WWW.WEDNESDAY

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

PS I no longer participate in WWW.WEDNESDAY via that link because her blog won't accept Blogger comments. I mention this only to save you the frustration I experienced trying to link up.

1. What are you currently reading? An Unwanted Guest by Shari Lapena. I'm looking for escapism, and this one neatly fits the bill.

 

When the guests check into Mitchell's Inn in the Catskills, they're looking for days of cross-country skiing and snow-shoeing, nights of good food and wine and relaxing by the fire. Then a massive, sudden storm hits. They lose power and their ability to even go outdoors.

And these stranded guests start getting dead. 

Yes, it's very much like And Then There Were None. I loved And Then There Were None. So far, I like this, too.

 

2. What did you recently finish reading? Bogie & Bacall by William J. Mann. This book starts with the premise that Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall are the most iconic, most romantic Hollywood couple of all time. I simply don't agree. Taylor and Burton, Lucy and Desi, Newman and Woodward were all, I believe, sexier and more talented, more tempestuous and interesting, and those unions created more work that I enjoy. 

 

But maybe the fact that I'm not a major fan enabled me to approach this with clearer eyes. This big (650+ pages) book is a dual biography of the stars and I now like each of them less but respect them more.

I learned that Bogart, the on-screen tough guy, was a New York blue blood who failed at all the best schools, while Bacall, who presented herself as the epitome of elegance, was the daughter of a struggling single mother and she grew up knocking around the Bronx and Brooklyn. 

Their great love story was real but it was frequently not so great. He was 45 and she was 20 on their wedding day. He was an established, Oscar-nominated, world-weary, thrice-divorced alcoholic who married an unsophisticated model-turned-actress just out of her teens. Naturally this union would have problems. He was set in his ways and reluctant to change. He still indulged in boozy nights out brawling with the boys and weekends away on his boat. She enjoyed socializing with celebrities in high style and much, much preferred dry land. They both sought emotional -- if not sexual -- comfort outside their marriage. Neither of them appears to have been especially involved as parents.

Then he got cancer, and shit got real. He needed her, and she was there. Bed pans and bandages and oxygen, she handled it all. I found this part of the book very moving. It may not have been sexy or romantic, but it was love.

She reinvented herself after he died. It took her awhile. She made lots of mistakes -- astonishingly heedless of the trauma her son endured, being 7 and right there when his father died at home -- and was not especially likeable. But she endured. I may not have ever wanted her as a friend, but when I put the book down I had admiration for her.

 

3. What will you read next? I don't know.

Deplorables behaving deplorably

Donald Trump once again made fun of a hammer attack against an 80+ year old man in his own home. His audience once again laughed.

Presumably the New Testament I was raised on is the same one that MAGA Republicans claim to adhere to. Walk me through it. Explain how this behavior squares with your faith. It doesn't match up with mine. Not at all.

This is cruelty and hate. Apparently, if you're MAGA, you enjoy this sort of thing, so I'll post it for your viewing pleasure. (Actually, I hope this will motivate people of conscience to realize what is happening with about 40% of our fellow citizens.)

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: P. S. I Love You (1953)

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

 

1) In this song, a man fills his lover in on what's going on in his daily life, including that he was in bed by 9:00 PM. Do you have a regular bedtime? I guess it depends on how you define "bedtime." I'm usually into my pjs around 9:00. That's a throwback to my junior high years, when my mom used to tell me that "polite people don't call or call on polite people after 9:00 PM." But when I go to bed is another matter. So is when I finally go to sleep.

2) He reports that yesterday it rained, but all in all, he can't complain. Do you often find yourself discussing/complaining about the weather? No, and I find it tiresome. The two friends of mine who talk weather the most are the ones who left Chicago for sunnier climes. She to Los Angeles, he to Key West. She has had to deal with wildfires, mudslides and water rationing due to drought. He had to evacuate for hurricanes more times than I can count, and always had tales of expensive storm-damaged cars, roofs, windows and landscaping. They both had a tougher time relaunching their careers in LA and Key West, too, so it's not like they regaled me with tales of time at the beach anyway. They were always working. So I'll stay here, thank you. (BTW, I looked it up and it snowed on 18 days so far this year. That's 5% of the time. I'll take it.)

