Just what I needed

Usually Monday I get together with my online movie group. But this week I took Nancy and her husband Paul up on their invitation to meet for dinner. I'm so glad I did.

First of all, I'd just come out of a rough weekend. At the hospital Thursday, they installed a 10" ureteral stent. I experienced what the materials euphemistically called "stent bother." I was miserable. It was literally all I could think about for three days. I was bleeding, cramping, leaking, stinging ... the pain pills didn't erase the pain, they just made me care about it a little less. Monday morning was the first one in days where I woke up feeling human. 

Then there was the work thing. I understand and accept that this chapter of my work life is over, and I'm good with it. After all, I need to get healthy and I'm grateful severance affords me to do it without the stress of work deadlines. But I received some financial statements over the weekend and just got around to looking at them on Monday. Like everyone else invested in the stock market, the news was not good. So while I'm relieved about the time off, I'm less sanguine about no more salary after 10/27.

I hadn't been outdoors all day. Autumn is my favorite time of year, too! So it did me good to put on make up, get dressed, and walk up my neighborhood's main drag. The trees are still full and starting to change color. The sky was cloudless and a beautiful pale blue. It touched my heart.

This is just past the main library

I'm so comfortable with Nancy and Paul. They were amused yet shocked that I was, effectively, let go while on a gurney in the Recovery Room of Rush University Hospital. That kinda set the mood. Paul told the story of how he divorced Wife #1 shortly after their 25th anniversary and the judge made a joke about how instead of being printed on paper the decree should be engraved on silver. Nancy was telling a story about how messed up her work place is, and Paul was teasing her that she sounded like Columbo: "Wait! Here's another thing ..." I enjoyed this because you know how usually when you hang with a couple, you like one more than the other? While I'm closer to Nancy, it's so relaxing to be with a couple where you get along with them both.

Sunday Stealing

FROM THE MEME VAULT

What period of history is your favorite to read about? I like to read fiction set in present day. Now biographies! That's another story! I most enjoy reading about Americans from the mid-1800s to late-1900s.

What is your favorite genre of fiction? Biographies, mysteries, chick lit. I rotate them.

Do you choose a book by its cover? I have. I honestly chose this one because I liked the orange and teal. It turned out to be very entertaining.

Read about it here.

Where do you do most of your reading? Wherever I happen to be. One of the benefits of a big purse is that I always have reading material with me.

Without looking, guess how many books are in your TBR pile. Now, look. Were you right? I guessed 15. It's really 30!

How many movies are on your TBW list? Six or seven.

What's your favorite genre of movie? Classic. I find myself gravitating to the late 1930s to the late 1950s.

Do you still go to see movies in the theater?  Yes! Going to the movies in a theater is one of my favorite things to do.

You have $10,000 and no strings or obligations for one full day. Where do you go and what do you do? I put $9,500 in the bank. Then I allow myself the luxury of splurging and playing with the last $500. Christmas is coming and I think it would be great fun to do my gift buying with this found money.

How many songs are on your favorite playlist?  Since my iPod crapped out, I don't really have a playlist.

What method do you use to listen to music (Spotify, iTunes, Pandora...)? Depends on where I am. At the office, I listen to Pandora. At home, I either listen to CDs or call on Alexa.

Maybe because it's Sunday ...

I have been thinking a lot about my relationship with God and how we communicate.

Last week, I was feeling overwhelmed by life. I was worried about my health and my finances, exhausted from the pain and stress.

To bolster my spirits, I brought my loved ones with me to the hospital. I found a pair of socks my late mother had given me more than a decade ago. I wore a white cloth mask from my niece and a t-shirt from my nephew's college. 

After the procedure was over, after I knew I was safe and would recover, I prayed in gratitude. I thanked God for delivering me. It wasn't a formal prayer, not a Bible verse. Just a humble acknowledgement that I know whose child I am.

My Cousin Rose is far more conventional in the practice of her faith. Her approach to prayer is also far different from mine. Hers is both more formal and more constant. She invokes Bible verses and prayers she learned during church services. 

I prefer to wing it. I don't want to recite when I pray. It feels more sincere and heartfelt to use my own words when I talk to God. 

But I think I'm going to lift up prayers more often. Rose says it comforts her. I could have used comfort this week, and it was there for me. I just didn't avail myself of it.

It's just I look at our nation -- from QAnon crazy election deniers on the ballot to Hurricane Ian -- and I think, doesn't God have more important things to do than comfort me? Isn't it enough that He delivered me on the other side of my turmoil? Why be greedy and demanding?

