Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing

Would you ever consider becoming a teacher? Yes. When I was a kid I wanted to be a teacher.

 Would you ever give a hitch-hiker a ride somewhere? No.

 Would you ever try fasting for a whole week? No.

 Would you ever try to quit one of your addictions? "One of" my addictions? What a cheery question! I probably am addicted to caffeine, and I should give it up. Sorry that's all I have to report.

 Would you ever dye your hair purple? I did. It was the 80s.

 Would you ever spend $100 for the best tasting hamburger in the world? Sure. Though I insist that the bill include the side of my choice, tax and tip. $100 for a beef dish dinner in a really nice restaurant is certainly not unheard of.

 Would you rather chew gum off the ground or kill a squirrel? First of all, what's the penalty for doing neither? I suppose I'll go with the gum. Children do it every day and they somehow manage to grow up into adults.

  Would you rather play Monopoly or Operation? Monopoly

 Would you rather eat chocolate or fruity candies? Chocolate

 Would you rather listen to one CD forever or become deaf? The CD ... and it's going to The Beatles White Album. If it's Barry Manilow, I'd rather be deaf.

 Would you rather be deaf or blind? Deaf

 Would you rather text or talk on the phone? Talk on the phone

 Would you rather spend a day with Lady Gaga or Miley Cyrus? Gaga

 Would you rather learn to play piano or guitar? Guitar

 Would you rather have a stomach-ache or headache? Headache

 Would you rather be overly interesting or overly dull? Overly interesting

 Would you rather be too loud or too quiet? Too quiet

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 16

Today's happiness -- A day at the zoo.  My cousin Rose and I went to Brookfield Zoo, walking distance from where I grew up, and a staple in my summers as a kid. We spent about 10 hours together -- which was about 1 hour too long because at dinner we did start to get on one another's nerves -- but it was by and large a very good day. Okapis, giraffes, penguins, primates, lions and tigers and a rhino. I learned a lot (most especially that I should avoid palm oil for the sake of the rainforests and orangutans) and thoroughly enjoyed a day that, frankly, I'd been kinda dreading. My cousin has always loved me very much, and I get much warmth and comfort from it.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Mine Would Be You

1) The lyrics mention his respect for "90 proof and Marlboro Red." What was your most recent drink? When was your last cigarette? Cranberry juice and vodka/never

2)  They also reference "singing like crazy fools." What's the last song you sang? "She's Gone" along with Hall and Oates on my shower radio.

3) Blake Shelton won a Grammy for his performance of this song. Crazy Sam won the award for "most improved bowler" when she was in third grade, and it's now in a closet somewhere. Do you have any trophies? If so, where are they? No trophies. Projects I've worked on have won industry awards, but the companies I worked for got the hardware.

4) Blake is currently on tour. The merchandise sold at concerts brings in big money for the artist. Do you have any tour memorabilia (like a poster or t-shirt)? Lots. I'm having a quilt made from some of them.

5) In addition to The Voice, Shelton is on TV a lot with his Pizza Hut commercials. What chain restaurant is nearest your home? Do you eat there? Subway, and I go there very seldom. It's so easy to make a sandwich I can't see paying someone else to do it.

6) Shelton has a million-seller CD called Cheers! It's Christmas! What's the first Christmas carol to pop into your head this hot summer Saturday? "Oh, Come All Ye Faithful"

7) Shelton and Miranda Lambert were married in front of 550 guests. Do you enjoy weddings? Not really

8) The wedding took place on a big Texas ranch. Have you spent much time on a farm or a ranch? No

9) In 2013 he helped organize a relief benefit concert for victims of the Oklahoma tornados. Tell us about a charity you support. The last one I wrote a check to is Planned Parenthood. I like thinking about a world where every woman is healthy and every child is wanted.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 15

Today's happiness -- Eating like a child.  For lunch I had fish sticks with a side of buttered peas. I chose this because I found myself imagining the way the fish would smell. And then for dinner I had hotdogs and a side of canned peaches, chosen because I forgot to defrost the steak I was gonna have.

It was all very deja childhood and it made me smile.

