay as it is right now (in terms of your health, your career, your relationships and your finances) for the next 5 years, or would you like to take a chance that the future will be brighter? I'm frankly terrified of the future. I'd like to stay frozen here. At least I know this life.
Labels:
Current affairs,
meme,
movies,
Saturday 9
Friday, November 10, 2017
Friday 56
Rules:
*Grab a book, any book.
*Turn to page 56 or 56% in your eReader
(If you have to improvise, that's ok.)
*Find any sentence, (or few, just don't spoil it)
*Post it.
From A Murder Is Announced by Agatha Christie. Everyone in a small British town (Chipping Cleghorn, I love that name!) reads the ads placed by their neighbors in The Gazette. Amid the help wanted's and the puppies for sale, they find one announcing a murder. At 6:30 PM. At an exact address. The woman who lives at that address didn't place the notice. Everyone assumes it was a prank or a game and her neighbors assemble at her home at 6:30 to see what happens.
Instead of good fun, something terrifying occurs. The lights go out, shots are fired, and .... Inspector Craddock is called. He begins questioning the attendees. One guest points a finger at the household help.
From page 56:
"Mitzi's mixed up in it! Awful temper she has, and oh! The airs she gives herself!"
And in this corner ...
A little background: For at least 10 years, this building has had a rule against renting. The reasoning? The more rental units a condo building has, the more expensive the insurance on the common areas. There is also some evidence that renters are not as careful about their homes as owners. I must admit I don't care whether or not we have renters. I was a renter for most of my adult life and can attest I am just as lazy a housekeeper as an owner.
But the "no rental" rule is in the by-laws. When he buys in our building, every owner agrees to live in his unit. And I believe in rules being fairly enforced. Nearly 30% of our building is now illegal renters. That's not fair to all us who follow the rules. Plus, there's a security problem: our management company does not have contact information for these renters because they've rented illegally and the landlords don't admit they're there. This pisses the village off, because there's no resident to contact in case of emergency.
I came on the board back in April, and we talked about the problem back then. It wasn't a priority, really. We had more immediate problems -- a leak in the ceiling over the stairwell, a balky coin slide on one of the dryers in the laundry room, a problem with the water meter reading ...
Last month we met again to discuss the budget. Obviously we need more money. We always do, if we want to do everything that needs to be done around here. The matter of renters came up again. Our management company said a way to bring more money in is to fine the owners who rent. We can legally demand to see the leases and fine them for all the months they've been renting. We can assess them in advance for the $175 move-out fee. And we can set a date certain that their tenants have to be gone. If the renters remain, the owners can be fined even more.
"Let's do it!" Our treasurer was so enthusiastic. "Ayn Rand" is all about personal responsibility. The owners knew they were breaking the rules. He wanted to send out a letter, dated October 31, that deemed all renters were evicted as of November 30.
"No!" countered "Norma Rae." I reasoned that was unnecessarily punitive to renters, who signed their leases in good faith and don't realize they are living in illegal apartments. 30 days to find a new home when there aren't many apartments for rent? At a time when kids are still in school? Over Thanksgiving?
![]() |
That's me in the beige trunks. |
"OK," Ayn Rand responded. "60 days." Then he warned me that, if people realize they can appeal to my conscience, they'll use that against me. What the fuck! Of course you can appeal to my conscience! I have no intention of changing!
Besides, 60 days puts us to Christmas/New Year's. And, undoubtedly, snow. I will not literally throw my neighbors out into the snow. Oh, and by the way, if we're all about "personal responsibility," then as a board we have to own the fact that we didn't act on this problem in April. I told him that, if he had wanted to send a letter out on May 1, having everyone out on June 30, I would have been amenable. But we didn't bother to investigate our options until October. Shame on us. Now we have to accept the responsibility of that oversight.
I suggested the letter go out January 1 and give the tenants until August 15 to move out. Now I know that was too generous. I really wanted June 15, so the later date was just my negotiation tactic.
As the emails between Norma Rae and Ayn Rand got more heated, our president weighed in. When I received the message that began, "Gal, bless your heart ..." I knew I wasn't going to get everything I wanted.
But I got a lot.
We're working with the lawyers on a letter that will go out December 1, giving the owners/tenants notice that all renters have to be out by May 31. The board will collect a lot in fines and penalties, which will enable us to make some of the renovations everyone wants without an increase in assessments (which no one wants).
And we'll all live happily ever after.