But I realize that is narrow thinking. That is looking at God as if He were a person. He is infinite. He has the capacity to listen to me when I'm scared and overwhelmed. He doesn't "mind." I am His child. He loves me. He is, in fact, always there anyway, even when I'm not reaching out.

"Trust that the Lord will provide" and "You are never alone." That's what Rose always reminds me.

I know intellectually that she is right. I just need to get more comfortable incorporating this into my daily thinking.

I learned something this week. I am happy I did.

Saturday 9

 Saturday 9: Love Sneakin' Up on You (1994)

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

1) The song begins with Bonnie Raitt waiting anxiously for a call. If your phone were to ring right now, who would you expect to be on the other end? My oldest friend. She owes me a call.

 

2) She likens trying to avoid love to trying to stop the rain. Is rain expected where you are this weekend? I don't think so.

 

3) Bonnie was accepted by Radcliffe College but once she got there, she decided higher education wasn't for her and she dropped out to become a performer. Tell us about something you're not sorry you walked away from. I was a Sears catalog copywriter for five years. It was my first copywriting job. My then-boyfriend and friends John, Kathy and Mindy were all at Sears, too (though Mindy had moved to their in-house PR department). Leaving that cushy job and familiar atmosphere was like leaving home. But I'm glad I did it. I had nascent career ambitions they didn't, and I had to leave to fulfill them. (John stayed another 8 years.)

4) Bonnie's father was Broadway star John Raitt. Because of his career, the family was based on the East Coast. Once Bonnie got out to the West Coast, she realized she felt more at home and settled in the San Francisco area. Today, do you live far from where you grew up? My condo is about 20 minutes from the house my parents owned.

5) Prince invited Bonnie to his home, Paisley Park, to discuss working together. The project never happened, but she treasures the memory of her time with a musician she greatly admired. What's your favorite Prince song? I only really like this one. But I like it extravagantly.

 

6) When she's on the road, Bonnie likes to order Thai food. What's for dinner tonight at your house? Something bland. I had outpatient surgery and I'm still recovering.

7) In 1994, when this song was popular, ER debuted and became a big hit for NBC. Do you enjoy doctor shows? I did. I used to watch ER and Grey's Anatomy. I don't watch any of the current ones. No reason, really. There's just so much competition for our viewing time!

8) Also in 1994, Olympic figure skating hopeful Nancy Kerrigan was the victim of an attack. Her rival was rumored to be involved. Without looking it up, do you remember the name of that rival? Tonya Harding.

 

9) Random question -- Which famous Tom would you rather be seated beside at dinner: Tom Cruise, Tom Jones, or Tom Brady? Tom Brady is so annoying. I enjoy Tom Cruise's movies, but I'm afraid if I met him I wouldn't like him anymore. Tom Jones is a legend. I'll go with him. At the very least I can ask him about Elvis' pool party.

It's time

I am wistful about my career ending on October 27, but I'm not sorry. It simply must be done on my agency's timeline, not mine, because I have 18 years there. In advertising we don't have a union, and in Illinois, retirement is tantamount to quitting. If I were to simply retire, I would leave 19 weeks of severance on the table. That's more than 4 months pay. I can't afford to walk away from that. The longer I put off collecting Social Security, the more I receive. 

I am not happy at my job. I don't approve of the way our clients are treated. I identify completely with my clients, but I work for agency management. It's the agency who pays me. I understand that with my attitude, and with the departure of my client, it's time to go.

via GIPHY

If money were no object, I would have retired back in January, when my boss Aaron left. He was a breath of fresh air. We were aligned in our approach to the job and to our teammates. But upper management and my new boss are completely different. I don't approve of them. Being as judgey as I am is not good -- not for me, not for them, and not for the work. So it's time.

But money is an object. Or, to be more precise, benefits are. I'm in the middle of expensive dental work and I just had a lithotripsy performed (see post below). I will be eligible for Medicare in a matter of weeks (November 1) but I don't want to switch insurance carriers midstream, as they say.

In the 18 years I was here, I've done some work I'm proud of. Even better for me personally, I've fought the good fight. I tried to be the voice of my client in the room. When many others were arguing for bigger, more outrageous, more audacious ideas, I was the one who said, "Wait! This may win us awards, but how does it move the client's business along?" Sometimes smaller, more conservative, tried-and-true was the better, more cost efficient bet. 

