Saturday 9

Saturday 9: The Love Boat (1977)
 
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

1) The Love Boat ran from 1977 to 1987. It was in the Top 10 for seven of those 10 seasons. Are you familiar with the show? Were you a fan? No. The only time I ever remember watching it was whenever I stayed with my Cousin Rose for a weekend in Michigan. We'd drive to her parent's home for dinner on Saturday night. They were my great aunt/uncle, very set in their ways, and it felt more like a formal audience than a visit. After dessert, we would dependably move to the living room, where they had their after-dinner coffee and we all watched The Love Boat. They were so happy when they saw the week's stars. "Oh! Charo! She's so cute!" After The Love Boat, Rosie and I would go back to her house and resume our visit.

2) Every week, viewers followed The Pacific Princess as she set sail to a glamorous destination. Have you ever taken a cruise? If so, where did you go?  I've never been on a cruise. I used to consider the TCM Classic Cruise because classic film fans tell me that -- while upfront it's a lot of money -- it ends up being a little cheaper than the TCM Film Festival because of all that's included (especially meals). Maybe next year.
 

3) Gavin MacLeod played Captain Steubing. Born Allan See, he came up with the stage name by combining the first name of a fictional character he admired, and the last name of a teacher who influenced him. Using his formula, give yourself a stage name. For example, Sam would be Hermione Hart (Hermione from Harry Potter; Hart for her Kindergarten teacher). Call me Mary Dombrowski: Mary for Mary Poppins and Dombrowski for my high school American history teacher.


4) After the series ended, Fred Grandy (aka "Gopher") went on to become a Congressman from Iowa and then CEO of Goodwill Industries. If you had a bag of gently-used items to donate, where would you take them? Goodwill.
 
5) Ted Lange is best known for his role as the ship's bartender, Isaac. But he began his career performing the classics, and appeared at Colorado Shakespearean Festival and London's Royal Academy of Dramatic Art. Let's class up this joint. Give us a little Shakespeare.  "Leave her to heaven and to those thorns in her bosom that lodge to prick and sting her." Hamlet.


6) Bernie Kopell played the ship's doctor, Adam Bricker. Kopell first appeared on TV in 1961 and was a regular on Get Smart and That Girl, and he's still acting today. But Love Boat was, by far, his favorite role. Working on the show was "absolute heaven" because he was paid to travel the world and meet his acting idols, like Oscar winners Greer Garson, Joan Fontaine and Eva Marie Saint, who appeared on the show. When you think of the best job you have ever had, what made it so good: the pay, the location, the people you met, or the work itself? In the late 1990s, I had almost all of it: Good pay, nice office, and a spectacular boss. He was honest and I was proud to work for him. He founded a powerful advertising agency and last year he died a wealthy man, but all that success came to him because he lived the Golden Rule.

7) Lauren Tewes played Cruise Director Julie McCoy. Today she lives in Seattle, appearing in local theater and -- between acting assignments -- working as a chef for a catering service. Have you hosted dinner for more than 8 people? If yes, do you remember what you served? Pizza and salad, delivered from around the corner.

8) For the first nine seasons, the theme was sung by Jack Jones. The Grammy-winning

singer says one of his career highlights playing Sky Masterson onstage in Guys and Dolls. In his late 50s at the time, had had to go outside his comfort zone, dancing and acting as well as singing before a live audience. Tell us about something new you tried recently. Well, it didn't take me out of my comfort zone, exactly, but since the pandemic I've discovered borrowing electronic media from the public library. Libby and me, we're pals now.

9) Random question  -- Which would you rather receive as a gift: one $500 wristwatch, or five $100 wristwatches? My preference would be ten $50 watches. Before the pandemic, I enjoyed choosing which watch I'd wear each morning, so I preferred quantity over quality. Of course, these days I work from home and don't really go anywhere, and don't want to ick up my watches with all the soap and water or hand sanitizer, so they're all safely in my drawer ... waiting for a vaccine so we can all go back to normal.

BASEBALL!

It's here! My guys are back within The Friendly Confines!