3) This song was recorded many times, by artists as diverse as Rudy Vallee (1934) and Bob Dylan (2017). It's endured because the theme -- reaching out and staying in touch across the miles -- is universal. Is there anyone in your life with whom you regularly correspond? If yes, do you prefer cards/letters, emails or texts? I suppose that's the order. For anything longer than, "I'll meet you at 7:30," or "I'm on my way," texts are pretty hideous. Besides, I enjoy seeing peoples' handwriting.

4) This 1953 version was a hit for The Hilltoppers. The band members met at Western Kentucky University and took their name from the nickname of their school's athletic teams. What was the name of your school's team? Grade school was the Panthers, high school was the Bulldogs.

5) The Hilltoppers always performed in W sweaters, for Western Kentucky. Do you own any sweaters, caps or jackets that celebrate your alma mater? Not for my own school, but I have t-shirts from when I visited my niece at the Culinary Institute of Michigan and my nephew at Western Illinois University. (Go, Leathernecks!)

6) By 1960, The Hilltoppers' records weren't selling anymore. But they continued to perform and in 1970 they became the house band at The Holiday Inn in Fort Walton Beach, FL. They were so popular with tourists that they played at that Holiday Inn for years. When did you last stay in a hotel, motel or airbnb? Last month, my friend Elaine and I stayed at a budget motel in Springfield, IL. She chose it, believing that the hotel we stayed at in 2022 just wasn't worth the money. Note to self: Don't let Elaine book the hotel. The elevator smelled like weed. When I turned on the fan for the shower, the bathroom smelled like weed, too. Worst of all, when I closed the bathroom door I found the previous guests' dirty towels on the hook. EW! ICK! On the other hand, it was safe and the bed was comfortable and it was $65 cheaper than my choice. So there's that. (I did spray every available surface with Lysol or alcohol.)

7) In 1953, the year this recording was popular, the Eisenhowers moved into The White House. First Lady Mamie Eisenhower was known for her down-to-earth style. For example, she often shared her recipe for Million Dollar Fudge, saying that since it's easy to make and foolproof, she recommended her fudge as the perfect hostess gift. When you're invited to someone's home, do you bring a hostess gift? Depends on the occasion. If it's a barbecue or a party, I'll offer to help my hosts by bringing a dish a or a bottle of liquor. If it's just-only me, well, I like to think that my sparkling personality is enough. Besides, my friends and I like to meet up at restaurants and bars, anyway. It's a good way to support local businesses, and no one has to clean up afterward.

 

8) Also in 1953, radio personality Arthur Godfrey made news for having one of the nation's very first hip replacements. Have you/would you ever be part of a clinical trial, either for a new drug or medical procedure? I don't think so. A former co-worker of mine is very proud of being in a trial for a breast cancer drug and takes great pleasure thinking of the other women she helped. I'm not sure I'd be that courageous.

 9) Random question -- Do you fold your socks or roll them? Roll.

Thursday Thirteen #334

 Alexa's 13 most requested recording artists. This list is from 2022. Amazon's AI goddess hasn't spilled her 2023 secrets yet.

1. Ed Sheeran.

2. Elvis Presley. (I think this is likely the influence of last year's biopic.)

3. Taylor Swift.

4. Drake.

5. Elton John.

6. Adele.

7. Disney. (I'm assuming this is parents asking for songs from Disney soundtracks.)

8. Harry Styles. 

 

9. Queen.

 

10. Beyonce.

 

11. Beatles. 

 

12. The Weeknd. 

 

13. Ariana Grande.

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

 

"76 trombones led the big parade!"

So posts my friend Kathy to explain away her erratic behavior. She blames her non-existent memory and her rambling, non-sensical responses to my Facebook posts on her age (76). 

But here's the thing: I know people who are older and more cognizant, and no one is asking her to explain. Least of all, me. I know she's suffering from senility, or dementia, or Alzheimer's. 

Even posting "76 trombones led the big parade!" is kind of dopey. I worry that she's embarrassing herself on social media in front of hundreds of people. This weighs heavily on me. I've considered hiding my Facebook posts from her, but if she doesn't hear from me regularly, she freaks out -- saying "they" are isolating her.*

Three of us planned to travel to Dekalb and visit her but she cancelled on us at the last minute. She wasn't confident of her ability to tell time well enough to meet us at a bar near her home. Kathy says she's sure she'll be better "in spring" and we should plan on getting together then.