In closing, I invoke Joe Maddon. When he and the Cubs parted ways after the 2019 season, after 5 seasons, during which he managed my heroes in Cubbie blue to 4 playoff appearances and one incredibly glorious World Series, Joe said, "There's nothing to bemoan or lament. It's just time. It's been fabulous."

via GIPHY

Thursday: Let's talk about the hospital

The good people at Rush say my lithotripsy was a success. I'm not remotely comfortable right now, so you can't prove it by me. Of course, the procedure was just over 24 hours ago and I still have a stent. About half the patients who get one after a urological procedure will have stent pain. I feel all the time like I have to pee, and there's a stinging. It's as though I traded one pain for another, though they assure me this is to be expected. After all, my kidney stone was pulverized and I'm passing bits of it. The stent comes out Sunday morning. I live for Sunday morning.

I wish I had gotten my anesthesiologist's name because I was pretty hard on him. He responded with great sensitivity. You see, he wanted to give me an epidural. If you read this humble blog regularly, you will remember that last month, my favorite-most ball player had an epidural and it went poorly. "Epidural" is the last word I wanted to hear.

"Anthony Rizzo is a strong 32-year old man and it went badly," I said. "I'm a sick 64-year-old woman. Why should I expect a better outcome?"

He walked me through it. I won't repeat his explanation since I might get it wrong -- and really, who needs more medical misinformation out there (remember Trump and hydroxychloroquine?) -- but it satisfied me. Then the anesthesiologist said he could tell I was nervous, but that he went into this specialty help and make me more comfortable. He said he he's met Anthony Rizzo because he volunteers his time at Lurie Children's Hospital, which Rizz supports through his foundation. I asked the anesthesiologist is I'm easier or tougher than the pediatric cancer patients. He smiled and said, "Tougher, because you ask tougher questions."

After the procedure, when I was still mostly out of it -- my eyes weren't even open -- he whispered to me, "Gal? Can you hear me? You may have a headache, but it won't be like Rizzo's." It made me happy that the first name I heard as I regained consciousness was Rizz's.

And the epidural was fine. It took me a while to shake it off, and it was weird to be looking at my feet and unable to move them, but eventually the numbness wore off and I was able to go home.

While I was waiting for discharge, I checked my phone. At 10:45 AM, the head of HR sent me a message, wanting to know why I hadn't accepted her meeting invitation. The head of HR doesn't know me. We could be alone together in the elevator and while she'd say hi, she couldn't tell you my name. There is only one reason why she wanted to meet with me.

I was, effectively, canned while I was in the Recovery Room. I think I have the most advertising-y advertising agency story ever.

My friend John was downstairs outside the hospital lobby Starbucks, waiting for me. We were quite a pair -- he with his cane and me in a wheelchair! He put me in an Uber, and I was happy to go home. Now if only I could lose the stent!

 

Thursday Thirteen #278

13 common restaurant complaints. This is what patrons speak up about most often. They can all be valid. But it's important to remember that only #3 is the sole responsibility of your server. That's why I always try to be polite when I'm unhappy. The person I'm complaining to is likely not the one I'm really upset with.

1. Disappointing food and drink

2. Slow customer service

3. Order mix up

4. Unsanitary restroom

5. Long wait time

7. Overpriced menu items

8. Issues with seating

9. Out of menu items

10. Credit card issues (some restaurants don't accept American Express and Discover)

11. Food not ready when promised for pick up

12. Dietary restrictions not accommodated

13. Food doesn't look like the picture on the website or menu

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

 

 

 

Comfortably numb

Today may have been my last day in the office. Ever. After 18 years with this company. After more than 40 years as a writer. After more than 45 years of full-time white collar work.

I went through my stuff and threw much of it away, which made me sad. I always figured when this time came, I'd leave my files to my successor. Since my client severed the relationship, I won't have a successor. It seems a shame that I won't be able to share what I've learned.

I also found two brand new pair of socks. One lightweight, one heavy. I hate it when my boots leak. The lightweight were to replace my wet socks when I changed from boots to shoes. The heavy ones were to get me home through the snow. I guess winter 2019/2020 -- the last before work-from-home -- must not have been that sloppy because the socks are unworn.

The socks reminded me I'm proud of how little work I've missed due to weather. I made the commute no matter what. I was ready for it. I dressed for it. I knew how to navigate it. Yes, Chicago winters (and springs) can be brutal. But I have friends and family in South Florida and I'm reminded we aren't asked to evacuate our homes annually. I'll keep the snow, thank you.

