Oh, who knew his touch would be so knowing, his skin so cool and his lips so sweet? This was better than Disneyland! She couldn’t wait to see what other thrills awaited her.
These are the thoughts and observations of me — a woman of a certain age. (Oh, my, God, I'm 65!) I'm single. I'm successful enough (independent, self supporting). I live just outside Chicago, the best city in the world. I'm an aunt and a friend. I feel that voices like mine are rather underrepresented online or in print. So here I am. If my musings resonate with you, please visit my blog again sometime.
Friday, March 09, 2012
Trifecta
The weekend's challenge: This weekend's challenge is to give us a story or snippet of a story which includes, in exactly 33 words, a justified exclamation point.
Oh, who knew his touch would be so knowing, his skin so cool and his lips so sweet? This was better than Disneyland! She couldn’t wait to see what other thrills awaited her.
Oh, who knew his touch would be so knowing, his skin so cool and his lips so sweet? This was better than Disneyland! She couldn’t wait to see what other thrills awaited her.
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Hey, Gal,
ReplyDeleteIf that doesn't justify an ex-cla-MATION point, I don't know what does. First time seeing your work, through Trifecta. Great. !!!!!
Amy Barlow Liberatore, and here is mine:
http://sharplittlepencil.com/2012/03/09/prove-it-trifecta-and-rush/
As the merry goes round and round.
ReplyDeleteHa ha love it! :) x
ReplyDeleteOh, Gal, this is fantastic!!!
ReplyDeleteIntriguing. A good use of an exclamation in this one.
ReplyDeletea makeout session better than Disneyland deserves some exclamation :)
ReplyDeleteFantastic!
ReplyDeleteYes, you clearly need the exclamation point in this one. Could you imagine if it just read
ReplyDelete"This was better than Disneyland." That wouldn't even make sense here. Definitely justifiable punctuation.
Although you are one my preferred authors in this writing group, I fail to see the absolute requirement for your exclamation point. Perhaps it's my lacking because I deem it only necessary when the speech is an expletive. In the phrase "This was just like Disneyland", the emotion is enthusiasm and not an expletive. It's me - I know - I'm just a translator, and not an author. And I admit I like the idea of helping one's self to an exclamation point to convey enthusiasm.
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ReplyDeleteWeissdorn -- I'm glad I'm one of your favorites. I appreciate that vote of confidence! But I also kinda feel sorry for you if you limit yourself and your self expression to adding emphasis on the expletive -- which the dictionary tells us is an oath or a curse. You are then, by definition, depriving yourself and your readers of a lot of JOY!! (Double exclamation)
ReplyDeleteBetter than Disneyland? Is it possible? Loved this response. We're glad that you've joined us at Trifecta and hope to see more of you over the coming challenges.
ReplyDeleteOoh, sexy! I like this, very well done, Gal!
ReplyDeleteVery nice. I love seeing all the different approaches to this prompt.
ReplyDeleteSultry. Much better than mouse house, I should think.
ReplyDelete