Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Feeling kinda creepy

This is one of those posts where I share an unpleasant truth about myself.

Yesterday afternoon, while riding the el home, I had a very, very drunk boy as my seatmate. He smelled like booze and stale cigarette smoke. No, he REEKED of booze and stale cigarette smoke. He kept weaving and sliding in his sleep and often leaned into me. I COULD NOT STAND IT, so I woke him up so I could change my seat. I hoped I didn't hurt his feelings, but I COULD NOT STAND IT.

The part I felt bad about is this: I get off at one stop before the end of the line. I should have awakened him before I exited the train, just to make sure he got home safe. I didn't. I don't know why I didn't ... I think it's because I was so physically creeped out about myself.

This morning, while riding the el to work, I was near an entire smelly family. Mom, Dad and Baby. Sweat and cigarettes mixed with urine wafted my way. They were alert and chatting among themselves. Dad wore a lanyard and badge that showed he was an official vendor of Streetwise, the newspaper sold by Chicago's homeless. So I know they were industrious and probably doing the best they could to keep it together. Yet when I saw the pack of Newports in Mom's pocket, I wanted to yell, "Instead of cigarettes, why not buy SOAP?" But I just got up and stood by the door.

These people are my neighbors. I shouldn't be so judgemental. I am not proud of myself right now. But I want my blog to be an accurate portrait of myself at this point in my life, and this is part of who I am. (Unfortunately.)


  1. yes, smelling folks freak me out too. sometimes, it just makes me sick to my stomach. i would have moved too...or barffed....icky!

  2. Anonymous4:46 PM

    I would have had the same response too. As much as I would like too, I just don't have much patience for people like that.

  3. You are human. That's what that is about. I'd have the same reaction, I fear. You do lots of things with a loving heart and that's the piece that matters. IMO anyway.

  4. You're too hard on yourself at times.

  5. Ditto to all above.

    Rode the T for two years into Boston, don't miss the BO and the guy touching himself. The best is the gas passer, you all can smell it, but nobody looks guilty.

    I am with you on the cigarette much is it a pack? Do we even get into the health costs? GRRR...don't get me started.

  6. And I'm also chiming in with a ditto.


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