It was a uniquely 2020 Opening day. They began the game wearing face masks and honoring both the National Anthem and Black Lives Matter. (Because we can and should do both.)

My darling Rizz shares his hand sanitizer. (He also got a homerun!)



Bill Murray sang the stretch from the safety of his home, and with the companionship of his own personal Cubby.

They won. Of course. But you know, I would have been happy even if they hadn't. I am watching my guys be great role models as they play America's Game when America needs it most.

 Love, love, love,

I LOVE Comcast!

It's Opening Day, and I can watch it! Overnight, the Cubs and Comcast came to a (literally) last minute agreement and I can see Kyle Hendricks toss out the first pitch of this abbreviated Cubs season.

Last year, the Cubs and their long, LONG time network, WGN, amicably parted company. It made sense for WGN because they want to be viewed as a national channel and carrying the Cubs and the Blackhawks is just a bit too local. Also, with 160 games in the (regular) regular MLB season and 80+ (under normal circumstances) for the NHL, that's a lot of broadcast time to dedicate. So while I didn't like it, I got it.

What I didn't understand was the Cubs next move. Instead of signing a deal with the local ABC affiliate or the NBC Sports channel, who both appeared very willing, they started their own cable channel: The Marquee Sports Network. Maybe that was a good idea. In this cut-the-cord environment, I'm not so sure, but there are people more learned than I advising them.

But they got super greedy. They immediately cut a deal with AT&T and went on to (pardon the pun) play hardball with Comcast/Xfinity, and the vast majority of fans in Chicago have Comcast. They were asking what Comcast considered an unreasonable amount, and Comcast kept saying "no."

The Ricketts family, who owns the Cubs, was betting that we would follow our team anywhere. And we are fabulously loyal. But we can also read.

Marquee Network is part of the Sinclair Broadcast Group. Aka "Trump TV." This isn't surprising, since the Ricketts family is all-in with our President. That's their right. I don't approve of toxic FOX/Sinclair News, but then my recourse is to simply get my news elsewhere.

But I'm not switching from Comcast to support that swill. Comcast has given me good service in every sense of the word -- including MSNBC, which is the antithesis of FOX/Sinclair -- and I'm not leaving, even for my Cubs. I was prepared to just watch games on my computer or listen on the radio. (See post below.)

Apparently I'm not the only Cubs fan of conscience, because the mass exodus from Comcast to AT&T just didn't happen. And things just started getting harder and harder for Cubs management.

•  The pandemic, part 1. With the ballpark closed to the public, they're not getting revenue from ticket sales, hotdogs and parking. They need whatever Comcast is willing to pay.

•  The pandemic, part 2. We need baseball. We're sad, we're confused. We're in the midst of a virus that can kill us and racial unrest that can kill us and baseball is America's game. Keeping it from us to gouge Comcast is not a good look for the Ricketts family.

•  Trump. He's sending Federal troops to Chicago to ... well, that's not clear. He keeps talking about lawless gangs of immigrants and everyone here knows that is not the root of the gun violence plaguing our city. It's illegal guns flooding in from neighboring states with lax gun laws and it's young men dealing drugs because they can't find work. If Trump wants to send ATF to get the guns off the streets, that would be helpful. If he wants to do something about infrastructure and add shovel-ready jobs to the economy, that would be even better! But instead his reckless talk is dissing and endangering our citizens for cheap political points. Trump's timing regarding Chicago could not be worse for the Cubs management, especially poor Todd Ricketts, the RNC fundraising chairman. (I can just imagine his siblings boxing Todd's ears and yelling, "You're supposed to stop Trump from doing stupid shit like this!")

So last night, the Ricketts family blinked. And this morning, just 12 hours away from the first pitch, Marquee was on Channel 202!

So this is it for a while

The Cubs still don't have a deal with Comcast/Xfinity. Which means this is how games look to me. I watch on my computer, with MLB Gameday graphics and the mellow tones of Cubs radio announcer, Pat Hughes.

Opening Day is Friday. I am still hopeful that there will be a deal and I can watch it on my TV. Rizzo needs me!

