I hate this so much.

For his birthday, John and I were going to the Cub game on Saturday, July 13. Now we aren’t. He’s still too ill, still too weak, and afraid that he’ll become woozy in the crush of 40,000 fans. He no longer likes to travel far from home and is skipping all Chicago’s summer street fairs. This news makes me sad, because it’s so not John.

He is battling heart failure, and it has diminished him. John was once on the cutting edge. He was the one who was bored with the latest trend before I even heard about it. He was out every weekend. He was the charismatic one, always making new friends from different generations, different walks of life. He was curious about everything.

That's not who he is anymore. 

•  Technology makes him angry. He doesn't do Facebook or Twitter -- which isn't a good thing for an advertising copywriter whose clients use social media.

•  He hates Uber and Lyft because they mean fewer cabs on the street ... and his phone won't accept apps. 

•  He needs glasses but he won't wear them. At dinner, he'll ask the waitress if they serve what he wants, rather than looking at the menu. At museums, he stares at the exhibit for a moment but doesn't read the cards ... because he can't see them.

*  He doesn't get his hair cut anymore. He wears it pulled back into a little gray ponytail.  

•  He can't move. I am, literally, a foot shorter than he is. I'm fat and out of shape. And John can't keep up with me when we walk up the street.

•  He complains about new people. For silly things, like one of his neighbors has a dog. And he hates crowds.

His doctors wanted him to get a pacemaker in 2009, but he refused then. A decade later and they're not talking about it anymore. His new cardiologist put him on Entresto, and hopes that will enhance his heart's ability to pump blood without any device implementation. 

I'm afraid that 13 years of battling heart disease has made him old. I'm afraid he's running out of time. I'm afraid I'm watching my friend die.

He is 64. I am not ready to say goodbye to him.

Sunday Stealing

"HAPPY QUESTIONS"

1. Are you a happy person? More often than not.


2. What is happiness for you? Happiness is in the moment. The way my cat Reynaldo curls his paws, or watching Anthony Rizzo swing for the fences, or eating Raisinettes in the dark from a movie seat.


3. What do you think is the color of happiness? Pantone 294, aka Cubbie blue.

4. Can money buy happiness? Money can buy freedom from worrying about money.


5. Is happiness a state of mind? That's a little superficial. Some people struggle with depression, and which is real and serious and not something they can choose their way out of.



6. What are three things that make you happy? Books and cats and the Cubs.


7. Does having a pet make you happy? Definitely!


8. When was the happiest time of your childhood? This is a particularly fond memory: When I was 7, my parents surprised me by taking me and my oldest friend to see the Beatles' HELP! at a drive-in. I was riding my bike and the three of them pulled up in an unfamiliar car, a blue station wagon. My dad had swapped cars with a coworker so we could have the back of the wagon to bounce around in when we screamed and cried over The Lads. It was an uncharacteristically thoughtful gesture on my dad's part.



9. Can you be happy if you are rich? Of course.

 
10. Do you think happiness lies within you or does it depend on other people and external things? Yes. I mean, your happiness is ultimately your own responsibility. But it's ridiculous to ignore all the outside factors that influence us and our well being every day.
 
11. Are single people happy? No. Every day it's a battle not to take my own miserable, single life. I apologize for breathing and using air better used by married people.

 
12, What is the effect that animals/pets have on people to make them feel happy? As I answer these questions, my cat Connie is in my lap, so let's use her as an example. First of all, I love how affectionate she is. Her purr is audible and every now and again she rubs her head up against my arm. Second, I love how clear and bright her eyes are. When I first brought her home, she had an infection that left her with a perpetually runny nose and cloudy, light sensitive eyes. It brings me joy to see how healthy she now is. And sometimes she's very funny. The mesh bag that I once used for washing my lingerie is in the middle of the kitchen. Connie somehow decided it is her mortal enemy. She battles it and then proudly parades around with it. Thank God she's keeping me safe from that mesh bag!

 
13.  Can you be happy if you are poor? I don't think so, because I would be worried about paying my bills.

 
14.  What is there to be happy about in today’s world? We live in America, where we still have a free press. That should inspire joy, especially on Sunday morning when we have both the Sunday papers and long-format shows like Meet the Press, Face the Nation and This Week to inform us.

15.  How happy are you compared with your friends. "Compare and despair." Words of wisdom to live by. Happiness is not a sport.

A movie about TV

The Cub game wasn't going well. I didn't feel like doing housework. So Saturday afternoon I ran to the movies. I'm very glad I did.

