Nine months

I just ran the numbers. If I get let go this month, I should receive two months severance and I have 7 months' worth of expenses put away. That means I will be "good" for 9 months without another job.

Of course, I have no confidence I'll find another job in 9 months. My best friend has been unemployed since August, 2012. My friend John has been without a regular, full time gig since June, 2012. Marketing and advertising are tough right now.

But there's only so much I can do about that this morning. One way to keep my job is to go into the office this fine Monday morning, right?

Feeling weepy

I'm not much a crier. But I cried today when it washed over me how much I miss my uncle, and how much he gave me.

It was 50 years ago today. I was six. For some reason the clan had gathered at my Icky Grandma's house. I was getting bored and fidgety. My uncle suddenly rescued me from certain scolding by inviting me to join him on an errand. We ended up at Korvette's department store -- one of the few that were open on Sunday. I don't remember what we came for, but before we got in line to pay he was distracted by a group of young people. (He was, after all, just 21 at the time.) They were surrounding a card table. He guided me over there and we checked it out, leavng with a record for 99¢ and a free balloon. The record was "Love Me Do/P.S. I Love You" and the balloon featured a pictured of these four young men that none of us had ever seen before. We returned to Icky Grandma's and, as the family gathering broke up, he reminded me watch The Ed Sullivan Show that night so I could see what all the fuss was about.

The rest, as they say, is history.

If you read this blog at all, you know that I am a massive Beatle fan. He gave me that, and few things gave me as much enduring joy as The Beatles. But that's just one thing I am grateful to my uncle for. I remember him as always bringing fun and magic with him.

I do not believe in revising history. My uncle was not a perfect man. Frequently, he wasn't even a nice one. But he was always, ALWAYS good to me. He was my godfather and he felt a connection to me. This story, that began when he got me out of that house before I could get another stern talking to lecture just for behaving like a child, was a good indication. For my Icky Grandma was his mother, and he knew how soul crushing she could be.

He should be alive today. He should be on the other end of the phone as I call him at this hour (7:00 on Sunday night) and thank him for giving me the Lads, and everything else he gave me. Instead, his life was cut cruelly short by Parkinson's. Because his condition was no doubt exacerbated by service in the Army and his exposure to Agent Orange, and I am very, very angry right now.

I take some comfort in knowing I thanked him in life, and that from his unique vantage point in heaven, he knows how fondly he's remembered right now.

Where did today go?

Got up. Attended church. Shopped at Petco and picked up an egg-and-cheddar bagel on the way back. Laid down on the couch for a minute and ... SHIT! IT'S AFTER 4:00! MY SUNDAY IS GONE!

Sunday Stealing

To play along, click here.


1.)Do you like Valentine's Day?  Not especially.

2.)Are you going to celebrate it? Not especially.

3.)Celebrate Valentine's Day with friends or someone special?  No

4.)Pink or red? Whichever is brighter. I'm not big on pastels.

5.)Candy Hearts OR cards? Are we talking a heart filled with chocolate candy? Or those "be mine" sweethearts. If it's chocolate, I'll go with those. Otherwise, I'd like a nice, old-school Valentine with cupid on the front.

6.)A short kiss or a big hug? Depends on who is doing the kissing/hugging.

7.)What are your plans for V-day?  Budgeting for payday and preparing my tax paperwork for the accountant.
 
8.)What would be the best gift to receive? Sex. 

9.)Would get back with any of your ex's for V-day? In a weak moment.

10.)Is there a food or beverage you associate with V-day? No

11.) What are your thoughts on "Love at first sight?" I believe in connection/attraction at first sight, but not love.

12.)Do you think people who have dated can stay friends? I have never seen it first hand.

13.) If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating or relationships what would it be? Don't excuse bad behavior by saying, "Aw, he doesn't mean it." Trust your 2014 self, Gal. He did mean it.

It's time they were vanquished!

My cat Charlotte is behaving much more like her old self. Not only is she eating often and enthusiastically, she tracked down and killed her fuzzy mice. Finishing off the gray one required special care but she was up to the task.