Tuesday, November 07, 2017
WWW.WEDNESDAY
WWW.
WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To
participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here.
1. What are you currently reading? A Murder Is Announced, by Agatha Christie. Everyone in the small English town of Chipping Cleghorn reads the ads in The Gazette. Amid "help wanted's" and "dachshunds for sale" notices is one that reads, "A murder is announcd and will take place on Friday, October 29, at Little Paddocks at 6:30 PM ..." The woman who lives at "Little Paddocks" didn't place the ad, and that's only the first mysterious thing to happen. What appears at first to be a prank and a game turns into a real murder. Thank goodness Miss Jane Marple just so happens to be there.
In addition to the sleepy British charm is the mystery of this paperback. Published in 1991, it was on the shelf at the Charlestown Branch of the Boston Public Library until June 8, 1995, when it was "withdrawn for discard." How did it make its way to a library book sale in a suburb of Chicago? How many hands held it before me? I simply love the romance of used books.
2. What did you recently finish reading? Rosemary: The Hidden Kennedy Daughter by Kate Clifford Lawson. There is so much pain on the pages of this book. Joe and Rose Kennedy's third child and first daughter was "different." In the first half of the 20th century, America wasn't kind, understanding or accepting of children with learning disabilities. There was no differentiation between mentally challenged and mentally ill. The stigma the families of these children faced was unfair and bruising.
Rosie faced special challenges. Her eight siblings were exceptional. Legendary. Among her brothers and sisters were a marchioness, an activist, an ambassador, a war hero, two Senators and a President. Yet Rosemary couldn't cut her own meat. While she was physically and mentally challenged, she was not unaware. She knew her siblings loved her and she loved them -- one at a time -- but her competitive and gifted family overwhelmed her. Her frustration at being outflanked by her siblings gave way to rage. These fits made it impossible to keep her at home, yet, despite all their money and power, the Kennedys couldn't find a school to educate and care for her. They refused to institutionalize her, because in those dark days, institutions weren't hospitals, they were warehouses that kept patients alive, but little more. This led her father to make a tragic, irreversible decision about his oldest, prettiest daughter.
I'm glad this book finally told her story. For Rosemary Kennedy inspired her brothers and those brothers championed the landmark legislation that made life better for other families with special children. When one of the country's most famous families admitted they had a mentally challenged sister, it helped remove much of the stigma that undeniably existed in America at that time. Without Rosemary, her sister Eunice would not have been as furiously dedicated to making The Special Olympics the internationally influential organization it is today. Rosemary is a historic figure not because of anything specific she accomplished, but because of how much she was loved. That was powerful and enormously moving. (With Emma Stone slated to play her in the upcoming movie, Rosemary's story will reach even more of us.)
This one will stay with me for a long time.
1. What are you currently reading? A Murder Is Announced, by Agatha Christie. Everyone in the small English town of Chipping Cleghorn reads the ads in The Gazette. Amid "help wanted's" and "dachshunds for sale" notices is one that reads, "A murder is announcd and will take place on Friday, October 29, at Little Paddocks at 6:30 PM ..." The woman who lives at "Little Paddocks" didn't place the ad, and that's only the first mysterious thing to happen. What appears at first to be a prank and a game turns into a real murder. Thank goodness Miss Jane Marple just so happens to be there.
In addition to the sleepy British charm is the mystery of this paperback. Published in 1991, it was on the shelf at the Charlestown Branch of the Boston Public Library until June 8, 1995, when it was "withdrawn for discard." How did it make its way to a library book sale in a suburb of Chicago? How many hands held it before me? I simply love the romance of used books.
2. What did you recently finish reading? Rosemary: The Hidden Kennedy Daughter by Kate Clifford Lawson. There is so much pain on the pages of this book. Joe and Rose Kennedy's third child and first daughter was "different." In the first half of the 20th century, America wasn't kind, understanding or accepting of children with learning disabilities. There was no differentiation between mentally challenged and mentally ill. The stigma the families of these children faced was unfair and bruising.
Rosie faced special challenges. Her eight siblings were exceptional. Legendary. Among her brothers and sisters were a marchioness, an activist, an ambassador, a war hero, two Senators and a President. Yet Rosemary couldn't cut her own meat. While she was physically and mentally challenged, she was not unaware. She knew her siblings loved her and she loved them -- one at a time -- but her competitive and gifted family overwhelmed her. Her frustration at being outflanked by her siblings gave way to rage. These fits made it impossible to keep her at home, yet, despite all their money and power, the Kennedys couldn't find a school to educate and care for her. They refused to institutionalize her, because in those dark days, institutions weren't hospitals, they were warehouses that kept patients alive, but little more. This led her father to make a tragic, irreversible decision about his oldest, prettiest daughter.