 

She was kind

Today I had my long-awaited mammogram.  I told the tech about soreness between my armpit and shoulder, and asked her to please, please make sure she got clear pictures of that area.

It took me a long time to get an appointment at this hospital -- since it's the local hub for corona virus treatment, they quit doing mammograms for a while in March and recently resumed -- but I wanted to come here because they have, literally, decades of my mammograms at their fingertips. It paid off today in peace of mind.

The technician knew how frightened I was and told me that, as near as she could tell, there was nothing on this year's pictures that wasn't there last year.

Now she's not a doctor. A specialist in medical imaging will review my films and make a report. She was very clear in emphasizing that. But, she said, if she saw something obvious there,* we'd be talking about the humidity or all the ways the corona virus has effected hospital protocol ... anything but this.

I am over 60 and overweight. I never had a baby. My paternal grandmother had breast cancer. I drink caffeine. None of these things are good and I must be careful. I went through this in 2009, and now I'm going through it again.

But the tech did make me feel better. So now I will try to relax as I wait for the official word and, if necessary, next steps.

*And she's been doing this almost 20 years.

Me and Al

Some classic movie fans love Westerns. They can name which California canyon is being used for Wyoming or Colorado or Texas. They can compare and contrast John Ford and Henry Hathaway. I admire their passion, but I don't share it. I think it goes back to my deep ambivalence for John Wayne.*

Which is why I was surprised by what happened at our classic movie Meet Up for My Darling Clementine. It was the first time I'd seen this 1946 classic. I was enthusiastic because Henry Fonda is completely adorable, but I don't know as much about the movie or the genre as Ted and Carol, a pair of Western fanatics who met on a blind date more than 25 years ago and married because, as he said, "She said John Ford was her favorite director."

Yet as the Meet Up was winding down, one of the regulars, Jean, made a point of saying, "I'm so glad the Gal and Al are here. I always appreciate what you two have to say."

It made me glow as thought I'd swallowed a moonbeam.

Some of the things I said this week undoubtedly seemed remedial to Ted and Carol. But, since I'd never seen this Western before, I mentioned that the thing that struck me most -- other than rekindling my crush on Henry Fonda -- was how influential it was. There's a scene toward the beginning where Doc Holliday wants to shoot it out with Wyatt Earp. Sheriff Earp/Fonda calmly opens his jacket to show he's not wearing a gun.

"The peace-loving sheriff without a gun!" I gushed. "I've seen that a million times! I thought, 'Andy Griffith.' And then I realized this must be the movie that started the trope! Am I right?"

Then our moderator, Will, shared that Cathy Downs was not the first or even second choice to play the Clementine of the title, I was enthusiastic about the other casting choices -- especially Jeanne Crain -- because they would have provided a more charismatic counterbalance to sultry Linda Darnell. (She dominates the picture. Just look at the poster. That chick is not Clementine.) "Good girls don't have to be dull!" I insisted.

Al talked a lot about Walter Brennan in the supporting role as evilest bad guy ever, which shocked him because Brennan is better known for warm, avuncular types: the pastor in Sgt. York, Lou Gehrig's dad in Pride of the Yankees. He also shared some cool anecdotes about director John Ford (who was quite a character), but most of the discussion was dominated by Ted and Carol.

I don't begrudge Ted and Carol their expertise or their passion for the subject. Not only Westerns in general but the shootout at the OK Corral in particular. They knew who really died that day and what kind of guns were actually used (rifles, not pistols). They even visited Wyatt Earp's grave in California! Besides, this group is about sharing knowledge and passion for old movies. But it did feel like they were the teachers and Al and I (and the other dozen or so attendees) were the pupils.

So it was nice and very unexpected of Jean to say that. I think, perhaps, she wasn't talking about just Tuesday night, but every one of our Meet Ups.

*OK, it's not ambivalence. Can't stand him.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

To participate, and to see how others responded, click here. 

1. What are you currently reading? The Nine of Us: Growing Up Kennedy by Jean Kennedy Smith. Among Joe and Rose Kennedy's nine children were war heroes, world leaders, diplomats and philanthropists, even a noblewoman. This extraordinary clan literally changed the world. Shortly after marrying into it, Jackie said her husband and his siblings were like soda water, and that next to them, the rest of world seemed flat.

