My heart is broken

Anthony Rizzo has not hit a home run since May. No homers in June. No homers in the first two weeks of July.

Yankee fans are starting to turn on him. I suppose this is to be expected -- Yankee fans booed Aaron Judge at home during the playoffs last year -- but it's still anathema to me. As a Cub fan, I've never booed one of my own in my life. There are players I haven't like (Carlos Zambrano springs to mind) but I sat on my hands. I never booed. 

Do these boo birds think he wants to strike out? Do they think his lack of production reflects lack of effort? Do they think booing helps anything?

Fortunately the Yankees don't play at home until Friday. Maybe by the end of the week, Rizz' bat will awaken and he will silent the naysayers.

Time for Joy 2023

Every year I take the August Happiness Challenge. Here's a brief explanation of the Challenge: "Each day in August you are to post about something that makes *you* happy. Pretty simple. And, it doesn't even have to be every day if you don't want it to be. It's a great way to remind ourselves that there are positive things going on in our lives, our communities, and the world."

You're invited to join me. Visit me with a link to your daily August happy, and I'll come read it. I've found that experiencing other peoples' everyday pleasures is a great mood lifter.

It helps if your August Happiness Challenge posts are marked with an icon. Just something that means "happy" to you. Here's a pair of my past happys.

THE HAPPY BEGINS AUGUST 1!

New and improved

The annual library book sale was early this year, in July instead of August. This is just one of many changes since covid caused everyone to re-evaluate everything.

It's now smaller, but more lucrative. For decades, the sale was done a certain way. Books were collected for nearly two full months and then the high school cafeteria was transformed into a book store. The result was a massive number of books and long lines of book lovers, waiting to get in. That Friday night was an event. 

But there was a considerable cost attached to that. The high school demanded payment for the space, and it was expensive. Not unreasonable -- we live in a time when students are the target of mass shooters -- so there were security guards all day and into the evening, first when the books were donated and sorted, then when the sale tables were set up, and finally for the sale.

Also, with all those donations, a heartbreaking number of books were destroyed. Even though Sunday was free to schools, hospitals, daycare and senior centers, as well as us volunteers. The book sale committee wasn't aware of any organization who would take the leftovers at no cost, and with what was being paid for high school security, they didn't want to cut further into profits.

Covid gave the committee an opportunity to look at the sale with fresh eyes. Instead of using the high school, it was decided to hold the sale in the library's conference rooms. (A room for children's books, another for cookbooks, etc.) This saves the cost of the high school security guards and -- I love this! -- it gets people into the library. Let them see everything this community jewel has to offer.

Donations were limited to four weeks. There simply isn't room at the library to collect and then display a high school cafeteria's worth of books. Instead of destroying the books left over, Better World Books agreed to come and pick them up, if we packed them into the cartons we provided. (The first day I volunteered I literally spent hours making Better World Books boxes.) Thank you, Better World Books!

I spoke briefly to the new Vice President of the library's "friends" and she told me this new way of doing thing has made more money for the library than ever!

This year, on volunteer free day, I only got one book for myself. A William Goldman book from the 1980s I somehow missed called Heat. I still love books and have two going at any time, but I'm borrowing more from the library than buying. My home is just over stuffed!

I did leave with free books for my aunt (she loves Michael Connelly), a paperback of Key West short stories for my friend Patrick, a study of Bruce Springsteen for Mindy, and some DVDs for my oldest friend. Now all I have to do is pack them up and ship 'em off.

One thing hasn't changed: Every year there's a book donated in bigger numbers than any other. A book many of my neighbors bought and then decided not to keep. I suspect it's a tome chosen by local book clubs.

This year, the winner of this dubious honor has been here before. My Life by Bill Clinton is back at #1, first time since 2009.

