I love this kid

I'm watching Abigail Breslin in The Ultimate Gift. It's pretty predictable holiday fare, but she's delightful. Again. I love this kid. I'm a total Abigail-head.

Movie Monday -- The Afterlife

Share your favorite movies about heaven, hell, resurrection, angels, demons or haunts, linking back here at The Bumbles.

On Halloween I saw Hereafter, the wonderful Clint Eastwood movie about the afterlife that's in theaters now. Since I just blogged about that one, I decided to muse about these two of an earlier vintage.

Heaven Can Wait. One minute, NFL QB Joe Pendelton is peddling his bike down a California highway, the next moment he's in a "waystation" between this world and the next. His guardian angel plucked him away from the scene just before the moment of impact, hoping to spare Joe a gruesome death. But his timing was off -- because of his superior reflexes, it was Joe's destiny to avoid the accident, and he would still be alive if the angel hadn't intervened. So now what? One of Heaven's higher-ranking "escorts," Mr. Jordan, tries to find another body for Joe to live in until his pre-destined moment, years in the future. At first Joe rejects the body, and the new life, he's given to inhabit. But then he meets Betty and falls in love ... Warren Beatty and Julie Christie are Joe and Betty, and they are so dear and sweet and romantic. While I'm not sure I believe that destiny has but one perfect person for us to love, this movie makes a most convincing argument.

Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol. Dickens gave us the Marley and the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future, and Mr. Magoo gave me my first and still most favorite Scrooge.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 14 :: A hero that has let you down (write a letter)

Dear Mr. President:

Every time I think of you, that old Laura Nyro song starts playing in my head. You know the one, "BILL! I love you so, I always will ..."

And I did and I do. But you broke my heart.

It wasn't the infidelity that bothered me. Hell, I'm a Kennedy girl. I grew up believing we can and should separate personal behavior from public performance.

It was the way you allowed your good ol' boy horndog behavior to seep from the personal to the public that makes me nuts. You did a young and emotionally vulnerable girl in the Oval Office! How did you think you were going to get away with that? And I don't for a moment think you cared for that poor kid. You saw more interesting, more attractive women every day on the rope line in front of the White House (remember, this was before 9/11 when we could tour 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue). You chose her simply because she was there, and you did her simply because you could. And then you not only lied about it, you demeaned her ("I never had sexual relations with that woman ..."). The imbalance of power between you two and your fates appalls me. YOU were the most powerful man in the free world, YOU were the one with a wife and daughter (a daughter not that much older than your mistress). Yet today you remain one of the most popular men on the planet, and she's a punchline, a synonym for oral sex. How is that fair?

You're a good man and you have done a lot of good. But you had the capacity to do more and be a great man. I believed in you, and you let me down. You let the nation down. And you let yourself down. Every account of your presidency will include the phrase, "impeached by the House of Representatives."

And yet ... and yet ... When you talk about the Clinton Global Initiative, I'm transfixed. When I watched you walk Chelsea down the aisle, I got misty. Every time you have a health problem, I say a little prayer.

So even though you broke my heart, I love you so, and I always will.

Happy Birthday to me, Part One

My friend Kathy contacted me via Facebook Saturday night and wondered if we could meet for breakfast this morning. She remembered my birthday! This is very important to me, because Kathy has had plenty of career, health and money problems over the last three years or so. And yet, my birthday never slips her notice, and for that I am grateful.

She's either 62 or 63 now, and is learning graphic design because she has her sights set on a new career and dreams of being able to afford her own home. (Because of financial setbacks, she is living with her daughter, son-in-law and stepchildren.) At times Kathy exasperates me, but I admire faith in herself and hopes for the future.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: Another 14 Question Meme

Cheers to all of us thieves!

1. Lots of pillows or just one? Describe your pre-sleeping rituals. I sleep in a full-sized bed with two pillows. This is, I believe, rather standard.

2. What kind of books do you read? See the bar at right. As you can see from my blog template, I love books and I'm always reading something.