Imagine if Johnny Carson had been a British woman. Talented, witty, excellent. A little soulless, a little out of step. On top too long, slipping and in danger of being replaced.

To add diversity and relevance to her staff, she hires a young Indian woman. She means the young woman to be a mere token, but the new writer turns out to be much more than that.

Mindy Kaling wrote and costars in this workplace comedy. Her character is impressively imperfect, and therefore likeable and relatable.

Emma Thompson is amazing. I do believe she can do anything. I loved her in Dead Again. I loved her in Love, Actually. I even loved her as Nanny G on Cheers. She's like Meryl Streep, only with a little less technique on display.

Is this a great movie? No. Is it an entertaining way to spend an afternoon? Absolutely.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Venus in Blue Jeans (1962)

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

1) Like the dream girl described in this song, Sam is wearing jeans as she composes this Saturday 9. Is there a lot of denim in your wardrobe? It's my go-to. Every day.

2) Jimmy Clanton likens this girl to the Venus de Milo, the ancient Greek sculpture made of marble and now on display at the Louvre. Is there any marble in your home? Not even aggies or cat's eyes.

3) He refers to his girl as "Mona Lisa with a pony tail." The Mona Lisa is also at the Louvre. What's the last museum you visited? I began Christmas Day with a visit to the Key West Butterfly and Nature Conservatory. Does that count? 

4) This girl is so awesome, she's the 8th Wonder of the World! Without looking it up, could you name the other 7? Nope

5) Jimmy Clanton spent his entire professional life behind a microphone. After he quit selling records, he began spinning them as a DJ. Do you consider the sound of your voice one of your better qualities? No. I hate my voice.

6) At age 80, Mr. Clanton still performs. He averaged an appearance/month in 2018. Some of his fans were surprised that he has let his pompadour go completely white. Do you color your hair? No. (My stylist colors it for me.)

7) In 1962, when this song was popular, Americans were reading about 5-year-old First Daughter, Caroline Kennedy, and her pony, Macaroni. Tell us about a pet you had when you were very young. Tommy. He was a wonderful cat. Mostly white, with one black ear and a black tail. We were great pals. We went everywhere together.

When I was about 5 myself (like Caroline), Tommy got sick right before Christmas. The vet called, and told my mom he had chronic kidney disease, would never be well, and she should consider putting him down.

My mom was a very mild-mannered woman, but I still remember her yelling into the phone. "Give me some pills or something. Tommy is coming home for Christmas!" She just couldn't bear to ruin my Christmas by telling me Tommy was gone forever. 

Well, Mom and Tommy and I showed him! Tommy lived another 14 years.

8) Decades later, Caroline Kennedy was the first woman to serve as US Ambassador to Japan. Have you ever been to Asia? Nope

9) Random question: When talking among themselves, who do you think is more open and honest about sex -- men or women? Women.

-->

That felt gooood

Tonight I gabbed on the phone with my oldest friend, and we laughed ... and laughed. About silly things. It felt good.

I've been feeling isolated lately. By worry and hurt. John ... Henry and Reg ... Book Mama ... things are hitting me harder and staying with me longer these days. I can't shake the blues.

Instead of marinating in my unhappiness, I reached out. I'm so glad I did. Getting her advice about Henry and Reg made me feel better, and the laughter lifted the veil a bit.

For Book Mama

One of my first ever blogging buddies was Book Mama. I don't know how she found these musings, but she became a regular reader/commenter here and I started following her adventures. She was such a warm, funny woman. So passionate about so many things! She embodied "midwestern nice" at its best.

She's the only blogging buddy I've ever met in real life. When she, her mom ("Snowbird") and  kids visited Chicago, we all had lunch together in the cafeteria of my office building. They were just as authentic and comfortable as I'd hoped they'd be. Whenever I pass the table by the window where we all sat, I think of that day and smile.

Today I received an IM from Book Mama's mama and she shared the devastating news. "We lost her." This woman, this mother, this wife and daughter died from a sudden brain aneurysm. She was only in her 40s.

 I post these roses in memory of a woman who:

•  Was so proud of all her children, and just saw her oldest learn to drive and graduate from high school. That poor young man, going into this new chapter of his life without her.

•  Encouraged her girls to follow their hearts and interests. When one of her daughters became Hamilton obsessed, Book Mama not only brought her to Chicago to see the show, she waited at the stage door so she could take her girl's picture with her favorite Schuyler Sister.

•  After decades together was still romantically in love with her husband. As a barren spinster, I so enjoyed hearing that!