Jean Kennedy was eighth of those nine. This is her memoir. So far, it's a rosy and uncritical look at the family she grew up in and admired. It's certainly not the most balanced account of "growing up Kennedy," but it's loving and lovely and I'm enjoying it thoroughly.
 

2. What did you recently finish reading? Open and Shut by David Rosenfelt. What a happy surprise this book was! Here David Rosenfelt has been writing this entertaining series since 2002, and its taken me a long time to reach for his first Andy Carpenter mystery. 

Defense attorney Andy Carpenter is a charming protagonist and I rooted for him from the get-go. He has a smart mouth and he's not afraid to use it. He also loves baseball, dogs, justice, and his dad. His father, Nelson Carpenter, was a well-respected, retired DA who makes a strange request -- he wants his son to handle the appeal of a man Nelson himself prosecuted and put on death row. Before Andy can find out why, his father suddenly drops dead. Going through his father's personal papers, another huge family secret is revealed.

It's an exciting courtroom drama but there's quite a bit of action outside the halls of justice, too. The tension in this book comes from all Andy has to lose: emotionally, financially, professionally and physically. The story has lots of twists and turns and I admit it had me fooled at one point. I love that.

3.  What will you read next? I don't know.

Zoom Zoom Zoom-a Zoom

Not really us, but it could be

We had a 4-hour Zoom meeting with my clients. A virtual workshop. At the beginning and end of the meeting, when we met as a group, there were 28 of us. For the gist of the meeting, we were in smaller groups of 7. So far, because of Covid19, I've worshipped via video conference, consulted my GP via video conference, critiqued movies via video conference, met with my therapist via video conference, and now brainstormed with clients via video conference. It's not optimal, but it's safe and worked better than I thought it would.

I argued to be included in this client meeting. Originally it was just supposed to be strategy and account, but thanks to my whining and the new Mr. Big's considerable muscle, representatives from the creative team were included, too. Then I started to worry. Would I do a good job? Do I have enough to contribute? Would my cat Reynaldo moon the participants?

I think I did a good job. I know I contributed. Reynaldo came up on my lap for a head rub or two, but otherwise kept a low profile.

However, the police came. Yes, I had to leave my video conference because there was a cop at my door. It amused my fellow conferees to know that officer wanted me to move my white Mercedes or it would be towed. Because I didn't mute my mic, they heard me tell the cop, "I wish I had a white Mercedes!"

So it was all fine. I'd been worried for nothing. It occurs to me that I worry all the time for nothing.

Tomorrow is my long-awaited mammogram. Let's hope it turns out that in regards to that, I've been worrying for nothing, too.

Get ready to get happy

Every year I take the August Happiness Challenge. Here's a brief explanation of the Challenge: "Each day in August you are to post about something that makes *you* happy. Pretty simple. And, it doesn't even have to be every day if you don't want it to be. It's a great way to remind ourselves that there are positive things going on in our lives, our communities, and the world."

You're invited to join me. Visit me with a link to your daily August happy, and I'll come read it. I've found that experiencing other peoples' everyday pleasures is a great mood lifter.

It helps if your August Happiness Challenge posts are marked with an icon. Just something that means "happy" to you. Here's a pair of my past happys.

THE HAPPY BEGINS AUGUST 1!

A perfect little lunch hour of errands

Today was the first day in several that wasn't beastly hot, so I slipped outside and appreciated it.

First stop, the food pantry. I had quite a bit to donate today because over the past 10 days or so, I haven't felt like hiking over there in the heat, rain and humidity. Today was a good day for a good deed. Both the kid volunteering at the pantry and I were wearing Cub masks, a coincidence we acknowledged and enjoyed.

Naturally I took this to mean that Cub fans are simply good people. I feel sorry for anti-maskers because not only are they unwilling to do the smallest thing to show their neighbors they care, they are missing an opportunity for self expression. Represent what you love on your mask!