Frank conversation

Robin Williams on his last birthday 7/14

In the wake of Robin Williams' death I've had two very honest and revealing conversations with close friends about depression and suicide. Inspiring us to speak candidly about this problem could be the funnyman's final gift to his audience.

My oldest friend confessed that she recently had contemplated suicide. I was not surprised to hear this -- I think I know exactly when it was -- but it was, of course, troubling. She said the only reason why she didn't do it was that she had the wrong kind of pills (meaning, for the most part, non lethal) in the house and was afraid that if she tried and failed she'd end up in the psych ward.

I didn't respond by telling her to "buck up." I know that she views me as tough ("Life can grind you into the dirt and yet you somehow get back up") and I didn't want to make her feel inferior. Instead I told her of a time more than 25 years ago when I thought about it. I was in so much pain that killing myself seemed like respite.

I didn't do it that night because I didn't have any pills and my little disposable Bic shavers couldn't do sufficient damage to my veins. I remember laying in bed, too depressed to move, cataloging everything I had failed at and was sadly amused that I could now add "coming up with a way to kill myself" to list. I heard the train rumble past my window and contemplated throwing myself on the tracks.

But then the sun came up again. I had a cat (her name was Wilma) to feed. I took a shower. It was a new morning. God had given me another day. So, as my oldest friend put, I somehow got back up. She seemed surprised that suicidal despair had washed over me, too. I wonder how many people we pass on the sidewalk each day are suffering similarly.

I think my confession helped my oldest friend feel less alone in her thoughts and fears. And, hopefully, she knows she can turn to me when she feels desperate and I'll understand.

I also talked to my friend John. He's no stranger to depression. He's been unlucky in love, lost the mother he was very close to, lost his kid sister to drugs, and has battled heart disease. Right now, at 60, he's underemployed and frightened about his financial future. Yet he says he's never entertained ending it. Ever.

This surprised me. For while I'm a Christian and my oldest friend dabbles by reading Depak Chopra, Joel Osteen and the Dali Lama, John is not spiritual in any conventional way. Yet his reason for not doing it was simple and powerful -- "What about the person who finds me?" Looked at that way, suicide to him seems monstrously selfish. He's right, of course. Suicide is (almost always) a selfish act. And it's good to be reminded what a nice man John is.

These conversations were sobering but they weren't sad. Sharing the intimate stuff is important. It brings us closer. And it helps combat the isolation that can be so crippling when we're depressed.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 14

Today's happiness -- Water.  Thursday found me staring out onto water a lot. The fountains in front of the building where I work are gorgeous. My table at the restaurant where I had lunch looked out onto a fountain, as well. As I waited for the elevator at the gym, I watched the water in the pool. And, best of all, Lake Michigan is visible from many windows at my office (though, alas, no longer my own). There's something very calming about gazing at water.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 13

Today's happiness -- Bringing the outdoors inside.  I always have flowers on my desk (this week it's orange and yellow carnations) and then there's my massive philodendron. A coworker abandoned it when he was let go 9 years ago, and I rescued and nurtured it. It's grown to fill a 10 gallon planter and a clipping occupies its own 7" pot.

I hate my office. Four of us are squished into a space originally designed for two and it feels like I work in a clown car. Having the flowers and the plants improves the space and ups my happiness quotient.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 12

Today's happiness -- Like minded people.  Tonight my classic film group met and more than 20 of us watched Alfred Hitchcock's Suspicion together. It was the first time many had seen this classic and it was neat to see their reaction.

More than that, I like how movies bring me together with people I wouldn't otherwise even meet. Tonight I sat with Bella, a girl young enough to be my daughter -- a budding workaholic who wanted to spend time with people who won't want to talk shop. Afterward, I got a ride to the train from Martha, the bus driving Buddhist. What do the three of us have in common? A crush on Cary Grant!

Someone I didn't know at all died yesterday

I wasn't a Robin Williams fan, especially. I liked him as Mork and loved Moscow on the Hudson and Good Will Hunting. But he worked a lot and consequently made a lot of drek. He also was such a scenery chewer that he frequently threw the balance of a piece off with his "look-at-me, look-at-me" improvising.

So why did I feel so awful yesterday when I heard he took his own life?