I'm glad this book finally told her story. For Rosemary Kennedy inspired her brothers and those brothers championed the landmark legislation that made life better for other families with special children. When one of the country's most famous families admitted they had a mentally challenged sister, it helped remove much of the stigma that undeniably existed in America at that time. Without Rosemary, her sister Eunice would not have been as furiously dedicated to making The Special Olympics the internationally influential organization it is today. Rosemary is a historic figure not because of anything specific she accomplished, but because of how much she was loved. That was powerful and enormously moving. (With Emma Stone slated to play her in the upcoming movie, Rosemary's story will reach even more of us.)
This one will stay with me for a long time.
3. What will you read next? Maybe another mystery? Or a biography
The Napoleon and Ollie Show
I saw Napoleon and his "mom" on their usual street corner. It was after dark and about 40º. She was wearing a couple layers of t-shirts under her hoodie and they were both sitting on blankets to protect them from the cold cement. Napoleon, however, was styling. Decked out in a happening little rust colored vest with a fleece collar. From a distance, he looked like puppy.
I found out his vest was originally bought for a chihuahua, who promptly outgrew it and so the dog owner gave it to Napoleon, who loves it. Or at least didn't resist it and didn't let it restrict his motion. That's one of the best things about my involvement with Napoleon and his humans: seeing how generous my fellow Chicagoans can be. Mom was eating pizza from a Giordano's box -- clearly someone had shared their leftovers with her. And Napoleon's food, both canned and kibble, was plentiful.
While we were talking, a young woman came by with Ollie, a lively dog with a curly tail (a shiba inu?). He and Napoleon are good pals, and they were delightful together. Napoleon dropped to his back and wriggled on the sidewalk while Ollie nuzzled his tummy. Then he let Ollie sniff his butt -- but only for a Napoleon-prescribed period of time. Then he turned and gave his canine companion a swift slap on the nose. This commenced a brief interlude of rough house, interrupted when Ollie caught sight of Napoleon's food dish and decided cat food looked good to him. His owner intervened.
She also gave Napoleon a new shirt, a gift from Ollie. It's a tiny dog onesie that says, "I love my mom," and it's decorated with a pawprint. It delighted Napoleon's mom. "Get! Out!" she laughed in delight. I have learned that this is a happy part of her day: chatting with other women, purely as a pet mom. Not as a homeless woman.
Even though Napoleon virtually ignored me, I'm glad I got to see this performance of the Napoleon and Ollie Show. For it does look like the curtain will be coming down soon. Caleb, his wife and Napoleon expect to be on a bus to Cleveland tomorrow or Thursday. They are waiting for a form, duly signed by a judge, to come back to the Chicago Legal Clinic.
Getting Caleb's long-ago, teenage shoplifting conviction expunged from his record has turned out to be free and surprisingly easy -- once he learned how to do it. I'm proud that I was able to put him in touch with a lawyer who was able to handle to paperwork so now he can go on and get a job.
This job as a window washer means everything to Caleb and his little family. Those paychecks will make it possible for them to give up their tent and sleep indoors, where it's dry and warm. It will give them access to running water, so his wife can groom regularly. Then she can apply to pass the boards in Ohio and resume her career as a licensed hairstylist. Their goal is to begin 2018 in a furnished apartment.
"I have been talking to other people in our situation," she told me last night. "There are so many obstacles to a fresh start!" She was referring to how Caleb had gotten the window washing job, completed his internship, arranged for his union dues, and then at the last moment, during the routine background check, his minor conviction came back to haunt him. His prospective boss, who really believes in this young man, will still give Caleb the job ... as long as the conviction is expunged from his record.
"If it wasn't for your help, we might have given up."
Hearing that meant the world to me.
I found out his vest was originally bought for a chihuahua, who promptly outgrew it and so the dog owner gave it to Napoleon, who loves it. Or at least didn't resist it and didn't let it restrict his motion. That's one of the best things about my involvement with Napoleon and his humans: seeing how generous my fellow Chicagoans can be. Mom was eating pizza from a Giordano's box -- clearly someone had shared their leftovers with her. And Napoleon's food, both canned and kibble, was plentiful.