She's still not out of the woods. Getting food and fluids into her was just the first, most critical step in getting her well. Her hypothyroidism is still slowly killing her. She's still down to barely 5 lbs. While her eyes are no longer watery, the pupils are still dilated and that's a sign of high blood pressure. Once she stronger, we have to get her back on her thyroid meds.

She's at least 14 years old, perhaps as old as 17. I realize she may be reaching the end of her feline life. I'm not trying to keep her alive at any cost. That would be selfish. But I am devoted to keeping her as comfortable and happy as I can for the time she has. That's the deal I bought when I adopted her.

31 Days of Oscar Blogathon -- Actors

In Praise of Practical Magic

April 5, 1965. ABC pre-empted the hospital drama Ben Casey for the Academy Awards and TV viewers got to see Julie Andrews graciously accept sublime revenge on Jack Warner.

Studio boss Warner famously passed on Julie for the lead in My Fair Lady. Never mind that she created the role of Eliza on Broadway and played it successfully for hundreds of performances. According to various reports, Warner said she wasn't glamorous enough for the big screen … or not "right" for middle America … or not powerful enough a talent to ensure box office success.

The lady herself admits she was hurt and upset at the time. Who wants to be told that she's not pretty enough, not good enough? Also, she was justifiably proud of her carefully crafted Eliza and would have liked to have seen that performance preserved on film.

Fortunately, the people at Walt Disney Studios had complete faith that she would play in middle America and invited her to accept the lead in their big budget, live action extravaganza, Mary Poppins. The result was literally Oscar gold, while Warner's Fair Lady Audrey Hepburn wasn't even nominated.

Some Oscar experts opine that the award was less about Julie and more a swipe at the very unpopular Jack Warner. Today Carrie Fisher makes fun of Julie's award, saying she can't believe her mother, Debbie Reynolds, lost her Unsinkable Molly Brown Oscar to Mary Poppins. But I think Julie Andrews is a wonder in her first film role and this award was completely deserved on its merits.

From the moment she descends upon Cherry Tree Lane, Julie's Mary Poppins commands attention, admiration and respect. She virtually hires herself, and Mr. Banks is helpless in the face of her common sense, confidence and efficiency. She introduces herself to the children, bringing order and rules into their lives so that they will be prepared for adulthood. She also makes sure Jane and Michael get a lot of music and magic.

It's a neat balancing act. Yes, the Banks children get to dive into chalk paintings, participate in a fox hunt and derby while riding carousel horses, and take their afternoon tea on the ceiling. But they also have to keep the nursery neat and clean, take their tonic each morning, mind their manners and go to sleep on time. She's as firm as she is fun. She takes the screen with such authority it's hard to believe this is Julie Andrews' first time before a film camera.

Maybe Warner was right and the camera doesn't love Julie the way it does the always luminous Audrey. But it certainly was charmed by her. With her clear skin and bright eyes, she is a pleasant, comfortable screen presence.

Then there are the musical numbers. Like everything else about her performance, her voice is both beautiful and exquisitely controlled. Its inherent warmth helps keep Mary from seeming officious. So does her chemistry with Dick Van Dyke, especially in three of their most memorable scenes -- "Jolly Holiday," "Chim Chim Cher-ree," and "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious." Their eye contact is constant as they regard one another's dance moves with interest and affection.

Julie followed Mary Poppins by doing the impossible -- making an even more commercially successful film. The Sound of Music is still a veritable cash register, bringing in continuous and awe-inspiring revenue from DVD sales, soundtrack sales, audience-participation sing-alongs and regular showings on TV. But Julie's performance as Mary Poppins is better than her Maria Von Trapp. More layered, more unexpected, more interesting. It's ironic that the more complex characterization is a magic, fictional nanny rather than a real woman who fled Nazis, but such are the vagaries of movie musicals.

Want more Oscar? 

From Feb 1 to March 1 you can discover 

a month's worth of posts by visiting 

Paula's Cinema Club,  

Once Upon a Screen and Outspoken and Freckled.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Why Don't We Get Drunk?

Unfamiliar with this week's song? Hear it here.