•  Had a conscience. She was committed to things, from car seat safety to the choir to Postcards for Voters.

•  Was enthusiastic! Whether it was her planning her summer reads or applying the Konmari method to her home, Book Mama threw herself into what she doing today and was looking forward to tomorrow.

My heart will miss her heart. When she brought her girls downtown for Hamilton, she asked me where she could find Napoleon and his people. She wanted her children to have a face, and a story, to help them better understand homelessness. And she had a $20 tucked away to share with Napoleon, Caleb and Randi. Because that's who she was.

Rose photo courtesy of Pixomar at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Sunday Stealing

FACEBOOK QUESTIONS

  WHAT WAS YOUR:

    Last beverage: I swallowed my morning meds with skimmed milk

    Last phone call: Kathleen. I'm doing a freelance job for her. 

    Last text message: My nephew, rhapsodizing about Anthony Rizzo. The Cubs played the Dodgers last night in Los Angeles, and Rizz gave us our Hollywood ending: a game-winning homer in the 9th.

    Last song you listened to: "Let's Groove" by Earth, Wind and Fire

    Last time you cried: Watching the end of Butch Cassidy & The Sundance Kid about three weeks ago. I've seen that movie at least 25 times -- I can recite it! --  and never cried before. I realize these were really tears shed for my old boss, who'd just died. I admired that man so much.

HAVE YOU EVER:.

    Been cheated on: Yes
    Kissed someone and regretted it: Yes
    Lost someone special: Yes
    Been depressed: Yes
    Drunk hard liquor: Yes
    Lost glasses/contacts: Yes

RANDOM

    Last time you saw your mother: She was in the hospital, delusional and angry. I don't like thinking about it.
    Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yes
    Most visited Webpages: Email, Facebook, this blog, Goodreads and Farmville

    Will you be celebrating Fathers day? Nope. My dad, grandfather and godfather are all gone.
    When did you first realize you were an adult? When I was setting up the kitchen of my first-ever apartment. This place was mine. All the decisions were mine. It was exhilarating and scary. I was 19.

 
   

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: I Learned from You (2007) ... Because it's Father's Day weekend. 

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

 
1) This song is a duet by the father/daughter team, Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus. Is your family musically inclined? Not remotely! I don't play an instrument, and neither did my parents nor either of my sisters.

 
2) This song is about life lessons. Who has been a major influence on your life? Cousin Rose. Our relationship is different now than it was when I was 16 and she was 25, and her influence has naturally waned. But when I was a girl and a young teen, she was a wonderful role model and my biggest supporter.

 
3) Miley's given name is "Destiny." Her nickname as a baby was "Smiley," which is where Miley came from. What's something that can always be depended upon to make you smile? Not a "what" but a "who." My favorite most Cub, Anthony Rizzo. On and off the field, his work ethic and joie de vivre delight me. Not only did he recently get his 500th homerun, last month, he raised $1.8 million with his annual Cook Off for Cancer. He played host and emcee, while his teammates either acted as grillmasters or waiters. All the proceeds go to the battle against pediatric cancer. Oh yeah, and he made it to TMZ! The story was really no big deal, but it amuses me that Rizz haunting McDonald's in the pre-dawn hours is a national story.

Anthony @ the 2018 Cook Off. Since his wedding in December, he's more likely to wear a jacket at off-the-field appearances. My boy is growing up! (Photo from The Chicago Tribune)

4) Miley's father, country singer Billy Ray Cyrus, has 5 children in addition to Miley (6 in all). Are you the oldest, the middle or the youngest sibling? Or are you an only child? I'm a middle child. My older sister is a year ahead of me, my kid sister is 8 years behind me. When I asked my mom if we were planned, she just laughed and said "no sane person" would space her kids that way.

 
5) Sam's own father often traveled for business, and always remembered to bring her the little complimentary soaps, shampoos or body lotion he got from the hotel. Tell us about an inexpensive but treasured souvenir from a trip you've taken. My little pins from this year's TCM Classic Film Festival.

6) Back when Sam was in high school, it was her father who gave her driving lessons. Are you patient when teaching someone something new? I try to be. I don't know that I'm altogether successful.

 
7) Sam's father is easy to buy for: every year he wants a new pair of loafers, so every year for Father's Day she gives him a DSW gift card. Is there anyone on your gift list that you find it easy to buy for? My oldest friend. First of all, she needs everything. Plus, she has a great many passions: cats, Star Trek, The Godfather, The Beatles ...