Because there was a naked vulnerability to him that I responded to. He was going to make us laugh, or cry, or at the very least pay attention, even if it depleted him. He put it all out there. Like Judy Garland or Janis Joplin. He was like those ladies in ways my antenna picked up and I just naturally felt something for him.

I also appreciated his willingness to playing against type. He played a psycho on an oft-repeated episode of Law & Order: SVU -- which was so poorly written it proves my point about his appearing in a lot of crap -- and hauntingly good as the villain in Insomnia and the desperately lonely clerk in One Hour Photo.

I hate suicide. I am sorry for the assistant who found him, sorry for his wife who has to decide whether to stay in the house where it happened, sorry for the children who now must cope with an inescapable patina of guilt on top of the pain that comes with losing a parent. Most of all I am sorry for the man who felt so smothered by circumstances that he couldn't see any point in waiting for another sunrise.

Rest in peace, Robin Williams.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 11

 
Today's happiness -- Back in the saddle.  I returned to the health club for the first time all month and did 30 mins. of cardio. It felt good.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 10

Today's happiness -- Spiritual reassurance.  Went to church this morning. Wasn't sure what I was going to get, since our reverend is on vacation. When we have lay ministers, the quality of the sermons can be rather spotty.

But I really wanted to go today because I've been so conflicted about how I feel about my older sister's health scare. Am I being self protective by keeping my distance in this family drama? Or am I cold? Will I regret not reaching out to her?

I needed God today, and God provided.

In addition to the comfort I get just from being in the sacred place that is our church, I got support from the congregation. For today, the subject was mental health and mental illness. The offering went to support NAMI, and the three sermonettes were enlightening and inspiring. The first two were caregivers, mothers of adult children with severe issues. The third was a very courageous member of our congregation who lives with bipolar disorder.

My takeaway is that it's OK for me to take care of myself in all this family drama. It doesn't make me selfish or bad. It makes me a person who loves herself.

I know this conclusion may seem like a "duh" moment to some of you (I read your comments to my original post and appreciated them more than you know) but sometimes there's a chasm between what I understand intellectually and what I feel in my heart.

Thanks to that hour at church, my head and my heart are in synch. And that makes me very happy.

Imaginative and provocative

Boyhood is a very ambitious and original movie. I've never seen anything quite like it. It was filmed over 12 years with the same cast, so we get to watch the characters age before our eyes.

Especially Mason, the "boy" of the title. He's a first grader when the movie begins and a college freshman when it ends. He goes from adorable to precocious to pretentious -- as we all did as we grew up. I didn't always like Mason, but I always related to him.

Patricia Arquette and Ethan Hawke are his parents. They, too, age over 12 years. I've never liked Hawke very much before, and didn't at the beginning of this movie, either. But he's matured and become more subtle as an actor, and that really pays off in the later segments.

This movie has no real plot. But then, neither do our real lives. It's a collection of moments, and it"s these moments that make up our lives. Because so much of it is effecting and so much care has gone into it, I felt guilty when my mind wandered. At more than 2 1/2 hours, it's too long.

Sunday Stealing

THIRTEEN THINGS

1. Outside my window… is a big, leafy tree

 2. I am thankful… for my independence

 3. In the kitchen… is a counterfull of stuff

 4. I am wearing… jeans

 5. I am creating… this blog post

 6. I am going… to take a nap and watch the ballgame

 7. I am reading… my first-ever Miss Marple book

 8. I am learning… that I'll never stop learning

 9. I am pondering… the random nature of things

 10. A favorite quote… "Forget your perfect offering/there's a crack in everything/that's how the light gets in." Leonard Cohen, "Anthem"

 11. One of my favorite things… Turner Classic Movies Summer Under the Stars. Today is 24 hours of Carole Lombard. She's completely charming.

 12. A few plans for the rest of the week… Classic Movie Meet Up on Tuesday. My cousin visits next Saturday.

 13. A peek into my day… I unintentionally answered this already (see #6).

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 9

Today's happiness -- Sleep. Since I came down with my cold last week, I've been feeling run down. Yesterday, I surrendered to the impulse and dozed whenever I felt like it. The result? I felt more vital and truly awake. I may try it again on Sunday.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Super Duper Love

If you're not familiar with today's song, you can hear it here.

