Teaser Tuesday

Here's how to play.

• Grab your current read
• Open to a random page
• Share “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
• BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)

Looking for Jane by Heather Marshall is historic fiction, set in Toronto in the recent past, before abortion became legal in Canada.

It's 1980. Nancy, a sheltered girl just out of her teens, accompanies a cousin "in trouble" to get an illegal abortion. It's a harrowing experience with pain and blood and the girls end up taking a cab to the nearest ER. Nancy is left alone in the waiting room while doctors scramble to save her cousin.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Nancy says. She doesn't plan on answering any of this doctor's questions, either.

"Your friend is lucky to be alive." Dr. Gladstone pauses, lowers her voice. "Listen to me carefully, Nancy. I don't actually want you to say anything specific. But if I'm on the right track, I need you to give me some indication that that's the case so I can provide the right treatment for your friend ..."

Counting backwards from 170

I am out $170. Money for which I am getting nothing in return. I am trying not to make this situation about the money, but I would be lying if I told you the money isn't upsetting.

Back around the new year, my oldest friend began saying she wanted to come to Chicago in August for The Fest for Beatle Fans. She could not afford to come last year, and we haven't seen one another since the Fest in 2022. The Fest is expensive and kinda dopey, but it can also be great fun and it's fitting my friend and I because we are Beatle bonded. We were first graders when we watched the Lads from Liverpool on The Ed Sullivan Show and fell in love (me with Paul, her with George).

So I was in. When she was still talking about the trip in March, I figured it wasn't just a daydream. I put in for time off work and asked my friend if it was OK with her that I reserve the hotel room. The hotel room is key. My oldest friend has mobility/health/anxiety issues. If we're in the hotel where the fest is held, all she has to do is roll out of bed and get on the elevator. No decisions need to be made in advance. No concerns about stairs or steps or ADA-complaint vehicles. If reservations were made at least 90 days in advance, we'd get a special nightly rate -- $170 vs. the regular $204. 

She told me to go ahead. I sent her a copy of the confirmation.

Then she stopped talking about the trip. I knew I was in trouble when I asked her if she had her flights. LAX-ORD is one of the nation's most heavily traveled routes. United, American, and Spirit all take off and land multiple times each day. Why my friend has trouble getting a flight is confusing to me, but whatever. Somehow everything in her life is more complicated than it is in mine. "What are the dates again?" she asked. Uh-oh, so she hasn't even been looking and she didn't retain a copy of the confirmation. Got it.

More weeks go by. No mention of the trip.

Finally, last week, I sent her an email asking her if she was still coming in. No answer. I sent it again, this time with a more wheedling tone. Yesterday she confirmed via text what I already knew: she's not coming.

Oh, she has reasons! Her health is precarious. Her landlord is threatening to evict her. All that is true. The thing of it is, though, her health was precarious and her landlord wanted her out back in March, too.

I was able to cancel the reservation, but to get the lower rate I had to agree to a one-night deposit/penalty. And so now I am out $170.

Her life is a battle. She is overweight and has a bum leg. She is diabetic and has trouble regulating her blood sugar. Her kidneys are failing. Her anxiety is often off the charts. 

She has no money. The cousin she moved to LA to be with has made it clear: my friend can't depend on her family. Her romance with Robert is no romance at all -- she has to deal with the man she's fallen in love with dating other women -- but she hangs on because he is, quite literally, her only friend within 2000 miles.

Looked at through that prism, my heart breaks for her. It must take courage for her to face each day. 

Which is why I'm counting backwards from 170 and biting my tongue. 

While I could be (and often am) angry at her for how she got into this mess, the fact is she's here. She is, fundamentally, a bright and funny woman who has fucked things up monumentally and, at 67, doesn't have much runway ahead of her to correct her course. Her life is hard enough without my judgement.

I love her. She deserves my compassion.

$170 is more than a week's pay at the card shop, so I'm disgruntled and infuriated. But more than that, I am just so sad about this whole damn situation. 

Photo by Alexander Grey on Unsplash

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: The Star Spangled Banner (1991)
... because Thursday was the 4th of July and we're still celebrating!

