Saturday, September 11, 2010

Sunday Stealing

The Player's Meme

Cheers to all of us thieves!

1. :::sniff, sniff::: Is the dog in the house? I don't have a dog, but maybe it's time to clean the litter box.

2. What is the best piece of advice you've ever received? My mother says, "There's always a good reason not to do something." Meaning if you want to procrastinate or chicken out, you can find an excuse. It's a trap I don't want to fall into.

3. What's the worst experience you've ever had involving alcohol? Ew, this is way embarrassing. Let me preface this story by saying, "It was the 80s." I was at a holiday party with a lot of coworkers. I got very drunk. A guy I barely knew and wasn't remotely interested in offered to take me home. I was impaired enough to believe that we were getting into his car and going directly to my apartment. My boss, a little older and far wiser about alcohol and men and women, observed the situation and felt his intervention was required. He said he'd take me home. Since he had Alpha status, the coworker backed off. How did I repay my boss's kindness? By puking in his car. And I wondered why I was taken more seriously as a party girl than a professional in those days! What can I say? It was the 8os!

4. What's the worst thing you've ever done to another person? We were having a terrible argument that was going to end with us breaking up, so I said something unforgivably cruel to speed the process up a bit. I mean, I left nothing but scorched earth. He deserved much better from me and I'm very sorry.

5. Who do you think started the concept of memes? Dr. Lyle Evans. He seems to have been behind many heretofore mysterious yet influential events. (It makes sense if you have been watching Mad Men this season.)

6. Give a song title or line that describes how you are feeling right now. "Go, Cubs, go! Go, Cubs, go! Hey, Chicago, what do you say? Cubs are gonna win today." It's pretty much how I feel every day between April and September. (Mark my words: Someday, God will deliver us and the feeling will take me all through October, too!)

7. What's your favorite search engine? Yahoo!, Google, Ask, Bing? or something else? Google

8. If Paul is the Cute One and John is the Smart One and George is the Quiet One and Ringo is the Funny One, which Beatle are you? At 5'2, I could be the Short One. But, after enduring 46 years of Beatlemania, I think I've earned the title of the Slavishly Devoted One.

9. The democratic government decides that, not only do we have to share our money with people who choose not to work, we also have to share our children with those who do not want to ruin their bodies with being pregnant. Which child do you give up? I don't have kids and I don't accept the premise that I'm currently sharing my money with people who choose not to work.

10. When should you procrastinate - now or later? I'll get back to you.

11. What is your favorite fast food? Little Cheeseburger from Five Guys Burgers & Fries

12. What was your favourite game as a child? Clue. I wanted to be Miss Scarlet, even if she did turn out to be the murderer. In fact, I still want to be Miss Scarlet.

13. Why terrible twos have to be terrible. I have no idea why, but this is one of my favorite ages. I love watching them exercise their assertiveness and test boundaries. You can practically see the thoughts forming before they act. Best of all, because I'm an aunt, I'm able to simply hand them back when they cease to amuse me.

14. Describe your favorite family member. My niece is 17, a senior in high school, and very ambitious about college. She's a big fan of Tim Burton's movies, George Harrison's music, and John Krasinksi's face. I'm love her intellect, independence and sense of humor.

15. What does your favorite breakfast consist of? Eggs over easy, bacon, toast and jelly, orange juice. Yum.

16. What food is better the day after it was made? Fried chicken

17. What was your last big purchase? My camera

18. When was the last time you kissed someone and really enjoyed it? My cat Charlotte was sitting on the ledge of the bathroom sink, watching carefully as I applied mascara. She was so adorably serious that I kissed the top of her head.

19. Why are there memes? Oh, who knows? Life is full of imponderables. Why do birds sing so gay, and lovers await the wake of day? Can vegetarians eat animal crackers? We may never get definitive answers to the really big mysteries of the universe.

20. Described yourself using two words that rhyme. (i.e. fuddy-duddy) Since I'm so talkative, I christen myself a cheerful earful.

21. If you were given the option of a "do-over" in life .. would you take it? Yes, see Question #4. I wish I'd never done that.

22. What movie makes (or has made) you cry? What touched you about it? Marley & Me. When the mom (Jennifer Aniston) says, "Goodbye, Clearance Puppy," and we remember how much she and Marley have been through together, I'm reminded of what fantastic friends our pets are and how much we miss them when they inevitably leave us.

23. What is one big mistake that you did in your life? And what did you do to make it right? See Question #4. I never did make it right and I'm very sorry.

24. When Life Gives You Lemons, What Do You Do With Them? I used to run them through the garbage disposal because they cleaned the mechanism and left everything smelling fresh. But since I don't have a garbage disposal anymore, I guess I'd just give the lemons back.

25. How different are you in real life as compared to the online identity you have created for yourself? I'm more honest and less guarded here.

26. Do you know what your parents would have named you if you had been born the opposite sex? I'd have been named "John" but called "Jack."

Happy 100th to you ...

Happy 100th to you, Happy 100th dear Ryan Dempster, Happy 100th to you!

Yes, this season has sucked. But even a season of bad baseball has its bright spots, and Ryan Dempster is ours this year. He just earned his landmark 100th win and it was in Milwaukee, so a lot of Cub fans were there, so that's a delight.

Demp is deservedly a fan favorite. Spirited and funny, a great Black Hawks fan, a devoted dad and humanitarian (his daughter has a rare disorder and his foundation raises money and awareness).

And no one has ever accused him of using steroids, like Cheater McCheaty Pants, aka "Why Aren't I in Jail?" aka Roger Clemens.

In all, it sucked

This past week, I mean. First Mayor Daley announced he was abandoning us. Then we learned that Crazy Old Neighbor committed suicide. The fire in Boulder came close to my best friend's home. Less personal but still upsetting: the virulent anti-Islam mood in the country.

And 9/11 is always an occasion for sober reflection.

So I did the only sensible thing. I got a mani/pedi and stopped for a margarita on the way back. The world looks better after a mani/pedia and a margarita.

Saturday 9

Saturday 9: Tell Her No

1. When was the last time that you had to tell someone that you loved, that the answer was no? A couple Sundays ago, I had to tell my nephew I wouldn't be able to play with him

2. When was the last time you visited a hospital? Last month, for my mammogram

3. If you were to start a club, what would the subject matter be, and what would you name it? We'd go to the movies, as opposed to watching on TV or computer screen, once a month, and we'd be the Cinema Supporters.

4. Have you ever hit someone of the opposite sex? No.

5. What's the first thing you notice about the preferred sex? Hair. My first-ever crushes were Little Joe Cartwright and Sir Paul, so ever since childhood I have been drawn to men with heads of thick, shiny hair.

6. What really turns you on? A man with a great voice, soft and deep

7. What was your biggest mistake? Spending entirely too much time with the wrong man

8. Tell us something totally random about yourself. The celebrity I used to hear I looked most like was Cruise Director Julie McCoy from The Love Boat.

9. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity? Damn! Guess that makes this Saturday 8.