2022, 2019, 2018 and 2017: The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

2016: The Help

2015: The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest

2014: The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

2013: The DaVinci Code

2012: Sixkill (a Spenser Mystery)

2011: The Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood

2010: Scarlett, the Sequel to Margaret Mitchell’s Gone with the Wind

2009: My Life by Bill Clinton

2008: The DaVinci Code

2007: The Nanny Diaries

2006: The Corrections

Sunday Stealing

SUNDAY STEALING

1. What are the 3 most important things everyone should know about you? I love (in alphabetical order): baseball, The Beatles, and cats.

2. What is the strangest thing you believed as a child? That I was adopted. My older sister and I are 16 months apart. She had an elaborate baby book, I had none. My mother explained this first by telling me mine was lost when we moved, then (this is the truth) she didn't have time to maintain one for me because caring for two babies concurrently was hard for her. I accepted neither answer. Obviously there were no baby photos of me because my parents hadn't adopted me yet. Fortunately, my favorite uncle was just 16 when my mom asked him to be my godfather and coincidentally he had just gotten his first camera. He was so into both me and it that he was able to show me ample photographic evidence I'd been in the family all along.

3. Thinking of school classes, which were your favorite and least favorite? English was my favorite, and I hated math. This is because I was good at English and I sucked at math.

4. What is your favorite fast food? Soft tacos from Taco Bell. (The only Mexican food my finicky gut can tolerate.)

5. What song comes closest to how you feel about your life right now? "Beautiful Boy," when John sings "Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans."

6. Have you ever taken martial arts classes? Nope

7. Does your life tend to get better or worse or does it just stay the same? Yes! In some ways it's better, in some ways it's worse, and in some ways I'm consistent.

8.What arts and crafts have you tried and decided you were bad at? All of them. I don't understand how I can have such pretty handwriting and yet be so terrible at drawing, painting, stitching, etc. I mean, don't they all require manual dexterity?

9. What is the truest thing that you know? God loves me.

10. Are you more of a giver or a taker? I think it evens out. As the Lads sang, "And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make."

11. Do you make your decisions with an open heart/mind? I like to think so.

12. What is the most physically painful thing that has ever happened to you? Last September I endured four consecutive nights terrible, rolling pains across my gut. I had to pace, soak in the tub and take painkillers just to get through the night. Then in the morning (poof!) I was fine. On Friday I went to my doctor. She could find nothing "imminent" wrong with me, suspected diverticulitis or IBD, and scheduled tests for a few days hence. That night it was so bad I called her around midnight and she told me not to wait, to go to the ER. After 8 hours of tests and bag after bag of fluids, I was told I had a massive kidney stone. Or, to quote the attending physician, "a big honking kidney stone." He was impressed, telling me it was the size and shape of "one of those little houses in Monopoly." Imagine how much a hotel would hurt!

Self portrait

13. What is the most emotionally painful thing that has ever happened to you? I know this will sound strange, but the Trump Town Hall on CNN last May was very, very painful for me. Hearing the audience laugh along with him and cheer him when he made fun of E. Jean Carroll was terribly disturbing. I was molested by a relative in 1974 and date raped in 1987. I didn't report either incident at the time because I was frightened, humiliated and sure I wouldn't be believed. Hearing that laughter, listening to those cheers, brought it all back and reinforced what the much younger Gal believed. The most awful moments in my life would be disbelieved or mocked. And yes, Hillary Clinton was right, a sizable percentage of my countrymen (and women) are deplorable. This makes my heart ache. 

14. What is your favorite line from a movie? It's from a song from a movie. It's kind of like sorbet for my soul after answering #13. "Because there you are standing there loving me, whether or not you should. So somewhere in my youth or childhood, I must have done something good."

The Sound of Music, of course. Sigh.

15. Can you eat with chopsticks? Nope

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Touch Me in the Morning (1973)

Unfamiliar with this week's song? Hear it here.