Unfamiliar with this Whitney's rendition? Hear it here.

1) Whitney Houston originally performed this in front of over 73,000 at the 1991 Super Bowl. What's the biggest crowd you have ever been in? I scoff at 73,000! I've been in two of Grant Park's biggest crowds: Lollapalooza to see Sir Paul in 2015 (100,000) and most exciting of all, Barack Obama's 2008 victory speech in 2008 (240,000). It's funny, but I feel safer in a six-figure crowd of like-minded people than I do on an empty nighttime street.

2) Whitney's version of The National Anthem was released 10 years later, after 9/11, and the proceeds went to support New York's first responders. It was her last Top Ten single. What's your favorite Whitney Houston song?

 

 

3) Whitney's friends recall she loved lavender -- both the color and the scent. What's your favorite color? What's your favorite scent? I love blue and wear it all the time. My favorite scent is cinnamon.

4) Whitney had a sweet tooth and loved Fruity Pebbles. If you reached for a snack right now, would it be sweet or salty? Sweet. I have cupcakes in the kitchen. If you're very quiet, you can hear them calling my name.

5) Whitney's grave marker bears the words, "I Will Always Love You," so clearly her family is proud of her best-selling recording. How would you like to be remembered? To borrow from the phrase I heard all the time as a little kid, "A Girl Scout leaves a place better the she found it." That's still me. I hope I'll be remembered as someone who did good.

6) Going back to 1991, when this recording was first popular, consumers who had a cell phones likely had flip phones. Technology has come a long way, hasn't it? What did you most recently use your cell phone for? (Calling, texting, looking something up, taking a photo, posting on your blog or social media ...) Texting with Gregory about our friend John's upcoming celebration of life. His birthday was July 3. I feel like it's John's and my last birthday together. Still hurting over this.

7) In 1777, Colonists celebrated July 4 with the firing of cannons and muskets, followed by a public reading of the Declaration of Independence. What did your neighborhood to to celebrate the 4th of July? We had a parade.

8) The Revolutionary War still raged during that summer of 1777. General George Washington allowed his soldiers to celebrate with a double ration of run on July 4. Do you know anyone who is serving in the military this 4th of July? Nope.

9) Celebrity chef Rachael Ray says she considers mini-hamburgers, or "sliders," the All-American food. What will/did you dine on to celebrate the 4th of July? I had a hot dog.

Thursday Thirteen #366

13 facts about Independence Day. My July 4 will be low key, first working at the card shop and then watching Yankee Doodle Dandy on TCM. I'll be celebrating the holiday with my movie group on Saturday. It's fun to enjoy the camaraderie of friends and good food. 

And, speaking of fun, I enjoyed reading these.

About the 4th of July ...

1. There were 2.5 million Americans on July 4, 1776. There will be more than 340 million on July 4, 2024.

2. In the 18th century, it was considered unpatriotic to shop or conduct business on July 4. Today, our biggest retailers (Walmart, Target) and fast food chains (McDonald's, Taco Bell) will be open.

3. Emergency rooms are busy on July 4, due in large part to accidents with fireworks.

4. We like "liberty." 35 towns are named Liberty and 7 named Libertyville.

5. July 4th is the biggest day of the year for hot dog consumption. I've got weiners and buns ready to go!

6. Lots of musicians were born on July 4, from Stephen Foster to Post Malone. Former First Daughter Malia Obama was born on July 4, too.

7. Three of our founding fathers died on July 4 (John Adams, Thomas Jefferson and James Monroe).

8. Zachary Taylor died on July 9 of a stomach ailment, likely the result of spoiled fruit eaten at a July 4 celebration.

9. As President of the Continental Congress, John Hancock was the first to sign the Declaration of Independence. (What a pretty signature it is, too!)

10. Edward Rutledge of the SC delegation was the youngest person to sign the Declaration of Independence.

11. We have had 27 iterations of our flag. The one we have now -- 13 stripes for the original colonies and 50 stars representing the states -- was adopted in 1960.

12. This is a time of celebration for North America. The Canadians celebrate the anniversary of their Constitution Act on July 1.