 
8) For family barbecues, Sam's dad dons his "Kiss the Chef" apron and mans the Weber. What's the last thing you cooked on the grill? A salmon filet on my little George Foreman grill.

 
9) Sam's father satisfies his afternoon sugar craving with an almost endless stream of Butter Rum Lifesavers. When you crave a snack, do you usually reach for something sweet or salty? Depends on the day.

 

Seen while looking out the window

I wasn't going to work out today at lunchtime. I have a good book, I was hungry, I had a few bucks in my wallet ... I thought maybe a slice of gooey pizza, devoured in a booth while enjoying my book, was in order.

I looked out the window to check the weather and saw an old lady with a cane. She looked so vulnerable, trying to make her way toward Michigan Avenue in the crush of people. I decided I never want to be her, and that I should work toward preventing it.

So I stretched and I pedaled. And tonight, when I got home, I iced my back. I have to respect that I have spinal stenosis and behave like a responsible adult when it comes to managing it.

Image courtesy of Sira Anamwong at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I miss romance

No "restless flames" for me or my buds

As I get older, my friends' problems become more health related than romantic. For a worrier like me, this is especially, well, worrisome.

My oldest friend had "an outpatient procedure" related to her bladder. For the last three years, she's suffered from incontinence. Not a few drops when she sneezed or coughed. This was a real problem. Plus she's been struggling with repeat UTIs. So she was glad to have the procedure, even though now she "hurts like hell" and will be walking like John Wayne for a while. I know there's a second step, a second procedure, recommended, but she doesn't seem to want to discuss it. Lately our emails have been frothy affairs, which is fine. She battles depression and if she wants to keep it light, we shall.

My friend John is ill. The good news is that he's being treated at Northwestern, recently ranked one of the top 10 cardiology programs in the nation. The bad news is that he's 63 (64 next month) and has suffered from congenital heart disease for a decade now. Since March, he's taken a turn for the worse. He can't breathe and he tires easily. Also, he continues to lose weight. John says he has no interest in food since being diagnosed as diabetic back in 2016.

The doctors had wanted to implant a pacemaker 10 years ago, when he was first diagnosed. He refused. He expected them to insist on one now, but in 2019, they're not so sure a device is still the right course of treatment for him. He made it through his first round of tests, which resulted in his meds being adjusted. Next up is an angiogram.

He needs to improve his diet ... and incorporate exercise into his day ... and begin taking immunizations for shingles, flu and pneumonia more seriously ... When he was telling me all this, I wanted to scream. FUCK TO THE YES, YOU HAVE TO DO THOSE THINGS! I love him. I can't imagine my life without him. How can he be so cavalier with his life? I am working hard to not let him see how frustrated and frightened I am.

Henry and Reg are exhausting.  Henry, who nearly died last October after a terrible traffic accident, complains that Reg treats him "like a child," wants to keep him dependent, and is more and more impatient and short tempered with each passing day. I can see where all of that could be true. But, with Henry's traumatic brain injury, maybe it's not true. That's the challenge: I have to listen and support him and treat him like an equal, never knowing if what he's saying to me is truth or fantasy.

His husband, Reg, takes to social media to bitch and moan about their lives. According to him, Henry can be unreasonable and temperamental and requires constant attention. Is this accurate? I don't know, but I believe it feels true to Reg. That's not what disturbs me.

It's that he seems to need to use GoFundMe and Facebook to reach a big audience for his two shows a day of martyrdom. I have told Reg, more than once, that when Henry inevitably finds these posts he will consider them a massive betrayal and invasion of his privacy. Reg says, "I don't care. I can't care," meaning he needs this outlet for his stress and pain.

"Read about TBI!" he keeps telling me. You think I haven't?

When I do my Reg-required TBI reading, I see again and again that both the patient and caregiver should be in counseling. Neither of them is. Henry doesn't go because there's nothing wrong with him. He denies he ever had a brain injury. The problem is everyone who treats him "like a child." Reg isn't in counseling because he doesn't "have time."

I know how they each must be struggling. I appreciate how far Henry has come in his recovery, and accept that, if this is our new normal, I will adapt because I love him.

But I do not belong in their marriage. What I am about to say is ugly but it's true: sometimes I dread their calls and messages.

Can you see why I miss the good old days when my late night phone calls centered around, "Why doesn't he looooove me?"

WWW.WEDNESDAY

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

 
1. What are you currently reading?   
A Common Struggle by Patrick J. Kennedy. The Kennedy family maintains a hold on our national imagination in part, I believe, because they are just that -- a family. They are us, only more so. Our strengths and weaknesses are theirs, only theirs are magnified. All of this is on display in Patrick Kennedy's very brave book.