Next stop, the post office. The street in front of the big, venerable old building is torn up and it was hard to navigate the saw horses and safety cones. Especially in my most beat up/worn out old sandals. Plus, I haven't been to the chiropractor since mid-March and, just as he warned me, my balance isn't all it could be. So you guessed it: I slipped on my way up cement stairs.

Someone instantly appeared at my side, helping me up by the elbow. I wasn't hurt -- just embarrassed -- and didn't need his assistance but I recognized him. He's the homeless guy who usually sits on the curb (only the curb isn't there right now). I thanked him, blamed my tumble on my sandals (which was kinda true), and started for the door, which he held open for me.

"You've done right by me, ma'am, so I am happy to help you."

I was touched by his chivalry, his concern and his apparent pride in being able to turn tables and this time, do something for me. It was a lovely moment.

Disinfectant wipes are in ready supply at the drugstore! Beyond that, there was nothing to report from my last stop. Then back to work!

SUNDAY STEALING

She's practically perfect in every way

QUESTIONS FROM FACEBOOK

1. What's your favorite movie from your childhood and why? Mary Poppins. First of all, because it's a wonderful movie. Second, because it's the first movie I ever saw in the theater, on the big screen. Like just about everyone else who's able to fog up a mirror, I got Disney+ this month so I could binge on Hamilton. Must remember to spend some time with my girl, Mary, too, before the month is over and I cancel my subscription.

2. What is home to you? The humble abode where I'm sitting right now.

3. Do you get emotionally invested in stories? (I'm asking about movies, books, tv shows, whatever medium you like your stories in.) Yes.

4. What is the most physical damage you've ever received without needing medical intervention (so no stitches or splints or anything)? Well, the worst pain I've ever been in was courtesy of a kidney stone. I'd rather have surgery again that suffer a repeat of that. I was given meds for it but there was no stitches or splints or anything.

5. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Ya got me there.

6. Do you have any obsessions? Like Tv shows, or cats or something. Not addictions.

I love them.

7. What question or question would you like God to answer? I really don't have anything. I believe that when I die and get to Heaven, I'll enjoy eternal life and eternal peace, which means I'll understand the answers to all my questions.

8. Do you bite your nails? Of course! If I tried to bite someone else's, I'd get in big trouble.


9. What do you like about the place you live? (I mean your housing, apt, house, mobile home, etc.) All my stuff is here.

10. What do you like about the city or town where you live? It's diverse. We aren't perfect, but we are trying to be better at understanding one another and making everyone feel welcome.

11. Is there one place you have visited that you wish you could live there? I could see myself living in Brookline, MA. When I vacationed in Boston, I took a little sidetrip there to see JFK's birthplace and just really enjoyed the town.

12. What's your favorite cookie to snack on? I like them all!

13. Are you a Apple person or PC type person and why? Yes. I have an Apple computer and an Android smartphone. MacBooks are easy to use, Motorola phones are easy to afford.

14. What's your favorite things about the Zoo? I like the people watching and the junk food. As the animals go, my favorite is the okapi. They're related to the giraffe and, despite the stripes, have no zebra in their bloodline. They're shy with people but social with one another, making this cute little "chuff" noise.

15. Did you grow up in the country, city or small town and what did you like about it (or hate about it if you didn’t like it)? I grew up in the same small town my parents grew up in. I didn't care for all the sameness. All WASP. Catholics were exotic. I never met a Jew until high school and the district included kids from nearby towns. Growing up this way is not healthy. The earlier we meet different kinds of people, the better.

16. What kinds of things were you into and do when you were growing up? I played Barbies and rode my bike.

17 .Do you enjoy receiving letters or postcards more, and why? Yes. Because it means someone I love thinks enough of me to write and send it.

18. Do or did you know any of your great-grandparents? Tell me about them. I knew Bunna, my mom's grandmother. Her given name was Louise, but since my mother was her oldest grandchild and called her "Bunna," the whole family did. She smelled funny and wore massive, floral house dresses and died when I was in junior high. I thought she was really bossy, but my mother loved her to the moon. When my mom was tiny, Bunna always made sure she had fruit cocktail with a cherry with dinner. That meant the world to my mother.