I dumped the last remaining swigs of cheap vodka but brought the bottle of whiskey home. Hell, yeah, I had booze in my desk. No, I'm not embarrassed. As with the weather, I know how to handle work stress.

Bruce came home. This Rolling Stone cover graced my every office since 1986. Bruce Willis has been smirking for me for 36 years. His all-purpose bad attitude has been as comforting as the booze. Now he's retired and I'll soon be hanging it up.

7/10 of a mile. I've worked for seven different employers between South Wacker Drive and North Michigan Avenue. Except for that year in the 1990s when I worked out by the O'Hare, my entire life has been in The Loop. Ping ponging between my comfortable little neighborhood and the exciting city has given me the best of both worlds. I love downtown. I wonder how often I'll be back.

I don't think I've absorbed all this yet. I'm so worried about the lithotripsy on Thursday that I just can't right now. Also, I'm worried about severance (management still hasn't told me when my last day will be). Then there's insurance and Medicare. I think I'll have a nice breakdown next week.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

1. What are you currently reading? The Rooster Bar by John Grisham. Four law school friends -- Todd, Gordon, Mark and Zola -- are feeling ripped off. It's dawning on them that the school they have gone deeply into hock to attend is at best mediocre, at worst a fraud, and that big Washington DC firms will not be eager to hire them after all. With this deficient but insanely expensive education, they may not even pass the bar.

Gordon is sure he's uncovered that their school is one of many, and they may be victimes of a conspiracy. Can the friends expose it? Will they be able to use whatever meager law skills they have gleaned to file a class action suit? Or have they taken on something darker and more sinister than mere white collar crime?

I'd never heard of this Grisham book (published in 2017) and so far I'm enjoying it. The master not only spins an interesting tale, he creates characters I already feel invested in.

2. What did you recently finish reading? Orson Welles: A Biography by Barbara Leaming. This is an ambitious look at an ambitious genius. After enduring a truly bizarre childhood, Orson Welles mastered radio, television, theater and motion pictures before he was 30. He was also considered an unemployable has been by 35. He had three daughters by three very different women -- a socialite, a movie star and an Italian countess. He created very great art but was always broke. He lived long enough to receive lifetime achievement awards from the very industry that denounced him.

Like Welles himself, this book is a big, charismatic mess. 600+ pages that take us from Woodstock, IL, to Barcelona to Cap d'Antibes to Las Vegas, with stops in Senegal and Casablanca in between. I often had no idea what continent we were on or why.

Barbara Leaming interviewed Welles extensively for this book, and I don't think it benefited from his participation. It's as undisciplined,  audacious and unfocused as Welles' most confusing works. So while I'm not sorry I read this book, I don't recommend it. After I was done with this heavy tome, I realize I still don't know much about my two favorite Welles movies: Citizen Kane and The Third Man. I do, however, know much more than I ever cared to about his pre-teen sexual awakening. I think at times Leaming was telling us not what we wanted to know, but what Orson thought we should know.

By the way, I've read other Leaming biographies and this isn't reflective of her work. I still consider her an author I enjoy.

3. What will read next? I don't know.

Sunday Stealing

FALL MEME

1. Fave fall Holiday: Thanksgiving

2. Best thing about fall walks: that I'm not hot (summer), rained upon (spring), or slipping on snow (winter). Fall is just the best month for walking!

3. Favorite fall chore: I live in an apartment and consequently am not called upon to do any season-specific chores. Though I tend to resist all chores any way.

4. Least favorite fall chore: See above.

5. Best change in the home: Sleeping without the a/c. I'm grateful to Mr. Carrier for his fabulous invention, but I'm always glad when I'm done with it for the year.

6. Best tree in the fall: I'm not good with the tree thing, but I'll say maple because I used to live on Maple Avenue.

7. Fall ritual: Returning to Starbucks for hot chocolate. I don't care for coffee at all and seldom set foot in the place, but I am fond of their hot chocolate (I recommend a dash of cinnamon, available from a shaker near the napkins.)

