Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Since U Been Gone (2005)

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here. 

 

1) In this song, Kelly Clarkson is dissatisfied with her relationship and she's moving on. What's something you've moved on from lately? It could be anything from a romance to the laundry detergent you've been using for years. I've moved on from Trader Joe's. I don't have a car and walk everywhere, and somehow it doesn't seem worth the extra couple blocks when Target is closer. 

 

2) She sings that she can now breathe. Studies have shown that July can be a good month for allergy sufferers because trees and grasses are no longer pollinating. How are your eyes, ears, nose and throat this morning? No complaints.

 

3) Kelly complains that their romance reminds her of a "stupid love song." Let's be more positive: what love song do you associate with positive memories? This is the song I first recall hearing Paul McCartney sing on The Ed Sullivan Show, back when I was 6 years old. It's the moment I fell in love with him. I saw him perform it live in concert at Wrigley Field in 2011. He's coming back to Chicago this fall – just in time for my birthday! – and I hope to be in the audience when he sings it live once again.

 

 

 

 

4) While Kelly's first love is music, she's established herself as a TV personality. In addition to her daytime talk show, she's been a judge on The Voice and hosted an awards show. Have you ever been on TV? Oh, this feels so long ago now! I was at a downtown hotel (The Congress?) on November 3, 1992, with a crowd of other Clinton campaign volunteers, awaiting the election results. This was before BIG flat screen TVs. Instead there were several sets positioned around the conference room and I was sitting on the floor, looking up at one, as Bill gave his acceptance speech live from Little Rock. A local station (channel 7?) captured the moment and used it as part of a news story about how much younger Bill's campaign workers and voters were than Bush's. I was 35 at the time and didn't feel all that young (but hey! I could still easily sit on the floor and bounce back up) but there I was in the front row. I didn't see it, of course. I was still downtown partying. But my mom did and was quite proud. 

5) She has confessed a weakness for Doritos. Would we find salty snacks in your kitchen right now? No. But that's just because I have finished them all.

 

6) Kelly has found her weight the source of public debate. Are you like Kelly, whose weight fluctuates? Or does it stay stable? I was thin until I had my hysterectomy at 54. Then I rapidly gained a ton of weight and have never taken it off.

 

7) In 2005, when this song was popular, a motorist made news in Texas when he was ticketed for driving over 200 mph in a 75 mph zone. Have you ever been pulled over by the police? I have a vague recollection of being in a car that was pulled over back in the 1980s. The memory is hazy because I was pretty drunk but the driver was not. He was not ticketed for whatever it was and was very glad that I kept my mouth shut for once while he was talking to the officer.

 
8) Also in 2005, Tom Cruise had a pop culture moment when he famously jumped on a sofa. Do you remember where he did this? Oprah.

 

9) Random question: Tell us about a photo you wish you'd taken, but didn't. Over the 4th of July weekend I got together with my friends Patty and Bob. I wish one of us had thought to snap a picture.

 

Thursday Thirteen #419

Get lost! Last week I discovered Almanac.com, the official website of The Old Farmer's Almanac. It's a great website to get lost in and a wonderful resource to mine for Thursday Thirteen.

As I was tooling around the site, I noticed many posts began with the phrase, "How to Get Rid of ..." Getting rid of things is a hot topic with Almanac readers, and here are links to 13 of the literally dozens of posts on the subject.

HOW TO GET RID OF ... 

1. Ants.

2. Bad Smells. This focuses on carpets, upholstery and appliances, but not ...

3. Body Odor.

4. Canker Sores. I read this one and have learned that there's a difference between canker and cold sores. Thank you, Old Farmer's Almanac! 

5. Colorado Potato Beetles. "Despite their name, they don't affect only gardens in Colorado!" 

6. Fruit Flies.

7. Groundhogs.  

8. Head Lice.

9. Pantry Moths.

10. Scale on Plants.

11. Slugs and Snails. 

12. Thrips. Until this moment, I'd never hear of thrips. I just learned they are, "sucking insects that can cause some damage to plants." Now I have a great new Scrabble word.

13. Voles. 

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

 

 

WWW.WEDNESDAY

 

 

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

PS I no longer participate in WWW.WEDNESDAY via that link because her blog won't accept Blogger comments. I mention this only to save you the frustration I experienced trying to link up.