3. What are your neighbors like? There are eight condos on this floor, two empty. (Welcome to the age of foreclosure.) The six of us who remain are a pretty diverse lot: Newlyweds with a lot of tattoos, a couple that frequently has his college-aged son from a previous marriage staying with them, an older couple whose kids are gone but whose young granddaughter visits (and stops by to play with my cat, Reynaldo), a very nosy retiree, a family with a new baby, and me, the cat lady.

4. What's really creepy to you? Clowns. See? Even lovable George Bailey, Bedford Falls' favorite son, looks creepy in clown make-up.

5. What's your current fandom/obsession/addiction? The Beatles and the Cubs. If you needed to be told that, you don't come here often.

6. Do you prefer your junk food sweet, salty or savory? Yes. That's why I like Reese's Peanut Butter Cups so much.

7. What was the last thing you expensive bought? My airline ticket to Los Angeles (ORD-LAX) was $279.

8. What is your greatest fear? A plane crash.

9. Do you get cravings? If so, what do you crave? Yes. Mark Harmon.

10. What do you do to change your mood? Since Mark Harmon often isn't available, I listen to the Beatles.

11. What was the last meal you ate that you loved? Last weekend I had a huge, gut-buster breakfast of eggs, wheat toast, hashbrowns and a ribeye steak. And then I took a long nap.

12. Do you want to learn another language? If so, why? I am taking a weekend crash-course in Spanish this winter. I think it'll be fun. I chose Spanish because I have a friend and a coworker who are both fluent and can help me stay sharp.

13. What's something that you'd like to say to someone right now? "Come play with me." I miss my best friend very much.

14. What are you looking forward to? I have a lot of vacation time scheduled between now and the end of the year.

She's home

My friend's daughter is out of the hospital, back in the New York apartment she shares with her fiance, and planning a small wedding.

Her leukemia is in remission, yet she needs another round of chemotherapy and doctors are very guarded about her chances of surviving 5 years. This confuses Ed, because he loves his daughter and wants definitive answers where it seems there aren't any.

But while it doesn't look like she has a long and healthy life ahead of her, her death is no longer imminent. Last month they were rushing ahead with a small wedding because they believed his daughter's condition was terminal and she wanted to die married to the man she loves. Now the reason for the small, intimate wedding -- in New York instead of here in Chicago -- is that she doesn't want any of her girlfriends to see her gaunt and without hair.

Wanting to be a pretty bride is such a sweet, normal dream for a 24-year-old. Normalcy is just what this family needs right now, and this is very good news.

Well, that's done

My uncle was committed this week. He went into a hospital for tests on Tuesday and as of Friday, he was placed in a facility for seniors with Parkinson's.

He became a ward of the state back in March -- 8 months ago. Which means that the possibility of institutionalization has been hanging over his head for 8 months. That's how long it's taken the gears of bureaucracy to grind to this point. I don't doubt that losing his home and his freedom is awful for him, I'm grateful that it's finally over.

Everyone he meets for here on out will know him only as the man he is now: a broke and very ill old man who is not able to handle his own affairs. He won't have to pretend he is who he once was -- a dynamic self-made millionaire, a lion with the ladies, an athlete. Being able to let his guard down and be himself must be a relief.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Just What I Needed

1. Who was the last person who entered your life and was just what you needed? This past August, I met Bob and Margo. They're both in their 60s and have been together since college, more than 40 years. I met them at the Stadium Club, the exclusive bar for season-ticket holders within Wrigley Field. I may never see them again, but the time I spent with them had a real impact on me. Bob is newly retired and trying to adjust to all this time on his hands. Margo is having no trouble at all -- filled with ideas for cruises and projects. The thing I liked about them was their warmth, their obvious love for one another, and their unabashed Cub fandom. Margo actually carries a signed photo of herself with Ryan Theriot in the same album that features pictures of her grandchildren! They represent karma -- people who are nice and hardworking who played by the rules finally getting to enjoy what they have coming. I liked how they welcomed into their midst based on nothing more than our shared love of the Cubs, which made me feel way less geeky about bleeding Cubbie blue. I guess they are real life role models for me, even though they probably don't think of themselves as anything special.