1)This week's song was once named the favorite love song of Bud Wiser, the godfather to this humble blog. With Valentine's Day coming up, what's your favorite love song? "All My Loving." It was 50 years ago this weekend that Paul looked into the camera and sang, "Close your eyes and I'll kiss you/tomorrow I'll miss you/remember I'll always be true." A sweet, innocent sentiment sung by a dark-eyed troubadour. Sigh.

2) When this song was first released back in 1973, the "Why don't we get drunk and screw?" refrain was considered shocking. With the explicit sexual content in many of today's songs, it now hardly raises an eyebrow. When is the last time you were shocked? (Not just by a song, by anything at all.) I was saddened by the death of Philip Seymour Hoffman, and shocked by the circumstances surrounding it.

3) Buffett named his first daughter Savannah, presumably after his favorite city. Tell us about your favorite city. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Chicago. It's an ethnically diverse and easily walkable city. We have great restaurants, world-class museums and breathtaking architecture. There's no better place to shop than Michigan Avenue.  We have profesional basketball, hockey, football, soccer and, of course, baseball! Opening Day at Wrigley Field is Friday, April 4.

It begins again in 59 days!

4) Mr. Buffett opened a Margaritaville Casino in Atlantic City. Have you ever gambled in Atlantic City? What about Las Vegas? No and yes.

5) Saving Florida's manatees is a cause near and dear to Jimmy Buffett's heart. If we were to make a $100 contribution to any charity in your honor, which would you choose?  Toys for Tots. Every kid should have a merry Christmas.

6) If today was your birthday, your astrological sign would be Aquarius. How often do you check your horoscope?  Seldom if ever.

7) On this date in 1974, the show Good Times ("Dy-no-mite!") premiered and, much to Sam's confusion and chagrin, still enjoys an audience in syndication. Tell us about a pop culture phenomenon that you just never got into. Seinfeld.

8) Is there a home improvement project on your list of things to do? It's my plan to devote my tax refund to redoing my bathroom.

9) A warm-weather choice to consider on a February day: Ice cream sundae or banana split? Hot fudge sundae with nuts. Yum!

A mixed bag

Today Charlotte and I went to the vet. She was down to 5 lbs.! To put this in perspective, a year ago she weighed just over 7 lbs., so in the last 12 months she's lost 28% of her body weight!

The vet doesn't know what set her on this recent downward spiral and, frankly, he right now, he doesn't care. He looked at her pre-op bloodwork from last month and didn't see anything out of the ordinary except her thyroid. So he guesses that whatever is bedeviling her right now wouldn't have such a drastic impact if she hadn't been weakened by the hypothyroidism and weight loss.

So she got some intravenous fluids and an appetite stimulant. And boy, did that do the trick! She snarfed down the new, super rich "critical care" food the vet sent home with us. She also enjoyed some crunchy cat treats and licked my plate clean. The only thing she's not interested in is her standard kibble. Hopefully by Sunday or Monday, she'll be back to her old self.

And then she'll go back to the vet. He was worried that her blood pressure was elevated. Hopefully by her next visit either he will tell me it's back within the normal range, or he can figure out what's causing it to rise.

She hates going to the vet. I hate taking her. It's expensive and traumatic. So I hope we're almost done with this!

My aging feline population is expensive

Right now at work we have three people doing the work of two. This is not good. I wouldn't be surprised if the axe falls on one of us before February is over.

I found out, quite by accident, that although I've been there the longest of the three, I make the least.

$7,000 less than my officemate (hired in 2007), and approximately $11,000 less than the newest addition to the team (hired 2012).

I always knew that when I joined this agency back in 2004, I didn't drive a hard enough bargain. I took vacation time instead of salary and assumed that I'd get raises every year/18 months. Then the Recession happened. In 9 years I've gotten one raise. My coworkers/competitors simply negotiated better deals.

Making less than the boys may just work out in my favor. For I have more experience and I'm more cost efficient.

Which is good because I have two cats with medical problems. Reynaldo is on a special diet for life, and Charlotte is going to the vet again Friday.

I remain very worried.

I got her to purr!