1) In this song, Diana Ross sings that nothing good lasts forever. Do you agree? I believe that none of us stays the same, so maybe it's true. Back in 2017, my movie group watched Apartment for Peggy, a 1948 movie about newlyweds who take a room in the home of a retired college professor. The unconventional multi-generational household enhances the lives of everyone involved. Anyway, six years ago, I related to Peggy. I wondered what it would be like to set up housekeeping in someone else's home. In 2023, now a retiree myself, I felt a great kinship to the professor. Certainly the movie hasn't changed, so I must have.

But then again, some things truly are a joy forever: the crack of a baseball bat, time alone with a good book, a cat's purr, Paul McCartney's voice ... So I guess my answer is a solid, "I don't know."

2) She sings about a happy past with her lover, and the strength she'll need to face tomorrow alone. Do you find yourself more often remembering the past or anticipating the future? I spend way too much time doing both. I'm trying to stay more in the moment. As former Cub manager Joe Maddon used to advise my guys,* "Take care of the minutes and the hours will take care of themselves."

3) In the 1970s, Diana Ross had young daughters. To spend maximum time with her girls, she would sleep all day when they were in school. That way she could have dinner with them, bathe them and put them to bed before going to the studio and recording all night. Have you ever worked the night shift? Nope

4) Diana has five children altogether. There's a 16-year age difference between her oldest daughter, Rhonda, and her youngest son, Evan. Studies have shown that when there's a big gap between siblings, parents consider the older kids "built-in babysitters." In your family, were the older kids ever in charge of the younger ones? Yes. Sometimes I felt stuck with my kid sister. Sometimes I enjoyed her. But I spent a shit-ton of time caring for her. We're 8 years apart.

5) She says her favorite sweet treat is Famous Amos Chocolate Chip Cookies. Do you have a favorite cookie?

I'm a simple gal with simple tastes

 
6) Around the time she recorded this song, Diana Ross considered making a movie called The Bodyguard. She was to play a singer who received death threats, and Steve McQueen would portray the man hired to protect her. Scheduling conflicts prevented the movie from being made. It wasn't filmed until 1992, and then with different stars. Without looking it up, can you name stars of The Bodyguard? 

I didn't have to look it up; this movie was insanely popular in 92

7) In 1973, when this song was #1, Norman Mailer was atop the best-seller list with his controversial biography of Marilyn Monroe. Do you often read biographies and memoirs? Yes. I'm currently reading one about Aristotle Onassis and it's fascinating. He had a truly abysmal childhood, witnessing atrocities when the Turkish military took over his hometown of Smyrna. His family lost everything, his grandmother was murdered in the street, his uncle hanged and his father imprisoned. I think this totally messed him up and left him a few quarts low of empathy. (I had no idea. I just always thought of him as Jackie's second husband.)

8) Also in 1973, another Motown singer, Stevie Wonder, was injured in an automobile crash and still has a scar on his nose to show for it. Have you ever been in a car accident? Nothing more serious than a fender bender. (Knock wood.)

9) Random Question: What's the last thing you borrowed or lent? I borrowed the Onassis book from the library.

 

 

*Joe attributes it to Lord Chesterfield. 

My small heart just grew three sizes

My favorite most ball player, Anthony Rizzo, raised $1 million last weekend with his Swing for the Fences auction. The money will go to help families battling pediatric cancer.* The Anthony Rizzo Family Foundation provides grants to help parents pay for meals and parking at the hospitals while their child is in treatment, rent or mortgage so they don't have to worry about the roof over their heads as they fight cancer, and daycare for any siblings so parents can accompany the patient to chemo treatments. Over the years he's provided therapy dogs to Joe DiMaggio Children Hospital in Hollywood, Florida, taken patients from the Children's Hospital at Montefiore in New York shopping at the flagship FAO Schwartz store and built the family waiting area at Chicago's Lurie Children's Hospital. All year around he sends personal letters to young patients, encouraging them to "dream big."

This week he was asked who he'd put on his baseball Mount Rushmore.