2. What is one of your fondest childhood memories? When I was 7, my parents surprised me by taking me and my oldest friend to see the Beatles' HELP! at a drive-in. I was riding my bike and the three of them pulled up in an unfamiliar car, a blue station wagon. My dad had swapped cars with a coworker so we could have the back of the wagon to bounce around in when we screamed and cried over The Lads.

3. What would you like to be doing in 7 years? I'd like to be like Bob and Margo, contented and comfortable and completely Cub obsessed.

4. Tell us about a blogging pet peeve. Dopey comments. Like the time I wrote a long post about how much I liked Little Women and how much it influenced my perception of romance. And a blogger I barely knew commented that she never liked that book. ARRGH!

5. Tell us about a general pet peeve. People who take up too much space in public -- like taking up the bench in the locker room for their iPods or water bottles, or an extra seat on the el for a briefcase or back pack.

6. For one day, who would you like to trade places with? Bob and Margo (see Q1). Or maybe I'd just like them to adopt me.

7. Where is your least favorite place to be? Doctor's office waiting room

8. What do you like about fall? My sweaters

9. If you or someone you know are chronically late, do you believe it's the result of poor planning or choosing to be late? In my case, yes to both. In the morning, when I don't feel like going to work, I find all kinds of things to do to distract me from getting ready.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 13 :: A band or artist that got you through some tough days (write a letter) If you can't guess what follows, you don't visit here often

I checked libraryonline.com (addressing people of title) for how to begin a letter to a member of the peerage ...

Dear Sir:
I love you the same way I love blue skies and cool breezes. Because while I remember with clarity the moment I first fell in love with you during that historic February, 1964 appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show, I don't really recall what my life was like before you, and contemplating it without you is like trying to conceive of no more blue skies or cool breezes.
You have always been there, always soothing me with your voice. I remember listening to "And I Love Her" as my wobbly propeller plane made its way over the Gulf of Mexico because I somehow knew I wouldn't die while listening to you. When I suddenly became terrified as I dressed for my high school graduation ceremony because it not only meant the end of something I hated, it also meant the beginning of something unknown, I played "Get Back" over and over again. I have turned to "My Brave Face" when my heart was breaking and "No More Lonely Nights" when it was soaring.
I fell in love with you when I was 6 years old because you were so damn pretty with those bottomless brown eyes, impossibly long lashes and perfectly straight nose. And because your voice sounded exactly like it should, coming from that little rosebud mouth. I'm grateful that now, as you have passed your 68th birthday, I can see that I cast my lot with a man who has turned out to be worthy of such devotion. You and your first wife enjoyed a touching love story, sticking together through good times and bad and raising four kids who grew up to be productive adults (who all somehow managed to avoid brawls and rehab and the other pitfalls that plague celebrity children). You overcame career adversity -- finding yourself unemployed with the demise of the most famous band ever when you were just 28 -- and reinvented yourself. You could rest on your considerable laurels but you don't, still making new music and working harder than you need to with your live shows. You have lost both your parents, the Lovely Linda and many of your boyhood chums, and your second marriage was a humiliating debacle, but you have never gone under. I have come to realize that your real beauty is your talent, dignity and strength.
Thanks for sharing it with us.

Hurray!

My niece just found she was accepted by the school of her dreams! The timing couldn't be more perfect, because she's touring their campus this weekend.

I am immensely proud of, and excited for, her.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 12 :: Something you never get compliments on My pretty face. Because I don't have one. Even my own mother said I was "cute but not what you'd consider pretty."

Get Well, Jane Fonda

From USA Today:

Jane Fonda, 72, discovered a small tumor in her breast during a routing checkup a few weeks ago, her rep is confirming.

Here's to a talented and brave lady.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 11 :: Something people seem to compliment you the most on My presentation skills. I am enthusiastic and think fast on my feet. At this job, it almost seems as though my ability to sell the work is appreciated more than the work itself. OR, among people who don't really know me, my green eyes.