19. Do you like to be outdoors? What is your favorite thing to do there? I like to walk and wander.

20. Have you ever broken a bone or been badly injured? Yes. When I was in pre-school, I fell down the stairs and broke my clavicle. I don't remember the pain at all, but I do recall being in a sling.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Flipper (1964)
 
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

1) Flipper ran for three seasons, from 1964 to 1967. Are you familiar with the show? Were you a fan? Yes. Many friends were in love with the blond brother. 1964 is historic as the year I fell in love with Paul McCartney and, though I was only six years old, I was determined to remain true to him. Still I did bow to peer pressure and watch the show. You know, so I could discuss it at recess. Reviewing the clip linked above, I'm now impressed by how hot the dad was. (It's okay; I've learned over the intervening decades that Sir Paul doesn't care one whit who I lust after.)


2) Brothers Sandy and Bud consider a bottle-nosed dolphin, named Flipper, their pet. Do you currently share your home with any animals? 

Connie is looking at the camera, Reynaldo is sound asleep

3) Bud and Sandy's dad was Chief Warden Porter Ricks of the fictional Coral Key Marine Preserve. In reality, the show was filmed in Miami and Key Biscayne. When were you last in the ocean? Which ocean was it? It was Christmastime. I waded into the Atlantic while visiting Henry and Reg in Key West. I've made my hotel reservation to see them for Christmas this year, but I'm worried that I won't be able to make it because of the pandemic. This makes me very, very sad.

4) There was no one single "Flipper." In close-ups, the role was played by a dolphin named Susie. While Susie was good at interacting with people, she had trouble with stunts, and sometimes a male dolphin named Clown was brought in for action sequences. Do you consider yourself more social, like Susie? Or are you more athletic, like Clown? If those are my only two choices, I'll go with Susie.

5) Without looking it up, do you know the difference between a dolphin and a porpoise? Dolphins have noses. Porpoises have more fishy faces without a prominent nose. I'm sure there are other differences, but to list them I'd have to cheat and look it up.

6) Flipper wasn't just a TV pet. He was an industry! During the show's run, Flipper comic books, coloring books and puzzles were very popular. As an adult, do you entertain yourself by reading comics, coloring, or completing jigsaw puzzles? Nope.

7) The Flipper lunchbox was also a big seller. It came with a Thermos topped with a red cup. Do you own a Thermos? Nope.
 
8) In 1964, when Flipper premiered, it was up against The Outer Limits and The Jackie Gleason Show. If those were your only viewing choices, would you watch the family show about the dolphin, the sci-fi anthology show, or the comedy-variety show? (Or would your rather flip through a magazine?) Flipper. Definitely Flipper.

9) Random question  -- Which would you be more comfortable explaining: how a car engine works, the current IRS tax brackets, or the rules of baseball? Baseball! I love that game. There's a rule that ONLY applies to my beloved Wrigley Field: if a ball lodges in the outfield ivy, the outfielder is supposed to raise his arm in the air. Then the ball is considered dead and the batter is awarded second base. If the outfielder foolishly tries to dig the ball out of the ivy, play continues and the batter will undoubtedly take an inside the park home run. Have you missed baseball this summer as much as I have?

Boundaries, Gal! Boundaries!

I love my friends. They are the family I chose. I work at being available. I worry and research options to help them solve their problems. I realize that sometimes I do more than I'm asked, and just as often I'm asked to accept more than I should. I'm OK with the former, but I'm working on the latter.

Which is why last night I hung up on Kathy. I feel guilty about it. On the other hand, I could tell that the conversation was going nowhere good and I have to look out for myself at times, too.

Wednesday she sent me a rather cryptic text about how "weird" the world has become, and wondering how I was faring in it. Yes, the world is weird, but really no weirder than it was in April. Last night (Thursday) I called her. She didn't pick up, and I didn't leave a message. After all, I have no statement to make and wasn't sure what she wanted.

A few minutes later, she called me back. She wanted to know what I wanted. I told her I was responding to her Wednesday text. She asked me what she said. Huh? 