 

1) The lyrics say, "I'm as proud as a girl can be." Tell us about something you're proud of. I'm proud of my career. I had little formal training for it, and yet here I have done rather well for myself.

2) This song is from her first CD, The Soul Sessions. She's told interviewers that the first CD she ever owned was by Aretha Franklin: Greatest Hits. So while we're talking firsts, do you remember your first CD (or tape or record)? It was most definitely vinyl. Meet the Beatles.

3) Last year, two men were convicted of plotting to kill Joss Stone. Even though she had (fortunately!) never even met the men, she still had to testify during their trial. Have you ever had to speak to a judge? I answered questions asked by a judge during voir dire. I've been called for jury duty three times, chosen once.

4) Joss is frequently in the British press because of her friendship with Princes William and Harry. Who among your friends leads the most exciting life? Though she doesn't consider herself very glam, I guess it would be my friend Barb. She and her husband recently bought themselves a summer home -- a Hilton Head condo just walking distance from the beach. Now she has two homes that are nicer than mine. :)
 

5) Because of dyslexia, Joss had trouble in school and dropped out when she was 16. What's the last grade you completed? I have some college hours. Not even enough for an Associate's.

6) She provided the voice of the villainness for the James Bond video game, Blood Stone. Do you have a Playstation or Xbox?  No.

7) Sam is especially crazy this morning because she can't find her phone. What's the last thing you misplaced? Nothing specific right now. Though historically I'm always losing umbrellas and sunglasses.

8) After composing this Saturday 9, Sam is off to Lowe's to pick up some heavy duty indoor/outdoor trash bags. Will you be in any stores this weekend? I have a coupon for CVS! 25% off my entire purchase!

9) Do you consider yourself more book smart, or street smart? Sometimes I don't consider myself either. But, I suppose, street smart.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 8

Today's happiness -- Javier Baez. Our brand-new second baseman made his debut at Wrigley Field today and got a noisy, bat-breaking single. He's a 21-year-old phenomenon who joined the team on the road last week and got a home run in each of those first games.

So now joins All Stars Anthony Rizzo at first and Starlin Castro at short. All are on the green side of 25. While it's obvious that this year isn't the year for my Cubbies, I am confident that better times are ahead.

Me and Morales

My older sister had heart surgery yesterday. According to my kid sister, the surgeon found blockages but she's going to recover and is leaving the hospital tomorrow.

I feel terrible about this. Because I don't feel bad.

I don't want her to be sick or die. I don't wish her discomfort or pain. I just don't care. And that makes me very sad.

She's a year older than I am, so we grew up together in the same house, and I have no good memories of her. Not a one. I have many bad memories. But I can't think of any shared jokes, whispered secrets, games or songs we shared. No advice she gave me. I just remember her hating me.

Throughout my childhood and adolescence she competed with me and belittled me -- at home, on the playground, at school, in Girl Scouts, at Sunday school. She always used to beat me. My oldest friend, an only child, recalls spending the day at our house and seeing my older sister wale on me with a pink hairbrush. When my friend got home, her mom asked her if she wished she had a sister; she thought a moment and said, "No." She scalded me … stood on my hair while she kicked me in the small of the back … threw me into the stove with such force she caused a gas leak …

My parents were in denial about her temper and her poor impulse control until the day she went at my mother with a broom. Then we all got dragged into family therapy -- for one session. My takeaway from this was (and remains) that within my family, it's OK for anyone to treat me anyway they wish. There's no downside to hurting me. As long as it's just me you're hurting. Lay a hand or utter a cross word to anyone else and it's a problem. But when it's me, well, it's not really a problem.

As women, I've avoided her. I saw her a few times this millennium as a favor to my mother. It made my mother so happy to see us together. I didn't feel that I'd found my soul mate or best friend. I just felt good that I was giving my mother the gift of seeing her children together.

Then my mom died and my sister got vicious about "her mother's estate." All "the estate" included was headaches and bills. My sister stuck me with all the expenses and then had the chutzpah to accuse me of trying to rip her off and threatened to sue me.

Threatened to sue me.

The rational me realizes that she was mad at my mother, not me. That by naming the executor, my mother was stirring up all the old competition and feelings of jealousy my older sister felt. She was hurt, and when she's wounded she's vicious.