Today we celebrate those who served

Happy Veteran's Day.
And thank you.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 10 :: Someone you need to let go or wish you didn’t know
My oldest friend's daughter. I believe she's a nice girl, deep inside, but she's running amok, and I'm sorry I know about it. A high school freshman, she began smoking pot and cigarettes over the summer, has been making out with other girls, and posts comments like "Itz Halloween motherfuckers" and "u r a fag but my fag" on her Facebook page.

I have mentioned to my oldest friend that her daughter needs a tighter leash, that more attention should be paid, but to no avail. I realize that since I am a barren spinster, mothers don't appreciate my parenting tips. I plan to "unfriend" the girl if things don't look different by the end of the month. Reading her words and learning of her activities bother me, and there's nothing I can do about it, so knowing it serves no purpose.

I Want Wednesday

I want $455. To stay on budget, I need $740 to get me to payday on Tuesday. I have $285 in my checking account. Uh-oh. Fortunately, there's an Illinois State Lotto drawing tonight, so I don't need worry too much.

10 on Tuesday

10 Things Cynthia Lennon Whines About

To the uninitiated, Cynthia Powell Lennon Bassanini Twist Charles was the first wife of Beatle John. She wrote the story of their life together and, while I freely admit her story deserves to be told -- after all, of everyone who was intimately involved with the group that would become the Beatles beginning in the 1950s, only she and Sir Paul are left -- her book was so fantastically, fabulously annoying because all she does is whine. And whine. And whine. She is never happy, and she seems to think that many of the "obstacles" she had to overcome were unique to her. This passive-aggressive nit accomplishes the impossible: she makes Yoko seem preferable.

It's 300+ pages covering more than 20 years of Beatle/Lennon history ... and Cynthia's discomfort with the food, the accommodations and the people she encountered along the way. Here's just a snippet:

1) Her first home on her own, a room in a Liverpool boarding house, was old and small and needed a fresh paint job. (I know, the HORROR!)

2) John's Aunt Mimi, who had raised him and was, therefore, her defacto mother in law, didn't think Cynthia was good enough for him. (I know, that never happens)

3) Even though she had passed her twenty-second birthday when she discovered she was pregnant with son Julian, she complains that no one had explained contraception to her. (Apparently there were no libraries, drugstores or doctors' offices in England in the early 1960s; odd because Paul McCartney's biographies recount how very familiar he and the other Beatles were with condoms at that time.*)

4) As per manager Brian Epstein's edict, John and Cynthia "had" to keep their marriage a secret. Apparently Brian convinced John that a Beatle with a wife and a baby was bad for the group's image. This made Cyn sad. (As did most things.) She wanted to be able to shout that she was Mrs. John Lennon!

5) Then, when her identity became known, fans mobbed her! (What did she think they would do?)

6) Some fans said rude things to her. (Shocking.)

7) The fans that didn't say rude things to her cooed over her baby. (I know, I know, the bitches.)

8) After John became famous, many celebrities came to their home for dinner. Yet they didn't really talk much to Cynthia and never commented on her cooking. (Boo hoo.)

9) Except Mike Nesmith of the Monkees and his wife, Priscilla. When they came for dinner, Priscilla actually sat with Cyn in the kitchen and annoyed her by watching her prepare dinner! (Boo! Hiss!)

10) After John left her, none of the Beatles, Beatles wives or Beatle employees would have anything to do with her. Except Paul. Who defied John and came over one day with a rose for Cyn and a song he'd composed for Julian, "Hey, Jules, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better ..." Sound familiar? Isn't it a sweet story? NO, IT'S NOT! Not really! For while John was divorcing Cyn, he was distancing himself from Paul, and Cyn suspects coming to see her was just Paul's way of showing John he was his own man.