13. The Commonwealth of Massachusetts was the first to declare July 4 a holiday. Today it's observed in all 50 states, American Samoa, Guam, Palau, Micronesia, the US Virgin Islands and Puerto Rico. (Perhaps more. Please don't regard this as an exhaustive list of our territories.)

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

 

 

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

PS I no longer participate in WWW.WEDNESDAY via that link because her blog won't accept Blogger comments. I mention this only to save you the frustration I experienced trying to link up.

1. What are you currently reading? Looking for Jane by Heather Marshall. This novel is about three women living in three different time decades: in the 1970s, a girl is sent to a home for "fallen" women where she awaits the birth of her baby; in the 1980s, a young woman finds herself pregnant with nowhere to turn; in 2017, a woman accidentally comes into possession of a letter with explosive information about a long-ago family scandal, and wrestles with what to do with it.

 

This book takes us back to those tragic days before abortion was safe and legal, and though it's sent in Toronto, it's a harrowing harbinger of what we may be returning to.*

It's important that at the center of each story, the woman are three-dimensional people. When I hear fucking nonsense about babies being born, killed and tossed aside by abortion doctors I want to scream. First, that seldom if ever happens. Second, doctors who perform abortions are not monsters, they are serious professionals who want to provide healthcare. Third, where is the compassion for the women who find themselves in overwhelming and often dangerous and always painful situations?

2. What did you recently finish reading? Living the Beatles Legend: The Untold Story of Mal Evans by Kenneth Womack.  Mal Evans was with the Beatles from their days at The Cavern all the way to their "Get Back/Let It Be" rooftop concert on Savile Row, and even beyond. He had a story to tell, and unfortunately died before he could share it with us fans. His son worked with rock historian Kenneth Womack to get it to us.

There was a lot in this book I found interesting. However, not 580 pages' worth. This tome could have used a good editor. Once the Beatles stopped touring, once they started Apple Corps., the book got way less interesting because I didn't find the intricacies of he music business skullduggery that interesting (particularly because it seldom had anything to do with John, Paul, George or Ringo). I'd say this book is for superfans, except I'm a superfan and I liked it but didn't love it.

 

3. What will you read next? Don't know.

 

*I am personally opposed to abortion. My faith should not be the law of the land, because legislating one religion over another is unpatriotic. I've spoken to friends who are Jewish and agnostic and 100% respect their points of view, and whoever you are reading this, I respect yours, too. Just as I'd never force a woman to have an abortion, I wouldn't presume to forbid her, either. Because as a proud American looking forward to July 4, I respect the separation between church and state.

 

 

Teaser Tuesday

 

Here's how to play.

• Grab your current read
• Open to a random page
• Share “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
• BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)

Living the Beatles Legend: The Untold Story of Mal Evans by Kenneth Womack. This book was compiled using the diaries of the late Mal Evans, the Beatles confidante, bodyguard and roadie beginning with their early days at the Cavern Club.

By 1967, the Beatles had stopped touring so his job as "tour manager" had morphed into something else. Mal was an executive at Apple Corps, but he felt he was becoming marginalized by his beloved Beatles. He was drinking and drugging more, his marriage was in trouble, and he was self-reflective in his diary.

"Fear is knowing the right answer," he observed, "while hoping it's the wrong answer." But it also occurred to him that the concept of fear might be something even more problematic, that "fear is not even knowing the right answer." Had his moral compass become so broken that it was too late to reorder his misplaced priorities?

 

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: People (1964)

Unfamiliar with this week's song? Hear it here.

1) In this song, Barbra Streisand sings that pride can get in the way of happy relationships. Have you found that to be true? Yes.

2) The photo on the record sleeve was taken on Chicago's Oak Street Beach, as Barbra watches the sun rise over Lake Michigan. Have you been to the beach yet this summer? No, and I have no plans to. While, as Barbra showed us, Chicago has lovely beaches, I prefer the Riverwalk. It's a nice little oasis amid all the office buildings (and no sand).