I get that. And with that understanding comes a certain amount of compassion and forgiveness.

But not love. I don't love her. I don't even care. That makes me like Morales in A Chorus Line.

I was obsessed with A Chorus Line when it first came out. I've seen it onstage at least three times and have memorized the soundtrack. And all afternoon I've been channeling Diana Morales. Because I'm so very sad that I feel nothing.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 7

Today's happiness -- Beautiful summer weather. Upper 70's with a slight breeze. The sky filled with big, puffy white clouds. The sidewalks were filled with happy people, both downtown and at home in my village. Window shopping, dining al fresco, walking dogs. A good summery vibe all around.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 6

Today's Happiness (1) -- Walgreens. The drugstore chain is keeping their headquarters here in the United States, here in Illinois. This is very good news for all Americans, but especially those of us in the Chicago area. Walgreens is a major employer and I don't think our economy can bear another body blow right now. To celebrate, I bought my most recent box of Kleenex at Walgreens instead of CVS, my usual store of choice.

BTW, the national press keeps saying Walgreens is a "Chicago-based company." It's headquartered in Deerfield, one of the whiter white-bread suburbs. It couldn't be more different from Chicago. As offended as Chicagoans are by being confused with Deerfield, those folks must be even more upset. After all, Chicagoans are what they fled when they went to Deerfield.

Today's Happiness (2) -- Red Robin. A tiny little location on Michigan Avenue somehow escaped my notice ... until now. My burger was delicious. My gastrointestinal tract is not as enthusiastic as my palette, but I still don't regret my choice. It's that good. As the commercials say, YUMMMM!

WWW.WEDNESDAY

To play along, just answer the following three questions ...

• What are you currently reading? At Risk by Patricia Cornwell. It's filled with intrigue and intersecting plots: a cold case in Tennessee -- a vicious murder of a wealthy senior -- is somehow tied to a gruesome train fatality (suicide?) and for some reason these deaths are of vital interest to an ambitious Massachusetts DA.

It's a slim book, and if I hadn't been sidelined with a bad cold that left my brain as fuzzy as cotton candy I'd be done with it by now.

But beyond my broken brain, I'm struggling with it not because of the plot or the prose -- Cornwell's writing is dependably good -- but I've yet to find a character I really like in this story. Like most readers, I know PC best for her Scarpetta books and my very real affection for Kay can keep me reading no matter what. I don't have that in this stand-alone effort.

 

• What did you recently finish reading?  Keep Your Friends Close by Paula Daly. This is a trashy summer read. But it August, so that makes it the perfect time to pick it up. It's got secrets and betrayal and sex and even a cat in peril (SPOILER: Morris is fine at the end; I share that for readers like me who get so distracted when critters are involved in the plot). This book is not art. The plot doesn't bear up under close scrutiny. But it is a page-turner.

• What do you think you’ll read next? I don't know. I've got an Agatha Christie and a Linda Fairstein beckoning me.

To see how others responded, click here.

Feelin' Weirdly

Back in 1967, Simon & Garfunkle recorded "The 59th Street Bridge Song," better known as "Feelin' Groovy." It's been running through my mind because my day was perversely not groovy.

I went back to work today. I'm still not feeling strong, but I had to go back sometime. And there was absolutely nothing going on. Not a damn thing. The only email I had to answer was why I wasn't making a change. It was OK. I mean, better not to be overwhelmed. But the total lack of work was spooky. No one else seems concerned. Our client is going through a massive reorganization on their end and they have to get it together on their end before they can give us assignments. I get that. It just felt ... weird.

I heard from Cousin Rose. She's coming to Chicagoland in a few weeks and is not staying with me because I lied to her. I told her my bathroom will be under renovation and that's simply not true. I don't want her here. She would make me crazy. Also, my place is filthy and I wouldn't be able to get it together in time. It's better this way, but I feel guilty about it because I know she loves me and because she enjoyed having me stay with her last autumn, even though I found it awkward. I assumed she was going to bunk with her cousin on her dad's side, who lives somewhere in the city proper.