So Monday when I got home from work, I found my diva cat Charlotte lethargic, hiding and refusing food and water. Tuesday morning found her a wee bit more social. On Tuesday night, I whipped out that jar of Gerber 2nd Meats I keep on hand for just this occasion.

ATTENTION, PET OWNERS -- Dogs and cats alike are in love with the scent of Gerber 2nd Meats and will eat it, no matter what. They don't provide much in terms of feline/canine nutrition, but are rich in moisture and can help you fend off dehydration. Also, a dog will snarf down a pill the size of a football if it smells like Gerber 2nd Meats.

Miss Thing was feeling friendly enough toward me to sleep on the foot of my bed Tuesday night.

Today she's still not eating or drinking, but she did lap up more of the Gerber and she's beside me on the sofa, purring!

We're going to the vet Friday afternoon. But I'm feeling more confident about her prognosis. The lack of appetite and constipation/dehydration could be a reaction to her thyroid medicine.

God, You're Dumb

Remember Archie Bunker? He's the grumpy old man by oldest friend had been crushing on. I still cyber stalk him because I want to be 100% sure she's not circling back to him. (For all that he's a toxic douchebag, she's attracted to his eyes, smile and minor celebrity as a retired sportscaster.)

Anyway, today he's ranting over Facebook as "Big Brother" because of those "look back" anniversary films they've put together for us. Who are THEY to take HIS information and put together a video?

Um, Arch? THEY are the ones who own your information because when you posted it, you gave it to them. 

My poor girl

Right now, my cat Charlotte is asleep under the futon. She doesn't want food, she doesn't want attention. She wants to be left alone.

I don't know what to do. I fear she's having a bad reaction to the meds I've been giving her each morning for her thyroid condition. But I am resistant to take her to the vet. She hates it so much, it terrifies her so. She's old, she's weak. I'm not sure it's right to subject her to that.

But if I don't take her, then what? Sleeping by herself under the sofa, without the interest in food or friendship she had just yesterday, is no way to live.

My poor girl. I hope she knows how much she is loved, and how hard I am trying to decide what's best for her.

The Killing Season

History teaches us that, if there are going to be lay offs, they will likely be on Tuesday, February 18. And I am worried.

Our client's fiscal year runs from February to February, and there are signs that they want to spend less with us. One are that I know about is travel expenses. Other areas, that I don't know about, could include our salaries.

My little creative team, which includes four of us in a single, over-sized office, just found out on Monday that we're being moved to an even smaller clown car ... I mean office. I'm not only unhappy about this because I hate the lack of privacy, but because of what I'm afraid it represents in terms of our value to this agency.

It occurs to me, too, that we were supposed to initiate performance appraisals in January. Well, January has come and gone and there was no additional word on the topic. And there wouldn't be ... if a blood bath was on the way.

I am worried. I am scared.

Image courtesy of Ambro/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

"How do you do?"

So began the first message from my "secret pal."

She's a child -- a girl, I think -- who goes to my church. She's between the ages of 5 and 15, younger rather than older. She drew me a picture of a cat and gave me a snowflake eraser as a present.

Every Sunday this month, we're going to exchange messages in a bucket before the service. Then, on the 23rd, our identities will be revealed and we will meet face-to-face at a party.

I only signed up to do this because a couple weeks ago, there was a notice in the bulletin that there were more kids than adults signed up for the program this year. I hated the thought of a child reaching out and no one reaching back. Plus, that week was devoted to Dr. King and the subject was service, so ... Right after I volunteered, I was hoping they'd tell me they didn't need me, after all.

But then this morning I saw her messily printed, "How do you do?" and received her little present and the drawing she did because I said in my profile that I like cats. And I was touched.

Whoever she is, I'm glad she's my pal.

Sunday Stealing

SUNDAY STEALING

To play along, click here.

Put your music player of choice on shuffle and list the first song "That's Life" by Frank Sinatra

If you could spend a week anywhere in the world, where would it be and why? Would you take anyone with you? Casa Del Mar in Santa Monica. I wouldn't take anyone with me because I really enjoy my alone time. But my oldest friend lives nearby.