3) Barbra performed "People" more than 1,350 times when she played Fanny Brice onstage in Funny Girl. She also did it in her Oscar-winning turn as Fanny in the film version. She performed it in her first TV special back in 1964 and in at least 510 concerts since. That's a lot of "People!" Can you think of another performer who has/had a song that is so identified with them you can't imagine seeing them in concert without hearing it? I'll go with this one, though he doesn't do it in concert anymore. At 80+, he says his voice can't do it justice anymore.

4) Barbra got her first pet, a poodle named Sadie, as a gift from the Funny Girl behind-the-scenes crew when she was 23 years old and she's had dogs in her life ever since. Did you have pets when you were growing up? Yes. Of course. My mother was a big animal lover, and I inherited my Ellie Mae Clampett tendencies from her.

5) Barbra has always taken her Jewish faith seriously, beginning with her days at the Yeshiva of Brooklyn. 70 years later, her old school is still there. How about your grammar school? Does it still stand? Yes. The building itself is 66 years old and recently went through a remodel. My sister works there now as a lunch mom.

6) She tried marijuana a couple times but didn't like it and the only alcohol she drinks is the occasional beer with her Chinese food. Are you like Barbra and generally abstain? Or do you enjoy pot and/or alcohol? I limit myself to three drinks/week, and have never, ever smoked pot. (I just cannot stand the thought of holding smoke in my lungs and letting it out through my nose like a dragon. Ick!)

7) Barbra's favorite lunch is a bowl of Campbell's condensed tomato soup. If we were to peek into your pantry, would we find any canned soup? Yes, but not tomato. I hate tomato soup! I've got clam chowder and chicken noodle in my cabinet right now.

8) In 1964, when this song was popular, hats were, too. The Sears Spring/Summer catalog devoted six pages to ladies hats and two pages to mens. Are hats part of your wardrobe? Nope.

9) Random question: Which of your personality traits has gotten you in the most trouble? My big mouth.

 

 

Thursday Thirteen #365

13 words/phrases from the OJ Simpson murder trial. 30 years ago this month, the Simpson saga grabbed the United States by the throat and held on. 

 

At the time, much was made of how the case revealed racial fissures in our nation, but honestly, that's not how I experienced it. To me, it was all about gender. I was shocked by how many of the men in my life reacted to it. For example, one young man I was working with opined -- after hearing one of Nicole Brown's 911 calls about domestic abuse -- that "of course" OJ could break into his ex-wife's house because his money was paying for it, and that domestic violence is no indicator of homicide. I never looked at him the same way after that. That young art director must be nearly 60 now. I wonder if his views have evolved with time. I hope so.

Anyway, here are 13 words/phrases that were in the national vernacular 30 years ago.

1. Bundy Drive in Brentwood. The scene of the double homicide that took place on June 12, 1994.

2. Rockingham. OJ Simpson's 7 bedroom estate.

3. Ron Goldman. The 25-year-old aspiring actor and model who waited tables to pay the bills. He was murdered alongside Nicole Brown.

4. Mezzaluna. The Italian restaurant where Nicole Brown had her last meal, and where Ron Goldman worked.

5. Kato Kaelin. Friend to both OJ and Nicole, he lived in the guest house on the Rockingham property. He became a star witness in the trial.

6. Kato the Akita. Named after Kaelin by the Simpson children, this dog was the only witness and his pawprints were visible at the bloody crime scene.

7. Robert Kardashian. Now known as ex-husband of Kris Jenner and father of Kim, he first came to prominence as OJ Simpson's friend and lawyer.

8. AC Cowlings. Another friend and former teammate of OJ's, known for being behind the wheel of ...

9. The White Bronco. While evading arrest, OJ Simpson led the LA police on a slow speed, nationally televised chase in a white Ford Bronco.

10. Marcia Clark. The lead prosecutor. Her curly perm became the topic of public debate. Today she is an author.

11. DNA evidence. It's hard to believe now, but 30 years ago DNA was a new and confusing innovation. The defense convinced the jury that the blood evidence could have been contaminated and corrupted to the point that the DNA results were unreliable. It's unlikely a 2024 jury would accept this as "reasonable doubt."

12. "If it doesn't fit, you must acquit." A bloody left-handed glove was found near the murder scene. It's mate was discovered at Simpson's home. During the trial, OJ stood before the jury and struggled to get the bloody glove on his hand but couldn't. His lead attorney, Johnnie Cochran, told the jury in closing arguments, "If it doesn't fit, you must acquit."