1. What are you currently reading? Agatha Raisin and the Witch of Wyckhadden by M.C. Beaton. The 9th book in the series finds our girl Aggie on holiday. She went to at a seaside resort out of season, thinking it would be a relaxing retreat but instead she's bored. Everything around her is old and dull – the decor as well as the other guests. Then she meets the village police commissioner. Could this be a new love interest for Agatha? It gets complicated when the sleepy community suffers its first murder in decades, and of course Agatha, the outsider, is viewed with suspicion.

 

What I love about this series is how real Agatha is. She can be vain and vulnerable and she makes me laugh. While she sometimes annoys me, I can't help rooting for her. 

 

2. What did you recently finish reading? A Murder in Hollywood: The Untold Story of Tinseltown's Most Shocking Crime by Casey Sherman. A sensational real-life scandal: The aging movie queen calls the police because her dead gangster lover is bleeding on her bedroom carpet, and her teenage daughter admits to wielding the knife that killed him. It's impossible to overestimate what a big news story this was in 1958, and it's still jaw-dropping stuff today.

Lana Turner's sordid story gets an in depth treatment here. I read it quickly and learned a few new things about both Lana and mob boss Mickey Cohen, who was involved up to his eyeballs. 

But I really hated the writing. Sometimes Lana puffs her cigarette nervously, other times she takes deep drags. Who made note of her every cig more than 65 years ago? Bugsy Siegel makes a point over a meal in his breakfast nook as he butters his roll. Are you sure, Casey Sherman? Do you know for a fact Bugsy didn't slather jam on his toast or bite into a cheese danish? This crap not only made me roll my eyes, it took away from the gravity of the story. A woman was terrorized, a man was murdered, a teenage girl was scarred for life. It shouldn't be treated like a lurid Lifetime movie.

3. What will you read next? The Spellman Files by Lisa Lutz. 

 

 

 

 

Getting by and moving on

 I'm OK. I'm not great. I'm not thrilled. But I'm also not blue. I have moments when I'm very happy or very lonely, but for the most part, I'm OK. 

I watch baseball, specifically my first place Chicago Cubs. I read and watch TV. I work on my Postcards to Swing States and Letters Against Isolation. I've volunteered twice already for the local library book fair and will be back there again tonight. I have my job at the card shop. I cuddle my cats. I exchange emails with my niece about her new baby, Violet, and that always lifts my spirits. I haven't been to yoga because it's been too damn hot – I can't bear going from the hot studio into 95º heat outside – but I know I'll be back. 

 

What I don't have are my perennials. I don't have my besties, John and Henry. Since they died last year, a day hasn't gone by that I haven't wanted to reach for the phone and call one of them. My oldest friend is not really my friend anymore. She's struggling so with her own physical and medical issues that she simply can't be an equal partner in this relationship. She won't talk or write, but she does regularly IM with pictures of Paul McCartney. Oh! What I wouldn't give for a long phone call from her or Henry! Just catching up and laughing. Or to sit in a bar with John, watching the world go by and laughing. 

 

I miss laughing.

 

Things won't change unless I change them. So I have promised myself I will socialize once a week. Chatting with coworkers at the store or fellow volunteers doesn't count. Every week I must make an effort to dine with someone, to strengthen our bond. Two weeks ago, I had dinner with Joan, a classmate from the Class of 75 who was passing through Chicagoland. Last week I had lunch with Elaine. Sunday I talked baseball and old movies with Bob and Patricia, a local couple I met at the TCM Film Festival.* This weekend I'll have lunch with my nephew.

 

It's the same every time: At first, I don't want to go. There's always something I'd rather do at home alone. But then I'm always glad I went.

 

I approach it with the same attitude I have toward doing my morning stretches or drinking more water. Socializing will improve my quality of life. 

 

I miss my old life. I miss friends who are gone and not coming back. I miss laughing.

 

But my life is not without its joys and I must appreciate them. I must – as the old song says – accentuate the positive and latch on to the affirmative.  

 

With the help of God and the direction of my (very good) therapist, I believe I'll be happy again. Even if happy at 67 doesn't look or feel like happy at 37 did.