I asked her about her family camping trip to Baraboo, WI. She posted photos on Facebook and I was curious about two things: 1) Why was no one wearing masks at this multigenerational gathering? After all, Linda is 72; 2) How did she get along with her ex? They divorced back in the 1980s, and at times their relationship has been contentious, but he's resurfacing in her life more and more. What gives?

It took her so long to answer the first question, I never got to ask the second. It seems the younger generation has bought into the herd immunity theory.  I get it, as a theory. I'm not sure I could look my frightened grandmother in the eye -- and Kathy is, indeed, worried about Covid19 -- and discount her discomfort, though. They're also already refusing a vaccine that isn't yet available. This all sounds selfish and insane to me, but it's her family, not mine. More than once as she rambled her way through this tale, she said things like, "Thank you for being patient," and "Sometimes I think I'm going nuts."

I addressed that comment directly. "A bad memory doesn't make you crazy. It just means you have a bad memory."

To show solidarity with her on the family thing, I told her about the drama surrounding my niece's wedding. She said, "You know, if you ask me about any of this tomorrow I won't remember." Huh? That is not a normal thing to say in conversation.

"Why would I ask you about any of this?" I asked. She had no answer. When I was done, she told me she'd been to "a clinic" to have a mammogram and a bone density test. I asked her when she was going to see her doctor. After all, she has Medicare and some supplement plan, she should take advantage of them. Plus, this is not the first time her cognitive issues have shown up on my radar.

"I don't want anything in my record."

Huh?

I said, "You're concerned about your memory. You should see a doctor and see if you can't get help with it."

"I'm not concerned about my memory."

Huh?

"Kathy! You've mentioned it several times in this half hour call! It could be something that's easily treated ..." I have researched this. Hypothyroidism, vitamin deficiency or poor blood flow can all contribute to memory loss. I know she's worried about dementia, so why not try to get it diagonosed so she can maybe stop worrying?

I didn't get to say any of this because she literally hissed at me. "Let it go, Gal," she said in a threatening voice. "I mean it."

What the ever-loving fuck? If you don't want me to comment on your bad memory, quit mentioning your bad memory. Stop putting neon around it. And do not use that tone of voice with me!

"I'm hanging up now," I said. "I hope you're happier next time we talk."

Click.

I surprised myself by doing this. Usually I would stay on the phone with her and try to calm her down. I would make sure she understood that I care about her, and get how her fear drives her reactions.

But then I thought, "she doesn't get to treat me that way." After all, I am in this relationship, too. She gave no consideration to how she was talking to me, or how it made me feel.

We've exchanged texts twice since last night. Kathy admitted that, after the family vacation, her daughter expressed similar concern about her memory and promised to be there more for her mom. She also appreciates that she shouldn't have spoken to me that aggressively, that I was responding out of concern.

So we're good! I stood up for myself, and nothing bad happened. 

Of course, I'm still worried about her health and safety. That hasn't abated. But I've learned something important about myself in my personal relationships. Not as important, I know, as what Kathy's dealing with, but it's growth for me.

Blunt force truth right here

I first became familiar with Chuck Woolery when my kid sister was very young. He played wacky mailman Mr. Dingle on The New Zoo Revue, one of her favorite early-morning shows. He is better-known as the host of the dating show, The Love Connection. Today he is an outspoken proponent of conservative politics. It's amusing that the people who holler the loudest about celebrities involving themselves in current affairs are the ones who voted for a reality show host who feels very comfortable quoting Chuck Woolery.

First Mr. Woolery declared himself "sick" of all the lies about Covid 19. Then he had to share that his son is literally sick, with Covid 19.

Mr. Woolery then deleted his Twitter account.

"Blunt Force Truth" is Chuck Woolery's brand. Sadly, he just got smacked with blunt force truth about the pandemic.

•  Stay home as much as you can
•  Wear a mask when you go out
•  Wash your hands often
•  If you come down with the corona virus and your doctor prescribes Remdesivir, take it

If you don't believe me, or Dr. Fauci, or the CDC, ask your own doctor. A real person who is more to you than just a screen name. The internet is delightful and good for many things -- hell, I'm on it right now -- but it can be a cesspool of misinformation. If you are skeptical about anything you read about the corona virus, ask your own doctor.