13. Faye Resnick. An interior designer and friend to Nicole Brown. Simpson's defense team used the fact that Faye had been in and out of rehab to create reasonable doubt, supposing that Nicole had been killed by drug dealers.

30 years on, how many of these did you remember?

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

Of course he died in June

His soul soars free

I found out Saturday night that my friend Henry is gone. He actually passed away at 7:45 PM on Friday, June 22. We knew the end was near for a while now. I am just grateful that he died during Pride Month, because Henry defined himself as a proud gay man, and looking back on his loving life, I can see how his homosexuality colored his life.

He grew up in Puerto Rico and went to Catholic grammar and high schools. He always knew he was "different," never romantically drawn to women, never had any interest in sports.*

This outsider status drove him to find ways to express himself. He was fluent in Spanish and English and could read/translate Italian and French. At one time he was a wizard at computer graphics -- that's what brought him to the advertising agency where we both worked -- and later he won local Key West awards for his poetry and fiction.

It also imbued him with sympathy, empathy and compassion. There wasn't a stray dog, cat or person who didn't touch his heart. When they left Chicago for Key West, they took two cars -- one for their belongings and the other for the two dogs and two cats they'd adopted. 

Not long after they arrived in Key West, Henry and Reg added a third dog to the menagerie. A small black mop with short legs. He was the dog of a young man, a fellow busboy Henry had befriended while working at a hotel restaurant. The busboy died of AIDS. His parents, in Miami, had disowned him "for his lifestyle" and refused to come down to Key West for the dog. It's important to note that these parents requested their son's "property of value" be shipped to them. But they would not travel the 160 miles to tend to their son's remains or get his dog. My Henry handled that for these fabulous "Christian" parents.

About a decade later, Henry was teaching at the college. One of his students took a job in Miami and promised to come back for his cat. I think you can guess what happened. Renamed Annie Wilkes after the Kathy Bates character in Misery, this ornery old girlcat lived out her life with Henry and Reg, where the windowsill was her favorite spot. Yes, she was moody and mean when they took her in, but that's because she was in pain. Her teeth were literally rotting in her head. They restored her health and gave her comfort and peace. At this time, Henry and Reg were working four jobs between them, and they chose to spend their money the cat under their roof who was in discomfort.

And the Lilly Pulitzer dresses! During the summer between second and third grade, my niece had a growth spurt. When she returned to school, she was a head taller than her tallest classmate. She felt like a giantess. She compensated by insisting on wearing only dresses -- the frillier the better -- never slacks because dresses were what she needed to feel pretty. The battles between my little niece and her mother were fucking epic. I shared this Henry. He promptly got on his bike and rode across the island to the Lilly Pulitzer outlet store. He reasoned -- correctly, of course -- that none of her Chicagoland classmates would be wearing resortwear for back-to-school. She felt beautiful and proud in her lilac and pink floral dresses from faraway Key West. My niece is now married and over 30, and can still describe those dresses in detail. 

I could go on ... and on ... and on about the kindnesses Henry showed me and others. His heart was open to anyone who was sensitive, alone, or in distress.

Thank God he found MCC. He always loved and accepted Christ but felt that the Catholic Church had rejected him. With MCC, he finally had a spiritual home, where he was welcome to both love his husband and worship. I attended Christmas Eve services there with him and being part of that congregation filled him with such joy. He and I were so different in that way. I consider my faith private. When I go to church, I want to contemplate my personal relationship with God. I don't care if I don't speak to another soul. Not Henry. He thrived on the fellowship and hymns. He loved translating the week's lesson to Spanish for those in the congregation who were ESL.

Saturday night, when I heard of his passing, one of the first things I did was set the alarm clock. Even though it's unseasonably hot, even though I could stream the service and worship while still in my pajamas, I knew -- just knew -- how Henry would want me to celebrate his life. I got up early, put on makeup and jewelry, and hauled my fat ass to church. I sat alone in the pew and cried a little. 