Right there with Babe Ruth, his Yankee teammate Aaron Judge and his boyhood idol Ken Griffey Jr. was Ernie Banks. Mr. Cub. The first baseman I grew up watching. The man who christened the ballpark at Clark and Addison "The Friendly Confines." 

My favorite Cub named The Greatest Cub. A part of his heart is still in Chicago.

Could I love Anthony Rizzo more? No.

God, I love baseball!

*This is not a charity that focuses on research or treatment. If that's where your heart leads you, check out St. Jude's. 

It's a brand new day, and I still hate her

My darling friend Henry has always believed that if he loves you and he loves me, you and I will love each other. A lovely notion, but not practical. Over the 30 years of our friendship, I can think of at least three dear friends of his that I've been thrown together with and had to pretend to adore because if I didn't, he'd be hurt or disillusioned. But to be honest, I couldn't stand them. (And that doesn't include his husband Reg, who pisses me off more with each passing day.)

One of these friends of a friend is Kate. She was an associate creative director Henry worked with briefly before he met me. She and her girlfriend palled around with Henry and Reg and, being Henry, he was sure she and I would also get on like a house afire. I pretended to, but I always found her competitive and pretentious. You see, as advertisers, we were creative but we didn't produce art. We sold people shit they didn't need. I'm not embarrassed about my career and I'm proud of much I accomplished. Advertising is important to marketing and commerce. But I ain't F. Scott Fitzgerald and Kate isn't Hemingway, no matter how high-flown her rhetoric.

I'm the only one in our merry band who is still in Chicago. Henry and Reg moved to Key West about 25 years ago. Kate broke up with her lover and started anew in Washington DC. She married a similarly successful woman and they built themselves a fine life. A country cabin in Virginia for long weekends in summer and winter getaways to Italy, Spain and, just last year, Cuba. 

I admit it: I resent the living shit out of Kate. For though, since Henry's accident, she has given considerable lip service to loving Henry and Reg, she is not there for them in any meaningful way. She ♥'s Reg's Facebook posts about how hard their lives have been, but that's the extent of her involvement. Oh yes! To be fair, she did pay their mortgage one month back in 2018, while Henry was still in the hospital. That was generous and most appreciated. But her checkbook has not opened again.

Yet every three months or so, she reaches out to me. Always after she's checked in with them. An hour on the phone, once a season. That's her involvement. Which would be fine, if she didn't feel the need to instruct me about them. How hard Reg has tried (we can debate this), or difficult Henry is (you think I don't know that?). It occurs to me that she spends as much time recounting her calls to me as she does talking to them. I don't know why she bothers, except to share her superior understanding of the situation to me. Why do I bother? Because she always says she has something important to share with me. She never does.

I have suggested all the ways she could help them. Maybe instead of driving to Fredericksburg, they could fly down to Key West for the weekend to spend some time with Henry and give Reg the break from caregiving she insists he needs. Oh, she can't. Busy, busy, busy. What about in the winter, when it's too cold enjoy the cabin? Why not go down then? Oh, she can't. Busy, busy, busy. It really burned my ass that they flew OVER Key West to vacation in Cuba! It didn't occur to her to add a few days to her trip to spend some time with these "dear friends" that she claims to care so much about? Come to think of it, in the 25 years Henry and Reg have lived in Key West, she's visited once. ONCE! And that was before Henry's accident.

She reached out to me Wednesday afternoon. To tell me all about Henry and Reg. Am I aware that Reg is drinking too much? Yes. Duh. Do I realize that Henry has not been receiving the cognitive and occupational therapy that was recommended years ago? Yes. Duh. Does it bother me that Reg sold the house without lining up anywhere for them to live? Yes. Duh. Do I know how "insane" Henry has become? No. NO. 