8. Most frustrating thing about fall: I'm sorry, I got nothing for this.

9. Favorite fall decorations: Those little gourds people display make me happy.

10. Favorite clothing: It's good to get my sweaters out again.

11. Traditional fall candy: Cinnamon! Though I have to avoid chewy candy because of my teeth.

12. Favorite sound: Same as all year around -- a cat's pur

13. When does fall begin for you? I let the unpredictable Chicagoland weather tell me

14. What is your favorite aspect of fall?  Long walks in the fall sunshine

15. What is your favorite fall memories? They all surround my November birthday. This morning I remember second grade, when Janet came to my party. We had been in Kindergarten and first grade together, but her family moved just 5 miles away and that put her in a different school district. None of us had seen her since the previous June and to us, those 5 months seemed like a lifetime. It was so exciting! She gave me this Addams Family game.

16. What do you like to drink in the fall?  I've begun drinking tea in the chilly evenings.

17. What's your favorite fall food?  Stuffing with gravy

18. What color is fall? Orange

19. What does fall smell like? Pumpkin, apples and cinnamon

20. If you could go anywhere in the fall, where would you go? I'd like to just take a little weekend getaway. I'm thinking of returning to Springfield to see Mr. Lincoln's home and Presidential Library again. It's been awhile and hanging with Abe always lifts my spirits.

 

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Forever Your Girl (1989)

1) In this song, Paula Abdul tells her boyfriend he's got to remember, she's forever his girl. How's your memory? Do you remember things easily or do you leave yourself notes and reminders? Reminders help.

2) Paula reassures her lover that she can't be swayed by another man, even if he gave her diamonds or pearls. Tell us about a piece of jewelry that means something to you. I have a pair of silly little dolphin earrings that I love, though I never wear them. When my niece was a very little girl, she bought them for me at a school fair with her own money. She was so proud of her purchase! PS She turns 30 next month. Gulp!

 

3) Paula is best known as one of the original judges of American Idol. Without looking it up, can you recall the men who sat on either side of her? Randy and Simon

4) Paula has been dancing since age 8 and moves very well in heels. Tell us about your favorite shoes. My trusty Nikes. I bought them from Dick's Sporting Goods back in 2019. Nike was in the news for backing Colin Kaepernick. Dick's was under attack for changing their policy re: guns. Every time I slip them on I'm reminded that we can make ourselves heard with our wallets.

 

5) A lifelong dancer, Paula admits she's not a trained singer. For this record, she worked with producer Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds, who won accolades for his work with singers including Madonna, Kelly Clarkson, Toni Braxton and Janet Jackson. Who is your all-time favorite female singer?

 

 

6) She advises young girls to "keep the faith and don't lose your gut instinct." How about you? Are you more logical or instinctive? Let's just say my emotions have been known to overtake my common sense. Or, as my oldest friend warns me, "You're spinning, Gal."

 

7) Paula is excited that Richard Branson has chosen her song, "Straight Up" as the theme for his Virgin Galactic Spaceflight company. Would you like to orbit above the earth? Nope

8) In 1989, when this song was a hit, the Sears Holiday Wish Book was big on  bathrobes. Men and women alike were tempted with brightly colored, belted robes with hoods and patch pockets. Tell us about your bathrobe. I believe I bought it at Sears years ago. It's knee-length, gray and white. It reaches my knees. And it's belted, with a hood and patch pockets.

9) Random question: What do you consider your best quality? I maintain my sense of humor.

 

 

Chicken soup is good for the soul

Thursday evening, my friend Nancy and her hubs were back in my neighborhood. He wanted to get his flu/Covid shots at the same pharmacy as he had in the past. A new delicatessen just opened, and they reached out and wanted to know if I wanted to join them after his jab.

I'm so glad I said "yes." I've skipped other social events -- a baby shower and a wedding celebration -- because I didn't want to be stuck in public if the kidney stone pain hits. But the deli is just around the corner from my home, so I knew if I started to feel poorly I could be back in bed in no time. 

As a couple, Nancy and Paul both like me. I can talk work with Nancy and Paul and I share all the same pop culture touch stones (yesterday we were talking Monty Python) and sports. Plus being with them makes me happy because I knew Nancy at the end of her difficult first marriage. Seeing her so happy with Paul is life affirming.

And while this isn't by design by I think it's a plus: they're Jewish. I read a blogger who recently posted something like, "All my friends are Christians and they all read the Bible." I'm a Christian and am happy to see someone live their faith. But I'm not a fan of that lack of diversity. When discussing big issues -- like abortion -- it's important to understand that others can be just as devout as you and believe something else. Respect for those views is not only kind and decent, it's Constitutionally mandated. At a time when a phrase like "Christian Nationalism" is being tossed around this, this is important.