I was sorry for the suffering he'd endured at the end, and grateful that he is finally at peace.

I was grateful that God sent him to me. Henry used to say I was his "true sister," and I loved him like a brother. I will miss him forever.

*Oh, but he was handy around the house. Going to The Home Depot with Henry was an education. Furniture, glass, plumbing ... before his accident, he was adept at it all. And so I leave with you Henry's travel hack: Before setting out on a road trip, check in advance for the Home Depot locations along the way. They are uniformly open until 9:00 or 10:00 PM, sell things you always need (like cleansing wipes and bottled water) and have the cleanest, safest bathrooms. You're welcome.

Photo by Mateus Campos Felipe on Unsplash

WWW.WEDNESDAY

 

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

PS I no longer participate in WWW.WEDNESDAY via that link because her blog won't accept Blogger comments. I mention this only to save you the frustration I experienced trying to link up.

1. What are you currently reading? Living the Beatles Legend: The Untold Story of Mal Evans by Kenneth Womack.  Mal was a familiar sight to us Beatle fans. A little taller, a little older than "the boys," bespectacled Mal was their indespensible roadie. He was there from their beginnings at Liverpool's Cavern Club to the end on the rooftop for the Let It Be/Get Back concert. He was the inspiration for Shake, one of the Beatles' aides-de-camp in A Hard Day's Night and had cameos in both Help! and Magical Mystery Tour. He's got a story to tell about the act you've known for all these years, and here it is. Womack uses Mal's diaries and notes, as well as the reminiscences of his family and friends to tell us what it was like to "live the legend."

2. What did you recently finish reading? Kick: The True Story of JFK's Sister and the Heir to Chatsworth by Paula Byrne. Kathleen Kennedy was known as "Kick" to everyone. She was Joe and Rose Kennedy's second daughter and the fourth of their nine children. She was very close to her brother, Jack, the future President. 

 

What a life she had! Summers at the Cape and winters in Palm Beach. Convent schools in Europe. In the same year, she met both The Pope and Mussolini. When her father was Ambassador to the Court of St. James, she was the star of the social swirl in pre-War London. Then, after war broke out and she returned to the US, she moved a bit out of her family's powerful orbit and got a job in Washington DC. She returned to wartime London to volunteer for the Red Cross ... and marry a Lord who was on his way to battle and, ultimately, a hero's death. As a titled widow and an heiress she embarked on a scandalous romance with her "own Rhett Butler." She boarded a small private plane to Cannes to introduce her lover to her father and hopefully gain his approval -- despite her financial independence, she was still a Kennedy. It crashed, killing all four passengers. She was 28.

 

One of her "best chums" was Evelyn Waugh, who would write Brideshead Revisited and based the character of Julia in large part on Kick. Her husband, Billy Hartington, was godfather to Andrew Parker Bowles. Yes, Queen Camilla's first husband. Kick's was a short, dazzling, ultimately tragic life. I wonder why it's never been made into a Netflix series.

 

3. What will you read next? Don't know.

 

 

Teaser Tuesday

Here's how to play.

• Grab your current read
• Open to a random page
• Share “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
• BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)

Living the Beatles Legend: The Untold Story of Mal Evans by Kenneth Womack. This (gulp) 590-page book was compiled by using the diaries of the late Mal Evans, the Beatles confidante, bodyguard and roadie beginning with their early days at the Cavern Club.

Mal memorably demonstrated his loyalty and value to the pre-international fame Lads in 1963 when he drove them home to Liverpool from London (more than four hours). Mal was behind the wheel of a crappy van whose windshield shattered, and he was facing cold, fog and wind head on.

John later recalled, "Mal had a paper bag over his head with just a split in it for his eyes. He looked like a bank robber." Meanwhile, John, Paul, George and Ringo huddled together in the rear of the van, sharing a bottle of whiskey, stacked one atop the other to generate much needed warmth. "And when the one on the top got so cold it was like hypothermia was setting in, he'd get his turn on the bottom and we'd warm each other up that way, swigging the whiskey. It was, in Paul's words, "a Beatle sandwich."

 

Saturday 9

Unfamiliar with this week's song? Hear it here.