Here's the kicker: Rose is going to stay at a motel. She wrote me that she just cannot deal with that other cousin's peculiarities. (Specifically, but limited to, not having clothes washed with scented laundry detergent or fabric softener in her home.) So I guess Rose loves but is annoyed by her cousin, the way Rose is loved by yet annoys me. This feels weirdly like an O. Henry short story.

I heard from aunt. Her husband had his gall bladder removed. There was no reason to suspect this was serious, but she loves her hubby and was anxious about it. I sent her the trashy novel I just finished and a card for him. It meant a great a deal to her and that made me happy. I shot my kid sister a Facebook message, mentioning the surgery, in case she wanted to shoot our aunt a message. I heard nothing back. Is she upset that my aunt didn't tell her about the surgery? Is the mad at me again over something? Facebook can make things so fucking complicated. Family can be so fucking weird.

Reynaldo. My cat is a skinny beige freak. He's been on a destructive tear again. And the thing of it is, young Connie wants to play with him. But no, he wants my attention and will do whatever he can to get it. As my vet explained a little over a year ago, this cat is "unusually bonded" to me. Sigh. Weird.

Yours in a world of weirdness,

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 5

Today's happiness --Trader Joe's Mini Mouthfuls. Imagine an Oreo filled with mint chocolate chip ice cream. I love these little guys and had two after dinner. 240 calories is not bad for dessert and they make me happy.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 4

 
Today's happiness -- TCM Summer Under the Stars. I was going to go to work today. I got up with the alarm, took my shower … and fell asleep on the sofa. That's how I knew today just wasn't happening. I've been so sleepy and weak that I didn't even manage to get dressed until 6:00 this evening.

Which isn't to say today has been without happy. For it's Judy Garland Day on Turner Classic Movies! Garland is staggeringly talented. Yes, she could sing. Of course she could sing. But she was such a naturally gifted actress. No one cried like Judy. And she could dance, as illustrated by this charming TCM promo.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 3

Today's happiness -- $8. I purchased two (two!) tickets for the Illinois State Lottery last month and just discovered today that they were winners: one for $6, one for $2. I spent this princely sum all in one place, right there in the convenience store where I cashed them in. I got Kleenex, orange juice, Coke and an ice cream bar. (Ice cream feels good on my scratchy throat.)

People can surprise you

I had lunch today with Joanna, one of the women I met through my classic film Meetup. She's so bright and accomplished that I'm surprised she requested my help. But she did. She wants me to help her develop the marketing materials she needs to get her new consultancy business off the ground.

I'll fiddle with what she gave me, and I'll look at the additional information she's promised to send along, and I'll give it some organization and direction. Then I'm confident she'll take it from there. I mean, she's sooooo smart and so versatile, able to bounce conversationally from business building to economics to marketing! She can do this on her own! I think she's just stuck.

I promised her we would be able to come up with a flexible, durable positioning statement for her new business and she seemed so relieved. Since I'm doing it for free, she's promised to be buy me lunches "forever." She said she thanks "the universe" for bringing her what she needed ... meaning me, who she encountered most unexpectedly while watching old movies.

I'm happy to help her. I mean, this is, after all, what I do. And getting out and meeting her downtown was good for me -- otherwise I would have just stayed on the sofa, nursing this cold.

But it was a little rattling to see someone who is usually so together, who has so much going for her, appear so vulnerable and unsure. I am forever surprised by how different a person's life can look from the outside from the way it feels on the inside.

Sunday Stealing

Fun Fifteen  
 

1. You have been awarded the time off from work and an all-expenses paid week anywhere in the United States. The catch is that it must be somewhere you have not been before. Where do you choose to visit? This is a great question! I landed on the Lake Austin Spa. I've been to Texas, but only Dallas, never Austin. Since someone else is paying, I could stay in my own little cabin with my own personal whirlpool. I'd walk the gardens and bike the hills and spend hours upon hours in the spa.

 2. Name your guilty pleasures. Right now my guiltiest pleasure is doing nothing. I'm battling a cold and have literally done nothing today. And I'm good with that.

 3. The best kind of milkshake is: Chocolate

 4. What do you value most in other people? A good sense of humor

 5. Be honest. Do you sneak some raw cookie dough when you’re baking cookies? Yes

 6. Have you ever looked back at your life and realized that something you thought was a bad thing was actually a blessing in disguise? A very bad romantic breakup turned out to be a very good thing. I shudder to think of what my life would be like if I'd stayed with him.