So I felt nourished by the chicken soup, rice pudding, conversation, laughter, and affection.

Thursday Thirteen #277

Thirteen places to see the fall colors. Every autumn, my old friend Kathy would mention she thought it would be fun to hit the road and check out the foliage. I admit I couldn't care less. I look at the trees and see the colors and they make me happy, but I've never been motivated to take a trip to seek them out. Kathy is suffering from cognitive decline, and in a way, I'm posting this to remind me of how she always wanted to do this, but never did.

1. Blue Ridge Parkway, VA

2. The Berkshires, MA

3. Door County, WI

4. White Mountain, NH

5. Bar Harbor, ME

6. Adirondacks, NY

7. The Catskills, NY

8. Green Mountain Byway, VT

9. Gatlinburg & the Smoky Mountains, TN

10. Poconos, PA

11. Taos, NM

12. Brooklyn Botanical Garden, NY

13. Napa Valley, CA

What about you? Do you have a "bucket list" item it would be easy to mark off, but you just haven't gotten around to it?

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

Of dentists and urologists

Monday was a busy day. Dentist in the morning, urologist in the afternoon.  

Dental drama: My front tooth is cracked and the enamel is worn away. This is not unusual. I am an old broad and decades of use, as well as menopause (which is not good for your teeth), have taken their toll.

However this means that I now have THREE teeth in work now. It's going to be a race to the finish. How much of this work can I get done before I lose my job and this really awesome dental insurance? 

Back to the hospital: In addition to an internist, a dermatologist, a chiropractor, and a dentist, I now have a urologist! A team, actually. I met with the physician's assistant who very patiently explained my condition and my treatment options. One thing he kindly kept emphasizing is that there's a difference between "acute" and "chronic," and he believes my kidney stone is an acute condition. Once it's gone, it's gone. There's not reason to believe that this will continue to bedevil me for life. Yay!

Then he referred me to my new urologist, who will perform my laser lithotripsy. Yes, a laser will zap my big-ass stone, pulverizing it into tiny pieces. Most will be removed during the procedure, I'll pass the rest. That will be October 6. A few days later, I'll have to return to have the stent removed. Then hopefully all this will just be a bad dream.

My friend John is going to meet me at the hospital after the procedure put me safely in a cab home. We have been friends 41 years now. This is one of those moments when I'm glad I have long-standing relationships.

This is everything

The Yankees clinched first place in the AL East. This is really not news. I believe they have been in first place all season. Yankee fans are such hysterical babies. The Yankees hit a skid and there was a groundswell of cries for the manager's head on a stick. Oh, please, it's a 160-game season! Players are going to slump, players are going to go on paternity leave, players are going to have botched epidurals ... better they get all the hiccoughs out of the way in August and September, as opposed to during the playoffs (which I predict will happen to the Dodgers).

Anyway, I am over the moon over this because of Anthony Rizzo. My favorite-most ballplayer would never be enjoying this post-season run if he hadn't been traded. This man needs another World Series ring. As the song says, "It's up to you, New York, New York!"

Sunday Stealing

TRAPPED IN A ROOM

1. If you were trapped in a room with the person who asked this for 24 hours, what would you do? The answer cannot be romantic or sexual. I'm assuming that the person who asked me this is our guest host, Ms. Kwiz. I would ask her about Maine and about books and about her love affair with road trips.

2. If you could learn any language instantly, what would it be? Spanish

3. If you could only read one book for the rest of your life, what would it be? Wow. I suppose The Bible, because I haven't ever sat down to read it and it's so many books within a book and (I don't mean this to sound this simplistic) it's always timely.

4. Favorite song lyric? This encapsulates the longest, most tumultuous relationship of my life: "So let me go, or make me want to stay."

5. Favorite album? The Beatles White Album

6. Which time of day would you say is best for you work-wise? Either mid-morning or late night

7. What do you think people assume about you from first glance? That I'm more conservative than I am.

8. Favorite city that you haven’t visited? London

9. If you received $10,000 but had to give it away, what would you do with it? Wouldn't this be the best problem to have? I have so many political organizations and charities I would love to share the money with and divvying it up would be fun.

10. What is one book you wish you could get all your friends to read?  The Princess Bride. If you've seen the movie, you only have part of the story. There's a poignant, wistful narration that is terrifically moving.