 

  

*Yes, I traveled 2000 miles to find myself on Hollywood Blvd., waiting for the light to change, standing beside a couple who lives in my zip code.

 

Photo by Anastasia Vityukova on Unsplash  

Sunday Stealing

F.A.B.

F. Film: What movie or tv show are you watching? I watched Yankee Doodle Dandy, because I do that every year.

A. Audio: What are you listening to? I borrowed this CD from the public library. RIP, Brian Wilson.

B. Book: What are you reading? Also borrowed from the library. I love this series.

 

 

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Lady Liberty (2018)
... because it's 4th of July weekend.

Hear Barbra Streisand sing it here.

1) This song is a Valentine to the Statue of Liberty. Have you ever visited Lady Liberty? I have seen it in person but it was closed for repairs the day I visited. 

 

2) When you combine the lady herself and her pedestal, she stands 22 stories high. What's the tallest building you've ever been in? I worked in Sears Tower (110 stories) and the AON Building (83 floors). While the views are breathtaking – and made boring meetings more endurable – the tourists really got on my nerves. I'm afraid when I was working, I was not a very welcoming hostess to those visiting Chicago.

 

3) Her crown represents universal liberty with seven spikes for the seven seas. Without looking it up, can you name the seven seas? Nope.

 

4) The song was written by Desmond Child, a Cuban-American from Gainesville, home of the University of Florida. In 1965, a team of UF scientists invented Gatorade. Do you have any Gatorade in your home right now? Nope.

5) While best known for his work with KISS, Bon Jovi and Cher, Desmond Child was nominated for an Emmy for his work on the Muppets 2003 holiday special. This morning, as we enjoy summer, what's the first Christmas carol that pops into your head? "White Christmas." 

6) Desmond wrote this song specifically for Barbra Streisand. Watching her record it was a dream come true and he found himself standing very close to her as she sang. When he asked if he was "hovering," she suggested it might be better if he gave her a little more space. Does it bother you when someone stands very close or reads over your shoulder? This question reminds me of my mom. While it doesn't bother me, it made her CRAZY to have anyone read over her shoulder.

7) Fireworks were introduced to celebrate the 4th because they represent the "rockets red glare and bombs bursting in air." When did you most recently sing "The Star Spangled Banner?" I never sing it. I only move my lips. I am desperately embarrassed by my singing voice. (But yes, of course I know the lyrics.)

8) John Adams predicted the 4th would be observed with "pomp and parades." Does your community have a parade in honor of the day? Yes. I was invited to march in it to help publicize our upcoming library book sale. I declined. I'm a fat old lady with bad knees and it was a humid 92º at parade time.

9) Celebrity chef Rachael Ray says she considers mini-hamburgers, or "sliders," the All-American food. What will/did you dine on this 4th of July? I had a steak, potato salad and a green salad.

 

I'm learning to teach

"You teach people how to treat you by what you allow, what you stop, and what you reinforce." That's a quote from Tony Gaskins, a life coach who has worked with college and pro athletes. I heard it from Joe Maddon on his Book of Joe podcast.

This little chapter began with the No Kings rally. My friend Nancy had been asking when we could get together. I know she's politically progressive and she used to live in my neighborhood, so it seemed like a good idea. She could come here for the rally and then we could have lunch. 

Nancy and her husband Paul met me by the WWI memorial. We listened to the speakers – or tried to; predictably, the mics didn't work very well. That's where it started. The speakers weren't very good. The crowd was too old and too white. As we marched through the village business district, Nancy complained that she could smell pot in the air. Everything was wrong, or bad, or insufficient.

She was like this all day. Grumpy, pissy, displeased. She even complained about the parking garage next to my apartment building because it's unattractive. "How long has that been here?" Twenty five years, at least. Really, I was happiest when we were eating lunch and she excused herself to go to the bathroom.

I tried to figure out why she was like this. Both she and her husband are out of work so maybe money's a concern. It was Father's Day weekend, so maybe she was missing her son. It's been almost four years since he died, but I bet holidays like Father's Day will always be painful. Or maybe ... or maybe ... or maybe ...

But here's the thing: Fond as I am of Nancy, I don't think she ever twists herself up like a pretzel trying to figure me out. I suspect she never worries about what motivates, hurts or hinders me. That revelation left me feel lonely. 

