Monday, February 20, 2012

Trifecta

This week's challenge: Use the third definition exactly as it appears below and weave it into a stunning work of art of between 33 and 333 words.


fool noun \ˈfül\

1   : a person lacking in judgment or prudence
a : a retainer formerly kept in great households to provide casual entertainment and commonly dressed in        motley with cap, bells, and bauble
    b : one who is victimized or made to appear foolish : dupe
a : a harmlessly deranged person or one lacking in common powers of understanding




I was stuck next to our coats. She was opposite me, having slid into the booth beside my husband.

I appraised her with an experienced eye: mid-30s, pert breasts, tight ringlets. I almost said, “1985 wants its hair back,” but that was trite and besides, I was tired.

Poodle Perm touched his hard bicep. “How does he bathe his wings in hot sauce and still stay in this shape?” Her finger lingers in an intimate, possessive gesture. But I don’t think they’ve had sex yet. Probably just a Clintonian moment in the front seat of our car.

I was going to ask how she knew we’d be here tonight, but I realize he told her. He wanted this confrontation. He's enjoying it.

They both work at the airport. He’s a baggage handler, she’s a secretary. Oh, the tales she told me about my mate of more than 25 years. In the breakroom, his favorite song came on and he started dancing with such abandon he didn’t realize he was in front of the dartboard! Lucky she pulled him out of the way! He called her from the runway but by the time she picked up, he forgot what he wanted to ask her. So he stammered and then sang, “I just called to say I love you, I just called to say how much I care.” He often sneaks offsight for beers, and she lowers her voice as she explains how she takes care of his timecard for him.

“Honey,” I almost say, “I know he’s high maintenance. I work a 70-hour week to support this functioning alcoholic so he can waste his pay on booze and blow. By the time I get home he’s encouraging our son to join him, farting around on Facebook, ignoring his homework and disregarding me as a workaday drudge. If you think you can handle my husband, you’re welcome to him. You may be enchanted by a boyish fool, but I live the corrosive reality.”


 

10 comments:

  1. Ha!
    I'm not sure which character is the bigger fool! What a fun read!
    http://www.kimnelsonwrites.com/2012/02/20/gambled-away/

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  3. This is my favorite line: "Her finger lingers in an intimate, possessive gesture. But I don’t think they’ve had sex yet. Probably just shared a Clintonian moment in the front seat of our car." I think it invokes the spirit of the thrid definiton of "fool." I suspect a lot of us are still trying to figure out if Clinton was a harmless horndog or something worse than a fool.

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  4. oh my - I was going to say something about the "Clintonian moment in the front seat . . " but I see Nicole beat me to it.

    Gal . . . this was a great read. Not sure I would be able to bite my tongue as well.

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  5. My favorite line; I almost said, “1985 wants its hair back,” but that was trite and besides, I was tired.

    this was a great read!

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  6. A really fun read. Loved the snakiness of the wife.

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  7. Corrosive reality. That's very good. And I love the tension here. The wife won't rise to the bait and conftont the girlfriend, but she also won't leave her deadbeat husband.

    http://jesterqueen.com

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  8. Hmm, I wonder who is the actual fool: the wife or the husband.

    And interesting little menage a trois you've crafted. I don't think I would have stuck around with a loser like that. Let the 80's wanna-be have him :)

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  9. Thanks for linking up to this week's Trifecta Challenge. Clintonian moment. It's perfect. It's genius. This was, as the others have said, highly readable. You've added some really great details--the dart board, the terrible phone calls, the biceps. Very nicely done. Hope to see you back for the weekend challenge.

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  10. That last paragraph is a zinger. Perfect.

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