1) In this song, Hank Williams sings that his fishing pole is broke and the creek is full of sand. OK, so he can't spend his Saturday fishing. What are your Saturday plans? Getting my hair cut, watching baseball, trying to keep cool.

2) He regrets how shabby his shoes are. Do you shop for shoes online, or do you prefer going to the store and trying them on? I prefer trying them on in the store.

3) This was the last Hank Williams song to be released during his lifetime. Though he was only 29 when he died, he left an enduring mark on American music and is considered one of country music's greatest singer/songwriters. Who is your favorite country music performer? Do you know Mary Chapin Carpenter? I love this old song of hers.

4) Elvis was a big fan and his favorite Hank Williams song was "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry." What's your favorite Elvis song? It changes with my mood. Right now, it's this one.

5) Johnny Cash was a big Hank Williams fan, too. He performed Hank's gospel song, "I Saw the Light" often in concert and during his guest starring role in a 1974 episode of Columbo. Did you watch Columbo, or do you stream it or catch it in reruns? I recently discovered Columbo and I love it. I catch it weekends on the Cozi TV channel.

6) Hank was a prolific songwriter, composing songs on his guitar and then printing the lyrics by hand on notepaper. He never learned to read music. Can you read music? Nope.

7) When he was a teen, Hank sang and played his guitar on the sidewalk in front of a local radio station, making a little money and hoping to be discovered. His plan worked and he was occasionally invited in to play with the radio station's house band. Were you a hard-working teen? No. I was fabulously lazy as a teen, a trait I've carried with me into adulthood.

8) Hank suffered from a congenital spinal condition and began self-medicating with alcohol during his teen years. He was warned against this early on by country superstar Ray Acuff, but Hank was unable to deal with the pain without liquor. Can you recall wise advise you wish you'd taken, but didn't? When I was in my 20s I was involved with a handsome, charming man who treated me terribly. My closest friends told me to break it off, but their criticism made me defend him and convinced me I loved him even more. I wasted a decade. I should have listened. I don't regret loving him -- how can you regret love? -- but I regret my wrong-headed tenacity.

9) Random question: What's your favorite Mexican food? I'm told it's not really Mexican food but I don't care. Every now and again I love a Taco Bell soft shell taco.

I don't care what you say! I love it.

 

 

 

Thursday Thirteen #364

  

13 popular Paul McCartney songs. June 18 was Sir Paul's 82nd birthday, and I'm celebrating by listing his biggest hits, according to Spotify.

1. 45 Seconds.

2. Wonderful Christmastime. 

3. Band on the Run.

4. Live and Let Die. 

5. Maybe I'm Amazed.

6. The Girl Is Mine.

7. Jet.

8. Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey.

9. Another Day.

10. Junk.

11. Hope of Deliverance.

12. 1985. 

13. No More Lonely Nights.

I admit some of these wouldn't have made my list of 13 fave raves, but I'm glad that at 82 Sir Paul is still reaching a wide audience. In fact, he just announced another European tour. Long may he reign!

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

 

Her bathroom is ten miles away?

Saturday morning, I woke up at about 2:30 AM (as I will) to go to the bathroom. I farted around a little on my laptop to help me get back to sleep and found this email from my oldest friend. She lives outside Los Angeles, so I'll use her time stamps to tell the rest of this story. 

TO ME (AND HER ADULT DAUGHTER): 12:10 AM

I've lost my self phone and am not too happy about it. Yours in misery, me.

ME TO HER (AND HER ADULT DAUGHTER): 12:23 AM

Have you asked Alexa to call you? That's my go-to at times like this.

TO ME (JUST ME): 3:17 AM

All is well! Fou d the little thing 10 miles away. Making   run for it.

ME TO HER: 3:28 AM

Where did you leave it? How did you find it?

At this point, I assumed she'd used Alexa to call her phone and it rang at the home of her friend/one-night stand/major crush, Robert. I figure he answered and told her he would bring it over. She has major medical issues and should not be without her phone.

I heard nothing more from her Sunday afternoon, more than 24 hours later.

TO ME (JUST ME): 1:20 PM

All is well! I just tore up my house and found it in the bathroom. I know! Go figure. How're things going? Going to Robert's for Dad's Day.

