So my niece said to me as I was cutting through the Old Navy parking lot, on my way home after stopping at Walgreen's and Petco. I'm not used to her being able to drive and turning up in my neighborhood (though you can't blame her, since it is much cooler than hers). And what are the odds that I would be running errands just as she was finished shopping the after Christmas sale at Old Navy?
We had hot chocolate together at the coffee shop inside Border's and she updated me about college. She's trying to make peace with not being able to go to school in Denver. Even though she has been accepted and has earned a $9000 grant to cover her room and board. It's frustrating because my sister will not help by filling out the required financial paperwork because she equates giving her money for school with cosigning for the loan. It's pure stubbornness and ignorance. My sister could talk to the counselors or my niece's favorite teacher so she could better understand the situation, but she won't. I think she's embarrassed or ashamed of their finances. Which is stupid. And selfish. And annoying.
I don't know what to do about this. It's frustrating, because there's not much I can do. I would love to cosign a loan for her, using my condo as collateral, except that I know at some point, sooner rather than later, I'm going to have to use it to care for my mother as her health deteriorates. My mom is broke and there is no one else to help her but me.
I'm so sick of thinking about money.
So instead I'll just concentrate on how happy it was to just run into my niece like that, and how much I enjoy spending time with her.
These are the thoughts and observations of me — a woman of a certain age. (Oh, my, God, I'm 65!) I'm single. I'm successful enough (independent, self supporting). I live just outside Chicago, the best city in the world. I'm an aunt and a friend. I feel that voices like mine are rather underrepresented online or in print. So here I am. If my musings resonate with you, please visit my blog again sometime.
No one should be embarrassed about finances. In our country right now you're of the elite if you even have a job. I know you are proud of your her. I'm glad she has you to help her with the life lessons she needs.
ReplyDeletePride...your sister needs to get over it and help her daughter.
ReplyDeleteWould you like me to slap your sister upside the head? I'll let you return the favor sometime. How does she not realize it's not about her?
ReplyDeleteKwiz is channeling me today - she keeps saying my exact thoughts.
ReplyDeleteDo what you can, as you can and know it's enough.
Remember that bit of info I sent you about your niece. She's gonna be fine no matter where she goes to school. :)