What is your preferred writing implement? (eg. Blue pen, pencil, green pen) A very sharp pencil

When did you go on your first trip alone (without your parents)? When I was 16, my cousin and I flew to Ft. Lauderdale to visit her dad, my favorite uncle. It was my first flight.

Do you have connections to any celebrities (even minor)? List them. I can't think of anyone.

Name 3 items you could pick up from where you are. My cat, Rey. My cat, Joe (though it would take two hands to lift him.) Thermometer (I have a cold).

How would you describe your sense of humor? Robust.

Do you ever play board games or other non-computer games? Got any favorites? Scrabble.

A musical artist you love that isn’t well known. Marcia Ball, a blues pianist my best friend turned me on to.

A musical artist you love that is well known. Paul McCartney. Perhaps you've heard of him. Plays bass for a band who appeared on The Ed Sullivan Show 50 years ago next week.

What is your desktop background currently? 

 

These two photos take turns on my desktop, revolving from one into the other, telling the story of the day in the life of Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy Onassis that provides just one example why I admire her so.

These photos were taken the same afternoon, moments apart, in autumn, 1971. The photographer who took the first shot and appears in the second shot is Ron Gallela. He hounded Jackie on a daily basis, dressing up as Santa Claus to shoot her while shopping at Christmastime, hiding in coat racks for photos of her dining and sometimes even smoking (gasp!) with friends, chasing her in a speed boat while she water skied, following her into movie theaters, etc. When her children were young they still had Secret Service protection and she would ask the agents to, "Please smash his camera," and usually they would. It got so bad that in 1972, just months after this incident, she actually took him to court and got a restraining order. I often wonder what would have happened if Princess Diana had been as ballsy as JBKO; perhaps she'd still be with us.

Anyway, Jackie was running a quick errand, crossing Fifth Avenue in front of her apartment building, when Galella sidled up near her and called her name. She reflexively turned and smiled. When she saw who it was, and that this time he had an accomplice with a camera, she simply slipped the dark glasses on (thereby making the subsequent photos he shot worth a little less), kept her face impassive and kept going.

She hated Galella. He was a stalker and he frightened and enraged her. Yet look at her control. Sure, she could have lost her temper with him (Marlon Brando literally punched his teeth out), but that would have given Galella a front-page shot he could have retired on. So she just withdrew into herself and kept going.

I wear my heart on my sleeve. I have a difficult time with my temper, which often hurts no one else as much as it does me.

I hope if I gaze at her long enough and remember the story, some of it will rub off on me. "Remember, Gal, just put on your sunglasses and keep going."

Last person you talked to, and through what you talked to them. The pharmacist. Face-to-face.

What do you carry your money in? A wallet.

What timekeeping devices are in the room you are currently in? My watch and the time display on the upper right hand of my computer.

What kind of headphones do you use? Behind the neck.

What musical artists have you seen perform live? Paul McCartney, Bruce Springsteen, Jimmy Buffett, Barbra Streisand, Chicago, The Beach Boys, Diana Ross, David Bowie ... I'm a pretty typical Baby Boomer, aren't I?

How often do you clear your browser history? I don't think about it.

What’s the best job you’ve ever had? I wrote packaging and promotional materials for new products for a haircare company. It was a lot of fun.

What’s the worst job you’ve ever had? Secretary to an officious prick.

What magazines do you read, if any? Time, People, Allure, More, O and Glamour.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: I Gotta Feeling 

Unfamiliar with this week's song? Hear it here.

1) What would make tonight a good, good night? Pizza. I have a hankering for gooey, cheesey pizza.

 2) In the song, he sings that he's got money and wants to "spend it up." How

much cash is in your wallet right now? $65 and change. I just went to the ATM yesterday to get the $60.

 3) The lyrics include "mazel tov," which means good luck or congratulations. What other Hebrew/Yiddish phrases do you know? Meshuganah, ma nishtana, tschotze (and according to spell check, I got them all wrong)

4) The colorfully named Black Eyed Peas include Fergie (born Stacey Ferguson) and will.i.am (William Adams) and Taboo (Jaime Gomez). If you could choose a stage name, what would it be? Julie Andrews or Jennifer Lawrence. Yes, I know they're taken already. But I'd  choose a name that's easy to remember and impossible to mispronounce.