All this hand wringing about how hard this has been for Reg, who has a functioning brain and is the responsible spouse, and no compassion for how confusing and terrifying life can be for Henry! He doesn't understand why he has to leave Key West. It upsets him to see his belongings thrown in a dumpster or sold. He is scared that Reg is just doing all this to be rid of him. "Insane," Kate? No! Henry is vulnerable and suffering from dementia and the untreated after effects of a bike accident and a TBI.

I disagreed with her assessment of Henry as "insane." She agreed "impaired" might be a better word. Ya think? I told her about how dear he can still be, about how during our call last week, frightened and agitated as he was, he was concerned about my unending dental work. Kate dismissively deemed that "typical gay guy and straight girlfriend." What a bitch! I responded that as Henry fades away, that thoughtfulness is a cherished memory.

I woke up this morning still mad. But then I thought it through. The upside to dementia -- how's that for a phrase? -- is that Henry no longer understands or cares that I don't like Kate. Now that the end of Henry's journey is near, I don't have to be concerned about missing anything important by avoiding her. Therefore I'm not dealing with her anymore. 

There's something liberating about that.

Photo by engin akyurt on Unsplash

Thursday Thirteen #317

Thirteen Amazon top sellers. I feel I'm always waiting for a package from Amazon. So are millions of other Americans. Here's what we're buying, as indicated by the best-seller* in major categories.

I did this last year, if you're interested in comparing/contrasting.

1.  Beauty and Personal Care: Schick Hydro Silk Touch-Up Dermaplaning Tool. This is a skinny little razor for shaping eyebrows and removing peachfuzz. 3 for $5.94, which seems like a very good price.

2. Shoes. "Wendy" lace-up loafers by Hey Dude. These would be cute with jeans and a black or gray top. If I was still working, I might buy them and leave them under my desk. But I'm not still working, so I'm moving right along.

3. Women's Clothing. Werena shaping boyshorts with tummy control. These are highly-rated and very popular, but I've worn similar and frankly, they make going to the bathroom a little harder.

4. Men's Clothing. Under Armour Tech 2.0 white t-shirt. All I know about Under Armour is that my favorite-most ball player, Anthony Rizzo, endorses them. Therefore they must be good.

5. Household Cleaning. Clorox Disinfecting Wipes. I like a good wipe. I have these in my kitchen and near the cats' litter boxes (but I didn't order through Amazon). PS These were #1 last time, too!

6. Home and Kitchen. HiWare 48-piece Silverware Set. This is service for eight and, as of this writing, 21% off. It looks like a great deal if I needed new everyday flatware, but I don't, so I'm moving right along.

7. Appliances. Magic Bullet Blender. Now why is this in "appliances" and not "home and kitchen?" Amazon's classifications and algorithms are beyond me.

8. Laptops. Apple 2020 MacBook Air, 13" screen. Hey! This looks exactly like mine. And the price is very good. 

9. Office Supplies. BIC X-tra Smooth Mechanical Pencils. I prefer a freshly sharpened #2 myself, but for those who like mechanical pencils, Amazon sells them in packs of 40.

10. Cell Phones. Apple iPhone 11. This one is refurbished and sells for $304. I wonder how many they have in stock.

11. Television. Vizio 4o" Smart TV. 40" seems too big for my living room, and my current TV is fine, so I'm moving on.

12. Video Games. John Wick: Chapter 4. Is this a video game or the movie or both? If only I cared.

13. Pet Supplies. Earth Rated Dog Poop Bags. This was #1 last year, too. Dog owners are a loyal breed.

 

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

*List is updated hourly.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

 

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

PS I can no longer participate in WWW.WEDNESDAY via that link because her blog won't accept Blogger comments. I mention this only to save you the frustration I experienced trying to link up.

1. What are you currently reading? Onassis: An Extravagant Life by Frank Brady. It occurs to me that Ari Onassis had turned up as a co-star in many, many of the biographies I've read. Jackie's second husband, business partner to Prince Rainier of Monaco, party pal to Liz and Dick and frequent host to Winston Churchill in Churchill's later years. So everything I know about him tangential. Until now.