While we were talking, a young woman came by with Ollie, a lively dog with a curly tail (a shiba inu?). He and Napoleon are good pals, and they were delightful together. Napoleon dropped to his back and wriggled on the sidewalk while Ollie nuzzled his tummy. Then he let Ollie sniff his butt -- but only for a Napoleon-prescribed period of time. Then he turned and gave his canine companion a swift slap on the nose. This commenced a brief interlude of rough house, interrupted when Ollie caught sight of Napoleon's food dish and decided cat food looked good to him. His owner intervened.
She also gave Napoleon a new shirt, a gift from Ollie. It's a tiny dog onesie that says, "I love my mom," and it's decorated with a pawprint. It delighted Napoleon's mom. "Get! Out!" she laughed in delight. I have learned that this is a happy part of her day: chatting with other women, purely as a pet mom. Not as a homeless woman.
Even though Napoleon virtually ignored me, I'm glad I got to see this performance of the Napoleon and Ollie Show. For it does look like the curtain will be coming down soon. Caleb, his wife and Napoleon expect to be on a bus to Cleveland tomorrow or Thursday. They are waiting for a form, duly signed by a judge, to come back to the Chicago Legal Clinic.
Getting Caleb's long-ago, teenage shoplifting conviction expunged from his record has turned out to be free and surprisingly easy -- once he learned how to do it. I'm proud that I was able to put him in touch with a lawyer who was able to handle to paperwork so now he can go on and get a job.
This job as a window washer means everything to Caleb and his little family. Those paychecks will make it possible for them to give up their tent and sleep indoors, where it's dry and warm. It will give them access to running water, so his wife can groom regularly. Then she can apply to pass the boards in Ohio and resume her career as a licensed hairstylist. Their goal is to begin 2018 in a furnished apartment.
"I have been talking to other people in our situation," she told me last night. "There are so many obstacles to a fresh start!" She was referring to how Caleb had gotten the window washing job, completed his internship, arranged for his union dues, and then at the last moment, during the routine background check, his minor conviction came back to haunt him. His prospective boss, who really believes in this young man, will still give Caleb the job ... as long as the conviction is expunged from his record.
"If it wasn't for your help, we might have given up."
Hearing that meant the world to me.
Labels:
charity,
Current affairs,
Napoleon
Sunday, November 05, 2017
Sunday Stealing
SUNDAY STEALING: FIRST THINGS FIRST
{1} First thing you would do/buy if you won the lottery:
This makes me kinda sad, since I had long wanted to replace the fence at my mother's house with my lottery winnings. But she's gone and the house isn't hers anymore. SO I'll double my retirement savings and if there's any left over, I'll (finally!) finish my bathroom. If there's still any left over, I'll take my nephew to Washington DC. He so wants to go, and it would be the perfect high school graduation gift for him.
{2} First person you call when you get amazing news:
Depends on the news. My life is kinda compartmentalized.
{3} First thing you do when you've had a bad day:
Reach for Reynaldo.
{4} First movie you went to without your parents:
A re-release of Hayley Mills' Parent Trap.
{5} First sport you played (Little League-style or in school):
Other than mandatory PE class, it would be volleyball. (I suck at sports.)
{6} First major injury:
When I was a preschooler, I fell down the stairs and broke my clavicle.
{7} First product I use in the shower:
Aveeno Ultra Calming Facial Cleanser
{8} First apartment or house on your own (away from you parents!):
A studio with lovely hardwood floors and a spiral staircase. I was very happy there for a long time. But I'm glad I no longer rent. Amazingly, that little apartment costs more in rent than my current mortgage payment on a 2BR condo.
{9} First Roommate(s):
I've never had a roommate. Never shared a room with my sister. Never went away to college so I wasn't in a dorm. While I've "shacked up" (as my parents' generation liked to say) with a man or two, I never gave up my own apartment.
{10} First Time Living Away from Home:
The apartment mentioned in #8.
{11} First magazine subscription:
In junior high, I paid for a subscription to FAVE with my allowance.
{12} First real piece of jewelry you owned:
I have no precious stones of my own. When my mom died, my sisters decided I should have her engagement/wedding rings. I never wear them. I suppose if times get tough, I can sell them. (My parents did not have a happy marriage and it's hard for me to get sentimental about these rings.)
{13} First time staying home alone:
My parents and sisters went out to dinner but I begged to stay home and they let me. I looooooved it.
{14} First thing I reach for in the fridge:
Coke.