5) This song was crazy popular in Canada, debuting at #2 on the charts. Have you ever visited our neighbor to the north? Once as a child, once decades later.

6) When's the last time you laughed really hard? I don't remember the "when" but I'm sure the "who" was my oldest friend. We crack each other up.
 
7) Who received the last text you sent? Friend/former coworker Tom.

8) Which sounds like more fun -- skiing or skating? Skiing, though I'd be bad at both.

9) Thinking of sports, are you looking forward to The Super Bowl? Not enough to actually watch it. I'll find out who won and see highlights of Bruno's performance over and over again on Monday. And, since I work in advertising, watching/analyzing the commercials feels like work.

Sometimes people surprise you

One of my coworkers can be difficult -- distracted and lazy. And yet today she did something so very kind and responsible! She's picking up the slack on the project that's due eod Monday so that I can stay home in bed tomorrow.

It's an important phase of our big project. I should be well by Monday and there to supervise the final steps before release. But it's such a relief to know I can stay home again tomorrow and nurse this cold without worrying.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

To play along, just answer the following three questions ...

• What are you currently reading?  Bruce, by Peter Ames Carlin. It's not an authorized biography, though the Springsteen camp has certainly participated. I love how The Boss recalls discovering The King. Springsteen was in first grade, watching The Ed Sullivan Show hoping to see the puppets and jugglers, but instead he was transfixed by Elvis: "A child wants nothing but to upset the world … sort of like tearing your house apart and reconfiguring it according to your dreams and your imagination. This man was doing that."

• What did you recently finish reading? Killing the Blues by Michael Brandman. It was an engaging little thriller. Not high art, but it held my attention. I just wish the tension didn't involve a community terrorized by dog killings. I hate pets in peril.

• What do you think you’ll read next? Ya got me! We'll see how I feel after Bruce.

To see how others responded, click here.

P.S. I changed the photo because 1) I like the idea of a 60-year-old Jackie, barefoot and turban-toweled, lounging on the hood of a car, and still looking glam and 2) I have a bad cold and it helps to think of warmer days.

All I do is sniff. Pass that handerkerchief.

I'm too bleary to think. I'm too congested to sleep. I have a bad cold. I know that's all it is because I don't have a fever.

The bad thing about working in a clown car (or "open floorplan") is that I'm sitting on top of three other people all day long, with three more within a matter of yards. I hate that with every cough and sneeze I'm spreading germs, unfettered by walls.

I feel like the responsible thing to do would be to stay home, but I have a 3:45 Wednesday conference call. Rescheduled from 3:45 Tuesday. I'm going in late tomorrow -- I'll be in by noon, just in case something else comes up regarding the project -- and I'll leave as soon as it's over.

I wonder if the money businesses save on rent with open floor plans is lost in reduced productivity during cold and flu season.

31 Days of Oscar Blogathon -- Oscar Snubs

Richard Burton's Bad Luck with

 Drunk Cowboys 

Tuesday, April 7, 1970, is a milestone in Hollywood history. For it marked the beginning of the end of one of show business' most fabled unions: Taylor and Burton, Liz and Dick. It was the night that Richard Burton lost the Best Actor Oscar to John Wayne.

Burton was sure his sixth nomination for Anne of the Thousand Days would be his last. Hollywood was changing. Instead of glossy, big budget films like the ones he and Taylor headlined, the public was now flocking to smaller, modern movies like The Graduate, Bonnie and Clyde and Midnight Cowboy. He realized that he and Elizabeth were becoming passe. This was his chance to finally win an Oscar, and he wanted it badly.

According to columnist Liz Smith, J. Randy Taraborelli's biography Elizabeth and the wonderful Furious Love by Sam Kashner and Nancy Schoenberger, it bothered Richard Burton enormously that his wife had two Oscars and he had none.

It wasn't that Burton felt he was more talented than his wife. Quite the contrary. He always said Elizabeth was "the greatest cinematic technician ever" and that she taught him how to act for the camera. 