 

I'm not that far into yet, but already I'm impressed with both the story and the storytelling. Aristo (as his family called him) is getting ready for college and can speak four languages (Greek, Turkish, Spanish and English). He's such a good student that at 16 he's considered for admission to Oxford. Though only 5'5, he's a lion with the ladies. Then the Great Fire of Smyrna hit. The Turkish military took over the Onassis hometown of Smyrna (now Izmir) and intentionally burned it to the ground, killing up to 125,000 Greeks and Armenians. Soldiers raped countless women. The Onassis family lost everything, and this teenage boy witnessed it all. My heart goes out to him. I always knew Onassis was considered a self-made man, but I had no idea the tragedy he endured when his family's upper-middle-class lifestyle was destroyed.

2. What did you recently finish reading? Such Good Friends by Stephen Greco. This is a fictionalized account of the real-life friendship between Lee Radziwill and Truman Capote. It's seen through the eyes of Marlene, Lee's live-in housekeeper. Slowly over time, Marlene becomes a friend to Truman, who encouraged her as a writer.

This novel concentrates on 1961 to 1984, so Marlene there when Lee was at the epicenter of society. She was Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis' sister, and the glare of Jackie's celebrity lit Lee up, too. During those years, Truman was one of America's premier writers. Together Lee and Truman partied with the Duke and Duchess of Windsor, Nureyev, Mick and Bianca, and Warhol. Marlene, a girl from the wrong side of the tracks with a mysterious past, saw it all and took notes.

 

While I didn't NOT enjoy it while I was reading it, Such Good Friends does not bear up under scrutiny:

•  It's a historic novel, so I shouldn't be too bothered by inaccuracies. But this one really bothered me: BOTH Lee and Truman were alcoholics, BOTH Lee and Truman sought treatment. Truman's dependency is depicted in detail and Lee's is glossed over. 

•  Lee had two children, Tony and Tina, whom our narrator had to watch grow up. I mean, Marlene lived with the Radziwills in that Manhattan apartment for more than 20 years! Yet the kids are scarcely mentioned. Wallpaper patterns and couture are described ad nauseum, but Lee's relationship to her children is non-existent. It left me feeling that both Lee and Marlene had to be very shallow women.

 

I don't regret reading this book, but I don't recommend it to anyone, either. Life's too short.

3. What will read next? I don't know.

  

A mixed bag

So many feelings on Monday! My friendships made me happy and sad. I guess that's just the stuff of life, right?

First I got a text and an email from John, thanking me for celebrating his birthday with him. Under normal circumstances, this wouldn't be that big a deal. After all, we've been doing birthdays together since the 1980s. Plus this year was especially low key. All we did have drinks at his favorite bar. The Cubs were playing the Yankees and I really wanted to see the game and John wanted to show me off to his tavern buddies. (He feels my knowledge of baseball is unexpected and impressive.) While the birthday gifts were carefully chosen -- a pin from the TCM Film Festival, a magnet from my trip to Springfield last year, and a bawdy mug and equally NSFW bar napkins from Tampa -- they were certainly not expensive.

But he and I have been somehow "off" all summer. He's been grumpy and finds me especially annoying at times. It's bothered me and, I sense, he felt the same way because he seemed so happy that we're happy together again. We've been friends for 40+ years, and it's such a comfort to know we're still us.

But then I stumbled upon a quote from Jose Marti, and my heart broke. I only know Jose Marti because of my dear friend Henry. We saw his statue in Key West's Bayview Park one day and Henry told me Marti was a Cuban poet, revolutionary and hero during the Ten Years War.