I have discussed this with my shrink, who keeps emphasizing to me that Kathy's condition and how it's handled are not my responsibility. Kathy is estranged from her son, but her daughter is aware of her decline. So is her sister. Her adult grandchildren all live within blocks of her. Her ex-husband visits her often. They all know what's going on. They have hard decisions to make. I'm only one of her friends, and I am more than an hour away. This is not on me, so she says.

My doctor advised me to stop hiding her posts. Just to see how it feels to let go of protecting her. So "76 trombones led the big parade!" stands. How does it feel? It feels cringey.

My shrink also reminds me Kathy has much bigger problems than dopey Facebook posts. Problems I have neither the authority nor the capacity to address. I realize that is true.

There's something else going on here, too. Kathy and I have long had a complicated relationship, one I've tried to extricate myself from more than once. (Here's a verbal snapshot from 10 years ago.) I feel guilty because I'm still mad over incidents she doubtless doesn't even remember.

I'm trying to be fair to myself and do right by her. 

It's hard.

And so I struggle. 

*I wonder if all paranoid conspiracy theorists aren't suffering from some level of cognitive failure. How far, really, is "Dr. Fauci is poisoning us with the covid vaccine" from "Mark Zuckerberg is isolating me from my Facebook friends?"

Yet another example

Republican voters like to make fun of Joe Biden's age and gaffes, but make no mention that their hero, dewy young Donald J Trump, is 77 and misspeaks all the time.

Is it that Fox doesn't report real news to them? Or are they just cruel and disrespectful to Biden?

At any rate, under oath during an examination he was no doubt prepped for, Donald J. Trump explained away signing a fraudulent statement about the Trump Organization's 2021 financial condition by saying, "I was so busy in the White House."

So he lied about the lie. Because he's senile/confused? Delusional and disconnected from the truth? Or does he lie because he's a grifter, and it's what conmen do?

No wonder I'm ridin' with Biden.

Sunday Stealing

 

ABC

A - Ambition: to be more Melanie than Scarlett

It's a battle every day

B - Birthday: the day before Thanksgiving, 11/22

C - Computer: MacBook Air

D - Dream: serenity

E - Exercise: weekly yoga and morning stretches (<<< if I remember)

F - Favorite Food: pizza or cheeseburger

G - Garden: the two happy philodendrons in my den

H - Hobby: baseball season is over so nothing is competing with my love of movies

 

Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy Onassis

I - Idol: JBKO. I admire her because she balanced responsibility and independence. She lived her life on her own terms. She survived tragedy in the spotlight. She rebuilt her life again and again. She never shirked her responsibility to her parents or her sister, as difficult as those relationships were, and she was a good mother.

J - Job: beginning tomorrow I am a Sales Associate (Seasonal) at the local card shop

K - Kids: only furry ones

L - Location: US, midwest, Chicagoland, my bedroom

M - Military: I've never served

N - Name or Nickname: None that I feel like sharing

O - Optimist or Pessimist: Optimist

 

P - Pets: Roy Hobbs and Constance MacKenzie

Q - Quote:

 

R - Reads: 38 books so far this year

S - School: a long, long time ago

T - Travel: I think my next trip is the TCM Film Festival in Hollywood this April

 

U - Unfulfilled ambition: to be organized

V - Vacation spot: I'm a domestic traveler; I have no dreams of going abroad

W - Wardrobe: jeans and a t-shirt, or jeans and a sweater (I don't do hoodies)

X - X-tra facts about me: When a doctor taps my leg with that rubber hammer, nothing happens. Never has.

Y - Years online: Many, many

 

Z - Zodiac sign: Sagittarius

 

 

15 years ago today I woke up happy

 ... because I was in Grant Park the night before, watching history being made as my Senator became our President-elect. The city has never felt safer or more hopeful than it did that night. 

I'm a proud Democrat and an even prouder campaign volunteer. This picture reminds me why I don't sit on the sidelines.