* As the story goes, he tacked some condoms onto a dressing room wall in Hamburg and lit them with a match to protest George's deportation for being under age. This stunt got Paul sent back to Liverpool as well. Hey, he was not yet 20. Boys do dumb ass things -- even boys who grow up to be knighted.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 9 :: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted
I have a completely adorable friend who I haven't heard from in a year. And shame on me! For a guy who is such a guy (100% Oscar without a touch a Felix), he is so sweet and thoughtful. His birthday is coming up and I am going to celebrate it with a card and a call/email. So help me God.

ABC Meme

Boosted from Kwizgiver --because she shares!

A – Age: 52 years

B – Bed size: Full

C – Chore you hate: All of them. I am staggeringly lazy.

D – Dog’s name: I never had a dog of my own, though the woman next door let me play with hers -- a little yellow ball of fluff named Sparky. He was very dear.

E – Essential start your day item: Coke

F – Favorite color: Cubby blue. ("Eamus catuli" is latin for "Let's Go, Cubs!")

G – Gold or Silver: Silver

H – Height: 5’2"

I – Instruments you play: None

J – Job title: Associate Creative Director

K – Kid(s): none of my own

L – Living arrangements: Two br condo

M – Mom’s name: Trina

N – Nicknames: My grandpa called me "Ish Kabibble Boo."

O – Overnight hospital stay other than birth: Uterine fibroid embolization

P – Pet Peeve(s): People who take up an extra seat on the train for their backpacks and briefcases. Unless your backpack or briefcase bought a fare, it shouldn't get it's own seat.

Q – Quote from a movie: "I'm talking Julie Andrews twirling around like a mental patient on a mountaintop kind of happy." The Sixth Sense

R – Right or Left handed: right

S – Siblings: one older sister, one younger

T – Time you wake up: well, my alarm goes off at 6:00, and I lay there and watch the local news for a half hour

U -Underwear: White cotton granny panties

V – Vegetable you dislike: Tomatoes

W – Ways you run late: I distract myself with things completely unrelated to getting ready for work

X – X-rays you’ve had: Shoulder and dental and mammograms

Y – Yummy food you make: I only have one recipe: apple banana cake

Z- Zodiac Sign: Sagittarius.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 8 :: Someone who made your life like hell, or treated you like shit When I was in high school, one of my relatives molested me. Since he was newly widowed and "depressed," my mother actually encouraged me to have dinner with him one Sunday. Soon he had his hand between my breasts and his tongue in my ear. I insisted he take me home, but I initially didn't tell anyone. My mother was so distraught over his wife's death that I was afraid she couldn't handle it. This emboldened him, and every time we were in the same room he spoke dirty to me. His perverse game continued for more than 2 decades, when I was 38. During a family gathering -- with my toddler niece, my mom and my grandmother right there -- he leaned in and asked me how I masturbated. He knew I wouldn't make a scene and he got off on it.

A switch inside me was flipped that night. I vowed he would never speak to me that way again, and I haven't allowed it to happen. My mom and my sisters now know what he did to me. It isn't so much that they don't believe me as that they wish I'd just get over it already. It was so much easier before, when I just went along and kept the peace.

He's very old now. I wish he'd just die and get it over with, because I often wonder how I'm going to handle his funeral. A pillar of the church, many of the out-of-town cousins think he's aces, a patriarch worthy of respect, and will undoubtedly wonder why I'm not at his wake/funeral. I have too much respect for death and God to pretend a grief I won't feel, I don't know that I feel like covering for him, and I don't have the stomach to dredge it all up and explain to the cousins.

And it pisses me off that I suffer all this agita over something that never was my fault.

Gee, this was cheery, wasn't it?

Movie Monday -- Hated It

Share on the worst movie you've ever seen, linking back here at The Bumbles. And don't forget to visit your fellow participants!

There are some bad movies I luxuriate in, the way others slide into a warm bath. Have you ever seen Valley of the Dolls? Attack of the Puppet People? There's a genius to how awful-yet-watchable these films are.

Then there are the movies that just suck. They have no entertainment value whatsoever. Here are two. Never watch these movies. Save yourself.

Love Happens. Aren't love stories touching? Isn't Jennifer Aniston adorable? Isn't Aaron Eckhart handsome? Isn't Martin your favorite Sheen? How bad could a love story starring these three be? Oh. My. God. You have no idea how bad. 109 minutes of my life I'll never get back.