{15} First car accident or traffic violation:
I don't drive.
Bonus: Toilet paper, over or under?
Over. I feel very strongly about this.
{1} First thing you would do/buy if you won the lottery:
This makes me kinda sad, since I had long wanted to replace the fence at my mother's house with my lottery winnings. But she's gone and the house isn't hers anymore. SO I'll double my retirement savings and if there's any left over, I'll (finally!) finish my bathroom. If there's still any left over, I'll take my nephew to Washington DC. He so wants to go, and it would be the perfect high school graduation gift for him.
{2} First person you call when you get amazing news:
Depends on the news. My life is kinda compartmentalized.
![]() |
Reynaldo can be very understanding |
Reach for Reynaldo.
{4} First movie you went to without your parents:
A re-release of Hayley Mills' Parent Trap.
{5} First sport you played (Little League-style or in school):
Other than mandatory PE class, it would be volleyball. (I suck at sports.)
{6} First major injury:
When I was a preschooler, I fell down the stairs and broke my clavicle.
{7} First product I use in the shower:
Aveeno Ultra Calming Facial Cleanser
{8} First apartment or house on your own (away from you parents!):
A studio with lovely hardwood floors and a spiral staircase. I was very happy there for a long time. But I'm glad I no longer rent. Amazingly, that little apartment costs more in rent than my current mortgage payment on a 2BR condo.
{9} First Roommate(s):
I've never had a roommate. Never shared a room with my sister. Never went away to college so I wasn't in a dorm. While I've "shacked up" (as my parents' generation liked to say) with a man or two, I never gave up my own apartment.
{10} First Time Living Away from Home:
The apartment mentioned in #8.
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I loved you, Bobby. |
In junior high, I paid for a subscription to FAVE with my allowance.
{12} First real piece of jewelry you owned:
I have no precious stones of my own. When my mom died, my sisters decided I should have her engagement/wedding rings. I never wear them. I suppose if times get tough, I can sell them. (My parents did not have a happy marriage and it's hard for me to get sentimental about these rings.)
{13} First time staying home alone:
My parents and sisters went out to dinner but I begged to stay home and they let me. I looooooved it.
{14} First thing I reach for in the fridge:
Coke.
{15} First car accident or traffic violation:
I don't drive.
Bonus: Toilet paper, over or under?
Over. I feel very strongly about this.
Or I could just sleep
This was one of those rainy days when nothing went right. I overslept ... the sky was gray and the drizzle was continuous ... my optometrist stood me up (the office was locked tight and no one was answering the phone) ... I'm worried about my friend in California, and about Henry, who has fresh new money troubles on top of his ongoing ones ... The book I'm reading has become unremittingly sad ... I'm discouraged about my own inertia. I got a freelance assignment from a friend-of-a-friend and I just haven't done anything on it. I literally can't afford to be so lackadaisical about this side job.
So what did I do? I napped.
I woke up and ate dinner. Then I went back to bed.
Am I worn down by worry? Will all this sleep leave me feeling rejuvenated?
Or am I sliding into depression?
Stay tuned ...
Saturday, November 04, 2017
Saturday 9
Saturday 9: Suddenly I See (2005)

2) In this video, you can see a turntable and an LP. When is the last time you played a record? I don't even remember. My turntable is no longer hooked up to the speakers. I should get rid of the damn thing.
3) Growing up, Ms. Tunstall seldom sang at home because her father is severely hearing impaired and music interfered with his sensitive hearing aid. Do you, or does anyone in your family, wear a hearing aid? No
4) In high school, she got experience performing on street corners. Have you ever tipped a street musician? No. I'm always compelled to share my change with the homeless, instead.
5) When this song was popular, Microsoft introduced the Xbox 360 to North America. Are you into gaming? Farmville 2. Sometimes I play canasta on Pogo.
6) In 2005, Prince Charles married his long-time love, Camilla Parker Bowles. At the time of their wedding, 73% of Brits said they disapproved of her. Today, her popularity has increased somewhat and her disapproval has dropped to 55%. Do you know anyone who married someone you didn't like? Did their spouse grow on you with time? A buddy of mine was dating a slightly older woman, divorced, with a son. My friend was crazy about her and wanted us to love her, too. It was hard, though, because every time we all got together, she was virtually silent. We thought she was aloof and elite, determined to incorporate him into her life but uninterested in becoming part of his life. When he said he was going to marry her, I nearly cried. That was in 2008. Here we are, nine years later, and they are still going strong. We have, as I feared, virtually "lost" him. They moved out to a distant suburb and had a baby and he doesn't have time or opportunity to hang out anymore. I miss him, but I'm glad he's happy with her, happier than I ever would have predicted.