Then I puked. A couple days later, I was giving the living room/dining room a quick once over with vacuum cleaner before going downtown to meet Elaine. Suddenly I was nauseous. It surprised me, because while I have a sensitive gut I don't often throw up. I sipped some water and called Elaine, apologizing for cancelling on such short notice but telling her that I didn't feel comfortable going out so soon after vomiting. Her first, instinctive response? "Do you need anything?" How sweet is Elaine!

Then I heard Joe. "You teach people how to treat you by what you allow, what you stop, and what you reinforce." Somehow, when I heard Joe say it through my headphones, it really resonated. So I acted on it. I shot Elaine an email, thanking her for offering to help when I was ill. For always offering to help. For being Elaine. Her kindness – so spontaneous – should be acknowledged and reinforced. It felt good to do, and she appreciated it.

Then I went out to lunch with two ex-co-workers. Both Rita and my former art director talk to me often but never too each other, so I thought it would be nice if we had a little reunion. It's been two years since the three of us were in the same place at the same time.

Predictably, the two of them did most of the talking. As I say, it's been two years since they spoke. But when I finally tried to hold court, Rita began checking her phone. I could tell she was in a hurry to get home because she'd only paid for two hours of parking. I get it: she's a single working mom on a budget and downtown parking can be expensive. But I was hurt, too.

I mean, here are two women who profess to adore me. And I believe them. But at no point did either of them say, "How are you, Gal?" In fact, now that I think of it, when they call me, it's to call on me. It's when my art director is feeling lonely, or Rita needs career/personal advice. 

I heard Joe's voice in my head: "You teach people how to treat you by what you allow, what you stop, and what you reinforce." So I spoke up. I mentioned Elaine, and how much it meant to me that she offered to help, even before I could ask. I mentioned the drama of Violet's birth, and how I long to discuss it with Henry, whom I miss every day. Rita said she was sorry, that it was her fault she never sees past my "good boss energy." My art director said she hopes I'll be "kind to myself" and that I should call her any time. Then the three of us went our separate ways.

Four days later, the most extraordinary thing happened. Rita called me. Not because she was overwhelmed by family drama or feeling insecure professionally. No, she called because her little boy was with her ex for the night and she wanted to see how I am. 

My heart sang.

"You teach people how to treat you by what you allow, what you stop, and what you reinforce."  

Thanks, Joe (and Tony).

 

Thursday Thirteen #418

 

But I don't cook! I was having a tough time thinking of an idea for this week's TT when voila! The Old Farmer's Almanac Readers' Best Recipes came in the mail.* Problem solved. I don't cook and normally I'd just put this booklet downstairs in our shared laundry room for someone who might want it – and that's where it will still end up – but it does give me fodder for a post.

Each of these recipes was submitted to the Old Farmer's Almanac by a reader and then taste tested by their kitchen team. If one of them looks tempting to you, you can find the full recipe and a photo at Almanac.com. 

1. Stuffed French Toast. It's baked in the oven instead of fried on the stove top, so you use less butter and clean up is easier.

2. Florentine Spinach Dip. This recipe has a lot of cheese in it, which sounds good to me. The Almanac taste testers agree. One even asked to lick the casserole bowl. 

3. Apple Slaw with Honey Mustard Vinaigrette. A light side dish. "The sweetness of the apple and honey complements the green onions, mustard and vinegar."

4. Slow Cooker French Onion Soup. I see there's Parmesan in the recipe, which I'm sure enhances it. The Almanac team reports that it's "very good and very easy to make."

5. Blue Cheese Brussels Sprouts. OK, this one doesn't appeal to me at all. It's a baked dish, which I suppose is a good way to prepare Brussels sprouts – if you like that sort of thing.

6. Not-Too-Spicy Veggie and Lentil Chili. It's a one-pot recipe that can be prepared on a slow cooker (which I'd expect) or on a stove top. 

7. Traditional Potato Salad. I smiled when I saw this recipe because it includes both Miracle Whip and mayonnaise. Maybe potato salad could have resolved the long-running, good-natured argument between my mom (Team Miracle Whip) and my niece (Mayo Forever!).