City Heat. It stars Clint Eastwood and Burt Reynolds, with Jane Alexander and Rip Torn in supporting roles. So you can expect it to be high quality and campy fun, right? WRONG. It's beyond bad, it's insultingly stupid. Too dull to watch, too many car crashes and shoot outs to sleep through. AVOID AT ALL COSTS.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 7 :: Someone who has made your life worth living for. Jesus. This life is my gift and testament to Him. I am imperfect -- too often selfish and lazy -- but I really do try to be the woman He believes I can be.

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: The 14 Question Meme

Cheers to all of us thieves!

1. What do you consider your hometown to be? Chicago

2. What’s the hardest part of your average day? Getting there, wherever "there" happens to be. I find it hard to leave for work at a reasonable time, or once I'm there it's hard to put my pencil down and come home, or haul my fat ass to the health club.

3. The easiest? Why? Feeding the felines. Tending to them always makes me happy. My cats were all shelter rescues, and I'm so pleased to know that they went from being stray or abandoned to enjoying mealtimes in my kitchen.

4. What beverage do you reach for to quench your thirst? Coke.

5. What is one not-so-secret goal you have for your life? I’ll let you keep your secret ones to yourself. Getting -- and staying! -- organized here at home.I made a serious attempt over the summer and made real headway, but now I'm overrun with paper again.

6. What physical pain do you fear most? For example, I’m trying to decide how bad my jaw pain needs to get before I risk a potential needle from my dentist. So, for me, throbbing is preferable to jabbing. Migraines! They are brutal, I literally cannot move without pain so excruciating that I'm nauseous. And have you ever tried to vomit without moving? If I don't take my football-shaped prescription Naproxen at the very first sign of pain, I'm resigned to first hours of misery and then the hours of sleep required for healing and then I've sacrificed a day to a freaking headache.

7. Where do you find solace? I find that little happens in life that can't be made better by listening to the Beatles or watching Cubs baseball.

8. What makes you the saddest when you read/see the news? Senseless violence. Some stories really get under my skin. One was Nailah Franklin, the young woman whose family and friends were mobilized and passionate, trying to enlist the entire city in the search to save her. It was too awful when, days later, her body was found. Another was Blair Holt, the honor student who lost his life on the way home from school when he pushed a classmate out of the line of gangbanger fire. When I develop my globes for Mimi's Blogblast for Peace, it's not Afghanistan or Iraq or Darfur that I'm thinking of. I dream of my hometown, the day when there will be no more victims like Nailah Franklin and Blair Holt.

9. What do you eat for a favorite snack? Apple slices. Plain, or with cinnamon, or caramel or cheese, if you don't mind.

10. What movie could you/would you watch more than two or three times and still enjoy just as much as the first time? The Way We Were. I love how at the beginning of the movie, Hubbell is the gorgeous golden boy "for whom everything comes too easily," and Katie is all unfashionably sharp elbows and passion. He allows himself to give up what was truly important to him in order to keep his life easy, comfortable and neutral. By the end of the movie, while Hubbell is subdued and just kinda pale, she is still vibrant, still enthusiastic, still fighting for what she believes in. To thine own self be true! Of course, some day I'd like to see a movie where the heroine manages to maintain her individuality and get the gorgeous guy.

11. What boy/girl first made you cry? I truly don't remember. I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing.

12. What brand of coffee/tea do you drink most often? I hate, loathe, despise and abominate coffee. The brand of tea in my kitchen right now is Bigelow.

13. Dig in the dirt with or without garden gloves? I don't have a garden.

14. James Taylor or Carly Simon? Why must I choose?

30 Days of Honesty

Day 6 :: Something you hope you will never have to do When I was younger, the answer to this would have been "food service" because I don't have the temperament to be a waitress and I'm sure I'd be miserable. But now, my response is more serious. I hope I never have to take care of my mother. She values her independence, and I value mine. But as she gets older and has an increasingly difficult time remembering things and making decisions, this is where I fear we're headed. This is, of course, one of those times I'd love to be wrong.