The youngest child of Ted and Joan Kennedy, Patrick had two parents with mental health and addiction issues. Like many families, the Kennedys found these issues embarrassing and painful and would have preferred not to shine a spotlight on them. But the spotlight was always there. In a particularly chilling passage, near the beginning of the book, Patrick describes his early sessions with a shrink. He was a teenager, confused by his parents' divorce, yet afraid to discuss the more painful aspects with his psychiatrist because it felt too private and too embarrassing. Then he walked into a bookstore, browsed the "Kennedy section" and saw that just about anyone had access to tales about his mother's drinking and his father's infidelities.

Mental illness and addiction are "a common struggle" because we all know someone who suffers from depression, addiction, or anxiety. Bi-polar Patrick shares his story, and offers up solutions, to encourage dialog on this important topic. While well written, it's not an easy read because there's real pain on every page. I applaud him for this book.

2. What did you recently finish reading? 

The President Is Missing by Bill Clinton and James Patterson. Part of the fun of this book -- and it is paranoid, scary, wacky fun -- is in stumbling upon similarities between William Jefferson Clinton and fictional POTUS Jonathon Lincoln Duncan. Both grew up poor. Both went to law school and married the smartest girl in class. Both had one, perfect daughter. Both became Southern governors and then ascended to the Presidency. Both felt they unjustly faced impeachment. I smiled a lot as I read those passages.

As an author, Bill Clinton improves this book. He has always been good at taking the complex and making it relatable. (Or, as Barack Obama said in 2012, he should be "Secretary of Explaining Stuff.") Cyber terrorism and hacking are brought to life here in a way that will give you chills. You get what's at stake here. And, after reading this book, you'll be pissed by how sanguine the current (real life) Administration seems in the face of Russian meddling.

I'm sure the plotting was all Patterson, and it was tight. The suspense built to a satisfying reveal that made complete sense. However, there were passages that were unnecessarily lurid and breathless, and they reminded me why I quit reading Patterson/Alex Cross back in the 1990s.

3.  What will you read next?  

Something lighter, that's for sure.

From church this morning

As we move through life, finding ourselves, 
always newly wise and newly foolish,
we ask that our mistakes be small and not hurtful.

Yes, yes, yes!

Sunday Stealing

 

WOULD YOU RATHER?

1. Would you rather be able to detect any lie you hear or get away with any lie you tell? Detect any lie

2. Would you rather be a hopeless romantic or a hopeless unromantic? Hopeless romantic

3. Would you rather have too many friends or too few? Too many

4. Would you rather have no taste buds or be blind? No taste buds

5. Would you rather never hear music again or lose the ability to read? Never hear music

6. Would you rather find true love or be rich? Since I doubt I'll live happily ever after with a man, I'll choose the money

7. Would you rather be the richest person or the smartest? Smartest

8. Would you rather create history or delete it? Create

9. Would you rather create a great piece of art and not get credit or get credit for a piece of art you didn’t create? Create

10. Would you rather age from the neck up, or from the neck down. Neck down

11. Would you rather see the world but live in poverty or stay in one place and live rich? Stay in one place and live rich

12. Would you rather become famous or powerful? Powerful

13. Would you rather be a creative person or a technical person? Creative

14. Would you rather get a paper cut whenever you touch paper or bit your tongue whenever you eat something? Paper cut

15. Would you rather wake up in the morning looking like a giraffe or a kangaroo? Kangaroo

16. Would you rather speak “whale” or read babies’ minds. Read babies' minds

17. Would you rather eat pizza every day or never eat pizza again? Every day!

18 Would you rather stay forever at your current age or be 10 years younger? 10 years younger

 

Happy, happy, happy

My heroes in Cubbie blue have won three in a row, the last two against division rivals The Cardinals. 

The prettiest sight in this fine pretty world is watching Cubs fans celebrate within the Friendly Confines.

See you in September!

In 1922, a group of charity-minded neighborhood women, each representing a different worthy cause, pooled their resources and bought a house. A huge Victorian. They reasoned that they could hold "yard sales" all year around, not just when weather was permitting. Because, let's face it, in Chicagoland it gets cold, it snows and it rains (and rains).

During the Depression, the house meant even more to the community. When money was tight, families that once only came there to donate cast-offs found they needed to shop there, as well. For back-to-school clothes, for the flatware a bride needed for her first kitchen, for books and magazines, for fabric and sewing materials, etc.