I got home and slept

I kinda sorta returned to work yesterday. I spent four hours at the card shop Friday. I got my name plate and my Employee Number. I filled out my W-4. I watched an hour's worth of HR videos about avoiding a hostile workplace. I met my coworkers, including the one who rescued me I looked blankly at a customer who asked me where the Bat Mitzvah cards were.

I went to the bank, made dinner, and took a nap. 

Then I woke up, answered some emails and did a little online banking. Then I went to bed.

So yesterday I made $80 and slept. 

Monday is my first real day of work. I can tell this is going to be an adjustment. I'm going to be using muscles left to atrophy for a year.

And I'm going to wander around the shop and learn where all the cards are.

Saturday 9

 Saturday 9: True (1983)

Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

 

1) In this song, lead singer Gary Kemp tells us he's overwhelmed by his feelings as he and a girl dance "toe to toe." What song did you most recently dance to? This is kind of embarrassing but true: I danced over to the refrigerator while listening to the theme of The Dick Van Dyke Show. The TV was on and I was grabbing a snack in the kitchen.

2) Falling in love makes him want to listen to "Marvin all night long," a reference to Motown great Marvin Gaye. What's your favorite love song, and who sings it? "Close your eyes and I'll kiss you/tomorrow I'll miss you/remember, I'll always be true." Those simple, sweet words sung by his simple, sweet voice ... Sigh.

3) This song was inspired by Kemp's feelings for singer Clare Grogan. When they first met, they discovered a shared love of literature and for his birthday, she gave him a book she thought he'd enjoy. Who received the most recent birthday gift you gave, and what was it? I gave my friend Mindy a book. We've been talking about it for years. Every time it came up, she'd say was going to get it out of the library. So for her November 1 birthday, I placed it in her hands.

4) Despite the popularity of the song it inspired, the Kemp-Grogan romance never really took off. Gary was involved with another woman and Clare was seeing other men and reluctant to settle down. The timing just wasn't right for them. Do you believe luck plays a big part in romance? Well, yes. We can only fall in love with who we meet, and since there are billions of people on the planet, luck definitely plays a part. We're lucky when someone we really click with crosses our path. We're even luckier if that person happens to be unattached and open to a relationship at the same time we are. Love is really kind of amazing, when you think about it.

5) The cover art was created by Kemp's friend, David Band. David sketched it after seeing a man startled when a bird flew too close to him as he entered a pub. To Kemp, it represented how surprised he was by the sudden intensity of his feelings for Grogan. Band went on to become a world-renowned artist, with his work exhibited in galleries and museums in Australia, New Zealand, England and the United States. What museum have you most recently visited? In August I went to the Van Gogh exhibit at The Art Institute. It was my first time back to this Chicago treasure in decades! My friend Elaine is a member and the trip was her idea, but it was one of the highlights of my summer. This was my favorite.

Roadway with Underpass

6) In 2020, Kemp and bassist Guy Pratt launched their podcast Rockonteurs about the stories behind popular songs. Do you regularly listen to podcasts? Yes. Every week I listen to The Book of Joe, by baseball manager Joe Maddon. Every now and again I tune into a classic movie podcast, You Must Remember This.

7) Super Mario Bros. debuted in 1983. Without looking it up, can you name gaming's most famous siblings? Mario and Luigi.

 

8) Also in 1983, for the first time, London's Abbey Road recording studio was open to the public. Visitors were treated to a multi-media presentation called The Beatles at Abbey Road. During the two months it was open, more than 22,000 tickets were sold. What's the most recent ticket you purchased? I went to see A Haunting in Venice at my local movie theater.

 9) Random question -- At your favorite restaurant, a genie will grant you one of these two wishes: 1) you can eat whatever you want without gaining weight or 2) you can order whatever you want for free. Which do you choose? #2, definitely! 

 

Dona Nobis Pacem

 

I am a peace blogger, inspired by the struggle we see day in and day out. In Ukraine, in Israel, in Gaza. In our cities and our small towns. On the steps of the courthouse in New York. It seems that our sense of peace, decency, and fair play is under assault every day from all angles.

All we can do is keep on keeping on.

Find other peace bloggers here.

Thursday Thirteen #333

America's 13 most recognizable women. I looked at different lists from around the web and these are 13 the internet seems to agree on.