ME TO HER: 3:20 AM

Your bathroom is 10 miles away?

That was Sunday. This is Wednesday. She hasn't responded so clearly, we're not going to talk about it.

I know that she's diabetic and when her blood sugar drops precipitously, she gets confused. She told me how embarrassed she was, not that long ago, when she called the police about an intruder who turned out to be a pile of laundry on her sofa. I suspect this is what happened before dawn on Saturday. 

I'm nearly 2000 miles away. I cannot help her. 

Her daughter and especially her cousin should be looking in on her. And then there's Robert. While he has made it abundantly clear that their relationship is never going to work romantically and that he is still looking for a lover who doesn't have my friend's weight/mobility issues, he does include her in his social life. Since she -- and I am being quite literal here -- has no other friends, getting her out among people is important.

I am so angry at her. She moved to Los Angeles without thinking it through. It's been a disaster. Five jobs before giving up and calling herself retired. Unremitting financial problems have her accepting public aid. Health problems that began when she fell and broke her elbow and now, somehow, she can't walk any distance without a cane. Isolation and anxiety. 

Her vaunted cousin, the one she moved out there to be with, does not really want to extend herself for my friend. I'm not sure my friend is completely honest with her adult daughter. It's easy to imagine what will happen when Robert finally lands on a regular bed partner.

I am worried. First John. Then Henry. Now her.

I am helpless to protect those I love. What the ever-loving fuck?

Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

 

WWW.WEDNESDAY

 

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

PS I no longer participate in WWW.WEDNESDAY via that link because her blog won't accept Blogger comments. I mention this only to save you the frustration I experienced trying to link up.

1. What are you currently reading? Kick: The True Story of JFK's Sister and the Heir to Chatsworth by Paula Byrne. I checked this book out because my library recommended it. I was curious about a Kennedy biography (from 2017) that had flown under my radar. I found it was originally published in England by a British author, and so far that makes an interesting difference. Every now and again I stop and think of the American/British relationship: "Ah, so this is how we look to them!" For example, Byrne writes about the Kennedys' Catholicism in detail -- more than the average Yankee requires -- describing a child's first communion as though a daunting cult ritual. Byrne also seems surprised that wealthy American children often had nannies and went to boarding school, "like upper-class British families." Since so much of Kick's life played out in England -- she was the 28-year-old Marchioness of Hartington when she died -- I'm hoping Byrne's very Britishness will give her story an added dimension.

Kathleen, aka Kick, was JFK's younger sister and the sibling he was closest to growing up. While Ms. Byrne has yet to make this connection, I will here: the similarities between Kick and Jacqueline Bouvier are striking. Both were unconventional, rebellious and adventurous. Both annoyed their mothers mightily. Each went everywhere with a big box camera on a strap around her neck. Both were ended up working for the now-defunct Washington Herald. Both could make John F. Kennedy laugh. I'm sorry they never met, because I'm sure Jackie and Kick would have liked one another enormously.

2. What did you recently finish reading? Siracusa by Delia Ephron. A novel about a couples vacation to Sicily. Lizzie and Michael are forty-something childless New Yorkers. She's an underemployed journalist and he's a successful playwright unsuccessfully struggling with a novel. Since college, Lizzie has known Finn. He's now a restaurateur in Portland, ME, married to Taylor. He's proud of her beautiful blonde looks and cutting-edge style. Together they have a daughter, 10-year-old Snow. Taylor brings Snow everywhere. Even on this trip, where she doesn't belong. 

You just know bad shit is about to go down.

All four of the adults take turns narrating. I was impressed by how well Ephron establishes each character's individual voice and personality. The author was also brilliant in her decision to never have Snow address us directly. We only know her from the way the others see her. The child becomes kind of a spooky Rorschach test.

This is a very grown-up contemplation of marriage. How much do spouses share with their partners, how different is a couple's private reality from their public face, how a child changes the marital dynamic. Frankly, it made me grateful to be a barren spinster. Which is not to say it's not a good book. It is! It's just scary in so very many ways.

 

3. What will you read next? Don't know.