11. What is one movie you wish you could get all your friends to watch? It changes. Lately, I'd recommend Giant. It's a great love story and it also touches upon America's ongoing issues race, class, and gender. Plus, Elizabeth Taylor and Rock Hudson are so romantic and gorgeous they take your breath away. I could go on and on.

 
12. If you could create one thing, what would it be? A way to tell if the machines in the laundry room are in use. I hate going all the way down there (4 floors!) and finding there isn't a washer open.

13. If you could play any musical instrument, what would it be? Guitar.

14. What is your favorite item of clothing? I love my Gloria Vanderbilt Amanda jeans.

15. What is your favorite card/board game? Canasta.

 

Of birthdays and potatoes

I want to read it, too!

Today my nephew and I celebrated his 23rd birthday. TWENTY THREE! How can that be? I remember exactly what I was wearing the day I went to visit my newborn nephew at the hospital.

Anyway, I didn't know for a fact he'd be dressed in head-to-toe Cubbie blue (from his cap to his sandals) when I gave him his Cub-centric birthday present, but I suppose it was a good guess. Blood will tell, after all. 

We talked a lot of baseball: his new job as a part-time writer for a baseball website (!), the Cubs' prospects for next year, the Yankees run for a ring, and, of course, Joe Maddon. 

I also got him nailed down as my ride from the hospital on the off-chance I need surgery next month. It occurred to me that my nephew is the perfect choice. He will be working remotely, part-time, so he wouldn't be unduly inconvenienced. He has his own car. He is good with cats. He won't judge my lazy housekeeping. My asking him to do this seemed to make him feel adult.

He had pizza and french fries. I had a grilled chicken sandwich and french fries. Then this evening I had potato salad. Which leads me to ...

I have developed an outsized love of potatoes. Roasted, mashed, baked, french fried, tater tots or hashed brown. And the aforementioned potato salad. I think I could have potatoes for every meal. Happily.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: This Night Won't Last Forever (1979)

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

 

1) This song begins with, "Everybody likes a celebration." Do you have any birthdays or anniversaries coming up on your calendar? Today my nephew and I are celebrating his birthday. I got him former Cub manager Joe Maddon's autobiography. (It's been hard for me not to crack it open, since I want to read it, too!)

 

2) The lyrics tell us Michael Johnson is stuck at a party while his heart is breaking. He finds it awkward and painful to pretend there's nothing wrong. Are you adept at "putting a good face on it?" Or is it easy for others to tell how you're feeling? I have been playing hurt lately. I have (in the doctor's words) "a big honking kidney stone," which is painful. Plus, there's a shit ton of upheaval at work. But I'm working hard to put a good face on it. I'm not always successful -- pain can be hard to work through -- but I can appear very upbeat and chipper for a couple hours at a time. (Though this week I did suffer an epic fail in this regard. See post below.)

3) Michael feels like this is going to be a long night. Is there a part of your day when time tends to drag? Or when it flies? Sometimes the late afternoon drags. If I find myself awake after midnight, that can zoom by.

 

4) As bad as he feels right now, he's still hopeful about tomorrow. What are you looking forward to for Sunday? I should rest. I'm still not well.

 

5) When he was 13, Michael taught himself to play the guitar. He went on to take formal lessons and mastered classical guitar. What's something you would like learn more about/do better? Spanish. Learning another language would expand my world!

 

6) For a time he performed with a trio known as Denver, Boise & Johnson. The Denver was John. Do you have a favorite John Denver song? I don't really care for John Denver. I know, I know, he's much beloved. I'm sure it's me and not him. That said, I have good memories attached to hearing "Rocky Mountain High."

 

7) He retired to Minneapolis to be near his adult daughter. But he never stopped performing entirely. For years he delighted loyal local fans with with an annual holiday concert on December 26 at Orchestra Hall. Is there a performer you've seen in concert more than once? Sir Paul. Bruce. I've never seen them together. What a treat that would be!

8) In 1979, when this song was popular, the cable channel ESPN launched. What's the last sporting event that you watched? Baseball. As we approach the play-offs, baseball is everything to me! Here are the Yankees clinching their berth. That's my favorite, Anthony Rizzo, right in the middle. As much as I hate it that the Cubs traded him, I'm delighted for him. Had he stayed in Chicago, there would be no similar celebration for him. The Cubs won't be looking at the playoffs again for a long time.

 

There's also Albert Pujols and Aaron Judge and their big bats to watch. This is a very good time to enjoy America's pasttime.
 
9) Random question: Do you play Wordle? Every morning. If I get it right away, I feel brilliant. If I don't, well, it's humbling. I mean, I'm a writer, after all!