Saturday 9

This is my favorite Lennon song.

Saturday 9: Watching the Wheels

1. What do you see when you are watching the wheels go round? The world moving on around me. For me, the key lyric is, "No longer riding on the merry go round, I just had to let it go." Meaning that when confronted with a situation where I can't control the outcome, I just have to let go. (OK, for you regular readers of this blog, let me rephrase: I have to TRY to just let go.)

2. Do you watch reality shows? Which ones? Lately I have been watching this little show on A&E -- Teach. Sitcom star Tony Danza goes back to school to teach 10th grade English. It's fascinating. Some of the kids (Monte, I love you!) are exceptional students, dying for a greater challenge and eager to learn more. Others are struggling with Of Mice and Men and To Kill a Mockingbird -- really struggling. How does a teacher handle the challenge of engaging the entire class when it's made of individuals like this? I never thought about how hard teaching must be. (I wouldn't have known this show existed if not for Comcast On Demand; if you're interested, you can find it there.)

3. What's your favorite all time reality show? The Real World. Remember the San Francisco season with Pedro, Judd and Pam, Rachel, Cory, Mo and Puck? My favorite cast.

4. Do you feel "reality" shows are real or are they faked? Oh, I don't know. Certainly Jersey Shore looks about as real as a $3 bill. But I'd like to think the kids on Teach were being themselves. So I guess the answer is, "it depends."

5. What does your personal neon sign say to the world? Cub Fan

6. Ever seen a neon sign with certain letters burned out so that it said something unintended? Not that I can recall. Sorry.

7. What gives you a headache? Could be a scent, a sound, someone's actions - anything. Mike's Hard Lemonade can trigger an awful migraine. My doctor says it's the artificial lemon flavoring. Too bad. I miss it on hot summer days.

8. What song, artist or album in your music collection would you pull out and play if you wanted to give your roommate/neighbors a huge, head-splitting headache? Barry Manilow's Greatest Hits. Apparently it's been proven to clear out public parks in Sydney, Australia.

9. What do you do to relieve stress? Work out, play Pogo, or Xanax.

30 Days of Honesty -- Playing Catch Up Again

I didn't post this yesterday because I didn't want to take away from yesterday's peaceful Blogblast. But today I'm honestly trying to come up to date on this challenge:

Day 4 :: Something you have to forgive someone for. There are those who feel it's time for me to let Steve Bartman off the hook, but the furthest I'm willing to go is to stop calling him "Fucking Steve Bartman." Instead I think it would be better for me to forgive Crazy Old Neighbor once and for all. He continues to take up too much space in my head. This is going to be a long process, though, since neither prayer nor therapy seems to have brought me closer.

Day 5 :: Something you hope to do in your life. Remember how Wilbur eulogized Charlotte? "It is not often that someone comes along who is a true friend and a good writer. Charlotte was both." If someone can say that of me some day, I will have enjoyed a life well lived.

Dona Nobis Pacem

THIS JUST IN ...

"Some men see things as they are and say why -
I dream things that never were and say why not."

Help us make news.
Dream with us. Celebrate with us.
Join us.
Blogblast for Peace -- 11/4/2010

30 Days of Honesty -- Playing Catch Up

I was turned on to this meme by Snarkela. Since I began this blog as a snapshot, an honest chronicle of who I am at this moment, it seems like a good idea.

Since today is November 3, I'm going to answer 3 of the questions now so I can face tomorrow, all caught up.

30 Days of Honesty

Day 1 :: Something you hate about yourself. Laziness. Sloth. I think it's a manifestation of my immaturity, because if a task or topic truly interests me, I can hold it in my teeth like a terrier with a sock and shake it until it's exhausted. But if I'm not motivated, I can just sit on the sofa, doing nothing, filling myself with self loathing.