Henry was so well educated and so intrigued by Key West's rich and colorful past. But now he has the mind of a child -- the cumulative effects of alcohol, traumatic brain injury and dementia -- and he and his husband, Reg, are leaving Key West forever this week because if they didn't sell the house, they would lose it to the bank. I fear that Henry will fade further into his own world when the ballasts of his life in Key West -- his friends, his church, the familiar surroundings -- are gone. 

I try not to be angry, but it's a losing fight. I miss Henry so much, and I can't shake the suspicion that if Reg had not been so fucking stubborn and gotten real help for Henry earlier, we wouldn't be here now.

But that doesn't really matter, does it? We are where we are and it is what it is. Henry is receding from me and at an alarming pace. I must accept it.

As light as being good with John feels, that's how dark that Marti passage made me feel.

Little things that mean a lot

 "You're cool. You're a nice lady." So said the homeless man who chatted me up this morning while I was on my way to yoga class.

I'm always in a hurry and kind of embarrassed when I go to yoga because I'm wearing yoga pants and a Bruce Springsteen t-shirt. And carrying a mat. I think I look quite silly, but it's only around the corner and I remind myself I'm not a Kardashian and there are no paparazzi waiting to splash my déclassé attire across the internet.

As I'm headed toward the streetlight at the corner, I hear a voice behind me say, "Hi." I'm in front of the bank and look into the reflection in the windows to see a young man I don't recognize. It was a fleeting glance, and I assumed he was talking on his phone through headphones.

"I said, 'hi,'" he repeated. I turned and took a closer look. It was the young man who usually sits in front of the bookstore. I think that's probably where he was headed to begin his day of panhandling. 

"Oh, hi," I said. "I'm sorry. I thought you were on your phone."

Stuck beside me at the red light, he said, "You're the one who gives me the bag with the food and the money." It's true. Every time I see him I give him a blessing bag with a $1 bill, a breakfast bar, a packet of tissues, cough drops or hard candy, and a chapstick. Since I shop at Dollar Tree, the baggie probably costs me $2.

"That's me," I said. "But I don't have anything with me now. Just my keys and my yoga mat."

"I know. I just wanted to say 'hi.' You're cool. You're a nice a lady."

I was both pleased and embarrassed. "Well," I said, "I'm happy to help because we're all in this life together, right?"

"Not everybody thinks like that. Wish they did, but they don't." 

I didn't know what to say to him and was grateful the light changed. I crossed and he turned left. "Take care," I said over my shoulder.

During a quiet moment in yoga class I smiled to myself. It feels very good to know my little efforts made another person feel good. "You're cool. You're a nice a lady." felt like great praise.

 

Sunday Stealing

Stolen from SwapBot

1. Do you trust people at restaurants who handle your food that they aren't doing anything gross to it while you can't see them? Yes. I worry about many things, but this is not among them.

2. How do you wear your hair each day? Parted on the left and blown dry.

3. Have you ever worn:

A gas mask? No

A blindfold? Yes

4. Would you be willing to go hang gliding? I'd need to know more details before I answer this.

5. What is the difference between a man's button down shirt and a woman's button down shirt? It's been my experience that women's shirts have narrower sleeves  and the buttons are on the left.

6. Have you ever taken a lock of someone else's hair? Nope

7. Have you ever given anyone a lock of your hair? Nope

8. If you had a locket what would you put inside? When I was a little girl, I had a cheap gold locket with a teeny-tiny picture of Paul McCartney inside. I'd cut it from a magazine.

9. Have you ever written something on a bathroom wall? Yes. I was very drunk and waiting for my train home after a group of us went to the movies. It occurred to me that I was in love with one of my coworkers and I was so astonished by this revelation that I wrote it on the wall of that ladies restroom at the train station. No, I am not proud of this. BTW, he and I are still in touch. Today he's the father of four and a new grandfather.

10. When was the last time you fell down in public? It was the winter of 2019. I slipped and fell near the Picasso in Daley Plaza. I was hurrying back to the office and the street was very snowy. I don't slip on the snow and ice anymore since chiropractors have my back issues straightened out. (Pun intended.)