8. Celebration Meatballs. Do you like your meatballs spicy or mild? This recipe gives you ideas for how to dial up, or down, the spice in the sauce.

9. Oatmeal Berry Bars. I like this one because like #8, we're given an easy way to adapt this one. If you prefer your bars extra chewy, substitute almond meal for half the flour. 

10. Hawaiian Shrimp Tacos. Shrimp, with pineapple salsa and wasabi dressing. While the tacos are definitely neat looking, this one looks like a lot of work. The pineapple salsa also works well on salmon.

11. Kat's Tortellini Salad. Now this one, on the other hand, looks pretty easy. Except for the sliced, marinated artichoke hearts. I wouldn't do that myself, I'd use the store bought ones. But that's me. In culinary terms, I'm just one notch above a savage.

12. Nana's Apple Pecan Cake. Here's something I never notice or consider: When slicing cake, do frosting or crumbs stick on the knife? Apparently this is a big deal to people who take this baking thing seriously. So here's a pecan cake that's easy to slice into "clean" slices.

13. Fresh Mexican Salsa. This recipe was developed by an American living in Tokyo. She missed Mexican food and experimented with ingredients available to her over there. When she landed on this recipe, she not only used it for chips and dips, she spooned it onto scrambled eggs for breakfast.

Let me know if any of these appeal to you. Remember, you can find the full recipes  at Almanac.com. 

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

 

*It was included in a fundraising appeal for Boys Town.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

 

 

 

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

PS I no longer participate in WWW.WEDNESDAY via that link because her blog won't accept Blogger comments. I mention this only to save you the frustration I experienced trying to link up.

1. What are you currently reading? A Murder in Hollywood: The Untold Story of Tinseltown's Most Shocking Crime by Casey Sherman. A glamorous actress – a household name – is involved with the murder of a mobster. In her bedroom. By her teenage daughter. It's impossible to overestimate what a big news story this was in 1958. 

 

The Lana Turner scandal gets an in depth treatment here. Casey Sherman works hard to put the sordid incident in context. He not only tells us Lana's story, but also that of Mickey Cohen, the mob kingpin who employed the thug on the bedroom rug. So far, the writing is really clunky, though. 

 

PS Lana Turner starred in the movie version of Peyton Place, the book Cher is reading in the tub. 

 

2. What did you recently finish reading? PT-109: An American Epic of War, Survival and the Destiny of John F. Kennedy by William Doyle.  A Japanese destroyer collided with a PT boat in August 1943. The US Navy made no attempt at rescue, assuming that all 13 men aboard were lost. The US Navy was wrong, and in 18 years, one of those 13 would be the Commander in Chief. On the face of it, that's a great wartime saga. The reality doesn't disappoint.

Doyle takes us through Kennedy's naval career and then into politics. But he always frames JFK's life through a PT-109 lens, and it's effective. The context taught me a lot about post war Japan-US relations, and how meaningful it was to the Japanese that the President was in cordial contact with the commander of the Amagiri, the man who nearly missed killing him during wartime.*

I admit I am not that interested in battles on air, sea or land, so the passages about what went on aboard PT-109 that fateful night didn't really mean that much to me. What about the radio? What about the radar? Don't care. What I did find gripping – and, frankly, left me in awe – was Kennedy's 8-day battle to keep his men alive and get them to safety after they washed up on a small island. No fresh water. No food. Since many of the men had removed their pants and lost their shoes as they swam miles from their wreckage to shore, the sharp coral and hot sand were perilous. Two of the men sustained bad burns, so infection was another enemy. Oh yeah, and there was the tropical bugs and unrelenting sun. Morale could have sunk like their ship. After all, it didn't take the men long to realize the Navy was not looking for them. I might have given up. OK, I'm sure I would have given up. But JFK would not let them give up.

I don't have to tell you that Kennedy survived the ordeal and became a decorated war hero. What I didn't know before this book was that in November, Kennedy took command of a second PT boat, and then rescued more than 30 marines whose ship had been damaged and was sinking.

August to November: That's a shit-ton of heroism in barely 90 days.

I know our current President would be dismissive. To paraphrase what he said on camera about John McCain, Donald Trumps likes sailors whose ships aren't destroyed. I disagree. 

