Thirteen Reasons why
THE GAL HERSELF
would willingly trade places with her cats
I wouldn’t want to be just any cat. (I realize that there are countless cats suffering or at risk, and if I could, I would bring them all indoors to my home.) But I look at my cats and at times I feel tremendous envy.
Naturally my cats are the most attractive, intelligent and fascinating feline trio ever! (Just ask them.) And their lives are pretty cushy. Here’s how I imagine my life is I switched places with them …
1. Instead of leaving for work, at 8:30, I’d be doing whatever I pleased. I might be chasing a ball with a bell inside (like Rey) or indulging in a little after-breakfast grooming (like Charlotte) or finding the perfect spot in the sun for my morning nap (like Joey).
2. I’d eat better. They have premium cat food I buy directly from the vet; I eat McDonald’s.
3. The phone, the buzzer and the alarm clock would never have anything to do with me.
4. I could leap to the top of the refrigerator or the armoire.
5. My life would be more exciting and glamorous. When I look at a twist tie, I wouldn’t see a twist tie, I’d see a dangerous snake that must be pounced upon and vanquished! A shirt box would be a luxurious four-poster bed. A paper shopping bag would be a cave.
6. I’d be more patient and content, able to sit perfectly still as I stare at my human and telepathically try to convince her to share the milk from her breakfast cereal, and I’d be perfectly happy at the window, spending long moments just watching leaves blow by.
7. I’d have a tail.
8. I could nap anywhere – along the back of the sofa, on the windowsill, under the bed … sometimes even on the bed.
9. Cat nip!
10. With my exceptional night vision, my schedule wouldn’t depend upon mundane things like the clock, or sunrise/sunset.
11. There’s a confidence that comes with knowing you’re descended from Egyptian gods.
12. I could mess with my human by suddenly turning my head and staring at the front door. (Ha! Made her look!)
13. Wouldn’t know or care about Iraq, or Afghanistan, or the crisis in health care or even the tragedy of homeless dogs and cats. After all, to me, the cable box would just be a warm place to perch, and Chicago Tribune something to nest upon.
Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
1. Rashenbo's important TT about literacy is at writingaspirations.blogspot.com
2. Tink shares 13 things she does on her computer at tinkerbell-nl.blogspot.com
3. Jade recommends 13 addictive TV shows at jadesymb.livejournal.com
4. I sighed while reading Thomma Lyn's TT at thommalyn.blogspot.com
5. Go to thiseclecticlife.com for a TT that's so on-target it's scary!
6. Susan's highly imaginative Kerri/Mitchell TT is at westofmars.blogspot.com
7. Take a TT trip to beautiful, sunny Cuba (& visit one gi-normous snake!) at mommybrainvictim.wordpress.com
8. Jamie's funny, yet painful, TT is at jdurward.blogspot.com
9. Jenny McB's bloody brilliant -- and blood-related -- TT is at jennymcb.blogspot.com
10. Janet's fun and imaginative things that begin with k are at www.fondofsnape.com
11. Kathy's generous TT birthday wishlist is at kathmandupa.blogspot.com
12. For 13 things you didn't know about Bermuda, go to wyliekinson.blogspot.com
13. L^2's more or less musical TT is at l-squared.blogspot.com (she's right about "Kokomo")
14. Dewey's TT TBR list is at deweymonster.com 15. Qtpies7's multi-media TT about Scrubs is at qtpies7.blogspot.com 16. Gabriella's TT is trip down memory lane to grad school at www.gabriellahewitt.com 17. She's TT is devoted to (shudder!) Karaoke. I'm tone deaf and will not sing in public, but if I did, I'd borrow from her set list at daemon-ink.net/blog 18. Crazy Working Mom's "mature" TT is at tishblack.blogspot.com 19. Teamouse's 13 big oops's is at teatimeramblings.blogspot.com/ 20. Starla's horrifically funny TT is at themonkeycrew.typepad.com/beside_the_pointe/2007/04/thursday_thirte_3.html 21. Frigga denies saying EVER any of the things in her TT at anyapples.blogspot.com
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