11. Are you more aggressive or mellow? Since retirement I find myself far more mellow.

12. What have you done with your self to keep your life worth living? I try to give back. Every day I ask myself if I've done something kind, generous or useful to please God. Sometimes it's big, sometimes very small. But every day I try to do something good.

13. What is the most incredible thing you can do? See #12.

14. Do you bury your pets, flush them, or throw them away? These are my options? Really? I say "none." My pets have been humanely euthanized by veterinarians who have very kindly given me their paw prints as keepsakes before they were cremated. (That was thoroughly depressing.)

15. What's your favorite thing that is yellow? I don't have a lot of yellow. The only thing that comes to mind is the potholder in my kitchen. It's bright yellow flowers on a deep green background.

16. Do you have any tattoos or piercings? One piercing in each year. No tattoos. Dull, right? 

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Mercy (2013)
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.
 
1) In this song, Shawn Mendes pleads with the girl he loves to be careful with his heart. Clearly he feels she's more important to him than he is to her. Do you believe that, in every relationship, someone always loves more? Yes. And I mean that about every relationship, not just romance.

2) He says that he'd willingly drive through the night just to be near her. Do you enjoy your time behind the wheel? Or do you consider driving necessary but not necessarily pleasurable? I don't drive.
 
3) He acknowledges that she has good intentions, but she hurt him anyway. Can you think of a time when you unintentionally hurt someone's feelings? Yes. I was sorry. I think I'll just leave it at that.
 
4) Shawn Mendes was a serious skateboarder during his high school years. Crazy Sam admits she's never even been on a skateboard. How about you? Are you more like Shawn or Sam, or are you somewhere in between? I have never been on a skateboard, nor do I ever expect to be on one any time in the future. But I'm happy about this question because it gives me the opportunity to share this photo. Here's 60-year-old Katharine Hepburn, learning to skateboard between scenes on Guess Who's Coming to Dinner.

 

Wasn't she fabulous?

5) While in his teens, he taught himself to play guitar while watching YouTube videos. Do you spend a lot of time on YouTube? If yes, what type of videos do you watch most often? I watch videos that relate to something else I've just watched or read. For example, after finishing Season 5 of The Crown, I rewatched (the real) Princess Diana interviewed by (the real) Martin Bashir.

Real vs. reel

 

6) When he's traveling or busy working, Shawn eats cold cereal for every meal -- breakfast, lunch and dinner. He says it's fast, tasty, and better than the fast food he'd grab otherwise. Will you be getting any meals "to go" this weekend? Kinda sorta. I picked up pizza on Friday afternoon and shall enjoy the leftovers Saturday.
 
7) In 2016, the year this song was popular, Game of Thrones was TV's hottest show. Were you a fan? Nope. I'm sure it was well made and entertaining but I just don't like sci-fi/fantasy.
 
8) Also in 2016, a German shorthaired pointer won Best in Show at the Westminster Dog Show. Tell us about a dog who holds a special place in your heart. Sheba was a collie mix who lived at the resort my family stayed at every year. She was -- unwisely, I felt -- allowed to wander free around the grounds. Sheba was as fond of me as I was of her, and so I kept her with me for the entire time we were there. At least I was sure she was safe when I was there. She'd sit by my towel on the beach, listen to Cub games with me on the porch of our cabin, sleep on my bed. Except for that last one, my mother was very understanding and indulgent. I really hated those vacations except for Sheba. I loved the fwap, fwap, fwap of her tail on the floor whenever I said her name. She belonged to Eddie, the chief cook at the resort, and when Sheba died he was kind enough to reach out to my family to let me know. He didn't want me arriving in July, running around calling her name, and no Sheba.

9) Random question: What's the subject line of the top email in your spam folder? "Accept your invitation to the 60601 Library Board." I don't live in zip code 60601. It was a misguided attempt at separating me from my money.