Now it's beloved not only as a fundraiser, but as the ultimate example of recycling. The items that are sold, the hangers they're displayed on, the bags you carry your purchase home in -- none of it is new. All donated. All getting a second life before just going into the landfill.

I give you this preamble to explain why my visit yesterday left me wistful. June 8 was their last sale of the year. For the house simply too big to efficiently air condition and it gets hot in there on sunny, humid days. As of 3:00 Saturday, it closed until September.

I didn't really need anything, but I wanted to be part of the last sale day. In their efforts to clear as much out as possible before closing for summer, they marked everything down. Just about everything in the first-floor rooms was $1.* I ended up with a bright pink t-shirt, a black t-shirt, and a pair of sunglasses, all for $3.

I did see people leaving with those massive Bath Bed and Beyond bags filled with stuff, though. That made me happy, because the proceeds go to:

•  A daycare center that charges on a sliding scale, depending on what the family can afford (the organization was around back in 1922 and has benefited from these sales ever since)
•  A clinic that provides medical and dental care to children whose families can't pay for private health care
•  Senior services, especially transportation to/from medical appointments
And my two favorites ...
•  The food pantry
•  The animal shelter

*I didn't venture down to the basement, where books, hardware and small appliances are sold.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: I'm Moving On (1965)
 
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

1) In this song, Chyvonne Scott sings that she's sick of her lover's "conniving." Tell us about a time you felt deceived. (It doesn't have to involve romance.) Remember when Attorney General Barr did his book report on the Mueller Report? I felt deceived and disappointed. I had hoped Barr would rise to the occasion, but instead he behaved like a partisan and shaded the truth. There are people -- voters! -- walking around out there who believe Robert Mueller exonerated President Trump.

2) She realizes it's time to move on to another love. What's your favorite love song? Is it about a relationship that's running smoothly? Or is it like "I'm Moving On," about an unhappy love affair? My favorite songs change. The one that's on my mind this morning is a sad one, about a non-affair. "You Don't Know Me" has been recorded time and again since Eddy Arnold had a hit with it in 1956. But here's my favorite, by Jann Arden, from My Best Friend's Wedding soundtrack.




3) Though Chyvonne Scott enjoyed only limited success as a recording artist, she was very popular in New York clubs. When did you most recently listen to music performed live? To celebrate Black History Month, a faith-based Chicago rapper, John the Rap'tist, performed at lunchtime at our office. I enjoyed his talk before (about how Christianity informs his work) and afterward (about working with Beyonce and Jay-Z) more than his performance. He was completely charming, but I don't like rap.

4) In 2017, this song appeared on a Samsung commercial that poked fun at rival iPhone. Is your cell phone an Apple or Android? How did you choose your phone? Nearly two years ago, I went into the local T Mobile store with my broken phone and said, "HELP! I need a new phone but I don't use it very often so give me a cheap one." They hooked me up with Aristo. $50 down and $6/month, about $120 altogether. It's a fine phone that lets me take pictures, text, summon Uber, and occasionally actually make a call. I don't need more. 

5) Chyvonne is an unusual name. In 1965, when this song was first released, the most popular baby names in the US were Michael and Lisa. Do you have any Michaels or Lisas in your life? So many Michaels! From my brother-in-law to my boss. Only one Lisa, though. That would be Snarkypants herself. She recently gave me access to her Netflix account, which is life altering for a vid kid like me. (Thank you, Snarkela.)

6) Also in 1965, Winston Churchill died. In researching this week's Sat. 9, Sam discovered a Churchill quote that's new to her: "I am always ready to learn although I do not always like being taught." Share something interesting that you recently learned. You know those window envelopes you get in the mail every day? The man who invented them was Americus Callahan of Chicago, IL. He saved American businesses tons of time and money by eliminating the need to type or print an address on the outer envelope. Thank you, Americus!

7) In 1965, one of the most successful movies ever made, The Sound of Music, was released. Have you ever seen it? A gazillion times. Maybe more.

8) Lava lamps were already popular in England and Brussels, but in 1965 they were introduced in the US. Do you think lava lamps are cool? I think they're kinda silly. They don't emit much light, you know.

9) Random question -- You have to buy something very personal that you find embarrassing. Would you rather pay cash for it, so your identity would be unknown but you'd have to face the cashier? Or order it online, where you could avoid looking anyone in the eye, but you have to share your name and address? Online. It feels more anonymous, somehow. Though now that you mention it, it's really not since you have to give all your personal information. I suppose it's the price I pay to avoid eye contact.