Day 2 :: Something you love about yourself. I am hopeful. Maybe not about the resolution of a given situation, I can be rather hopeless about some things. But about life itself. I know every day is full of little joys and miracles and I'm fortunate that, no matter how bad my day is, little things like the soft feel of a feline ear or a favorite Motown song on the Oldies Station always somehow find their way to my heart.

Day 3 :: Something you have to forgive yourself for. I stayed in a bad relationship with the wrong man for entirely too long. He did unspeakable things to me and I allowed him to. Because I had confused drama with love, I even baited him into our ugly battles at times. This relationship left me with both physical and emotional scars. I have own the fact that I allowed it -- that I valued myself so cheaply -- so that I never let it happen again. And then I have to forgive myself.

Trying to set the reset button

I took today off as a mental health day.

I slept in (past 8:00 AM!) and did two loads of laundry in my own laundry room (first time since September!). It was good to be able to bleach my undies again.

Took a nap and ordered myself barbecue ribs and followed Illinois' complicated gubernatorial election.

I feel better, but I still have this sense of dread -- mostly about my mother's mental acuity and my oldest friend's recent relocation to California. My mom is frighteningly, progressively more willful and forgetful these days and my friend's freshman-aged daughter is, I fear, on the verge of making some serious mistakes at her new high school. The girl is going from a conservative suburb in Illinois' DuPage Co. to Beverly Hills High. I'm not sure that posts that say, "Itz Halloween motherfuckers" and "u r a fag but my fag" and references to suicide are the way to represent her to her new classmates, or my friend to the mothers of her new classmates.

I worry. I worry. I worry. But I'm trying to let go what I can't change and just move on. And I do feel better today. Maybe blissful, uninterrupted sleep really is what I needed.

I Want Wednesday

I want to win my battle with worry.

In my way, I'll miss Christine O'Donnell

Self Portrait

Sometimes I feel like this is how the people in my life view me -- as hot and cold running Gal. Always there when you need me, but completely out of mind when you don't. In short, taken for granted.

If you believe in the power of words ...

Why not create your own post the BlogBlast for Peace (November 4)?

You can trust me, because I'm a BlogBlast for Peace Veteran. Imagining a more peaceful world is wonderful for your soul!

10 on Tuesday

I feel the blues encroaching but I'm not giving in without a fight. Here are 10 reliable things that can/will make me happy today.

1) Clear, blue skies above

2) Voting

3) Knowing that my niece was up early and at the polls before 7:00 this morning because she volunteered to work as a judge

4) Having a project on my plate that requires some creativity/flexibility

5) Nanowrimo gives me an opportunity for even more creativity/flexibilitiy

6) Watching my cat Joey power nap (he looks so damn sweet when he sleeps, which only stands to reason because he's such a dear, gentle soul)

7) Chiquita Apple Bites make it easy for even the laziest person (me) to snack healthy

8) My MLB Cubs checks, that make me smile a bit as I pay my bills

9) Knowing I can listen to the Beatles anytime I want to (and will!)

10) My TBR pile -- sometimes I find it daunting but right now I find a neverending supply of books comforting

Movie Monday -- Boozing

Share movies that feature characters that not only imbibe, but get wasted. Please link back here to The Bumbles.

Arthur. When this movie came out in 1981, I was completely charmed. Dudley Moore played the world's most adorable drunk, a millionaire who never had to deal with the downside to his behavior (except, as his loyal and riotously funny butler liked to point out, his breath). Watch it now and it's more than a little shocking. His alcoholism is nothing more than an endearing character flaw, and his drunk driving is played for laughs. Today it's still funny, but it's also a powerful reminder of how much our attitude toward drinking has changed since the 1980s.

The Verdict. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Paul Newman is the coolest guy ever. Hip, funny and filled with effortless charm. Which is why his performance in The Verdict is so jarring and effective. His Frank Galvin is washed up, having drunk his career away, reduced to perpetually sweaty palms and ambulance chasing. There's still a majesty and romance to him when he remembers why he became a lawyer, and when he stumbles upon a medical malpractice case that touches something deep in him, he sees the courtroom as his venue for redemption.