Now by recognizable, we're talking face recognition. Not beauty, not accomplishment (though some are both beautiful and accomplished). These are American women who can be identified by their faces alone. That accounts for the list beginning in the late 19th century, when it became easier for newspapers and magazines to reproduce photos.

Here they are in chronological order, based on when they dominated the national consciousness. I'm presenting it twice -- first photos, then names. How many did you recognize by face alone?

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7. 

8.

9.

10.

11.

12. 

13.

1) Lizzie Borden: 1860-1927

2) Amelia Earhart: 1897-1939

3) Eleanor Roosevelt: 1884-1962

4) Naomi Parker (Rosie the Riveter): 1921-2018

5) Lucille Ball: 1911-1989

6) Marilyn Monroe: 1926-1962

7) Rosa Parks: 1913-2005

8) Elizabeth Taylor: 1932-2011

9) Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis: 1929-1994

10) Sandra Day O'Connor: Born 1930

11) Oprah Winfrey: Born 1954

12) Hillary Clinton: Born 1947

13) Beyonce: Born 1981

Please join us for THURSDAY THIRTEEN. Click here to play along, and to see other interesting compilations of 13 things.

WWW.WEDNESDAY

WWW. WEDNESDAY asks three questions to prompt you to speak bookishly. To participate, and to see how other book lovers responded, click here. 

PS I no longer participate in WWW.WEDNESDAY via that link because her blog won't accept Blogger comments. I mention this only to save you the frustration I experienced trying to link up.

1. What are you currently reading? Bogie & Bacall by William J. Mann. This year, I've been reading about people I've heard about my whole life but know little about. So far I've taken a little dive into the lives of Winston Churchill, Aristotle Onassis, Dwight Eisenhower and Babe Ruth. Now I'm turning my attention to Humphrey Bogart.

Within the pantheon of classic film stars, he's way, way up there. The American Film Institute named him the #1 Movie Actor of All Time. Yet he's not someone I always gravitate to, like his contemporaries Clark Gable, Cary Grant, and William Powell. And except for Lauren Bacall's recollections of their marriage -- which seem sincere but also understandably rose-colored -- I know nothing about his personal life. 

This 650+ page book is a dual biography of the stars and so far, I'm all in. The "dese dem and dose" guy on screen was a New York blue blood. He tried many jobs before landing in the theater, which gave him a sense of belonging and provided an outlet for his creativity, even though Hollywood's PR machine did everything it could to make him seem like an "accidental actor," because his more sensitive yearnings didn't fit his image.

 

One thing that makes me smile: so far (he's in his 20s), everyone calls him "Hump." I wonder when he became "Bogie," which is far more fitting for his image. Was it organic, or was his new moniker a product of PR machine, too?

 

2. What did you recently finish reading? The Last Politician: Inside Joe Biden's White House by Franklin Foer. This book takes us from the end of 2020 campaign, through the historically fucked-up transfer of power and into the Biden White House. It's about how Biden, a politician who is proud of his profession and believes in our institutions, tried to govern after the shambolic Trump years.

 

However, after the Administration recovers from the Trump team's willful obstruction and gets its bearings, it's not about a compare/contrast between Biden and Trump. It's about the CHIPS act, the American Rescue Plan and the Bipartisan Infrastructure Law. These are ambitious pieces of legislation and it was not easy to get them passed. Yet Biden did it, and we're all the better for it. That's one of the interesting things about Biden: for an 80-year-old man, he's remarkably forward thinking, and has an eye on future generations. I find this refreshing and wonder why it's not emphasized more.

This book is similarly granular in its examination of Biden and Zelenskyy. These two men are of different generations and different cultures. One is a lifelong politician, the other a showman. Theirs is not a natural relationship and it's been personally rocky. But Biden is a pro and Zelenskyy is a patriot, so the personal has not gotten in the way of their collaboration. It makes me grateful that we have a President who has been a politician for most of his life and has the muscle memory to do the right thing in these situations.

That's the thing about this book: it appeals to the Kennedy Girl in me. I grew up believing that politicians are public servants, and that being good at politics is something to be proud of. Joe Biden believes the same. Yes, it's corny and certainly not in step with today's "drain the swamp" mentality, but I think it's that attitude will help (to borrow a phrase) keep America great.

 

3. What will you read next? I don't know.