It was that, for all his natural gifts and hard-won success, he was tormented by the choices he'd made. He turned his back on his father -- Richard Jenkins -- and took the name of his guardian and mentor, Philip Burton, because Philip could help him escape Pontrhydyfen, the poor mining community of his youth. Then he left his loyal wife, Sybil, and two daughters because he wanted to possess the most famous woman in the world. 

He felt guilty about what he called "le scandal," the chaos his relationship with Taylor caused. The jewels and furs, the private planes and yachts, the boozing and brawling. The excesses of "The Liz and Dick Show" kept him from Shakespeare and the stage work that once seemed his destiny. He had been touted as the heir to Olivier, Gielgud and Richardson. He had greater fame and riches than Larry, John or Ralph, but he hadn't been knighted. 

Burton believed that an Oscar would be tangible evidence that it all had been worth it. By 1970, he was sick and tired. Literally. At 45, he was suffering from liver damage and arthritis. He was deeply disappointed in the scripts he was being offered. He dreamed of retiring after he won the gold statuette. He had recently received an informal offer to lecture at Oxford, and believed that once he won an Oscar he could walk away from acting and try for a more discreet and sober life. 

He and Taylor were having marital difficulties. Since their world-famous love affair had begun in Rome eight years before, "Liz and Dick" had received unprecedented scrutiny from the world press. Now they were experiencing pressure within the film industry, too. Except for Anne of the Thousand Days, their recent movies had been flops. And as they moved into middle age, they had to cope with the universal and inescapable heartbreak of aging loved ones. In the spring of 1970 they were still reeling from the sudden death of Taylor's father, Francis, and the paralysis of Burton's idolized older brother, Ifor Jenkins, who suffered a broken neck at their home in Celigny. In the isolation and stress, they turned on one another.

So Elizabeth, too, hoped that if he had the Oscar he wanted so desperately their lives would improve. She gamely launched a campaign to win him the award. She'd been working since childhood and had a lot of friends in the movie industry. She believed that if she and Burton could present a united front and cooperate with the Hollywood establishment, he could win an Oscar of his own to accompany her two.

She began by trying (not altogether successfully) to curtail her own prodigious drinking in support of her husband, who was on the wagon for the first time since he starred in Camelot on Broadway back in 1961. Then she came home, moving her family from Europe back to Bel Air for awards season. She made herself available for interviews, including one with Burton that aired on 60 Minutes. She reached out to the Academy, letting them know she would be happy to participate in the Oscar telecast (she presented the award for Best Picture). She had her famous 70-carat Taylor-Burton diamond made into a pendant so she could showcase it on Oscar night. She asked Edith Head to design this lilac chiffon gown especially for her. The sentimental and superstitious Burton donned red tuxedo socks, honoring the red dragon on the Welsh flag for luck.

And yet Burton still went home a six-time Oscar loser, married to a two-time Oscar winner, and their relationship continued to unravel at an accelerated rate. Their fights became even more frequent and more bitter. Fueled by her alcohol/drug/medical problems, his renewed drinking and self loathing and their mutual crappy career choices, the stress fractures gave way to an earthquake. Though they would each marry two other partners, there is no doubt that this relationship represented the love of their lives. I wish they had been able to admit they were alcoholics in 1963 instead of 1975 for Richard and 1983 for Elizabeth, who was also battling addiction to prescription medication. Perhaps, with counseling but without booze, they could have lived happily ever after together.

Though he was disappointed by his Oscar losing streak, Burton turned it into an amusing anecdote, explaining that he was the only actor to lose to TWO drunk cowboys. In 1966 his embittered Spy Who Came in from the Cold lost the Oscar to Lee Marvin's Kid Shelleen in Cat Ballou. Then his Henry VIII lost to John Wayne's Rooster Cogburn.

He would earn a 7th nomination for the movie Equus. That night he went to the Oscars with a new wife, Susie Hunt, and lost to Richard Dreyfus in The Goodbye Girl. With those 7 losses he ranks second on the all-time losingest actor list. Only Peter O'Toole has him beat with 8 losses. But then, O'Toole lived to get an honorary Oscar, while Burton died while still in his 50s, and didn't live to enjoy those end-of-career accolades that elder statesmen receive.