 7. What is the most beautiful place you have ever visited? Washington DC at night took my breath away.

 8. Are you more of a thinker or a feeler? Feeler

 9. Name three things you are thankful for right now. 1) That I got everything I needed to do done on Friday so I could spend Saturday recuperating from this cold; 2) That I'm independent and am free to baby myself like this when I have a cold; 3) The internet and cable keep me in touch with the world without my moving my cold-plagued ass from this sofa.

 10. Have you ever participated in a three-legged race? When I was in Girl Scouts, about 200 years ago

 11. When you are at an event that plays the National Anthem, do you place your hand over your heart? Yes

 12. Have you ever been on the wrong side of the law? No

 13. When was the last time you unintentionally surprised someone else? At the reception area at work. The doors are heavily frosted and I opened it just as someone on the other side was reaching for it. Yeah, I know it's boring, but it's true.

 14. When was the last time you deliberately surprised someone else? Nothing comes to mind. Sorry.

 15. What was the last really funny movie you watched? I watched Meatballs twice last week when I was hanging around, waiting for the Cute Handyman to install the new lighting and medicine chest in my bathroom.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 2

Today's happiness: Gray and white cats. I feel crappy. My chest feels tight when I cough, my nose is stuffed up and my head hurts. I'm way too sleepy and lightheaded to twirl. The fact that it's a sunny summer Saturday makes it all the more painful!

That's why I'm so grateful for these two: Giant Joe and little Connie. They have taken turns cuddling with me all day.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: My Life


1) This song begins with the story of a man who moved to Los Angeles to pursue a career as a comic. What comedian always makes you laugh? Stephen Colbert. He's really brilliant. I know he's going to change when he takes over for Dave next year, and I'm ambivalent. On the one hand, I'm eager to see how much he can do. On the other hand, to borrow from Billy Joel, I love him just the way he is.

2) The lyrics say, "You don't need to worry about me 'cause I'm alright." Tell us about a time when you had to reassure your family or friends. In 2011, during those long weeks between being told I needed surgery and actually having it. Yes, I was scared that I may have cancer (thank God I didn't!) but talking about it wasn't making me feel any better.

3) This song was the original theme of the Tom Hanks sitcom Bosom Buddies. Tom Hanks is a direct descendant of Nancy Hanks, Abraham Lincoln's mother. Is there anyone noteworthy, celebrated or infamous in your family tree? Nope.

4) Before going solo, Billy Joel was in bands called The Echoes, The Emeralds, The Hassles and Attila. What do you think would be a good name for a band? Channel D. It's a catchphrase from The Man from UNCLE.
 

5) Billy Joel wrote one of his most famous songs, "Just the Way You Are," for his first wife, Elizabeth. Even though they divorced more than 30 years ago, fans still demand he perform the song in concert. Do you go out of your way to listen to songs that remind you of a long-ago lost love? Or do you avoid them? I avoid them. They make me sad.

6) In 2008 Billy Joel had to return a $3,000,000 advance for his memoirs because he didn't finish them. Have you ever read a celebrity tell-all?  I read Tatum O'Neal's memoir, Found: A Daughter's Journey Home, and found it very moving. She's been through a great deal and on a very grand scale.

7) Billy Joel was in a motorcycle accident and did irreparable damage to his left thumb. Are you comfortable on a motorcycle? Nope.

8) In addition to riding cycles, Billy enjoys sailing in Oyster Bay. Do your summer plans include time on a boat? Nope. This meme is making me sound very dull, isn't it?

9) Billy Joel is a popular college commencement speaker. If you were asked advice from the Class of 2014, what would you say?  As the flight attendants say, “Make sure to put the oxygen mask on yourself first before attempting to help someone else put on theirs.” You can't perform at your best if you're run down, physically or spiritually or emotionally, so be sure to always include some "me time" in your life.

August Happiness Challenge -- Day 1

Today's happiness: The Village Book Fair. I'm so glad that I live in a village of book lovers, where the library has three branches, and the annual fundraiser is an event that has people lined up around the block.