*A Japanese sailor who had been aboard the Amagiri that night made a comment that stayed with me: "He avoided death in war but was murdered in a parade." That's as profound a reflection on the vagaries of life as I've ever heard. 

3. What will you read next? I don't know.

 

 

 

Sunday Stealing

Just Another Manic Monday

1. What is something you should throw away, but just can't bring yourself to part with? I have so many plastic food containers! I don't need them and they're taking up space.

2. When you make yourself a sandwich, do you cut it on the diagonal, straight up the middle, or not at all? Not at all.

3. What song or sound brings back memories of childhood? Teen dream Bobby Sherman died this past week. Hearing snippets of this on the news really brought me back to junior high.

  

4. Who is the first person you call when you have good news? Depends on what it's pertaining to. But probably my friend Elaine. Maybe my nephew.

5. Have you ever set out on a walk in the rain? Nope.

 

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Consider Me Gone (2009)

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here. 

 

1) In this song, poor Reba McEntire confronts a lover who makes her feel like she's not good enough. Let's go in a more positive direction: Who in your life makes you feel happy and secure? The team at the card shop. Those girls – and boy, are they young! – are so supportive. I just had my performance review and it was glowing. Much better than I expected (or frankly, than I think I deserve). I feel like Sally Field ...

 

2) Reba hopes her lover will look back on her as someone who used to make him laugh. Who did you most recently laugh with? This question is hard because it reminds me of my late friend John. He was part of my life for more than 40 summers and, oh, how we laughed! I laugh easily and have fun with all my friends, but not like I did with John.

 

3) She was director James Cameron's first choice to play Molly Brown in the 1997  blockbuster Titanic, but she had to turn down the role because she was committed to a concert tour. Think of the last invitation you received. Did you say yes or no? A classmate from The Class of 1975 was passing through and invited me to dinner with her husband and big brother (Class of 1972). I wasn't enthusiastic, but I said yes. Turns out we had a lovely time, and I'm glad I went.

4) Reba comes from a rodeo family: both her father and grandfather were champion steer ropers and her mother was a barrel racer. Have you ever been to a rodeo? Yes, but I remember very little about it. Except that I felt bad for the steers.

5) She loves game nights with family and friends because she says she's "a competitive person." When you play friendly board or card games, do you always play to win? I have no "killer instinct." I enjoy games but I don't much care who wins.

 

6) Reba wears tall boots all the time, even in summer, and has more than 100 pairs. Do you often wear boots? I never wear tall boots. For me, boots aren't a fashion accessory, they are something that keeps me from slipping on ice.

 

7) In 2009, when this song was popular, Mark Zuckerberg tried unsuccessfully to buy Twitter. Elon Musk acquired it in 2022 and renamed it X. Do you often post to Twitter/X? Not anymore. Since Elon took over, it's become quite the hellscape. So many conspiracy theories and so much hate! My classic movie friends have all joined me over at Bluesky.

 
8) Back in 2009, DuPont announced that silver and black were the most popular vehicle colors, accounting for half the cars the world over. What color is your ride? No car.

 

9) Random question: Have you ever had a job that required you to wear a hairnet? Nope.

 

 

 

Thursday Thirteen #417

Peter Falk's Law. Last week I did a TT about Peter Falk's most famous role, TV's Columbo. In researching it, I discovered that Falk's final illness and death in 2011 inspired elder care legislation. 

1. Peter Falk and his wife Alyce had two daughters, Jackie and Catherine. The couple divorced when Catherine was five years old. The following year, Falk remarried Shera Danese.

2. In later years, Falk suffered declining health. He made his final acting appearance at age 82. After that, he retired, having been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease.

3. Shera Danese Falk was named his conservator. This was not unusual, as they had been married for decades. Friends agreed they were a devoted couple, and Shera would be mentioned on Falk's tombstone, which reads, "I'm not here. I'm home with Shera."

4. There were problems, though, between Mrs. Falk and her adult stepdaughters. Especially Catherine. At one point Catherine filed a lawsuit against her father when he stopped paying her college tuition as promised. Catherine referred to this as a "bump in the road" and maintains that while she and her father had reconciled, her stepmother remained distrustful and divisive. 