Stay safe. Save lives. Wear a mask.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

1. What are you currently reading? Open and Shut by David Rosenfelt. Defense attorney Andy Carpenter is my kinda guy -- he loves baseball, dogs, and lost causes. He also has a smart mouth. So even if I wasn't enjoying the mystery, I'd probably enjoy this book.
 

But I am enjoying the mystery. Why did Andy's father -- a legendary prosecutor -- insist Andy take on the appeal of a man he put on death row? Poor Andy will never know, because his father dies suddenly ... and more family secrets are revealed.

There's a lot at stake for Andy: emotionally, professionally and physically. His sense of humor not only makes us cheer for him, it makes the tension easier to take. So far, this is a highly entertaining read.

2. What did you recently finish reading? Royal Holiday by Jasmine Guillory. Disclosure: I hate hot, humid weather, and that's why I reached for this book. I wanted to read about Christmastime, bracing winds and the need for hot tea and fireplaces. On that level, this book really delivered. However, it let me down in other areas.

It has a fun chick-lit premise. Vivian, a 50-something Bay area social worker, is whisked away to London for Christmas week. Her adult daughter gets a dream assignment with the Royal Family and brings mom along so they won't be apart on Christmas. While her daughter is hard at work, Vivian enjoys a lovely little holiday romance. However, after Christmas, neither Vivian nor her new love interest, Malcolm, are able to just let it go.
       

Where this fell apart for me was in the depictions of Vivian and Malcolm. Even though they traded narration duties, chapter by chapter, I never felt I knew them. They each had fascinating occupations (she's a social worker in a hospital, helping families in crisis; he's personal secretary/advisor to the Queen herself in matters of Parliament), but all we really know of their jobs is that she loves her and he's frustrated by his. Not enough.

A smaller but equally annoying point: After New Year's, when an ocean and a continent separate them, they communicate by post cards. Nice, romantic and perfectly in keeping with people in their 50s who might feel they spend too damn much time with their email accounts. But here's the thing: I send postcards, too. No one on earth could handwrite such long messages on the back of postcards. Such sloppiness took me out of the action, over and over again, through the end of the story when I really wanted to be engaged.

In short: It's a three-star premise with a two-star execution. If you go into it with managed expectations, and take it for what it is, you may enjoy it.

3.  What will you read next? Maybe a biography. Or another mystery. My TBR pile is stacked dauntingly high with both.  

 

The "truth" about Remdesivir

Is this like looking in the mirror?

Do you believe that profits from Remdesivir line Dr. Anthony Fauci's pockets? Maybe you should take off your tinfoil hat and instead put on a mask to protect your neighbors.

It isn't true that Dr. Fauci benefits.

Have you heard that Remdesivir is the product of a vast, worldwide pharmaceutical conspiracy that can be traced back to Hillary Clinton and George Soros?

It simply isn't true.

Do you believe that person you never actually met but who posted online that she knows someone who knows a doctor who "admitted" masks won't help stop the spread of the corona virus? Why don't you just call your own doctor?

Even Fox News confirms the value of wearing a mask.

There is much about the Trump Presidency that depresses me, but nothing more than this: He's contributed to the growing mistrust of doctors, the CDC and the mainstream media (now including Fox). Demographically speaking, 53% of voters over 65 voted for Trump in 2016. 51% of those between 50 and 64 also chose Trump over Clinton. This is important because those voters are now 3 1/2 years older. 3 1/2 years more vulnerable. I may disagree with my paranoid online brothers and sisters, and despise the way they parrot misinformation without checking it, but I don't want them to get sick. Or die.

Don't listen to me about Remdesivir vs. hydroxychloroquine or the importance of masks. Don't listen to anyone you only know as a screen name. Talk to your own doctor. You know, an MD or nurse practitioner who has, at some point, actually listened to your heart and taken your temperature. Don't become a Covid19 statistic.

Look at this way: if you're dead, you can't vote for Trump/Pence in 2020.