Saturday, December 01, 2012
Holidailies -- Day 1
The biggest reason for this is my mom's passing. She died on September 13 of this year, and she was the hub of our family at the holidays.
And that means our family traditions are evolving. I realized over Thanksgiving that while our family traditions were familiar, they weren't necessarily happy. As my mom's life drew to a close, I made a conscious effort to "keep a lid on things," to get along because I wanted our time together -- hers and mine -- to be as peaceful and pleasant for her as possible. I kept thinking of the lyrics to a Beatle song, "Two of Us": You and I have memories longer than the road that stretches on ahead.
Spending Thanksgiving in a restaurant, all dressed up like a big girl, surrounded by dear old friends felt more comfortable than many of the tense, awkward holiday meals I've had in the recent past with siblings.
So I'm making my way through this first, pivotal holiday season without my mother the best way I know how -- with my words. Over the next month I expect to miss her a great deal, but I also hope to discover a lot of joy, too.