7) Harry Potter ad the Goblet of Fire was popular in theaters. Who is your favorite "Harry Potter" character? I don't have a favorite character. I haven't read the books or seen the movies.
8) In 2005, YouTube was introduced by three young men who met while working at PayPal. What's the last thing you paid for using PayPal? Skincare from the Body Shop's website.
9) Random Question: After a long, exhausting day of travel, you check into a motel. The room is not at all to your liking. It's next to the ice machine, so you can hear cubes dropping noisily into metal buckets. Your view is of the parking lot. The bathtowels and thin and tiny. In short, you feel like you're being ripped off. Do you grab your bag, turn on your heel and check out, hoping there are better accommodations nearby? Or do you say, "What the hell, it's only one night," and climb into bed? I'd just say "What the hell." And mentally compose my TripAdvisor review, so that some other unsuspecting traveler doesn't find herself in this same predicament.
Labels:
Heroine,
Kennedy,
meme,
Saturday 9
Friday, November 03, 2017
Dona Nobis Pacem
I live in a city awash in guns. Over 100 people were shot over the four-day July 4 holiday here in Chicago. 12 of those citizens died. Just another hot summer weekend in the Windy City.
It makes me sad. It makes me angry. Worst of all, it leaves me numb. I'm so inured to violence that when I heard about the San Bernadino shooting in 2015, I honest to God thought, "14 killed? What's the big deal?"
I actually have to remind myself to be appalled by the indifference to life displayed when one person points a firearm at another person and fires.
The September carnage in Las Vegas was so egregious it had the power to shock me. Yet when citizens tried to engage politicians in a conversation about guns in this country, all I heard was, "Now is not the time."
Apparently talking about Las Vegas is "politicizing" tragedy. Never mind that President Donald Trump and his spokeswoman, Sarah Huckabee-Sanders, talk about Chicago all the time. The White House brings up our firearm homicides when talking about immigration and sanctuary cities. The White House brings up our firearm homicides when the subject of gun control comes up. "Politicizing" the deaths of our young people is acceptable, I guess, because our blood is shed 24/7, while the Las Vegas murders happened in a matter of minutes. "Politicizing" our deaths is OK because Illinois is a blue state while Nevada is red.
The White House is wrong.
NOW IS THE TIME. Today and every day is the time to talk about bringing peace to our streets.
• How did the NRA amass so much influence? Is it because of their money? Is it because of their ability to get single-issue voters to the polls? We should examine this.
• What role does gerrymandering play in the election and re-election of staunchly pro-gun politicians? We deserve to know.
• There's a chasm between urban and rural Americans when it comes to the subject of guns. We need to talk about this, and listen to one another with respect.
• What impact does our approach to mental health have on this gun carnage? As our lawmakers talk about dismantling Obamacare, are they considering this?
NOW IS THE TIME. Today and every day is the time to talk about bringing peace to our streets.
LEARN MORE ABOUT BLOGGING FOR PEACE HERE.
We're a community of writers who believe words matter.
Labels:
blog blast for peace,
Current affairs
Thursday, November 02, 2017
Who's the chick with Harry?
In Chicago, we're very proud of the Obamas. They're like our royal family.
Until, of course, an actual royal shows up.
This week, Prince Harry was in town! He was here for a summit, one of the first events sponsored by the Obama Presidential Center. He and the former FLOTUS took a side trip to Hyde Park Academy, a high school in the South Side neighborhood where Michelle grew up. Mrs. Obama and Mr. Windsor encouraged the students to "stay inspired and hopeful," and to use their voices to change the world.
To say Harry was a hit with the kids would be an understatement. His mother would be proud of his ability to relate and inspire everyone he meets.
Until, of course, an actual royal shows up.
This week, Prince Harry was in town! He was here for a summit, one of the first events sponsored by the Obama Presidential Center. He and the former FLOTUS took a side trip to Hyde Park Academy, a high school in the South Side neighborhood where Michelle grew up. Mrs. Obama and Mr. Windsor encouraged the students to "stay inspired and hopeful," and to use their voices to change the world.
To say Harry was a hit with the kids would be an understatement. His mother would be proud of his ability to relate and inspire everyone he meets.
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Photos by the Obama Foundation |
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