It always offers such great values, too. This year my find was a gift for my friend Kathleen, a scholarly, out of print history of The Chicago Tribune. (She used to work there and that's where her heart remains.) Just $2! As was my hardcover copy of the well-reviewed Sinatra biography, The Voice. I also grabbed an Agatha Christie (I've never read Miss Marple) and a Linda Fairstein. Total? $6 and change!

Another thing I enjoy about the book fair is seeing which book is so over. There's one every year -- the book my neighbors bought in big numbers and then decided, seemingly at all once, to discard.

In 2006, it was The Corrections.
In 2007, The Nanny Diaries.
In 2008, The Da Vinci Code.
In 2009, My Life by Bill Clinton.
In 2010, Scarlett, the Sequel to Margaret Mitchell's Gone with The Wind.
In 2011, The Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood.
In 2012, Sixkill by Robert B. Parker (a Spenser mystery)
In 2013, The Da Vinci Code all over again.
In 2014, it's The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.

I guess in New York they're kept in pens

My day got off to a bad start. I don't think my cold is a cold, I think it's something worse. I was so weak I actually fell asleep in the bathtub. I knew we weren't going to be busy at work and I was tempted to call in sick, but I've been covering for Phil this week. I didn't get out the door until after 9:00 AM.

A very thin older lady with a big totebag and a map approached me in front of the el. She asked if I was from around here. Lady, I've lived in this town for more than 25 years. You've brought your tourist questions to the right place!

First she asked where my church was. Not because she wanted to worship, but because it's a historic landmark and architectural gem. She complained that she didn't want to tour it, just walk around and wondered it it's always open. I explained that since it's my church, when I go it's for Sunday services so of course it's open -- I can't vouch for Friday morning. Then she asked me about some of the other historic houses. I showed her on the map how to get there.

Then she strangely asked me where "all the people are." I explained that this is a residential area and everyone is at work at 9:15. She went on to say that in New York, the sidewalks are always full. "But this isn't Chicago," said I, explaining that we're a neighboring village. (As printed on the map in her hand. Duh.)

Then she said that the only people she on the train and on the streets this morning were (lowers voice), "black teenagers."

"That's it," I said. "I'm not listening to this." If only the light hadn't just turned yellow I could have swept away.

"I'm not being racist," she said.

"Yes, you are, and I'm not listening to it," I said, crossing against the light as soon as the oncoming traffic past.

"I'm not being racist," she called after me.

"Have a nice day," I said, and kept going.

I wish I'd asked her where they keep the black teenagers in New York. I wish I'd told her that when she visited my church, she should look at her soul. I wish I'd asked her why her skin looks like bad luggage when I know they sell sunscreen in New York.

This is 2014, for pity's sake! I don't want people like her in my village. 

Meet Twirl Girl

I love her freedom and independence, how everyone else is focused on something in the other direction but here she is, moving to her own drummer.

She's my icon for the 2014 August Happiness Challenge. What's that you say? What's the August Happiness Challenge?

Each day in August you are to post about something that makes *you* happy. Pretty simple. And, it doesn't even have to be every day if you don't want it to be. It's a great way to remind ourselves that there are positive things going on in our lives, our communities, and the world.

If you want to play along, just come back here (meaning to this blog, not this individual post) each day in August, looking for Twirl Girl. Every day I will try to have a post with the headline: August Happiness Challenge: Day [X]. Leave a comment and then post your own daily happiness, with August Happiness Challenge in the title to make it easy to find.

Of course you're encouraged to visit the other Happiness participants, but it's not mandatory. And if I miss a day because I'm away from the keyboard, feel free to post on your own and visit other bloggers without me.

Twirl Girl and I aren't much for rules. The motivation behind the August Happiness Challenge is simply to give us each a moment to reflect on the positive things in our lives.

So simply think of it as a pleasant little blogging prompt, not a challenge to be conquered. That's the way I've been doing it every year -- without agita -- since 2007. And that's the way I'm going to continue. Because it makes me happy.

NOT happy!

Looks like I'm entering August and the Happiness Challenge with a cold. I'm sneezing and my throat is scratchy. DAMMIT!

Image: tigger11th / FreeDigitalPhotos.net