I asked a thirtysomething coworker to please not use that phrase when she was being derogatory. She got all defensive and said that she has "plenty of gay friends" and "it doesn't mean that." Meaning it she's not implying that something bad is something "homosexual." I said that "gay" either means "homosexual" or "happy" and her comment meant neither. She told me that "times change," meaning I'm an out of it, oversensitive old fart, but she'll try not to use it in front of me again.
Am I just an out of it, oversensitive old fart?
These are the thoughts and observations of me — a woman of a certain age. (Oh, my, God, I'm 65!) I'm single. I'm successful enough (independent, self supporting). I live just outside Chicago, the best city in the world. I'm an aunt and a friend. I feel that voices like mine are rather underrepresented online or in print. So here I am. If my musings resonate with you, please visit my blog again sometime.
you are not an old fart....she is just stupid.
ReplyDeletewe ALL know what it means and so does she.
I work hard at school to get the kids to stop saying that. You aren't out of touch, she is insensitive. We are working on a campaign "it's not ok to say that's gay" and coming up with alternative words/phrases to use.
ReplyDeletePS--isn't she a bit old to use that kind of slanguage??
ReplyDeleteI have used it that way in the past and had to work hard to stop myself from saying it. You're not an old fart.
ReplyDeleteShe knows better and so do I which is why I stopped it. It was just a habit but one of which I wasn't proud.
Glad you called her on it. (I do much of my own self policing and if I don't, my angels nudge me. heh Sometimes it's more like a shove. I can be stubborn.)
A few years ago I was friends with a guy I met on a message board for a local radio station who happened to be gay. He really disliked it when someone called something gay.
ReplyDeleteAfter that, I made it a point not to use that expression.
It's also like using the word "retarded". I HATE that word and I cringe whenever I hear someone use it as slang (and really, if they are trying to use it correctly as it's no longer p.c.)
She may be "out of it" since I thought that slang went out of style back in the 80's. But, oh well.
ReplyDeleteI always assumed it came about from the older expression that something odd or strange was queer and modern kids adapted it to the word gay since queer became slang for homosexual.
I hardly ever hear either terms used anymore and if I do it's generally from people of my generation in the 80's who grew up with it as a run of the mill expression for something stupid or annoying or silly. I don't think they meant that homosexuals were any of those things. But I certainly see how it could be interpreted that way now, and that it would considered insensitive.