So that I'll have sweet dreams

Yes, I start a new workweek tomorrow. And above all, I'll be waiting for a most important call from my doctor. To make sure that I sleep well and wake up happy, my final post will be a reflection on

THE FIRST PLACE CHICAGO CUBS!

My Boys in Blue swept Dusty Baker's* Reds and now find themselves 1/2 game ahead of the Cards. Which is, of course, as it should be.


*Dusty Baker was the manager who allowed the trade of my beloved future Hall of Famer Greg Maddux for Cesar Isturis. Cesar Who, you say? My point exactly.

Memo to Politicians: If you want your kids to be left alone ...

... Don't send them out on an "abstinence speaking tour" and/or encourage them to pose on the cover of People. In her final speech as Alaska's governor Sarah Palin admonished the press to leave her successor's kids alone.

This broad gives me a headache. Less than two months ago, her eldest daughter Bristol appeared solo (I mean, without her parents) on the cover of People magazine. This is no paparazzi shot. This teen mom posed for it. As People announced regarding its exclusive: "Breast-Feeding Before Classes, Staying in on Prom Night—the Alaska Teenager Graduates from High School and Talks Frankly About the Highs and Lows of Her New '24-Hour-a-Day Job'." It was also during early summer 2009 that Bristol appeared on morning talk shows to discuss teen motherhood.

Even the Blagojevichs haven't promoted their kids' public profiles this way. Sure, Patti ate a tarantula on I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here, but the girls remain off limits. You know you have hit bottom when you make the Blago clan look smart and classy.

I'm sick of Sarah Palin being a professional victim. She actively puts her kids out there, right alongside Jon & Kate, and then whines about the attention. I hope she just goes away. Or gets a talk show on Fox. At least then she'll be contained and easier to avoid.

8 Tubes of Mascara

That's what I just threw out. I have no idea how long I've had some of them, which is dangerous when it comes to something I wear so close to my eyes. That's not why I did it, though. I got tired of wasting time every morning, opening a tube and finding it was dried up or otherwise unusable. Finally I figured the best way to solve this problem was to sit down, go through them, and actually DISCARD the old, dried up or empty mascaras.

Yes, you may alert Mensa now.

Now I'm moving on to the eye shadows.