 

Well, that was a week!

Monday was a rough day. I was still exhausted from my day in the ER. But I couldn't just lie in bed because I had the handyman here all day working on my living room windows. He did a nice job, neat and efficient and he was out of here as fast as he could. I appreciated that.

I spent a lot of the day fielding calls from the hospital and making follow up appointments. I appreciate the quality of care I've received but I admit I'm overwhelmed by the next steps. Monday I shall bounce between my dentist's office and the hospital to consult with a urologist about my kidney stone. Then next Friday afternoon I follow up with my doctor to talk about my condition -- especially the MRI the hospital recommends to rule out abnormalities on my pancreas.

Tuesday I cried at work. I've been employed full time since I was 17 years old and I've never before cried in a professional situation.* Now that my career is coming to end, I dissolved. It was during a conference call, so at least I was weepy in the privacy of my own home, but my coworkers could hear it my voice.

My dream project -- the one I've been arguing to do for months -- has finally kicked off. Now, when I'm a lame duck. Now, when I don't time to do the quality of work I want to do. Now, when I'm fucking medicated! The client not only wants it done in a truncated time frame, they want it presented in a new template I've never used before. I cannot concentrate on both content and templating in this time frame, not when codeine complicates the equation. So I fell apart.

I am not proud of this.

Rita, our newest team member, dove right in. "I've got you, Girlie!" she kept saying. "You're fine. I've got you!" 

And she did. I did the writing, she did the formatting. And even though I won't be able to present it to the client myself, she promises, "I'll do you proud."

I'm so glad Rita gets me. I do still care. Because here's the thing: my client's corporate office is unhappy with the advertising agency I work for. My day-to-day clients have never had a single complaint about me. I know and understand their concerns and appreciate that they trust me to help solve them. 

I know, especially when you read things like the Trump complaint in NYC, it's easy to be jaded about corporate America. But my clients are honest and have integrity, and as long as they're paying me, I won't just "phone it in."

Will September 30 be my last day? I don't know. Our contract runs through November 30, but layoffs could happen with any pay period between now and then.

And I got answers! Originally I went to the ER with what my doctor suspected was diverticulitis. In addition to the crippling abdominal pain (which is the kidney stone), I have been battling gastrointestinal trouble. Months of it. No appetite. Constipation one day, diarrhea the next. After reviewing my test results, the hospital has diagnosed me with epiploic appendagitis. I'm learning what it means. Maybe someday I'll learn how to pronounce it!

Also, my gall bladder and pancreas look "unremarkable." This is a relief!

But there's still baseball. Anthony Rizzo (and the Yankees) have clinched a playoff berth and the Cubs have won 7 of their last 10. I feel sorry for people who don't love baseball. And cats. And books. Baseball, cats and books have gotten me through this so far.

And blog friends. Thank you for the kind messages. I have read them and I appreciate them enormously.

*I did once vomit from stress. That was in 1991 or 92. But that was in the privacy of the ladies' room and I'm not sure everyone knew about it. Ah, advertising! There are things I will not miss.

When will it reach critical mass?

It's so hard to listen to Trump supporters continue to wrap themselves in my Christian faith when they defend the man. He takes no responsibility for his actions -- whether it's the way he addressed the crowds on January 6 or the way he handled his finances in NYC and here in Chicago. He uses race to excuse himself (Letitia James is "racist" because she is prosecuting him). He doesn't care about how baseless rhetoric inflames and exacerbates.

What will it take before his followers see they have been bamboozled? When will he go away? When can I please stop seeing my faith used to excuse prejudice, selfishness, and grift?

Thursday Thirteen #276

 Thirteen tests often run at hospitals. I spent all day Sunday in the ER. As I was wheeled through the hospital en route to my CT scan, or as I lie on my bed watching my blood drawn, I got wondering about what goes on in hospitals. Here's a 2019 (pre-covid) snapshot. 

1. CBC (complete blood count)*
2. CT scan*
   
3. Basic metabolic panel
   
4. Glucose screen test for diabetes
5. Ultrasound
   
6. Urinalysis*
   
7. Chlamydia detection
8. MRI
   
9. TSH (thyroid)
   
10. Liver function
    
11. PTT (a test that measures how long it takes your blood to clot)
12. X-ray
    
13. Stool sample
    

*I had these, and the doctor was able to diagnose what he called "a honking kidney stone."

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