5. Catherine Falk filed to become her father's conservator. During the last years of their father's life, Catherine testified that she and her sister were not allowed to see or speak to him, nor were they made aware of changes in his medical condition.

6. She was denied. The court found that Peter was well cared for and there was no evidence whatsoever that Mrs. Falk was neglectful or abusive to her husband. 

7. Catherine Falk learned that in California at that time, there were no laws to guarantee children visitation. Even though a judge granted Catherine limited access to her father (30 minutes, 2x week), there was no way to legally enforce that and she believed her stepmother was intentionally keeping her father isolated from his daughters.  

8. Peter Falk's daughters found out about their father's death from the media. They were not invited to his funeral. 

9. So Catherine got to work. She began lobbying California lawmakers in an effort to give children the right to be notified when their parents go through what she called, "life-changing events." 

10. California now has Peter Falk's Law. It provides that children and siblings of a patient have a right to notified when that patient "requires acute medical care for more than three days, or dies."

11. The law now also puts a system in place for children and siblings to appeal for visitation. This way, hopefully, others won't suffer Catherine's frustration (#7).

12. Catherine's quest was never about her father's money. While details are not known, Catherine and Jackie each received a "six-figure" inheritance from their father. Catherine has used the money for legal fees and establishing Falk-NASGA (National Association to Stop Guardian Abuse).

13. Twelve states have now enacted a version of Peter Falk's Law.

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

 

 

WWW.WEDNESDAY

 

 

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

PS I no longer participate in WWW.WEDNESDAY via that link because her blog won't accept Blogger comments. I mention this only to save you the frustration I experienced trying to link up.

1. What are you currently reading? PT-109: An American Epic of War, Survival and the Destiny of John F. Kennedy by William Doyle. 

Doyle argues that, when a Japanese destroyer collided with a certain PT boat in August 1943, American history was changed forever. His premise is that, without that tragedy, John F. Kennedy would not have had a political career, and that civil rights, Vietnam and the space program would have all unfolded very differently. So Doyle examines JFK's naval career, that fateful night, and the impact it had on him as a man and as a political entity. 

 

Does this book have a pro-JFK slant? Yes. But that's because that night and for the weeks to come, the man was a hero. I crave heroism right now.

 

2. What did you recently finish reading? The Last Mrs. Parrish by Liv Constantine. Is this psychological thriller soapy, campy and dumb? Yes. Did I enjoy it? God help me, yes. 

Amber is jealous. She's leading an average life but believes she deserves more. So she's targeted rich and beautiful society wife Daphne Parrish. In a methodical and creepy way, Amber insinuates herself into Daphne's life in hopes of taking it over and replacing her as Mrs. Parrish.

The dialog is sappy. The plot holes are cavernous. I was sticking with it because I hate to mark a book DNF. But about 2/3 through, there's a plot twist that nearly redeemed it and I devoured the ending in greedy gulps. I actually resented anything that took me away from Amber and Daphne! 

I just read that J-Lo is making this into a movie, casting herself as Daphne. I'll be there for it. I am a sucker for good trash. 

3. What will you read next? I don't know.

 

 

 

Violet check in

My niece sent me a link to the results of the baby's first photo shoot and while I spent a ton of time staring at them in awe, they are not the shots that touched my heart. No, it was the casual pic of my niece holding her tiny (so tiny!) baby in her arms in the library parking lot that got to me. It was taken after they had just signed Violet up for her Summer Reading Challenge. The librarian recommends books appropriate to every age group and considering that Violet is a preemie –  her original due date hasn't even arrived yet – I find it extraordinary and wonderful that she's already been to her local public library! We can almost say she's been reading since before she was born.

Not Violet

She's wearing oversized sunglasses in the picture. They cover nearly her entire face, which is a good thing because people underestimate how hot the Midwestern sun can be and we're having a heatwave. My niece reports that the hospital warned against sunscreen for her – again, she is especially sensitive to not only to the environment but to the chemicals in even the mildest lotion. Also, she seldom opens her eyes yet. This is not unusual for a preterm baby.

My niece is positively glowing in that library parking lot picture. I am so happy for her, but also worried. The adoption is not yet finalized, so there's that. Now I'm worried about Violet's development. She is so small! Stay positive, Gal, stay positive.