A review of Burton's Oscar-nominated turns is so impressive that it's a shame today he's remembered more as a paparazzi target and tabloid staple than as a unique and wonderful screen presence:
•   My Cousin Rachel (1952)
•  The Robe (1953)
•  Beckett (1964)
•  The Spy Who Came in from the Cold (1965) 
•  Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf (1966)
•  Anne of the Thousand Days (1969)
•  Equus (1977)

For what it's worth, my favorite Burton performance wasn't even nominated for an Oscar. Back in 1959, he starred in Look Back in Anger. He's charming, intense, poetic and furious. For his searing portrayal in this intimate, low budget British film, he was nominated for both a Golden Globe and BAFTA. Alas, he didn't win those, either. But he did capture a corner of my heart.

Want more Oscar? From Feb 1 to March 1 you can discover a month's worth of posts by visiting Paula's Cinema Club, Once Upon a Screen and Outspoken and Freckled.

 

That went well

I had brunch today with my friend Kathy to celebrate her birthday. Before the meal, we went to church together, where she was surprised to see her name in the bulletin. The flowers at the chalice table (the pink ones) were provided by me in on honor of her birthday. This made her very happy.

Kathy and I have had a rough couple years. But she has worked very hard to get back on my good side and I can't help but be moved by that. And I respect the decades and decades that we have invested in one another. But I've learned that a couple hours together every few months is the way for us to go.

I'm also happy to report that my new hair cut looked okay this morning. I woke up this morning, felt how short my hair was on the left side, and thought, "Oh, shit, I really did do that, didn't I?" But I like it. I'm glad I mixed it up a little.

Sunday Stealing

To play along, click here.

1:What was the last argument you had about? I think Jack Nicholson has become pathetic. Tony thinks he's still cool because he's Jack.

2:How long is your longest relationship? I "Beatle-bonded" with my oldest friend when I was 6 and she was 7. We're still in contact almost every day and I'm meeting her in Vegas for my birthday this year.

3:What is something not many people know about you? I have always had incredibly flat feet. (Hey! You didn't specify, "something interesting!"

4:Two truths and a lie. Go. An old boyfriend switched to guys after we broke up; I have only fired a gun once, when I was a very young girl and we were visiting relatives on a farm; I used to love red wine but now I can't stand the sight of it. (Answers below)

5:Do you believe in fate/destiny? Kinda/sorta

6:Where is somewhere you’ve always wanted to live? I love Chicago and would never move. But I have felt very comfortable and happy in Boston and Philadelphia.

7:Has there ever been a song that made you cry? 

8:Do you jump/scare easily? Very

9:Which birthday has been your favorite? All of them!

10:Have you ever been pulled over? Arrested? Nope. I don't drive.

11:Have you ever been to a fortune teller? Yes

12:What’s your favorite series of books? I read several series. Right now I'm looking forward to Dust, the latest in the Kay Scarpetta mystery series.

13:Who is someone that you think knows the most about you outside of family? My best friend knows me better than many of my relatives.

14:What is the weirdest thing you’ve eaten? Shark.


15:List one of your quirks. I have an unintentionally good memory for pop culture trivia. I don't mean to remember this stuff, I just do.


16:State 1 bad habit of yours. I can be quite a slob.

17:Has a scary movie ever given you nightmares? The recent Gravity scared the shit out of me

18:When was the last time you got your hair done in a salon? Yesterday. See post below.

19:What was the last thing you did with your friends? I just got back from brunch with my friend Kathy.

20:What’s something that you like to do that others might see as weird? I really enjoy alone time. I can very happily go an entire weekend without talking to anyone.

21:What was the last trip you took? I spent Christmas in Key West.

LIE/TRUE/TRUE I just said that because I watched a Will and Grace marathon last night.

Because it's been a long, cold, lonely winter

Saturday I changed my hair. Just the cut, not the color. I hope that Sunday morning I can recreate the look. That's always the concern when you change your style, isn't it? And how will it look when it starts to grow out?

Oh, Gal, calm down. It's just hair.